A/N: Ah, my first fanfiction, but not last, I'll be sure to write some more if you people think I'm worthy that is. Like Tanya said, this story all begun in Maths, after our crappy Maths teacher who really despises us (Yay us?) Bob seemed like such an idiotically amusing name that we had to use it, even if it meant extending it to Robert so it didn't seem so humorous. So yeah, enjoy…

Oh yeah, if you'd like to see the original pictures of 'Bob' Tanya or I will give a link to the photo shortly.

One sex god is seductive enough

Temptation Is a Virtue

RobertPOV:

Fuck.

A nice straightforward word, fun at parties.

Also good when you're sleeping with a whore who you really don't intend on paying.

But, simply the word sprang to mind whenever dead memories came pouring into my brain like an acid; treacherous and lethal. I hate memories, why can't we just move on and forget?

Why?

With my hands clenched on the wheel like it was a life ring, I couldn't help feeling perturbed and slightly lost. I had a destination but yet in my heart, I had nowhere to go. It was as if I was suddenly at a dead end, I could travel for an era but never reach for my goal.

Fuck.

I started the car up and flipped on the radio, almost at the point of desperation for just finding a distraction so I wouldn't have to think. That's what I'd been doing for the past nine years, not thinking. Doing everything in my utmost power to not think.

Not once.

The car started up harshly, wheezing a little with age but I turned up the volume on the radio so that the hurting noise wasn't heard. Drowning out the unwanted is how I survived, I couldn't stand there and listen to someone tell me how mistaken I was.

As the car leisurely travelled down the isolated streets of Forks, I couldn't help thinking, why the fuck would anybody want to live in this ineffectual piece of shit? You drove down ten streets and then there was sign that said 'Thank you for visiting Forks, have a nice day', it should have said 'Thank you for letting us waste your fucking time with ten roads, a high school and a few fucking shops. Screw you and don't bother coming back'. I had been around the town a good three times, getting lost in the straightforwardness, which was actually intricate in some way, like going in circles.

'Crap.' I finally said, whitewashed. I pulled over onto the sidewalk and clambered out of the car, slamming the door with such intensity that the glass reverberated. I swore again vigorously and spat on the road. I got a few tuts and murmurs as I sauntered down the street from the disgusted bunch that had witnessed my actions, but I didn't give two flying shits at what they thought. Who cares if people wish you dead? They didn't know how it feels to actually watch people die in front of you, to smell the disgusting odour of bereavement, to watch people who mean all the fucking world to you disintegrate whilst you stand there, traumatized.

I stopped walking and crouched to the ground, feeling bitter and unaided. This is why I never thought, I knew if did I would become too wrapped up in the past, the wounds would be too deep to repair, and the tears would fall.

Fucking hell.

Big boys don't cry.

But I couldn't help it as I felt the warm salt liquid trickle out of my eye, blurring my vision as I crouched even lower to the ground, but the memory was overwhelmingly bright, and so it overtook my senses…

'Pi,' He explained, chewing the tip of his pen as he tried to find the correct wording, we were in the kitchen of my Grandmas' house doing assignments. 'Pi is a shitty piece of shit that doesn't have any relevance to my future goals.' He concluded.

'Edward, just do the bloody work.' I said, working my way at a snail's pace, trying to multiply the circumference and… Whatever came next.

'I don't feel like doing this.' He said yawning.

'Oh really?' I said, hoping Edward would pick up on my sarcasm. Sarcasm was an evil trait of mine, which I constantly used to my advantage.

'Yeah I mean…' He paused. 'Fuck you, stupid Pi, hate your fucking fuckers.'

'Edward Cullen!' The strident tone of my mother called from the other room.

'Fuck she heard me.' Edward muttered, closing his eyes and mumbling excuses under his breath. That was his wicked trait, able to wind anybody around his little finger and make them believe any tale, no matter how improbable it was.

'Edward.' My mother came out of the room next door. 'I heard your vulgar use of the English language, and I say, I do not want to hear that again. Your mouth is already filled with the plaque of your lacking sanitation, and is now filled with the words of Satan.' My mother was dramatic, always jumping to conclusions about the simplest things. She was a stunning woman, only in her early thirties and with her dazzling cerulean shaded eyes and her long flaxen hair she looked like an angel from above.

'I'm sorry mother.' Edward said, an almost untraceable smirk crept in his voice. 'I didn't mean for my crudeness to offend.'

My mother sighed and walked over to where we were sitting. 'Boys, your father, he's been promoted, and me and him want to celebrate, you know break out a few bottles of wine, maybe have a cigar or two-'

'You don't smoke!' I cried out loud. 'Since when did you become a junkie?'

'Don't you ever bloody talk to me like that Robert.' My mothers' cheeks turned crimson, contrasting heavily with her whitish complexion. 'I'm proud of your father. So I'm not entitled to having a good time?' I snickered, imagining my mother drunk and fucking my father, it seemed so illusory and quite repulsive.

My mother huffed and stormed out of the room, taking two wine glasses with her. She closed the door behind her and the loud sound of a wine bottle being opened was heard through the solid walls.

'Do you think they'll get drunk?' Edward asked chuckling faintly.

'Nah.' I confirmed, 'Does our mother look like the sort who'd get wasted?' We laughed heartily.

Edward went back to cursing at his homework whilst I studied him. We were exactly the same in everyway; our hair was an array of golden waves, which shimmered almost blonde in the sunlight. Our eyes were an immature emerald tint, bewildering and mischievous. We were both built like athletes, slim but with well chiselled features. I'd go as far as saying we were fetching boys, we could effortlessly get girlfriends and others admired us. But the biggest difference between me and my brother was that I was one to use girls, I was a big craver for sex, dating girls just for the pleasure that came with them, I didn't do it 'cause I was a bastard, I did it to feel unique for that one instant. Edward treated girls with so much respect it was droll; he was an untainted waxen virgin, his dick as untouched as a nun's cunt. We were both as kind as each other, but I was able to live on the dicey side of things, whilst Edward was… just Edward.

'Finished.' I said smugly, with a sneer on my face. 'Easiest homework I've ever done.' I laughed at Edwards' furious expression. 'Ed, just think, you have a calculator, how much easier can it get?' I was lying of course; maths was unquestionably not the subject for me.

He was just about to hit me over the head with his exercise book when the most excruciating noise a soul could hear pierced my eardrums with an agonising echo. It was a scream, but not just a customary scream, it was a scream one produces when on its last legs, it was a scream that brought tears to my eyes.

'Mother.' Edwards' tone was uneven and petrified. His hands were clenched around the exercise book like he was about to implode. My senses weakened, my heart slowed but Edward jumped from his seat and dashed towards the room from where the scream had come from. My response was sluggish but I almost immediately ran after him.

I burst into the room and was welcomed by the smell of burning fabric. My father who was hollering was covered in the crimson inferno of flames, which coated the jacket he was wearing; I could see from his slurred pleas that he was drunk beyond anything. I spied quickly a packet of cigarettes on the floor next to empty wine bottles. My mother was trying to beat out the flames on my father, but her effort was hopeless. I was motionless, what could I do? My mother was screaming as my father slipped in and out of consciousness. He was dying and my mother was putting her life at risk, and I couldn't help her. The flames on my fathers smouldering body began to spread out onto the carpet. I tried to help my mother, unfreezing myself, but as the fire spread, it made it unattainable for me to aid her.

'Get out!' my mother bellowed at my brother and me. 'Get out while you still can!'

'Mom!' I yelled desperately, my throat becoming coated in the thick black smoke that was arising from what I presumed as my lifeless father's corpse. The smoke and the pain of knowing my father was probably dead made tears spring to my eyes. 'Mom! Please!' I didn't know what else to say, how could I beg her not to die? Death, unless it is suicide, is almost unavoidable. 'Mom… Don't die on me. Edward? Edward help!' I twisted around, but my twin wasn't there. He'd obviously done a runner after my mother told us to go…

'Robert, go, please.' The flames were so toweringly high that I couldn't see my mother, but her voice was a frail undertone. I backed away gradually, tears pouring down my face.

'I love you.' I said softly. 'Mom, I love you.'

I ran from the house, taking no possessions and just kept running. I didn't stop until I was a safe distance from the place I called home. I collapsed on the cool road and sobbed, for my mother, for my father and for Edward.

Did he know that I had gotten out of the house breathing?

I turned around and studied the house. I could feel the heat radiating against my skin.

'Mom…' I said softly. 'Dad…'

I was suddenly unaccompanied.

And it engulfed me worse than the blaze.

I tensed up, I was quivering but sweat was dripping down my neckline. I was sitting in the middle of a busy street reliving the past as if it was yesterday.

'Get a grip.' I hissed maliciously to myself. 'The past is the fucking past. You've moved on from it; don't even dare think about it.' I jumped up from my squat and trembled. I was going to be all right; I was going to patch up the holes that needed to be filled.

**

Half an hour later I pulled up outside a small but modernised house. The bricks were decorated a hoary grey like all the other houses on the street. It was basic, but well built, and I guessed from the many flowers planted on the crisp bottle green grass that there was a woman in Edwards' life.

Unless he turned gay…

I walked apprehensively across the lawn, treading on the many magentas and mauves of flowers on my way. I stopped outside the door, a bleak sunburnt colour. I was anxious and felt like shitting myself. My fist rose to knock the door, and remained in the same position for several seconds.

Bloody hell, just knock, I instructed my hand, but it ignored me.

Fine then, have it your way, and I ran the doorbell.

I waited for about ten seconds, hearing scuffling and then the door swung open. I was greeted by an extraordinarily gorgeous woman, she was absolutely surprising. Her long chestnut hair hung in slight curls, contrasting beautifully with her coffee coloured eyes and pale skin. She was slender, but with huge tits which were emphasised by her tight t-shirt. She was petite, but had long legs, and bloody hell, did she get me hot under the collar.

'Edward!' Her lips parted into a dazzling smile, as if me ringing her doorbell had made her world complete. I looked at her, and was about to correct her for calling me by my twins' name, when she grabbed hold of my shoulders and pulled me into the house, slamming the door behind her. She pushed me hard with her slender hands until I toppled over, onto a sofa; I looked around quickly and guessed I was in the living room.

It wasn't a bad looking place. But I was fucking shocked at what this stranger was going to do. She smiled at me naughtily and rapidly slid off her top over her head. She wasn't wearing a bra underneath, so to give her respect, I turned away.

I felt a greater pressure on my chest, and saw her leaning completely over me, her breasts heaving as she unbuttoned my t-shirt. She rubbed her breasts over my now completely bare skin, and I couldn't help but moan at her touch. I tried to ease her off so I could button back up my t-shirt, but her fingers were already wrapped around my belt, her palms gliding across my jeans. Oh man, did it feel good, but I was desperate not to go hard. She pulled hard on my belt, and unbuckled it, pulling it off and tossing it on the floor. She shuffled slightly and began to get rid of the rest of my clothes, but I was beginning to get too turned on to stop her, instead I groaned at her as she caressed my chest.

'Oh Edward.' She whispered seductively as she slid out of her jeans. This girl seemed to protest against underwear, she wasn't wearing any panties. I felt a similar sensation, and pulled her close to, pleasing her immensely.

She whispered pointless words in my ears, but then her mouth darted down my neck, over to my stomach, where her tongue began to lick forcefully, it felt so good, too good, but I was determined not to become hard. I felt quick kisses trail down to my 'manly pride' until I felt her tongue gently taste the tip of my dick, I almost yelped with pleasure that that one touch had caused, but instead, I breathed deeply, praying I would remain this calm.

I felt her groan as her hot breath enclosed my cock, sending it to shoot up, hard. She growled softly as her mouth completely covered my throbbing dick, her tongue swirling around and around as her teeth grazed it lovingly. I grabbed hold of her hair and began bucking my hips as her tongue began to work faster, her teeth nibbling harder. It was an insane pleasure, only ruined slightly when she bit down too hard, but I let that pass.

And then, the doorbell rang.

At first, she ignored it, but after it rang again she removed herself from giving head, and she stormed towards the front door, her naked body toned perfectly and her hips swaying

I lay still shocked, and touched the tip of my dick, feeling her warm spit on my hand. Why the fuck did I let this mad woman give me satisfaction? I didn't even know her name.

Back to not thinking…

A scream made me jump so high that I thought I might have had a heart attack, the scream brought back flooding memories of my mothers' scream, but I shook them off hastily. I didn't know whether to move or what, I was a naked man sprawled out onto a sofa and a woman had just pleasured me.

Officer, I swear she looked at least twenty…

I didn't have my brothers' act of good excuses.

I heard worried footsteps come towards my way and saw the woman looking horrified at me, I gave her a questioning glance but she just hurried back towards the front door. Two pairs of footsteps soon greeted me.

Bloody hell, a threesome?

I looked up at the girl and then to her companion, and then I froze, completely. My boner even went down slightly from the shock.

I was looking at me.

And Me was looking at me.

I was so unbearably confused that I just lay there, on the sofa, without moving. But then I remembered that my legs were open quite wide, so I snapped them shut swiftly, hoping nobody saw my smaller than average.

Me went pale and began muttering under his breath. I couldn't make out the words he was saying, but judging by the look on his face, they weren't words of comfort, or contentment. No, they were words or pure undiluted terror.

The woman pressed her ear against 'Me''s mouth and when she understood what he had said, she almost collapsed onto the floor.

'Robert.' Me said mutedly, but his tone rose each time he said my name. 'Robert what the fuck have you been doing to my fiancé?'

**

All three of us were sitting around a glass coffee table, with mugs of some disgusting produce tea in our hands. The silence was so awkward it made my cheeks tinge red.

I didn't mean to let your fiancé suck my dick…

'Edward,' I said hesitantly, 'look man, I swear… I didn't make the first move.' The bitch that doesn't wear panties did.

'Oh, but you didn't correct her.' Edward said venomously, slamming his mug on the table. 'You didn't take time to say that you were my brother!'

'Dude, she didn't really give me a chance to speak…' I protested weakly. 'She was like a whore, straight down to the point.' I suddenly realised what I had said, and regretted it instantly. 'I didn't mean it like that.'

His fiancé looked humiliated and blameworthy, she remained silent, but the occasional tear streamed down her face. She had gotten changed, and thankfully wore some underwear. I had pulled on a pair of jeans and left it at that.

'Edward, I'm so sorry.' She said eventually, 'you two look s-so alike, a-and I honestly couldn't tell you two apart.' She sniffled. 'Except Roberts' penis is smaller than yours.' I grimaced, but Edward didn't even smile, his face was set in a stone cold snarl.

'I just can't believe you didn't stop her.' He said quietly. 'You haven't bothered trying to contact me for what, nine years? And when you do, and my fiancé mistakes you for me, you let her do those things to you? Fuck, couldn't you tell that she was my fucking fiancé?'

I paused, 'Ed, I was a bit caught up, like I said, she really didn't give me a chance to speak.'

'Don't you dare talk about Bella like that!' His tone was brutal. Oh, the girl was called Bella, pretty name for a pretty crazy woman. 'You could, you should have told her! Why the fuck didn't you?'

'Edward, do you know what? I don't know, okay. Is that what you want to hear? I'm sorry for allowing your fiancé to suck my cock, yes; it's all my fault for her bloody stupid actions. I'll take the blame, like I always used to do. Okay?

'But you know what, I've spent a good three years looking for you, trying to find where my twin was. I've been through three states looking for you until Gran told me you lived in Forks, so I came all the way here to find your sorry ass. And now, because of the mistake your fucking fiancé mad, no offence Bella, I'm to blame? You probably would've been too shocked to tell right from wrong, and I did try and stop her, but man, for a little bugger she sure is strong. So don't fucking blame it all on me!' I paused, gasping for breath.

'Out.'

'What?' I said perplexed.

'Get out of my house.' His tone was low, and he was avoiding eye contact, but it didn't matter, he was serious.

'Edward? I've spent all this time searching for you, and you're kicking me out?'

'GET THE FUCK OUT OF MY HOUSE!' His voice echoed off the walls and caused his beloved Bella to wince.

'But-'

'Edward…'Bella said softly. 'He's right, it was my fault.' She gripped his hand, but he pulled away.

'Get out Robert.' He said finally, when I didn't move, he stood up, kicking his chair away, and pulled me to my feet. 'I said get the fuck out.' He pushed me up against the wall.

Now, I am as physically powerful as my brother, but I didn't want to fight him. I didn't want to hurt the closest relative I had left.

'We need to talk.' I pleaded as his firm hand roughly pushed me outside. 'You need to hear my point.'

'I've heard too much of your point you bastard.' He snarled, before closing the door.

I sighed; this could've gone better.

'If you only gave me a chance.' I whispered to the door. I sloped off his property and kept walking. I ended up finding myself in a park, where I slumped onto a bench and just sat there.

It was basically quite lacklustre.

I watched old women walk there dogs, saw children screaming as their parents tried to stop them. I gave dirty looks to the teenagers who returned the looks. And whilst watching all these people go by, with places to go, I wished secretly that I was in the same situation I was an hour ago.

With her.

Her lips on my mine.

Her body on mine.

Her mouth on my cock.

Paradise.

How was I to know that Edward was going to get married to such an immaculate and good-looking lady? I buried my head in my hands, my cranium sweltering with pain.

'Are you alright there?' A voice asked.

'As okay as anything.' I muttered sarcastically.

'Well, you look like crap.' The voice commented.

'Nice to meet you too.' I said looking up. It was a man, with a baby face. He had long black hair, which hung dead straight, and honest brown eyes. He was dark and a nice-looking guy.

'I'm Jacob.' He said awkwardly. Like I care? I looked at him again, and spotted a 'Gay Pride' (A/N: Tanya, Ria may kill us if she read this!) badge on his indigo shirt.

'Hello there Jacob.' I said smiling; take me away from this hell for one night please. 'I'm Robert, care to join me?' For a night of sex?

Hey, a guy can swing both ways.

If he's lonely enough that is…

A/N: Woop! I wrote it. I don't know if it's long enough, but I tried my best, if that counts for anything in the real world. Erm, well, hope you enjoy it and I'll be writing more soon ;)

Adios.