Notes: Seriously, this is way too much fun. I thought it would be when I started it but man... it just keeps being TOO FUN FOR WORDS to write.

Chapter 2: Ninjas and Ice Cream

When Danny heard from Luke what the story was, he couldn't possibly turn down the shot to see Matt dealing with godkids — what was that even like — so he let himself into Matt's apartment and almost immediately burst into laughter at what he saw.

Susie had taken her dad's job to heart and was doing her very best to baby Matt in a way that Danny had seen actual nurses and doctors get waved off or snapped at for doing — but how could Matt tell a grade schooler off for her enthusiasm?

Matt was lying flat on the couch, and Susie — impressively — had a hold of his wrist and was counting heartbeats while Katie helpfully played nurse and filled up a water bottle. He was actually getting some pretty good care, considering the ages of his helpers: they'd grabbed ice from the freezer, put it in bags, wrapped the bags in towels, and made sure he put those homemade ice packs on the worst-looking bruises.

"My daddy says you don't put the ice right on it because it can hurt your skin," Susie was explaining as Danny came in. "I got a big bruise when I fell off my horse, and he showed me how to take care 'a stuff."

Matt let out a breath that said he had long ago given up on fighting the girls and then, clearly addressing Danny, said, "Not a word."

"Oh, no, why would I say something about this?" Danny laughed.

"Listen—"

"If we'd known this was what it took to get you to—"

"Shut up, Danny."

Danny snickered, even as the younger Bishop sister came over to see their latest visitor, and Katie beamed up at him. "Are you a friend'a Matt's?"

Danny crouched down to her level. "Sure am," he said. "I'm Danny. What's your name?"

"Katie!" She bounced on her toes happily. "You look kinda like my big brother. Didja know that?"

"O...kay." Danny shook his head at her. "Sure. Must be a cool big brother."

"Sometimes, I guess," Katie said with a shrug. "Even if he's a duck."

"Not sure there's a good reaction here," Danny laughed, letting Katie pull him by the hand to where Susie was working Matt over. "So, you look comfortable."

"Shut up," Matt muttered.

Danny grinned a little wider. "I didn't actually believe it when I heard it, but you're getting totally run over."

Matt's expression was incredibly dry and was more than enough of an answer, though Danny was undercut by Susie coming over to inspect him and frowning his way. "Oooh, you need an ice pack too," she informed Danny in her best "serious" voice. "You got a bruise on your arm!"

"I got it!" Katie yelled, rocketing off to the kitchen to start digging for more ice from the ice maker, which had Matt laughing outright.

"No, no, go ahead and tell me about getting railroaded," he told Danny.

"We're not running railroads. I'm gonna be a doctor," Susie told Matt severely, rolling her eyes.

"Of course you are," Danny said, still too entertained not to laugh.

Katie came skipping over with her homemade ice pack and presented it to Danny with both hands, grinning crookedly up at him. "Do you fight bad guys like my Matt?"

Danny nodded. "Yeah, I do."

"I'm gonna be an X-Man-Avenger when I get bigger," Katie informed him, watching to make sure that Danny actually put the ice on his arm before she broke into another smile and climbed up to sit next to him. "Just like my big brother."

"The duck?" Danny teased.

"Uh-huh. My Clint is gonna be an X-Man-Avenger as soon as he be's a teenager!"

"Sounds like he's got life all figured out," Danny said with a crooked smile.

"Uh-huh." Katie beamed up at him. "So're you gonna go fight bad guys with my Matt? Because he's not s'pposed to do that when he's being on rest and floods!"

"I'm fine," Matt said dryly — which just had Danny laughing that much harder.

"Nuh-uh. My daddy says you hafta drink lots and sleep lots when you been hurt real bad 'cause it helps you get better faster," Susie sang out to Matt.

Danny chuckled. "She's not wrong."

"Stay out of it."

"Can't. I've got the other one on my case, right, Miss X-Man-Avenger?" Danny teased, poking Katie in the ribs and getting her to giggle.

"I like Danny!"

"Course you do. You've only known him for, what, five minutes?" Matt shot back.

Katie grinned. "Uh-huh, and I like him!"

"No accounting for taste, then."

"Hey, I think she's got great taste," Danny laughed, clearly enjoying himself.

"Mom says I do too," Katie said, grinning up at Danny. "She says I'm trouble."

"That doesn't sound right," Danny said.

"Yeah-huh!" Katie stuck her tongue out at Danny. "I'm the best and I got the best trouble and I even got so much trouble Mom had to kill a whole Hydra dude."

Danny blinked. "That… is a lot of trouble," he said, looking toward Matt, who just shrugged as if it was normal for his godkids to bring down the wrath of their parents on Hydra's head.

"Uh-huh. My big brother? He totally also fights bad guys. There was a super evil vampire, and Mom and Dad were there, and the purple bad guy with stupid helmet face saved 'em!"

"That's… a whole story there," Danny said, shaking his head and honestly not sure how much of this was true and how much was a little girl making things up.

"Yeah, only I'm not s'posed to tell too much of it 'cause of how my big brother got hurt and got all messed up and he doesn't like talkin' 'bout it."

"He alright now?" Danny asked, wondering if he needed to do… something.

Katie nodded. "Yeah. He's okay except he's scared of doctors. It makes Dr. Blue sad."

"Matt's scared of doctors too," Danny said without missing a beat — he couldn't pass it up.

"Nuh-uh," Susie said. "I'm gonna be a doctor and he's not scared of me!"

"That's because you're the best doctor," Danny said.

"And you get goddaughter privilege," Matt said with a smirk Susie's way.

"Are you feel better?" Susie asked, her eyes wide.

"Yeah, lots better," Matt promised.

"Good." Susie leaned over to kiss his forehead. "You gotta get better 'cause I love you."

"You're just spoiled because your parents are so quick to heal," Matt said with a little laugh.

"Yeah, but that's just my mom, not my dad. I got Dr. Blue!"

"Right. How could I forget?" Matt said, smiling wider at her.

"I dunno 'cause Dr. Blue is my dad and he's the best," Susie giggled.

"Nuh-uh. My dad's the best!" Katie said.

"No, your dad is bloody," Susie said, sticking her tongue.

"It's 'cause he kicks butt!" Katie insisted.

"I don't like that part," Susie said, scrunching up her nose.

"You gotta get used to it if you're gonna be a doctor."

"I don't mind it if it's for helping."

"Daddy does help!"

"My daddy helps owies!"

"My daddy gives 'em to bad guys!"

Danny couldn't help but smirk and whisper to Matt, "I have a feeling this is a standing argument."

"What gives you that idea?" Matt asked — a second before Katie tackled her big sister.

"Oh, no reason."

Matt just smirked as the girls kept up their argument. At least they weren't trying to nurse him back to health anymore.

The next morning, Danny woke up to Katie climbing on top of him, almost nose to nose. "Are you sure you and my Clint aren't lerated?"

"Hi, Katie. Yeah, I'm sure."

"I dunno, 'cause of how your duck fluff is the same color as his duck fluff."

"My duck fluff?"

"Yeah." Katie rubbed her hands in Danny's hair. "Quack! Quack quack!"

Danny couldn't help but laugh. "Oh, I didn't know that was called 'duck fluff'."

"Well, it is."

"I stand educated."

Katie grinned and then pulled on Danny's hand. "My Matt is still all blue an' black an' stuff, and Susie says he's gotta sleep, so you gotta take me outside so we can play 'cause I'm bored and Susie just wants to read her books!"

"Oh, I didn't know that's what I was doing today."

"You gotta play with me," Katie said, nose to nose with him again.

"Can I get dressed first?"

Katie tipped her head back and let out a long groan. "Okay, fine, but you gotta be fast!"

Danny laughed and picked her up to set her down on her feet again. "I'll be fast, I promise. Can you put your shoes on for me?"

"Okay! But you gotta check they're on the right feet like my mom does!"

"I'll make sure," Danny promised, shaking his head to himself as Katie rushed out of the room and he grabbed his clothes. He almost wasn't surprised that Katie started pounding on the door before he was quite finished, but he pulled his shirt on and met her at the door. "Seriously?"

"I got my shoes!" she declared happily, pointing down at her feet — and she had them on the right feet, too. Small miracles.

Danny grinned and took Katie's hand. "We're heading out," he told Susie. "Think you can babysit Matt while we're gone?"

Susie grinned, giggled, and nodded. "Uh-huh. I'll take really good care of him!"

"I know you will," Danny said, still highly entertained as Katie dragged him outside so they could go run around. She wanted to go get some ice cream, and Danny couldn't wait to bring her back to Matt and get her sticky fingers all over everything he owned. Little bit of revenge for Matt not warning him that these girls would run his life for the foreseeable future.

It wasn't long before Katie was starting to run circles around Danny, too.

Danny shook his head as he tried to catch her before she could run too far. "Come on, Katie; we do actually have to get back."

"Are we bringing Susie ice cream too?"

"Do you think she wants it? She didn't come with us…"

Katie giggled. "You're right. She must not want any ice cream."

Danny smirked. "We'll get some for her on the way back."

Katie grinned, bouncing back and forth and giggling and singing "strawberry" over and over again — until there was suddenly a cloud of smoke around them, and Danny couldn't see Katie.

He could, on the other hand, hear her screaming words that she should not have known at that age.

Danny burst into action all at once. He know exactly who these guys were, but that didn't change the fact that he wasn't sure if the Hand was after the girls — Luke had said that they were heiresses — or if they were after him. Or maybe a little combination of both.

Thankfully, it seemed like Katie had learned well form whoever taught her how to make a scene when someone grabbed her that she didn't want to go with. There was a steady stream of kicking, screaming, and swearing that Danny could follow, and even when the sound was muffled by someone's hand over Katie's mouth, a triumphant, "Eww, you taste real bad!" told Danny that she'd bit someone too.

The net result, though, was that Danny had a clear idea of where to go — and he wasn't about to let Matt's goddaughter get snatched away by the Hand on his watch.

Matt could hear Danny heading up the apartment stairs long before he and Katie even got to the door, though he was on his feet and frowning — and waving off Susie's concern — when he realized that Danny's steps sounded halting, and he was breathing hard.

"What happened?" Matt demanded when a battered Danny let himself into the apartment with Katie in tow — and the little girl was making all sorts of concerned noises and promising to shower Danny with ice packs and Band-aids.

"Your goddaughter has some sort of neon sign above her head, Matt," Danny said as he sat down on the couch and Katie rushed off to go find her sister so they could conspire to help both of their injured friends. "You wouldn't believe how many Hand ninjas got yelled at by a little girl today."

Matt couldn't help but smirk at the way Danny described it. "Told you it's more than a babysitting job."

Danny leaned further back in the couch until his head was tipped back and he was looking at the ceiling and listening to the Bishop girls conspiring to keep the two Defenders in good supply of "rest and flu-ds." "How long do you have them, again?"

"Couple weeks, give or take."

"And who usually runs this circus?" Danny shook his head. "They're practically in constant danger…"

"Yeah, and they usually live with the X-Men — or the Avengers during the summer…"

"You don't do anything halfway, do you?" Danny chuckled.

Matt smirked. "What would be the fun in that?"