SORRY, SORRY, SORRY! MY MUM WENT INTO HOSPITAL AND I WENT TO YORK WHICH IS A 7 HOUR DRIVE FROM WHERE I LIVE AND. Please don't hurt me D: ! Also I wrote this to Jar of heart which made me cry! Please listen to it it's beautiful~ I watched this AVM about 25 times! h t t p : / / w w w . y o u t u b e . c o m / w a t c h ? v = R 0 r o B H 1 u t A I & N R = 1
Okay I wanna do shout out's so I am! I feel special for getting 5 reviews~ Okay thanks: DGrayManFanatic, " " (They had no name but thanks xD), yu-Mango (I was eating mango when I read this review xD ), sathreal, Joybug, Bluelove22 and Heterochrimia Eyes Thanks so much~ Okay here it is.
ALSO! "This sort of writing is Allen thinking" KAY! Done here it be! This amazingly /not/ so awesome chapter!
"Allen... I'm sorry b-but you have cancer" There was a uncomfortable silence in the room for a second before the younger opened his mouth then closed it then opened it again in a fish like motion before keeping it open. The figure in the back of the room with red hair stood there in shock not moving a mussel. "Allen?" Komui asked trying to get him to answer. "Cancer?"
Have you ever felt like you where sinking deeper and deeper into despair?
Like your drowning in murky water just waiting to be saved?
I was like that, the moment when you get told bad news like me getting cancer, your mind thinks at 100mph and you don't know what to do?
"Allen" Komui asked gently.
I just want to be hugged and told I won't die. But that won't happen will it?
I wonder what's going to happen to me, to everyone when I die?
"Lavi. Come out... " Komui said getting up from the place beside Allen. Lavi moved out of his spot against the wall and walked over to where Allen was laying "A-Allen" He said unsure of what to do. His best friend just got told he had cancer... he felt like he should kiss him and tell him he'll be alright. But best friends aren't supposed to do that are they?
The feeling of been loved by someone. Will I ever get to feel it?
I deserve love, don't I? Haha maybe I won't... that's just a silly dream...
He looked at the younger boy with a blank face and sighed "Allen... are you okay?" Lavi asked the quiet boy.
No reply.
I wonder if they will stop me going on missions.
Will I just be a burden to everyone?
He looked at him with worried eyes and took him into a tight warm embrace. 'S-someone's h-hugging me. It's so warm, so caring, so... so ... loving is the only word.' Allen hugged back gripping onto the others shirt with a deadly grip. The younger boy looked up to see he was in the red heads arms. "L-Lavi?" Allen whispered so only Lavi could hear.
"Yes Allen." He whispered back as Komui slipped out the room."Lavi... you're so warm.." Allen answered holding on tighter. Lavi's heart skipped a beat at hearing that. "No where only friends... friends are supposed to support each other like this right? Maybe I'm just in love with him. Finding out someone might never smile at you again. It makes my heart hurt. I think I like Allen...but Allen would never like me so" Lavi thought as he rubbed circles on Allen's back to try and calm him down.
These feelings, ones he couldn't recognise swirling in his chest. It was warm, caring and it was one of loving nature. It made him wants to protect him, look after him, and hold him. Make him feel loved. It suddenly hit him like a ton of bricks "I-I love you?" He thought as he held the boy closer. He rested his head on the younger one's head breathing in his scent.
"L-Lavi..."Allen said sniffling a bit.
"Yes" Lavi said telling him to go on.
"A-am I going to... die?" Allen asked tears streaming down cheeks. His eye's where puffy and red from crying.
"Allen..." Lavi said in a sad tone. "I promise you will, I'll take you to do all your favourite things and we will have so much fun."Lavi didn't know whether Allen would live or die. But it hurt just thinking about life without him.. who would he annoy Kanda with
"Lavi... I-I feel l-lonely." He whispered clinging to him."He's never been like this has he? I-I feel so sorry for him. I want to help him...but what can I do?" Lavi held him close and as he was about to speak he heard someone cough. He looked behind him to see Komui sitting at his desk.
"Lavi I am leaving Allen-chan in your care from now on. Please give him these pills" He held up a pack of pills."Please Stay with him at all times. I will provide you with a room with double bed to share. Please don't hurt him; he has at most 8 weeks... Please... Try your best to look after him and show him how to cope." Komui said with a sad smile. "Your room is in the generals section no.630 is the door number. I hope this will be okay for you all." Lavi looked at Allen then back to Komui.
"Okay" With that Lavi picked up the younger boy and made his way to their new room. Allen had curled up in Lavi's hold and was holding on for dear life. Sleep had overcome him and he was now in the darkness.
Is this my love or is it just kindness or pity?
Does it really matter? I'm dying. But Lavi said I wouldn't... who should I believe?
While Allen slept Lavi went to their rooms and got their clothes and other things that the other boy might want. As he walked back to their room that was on the top floor just to make his life hard. When he got back he put their stuff away and lay down on the bed next to the other teen.
Life's going to get harder from now on. Living with him while trying to work out if I have a crush on him or he's just like a brother. I wonder if he will still eat the same amount of food. I mean his innocence will need it after all. Will he still go on missions? God... My mind is so messed up at the moment. He got up looking at the other boy and went for a shower, hopefully washing away all his dread. Allen... won't live will he? It hurts knowing this but then again... I'm not supposed to feel... what happened to been a bookman?
END OF CHAPTER!
Hope you like~ I don't own -man
Please review they are made with love and I need some of that at the moment~
Hope you enjoyed and see you next week~
Love lots Dango-chan xxx
(( Re-written ))