Diary,

Watched stupid vamp make out with stupid human who looks like Casper Friendly Ghost. Not Jealous. Way prettier. Well… Maybe prettier, but she have vamp. And bit jealous. And have migraine from smiling and pretending to be fine. Vamp still expects to be best friend. Tell all about girl. Can you spell 'TORTURE'?

I can.

Loraine's Diary February 8, 2007

A few months later.

I sat at the desk in my dorm room and tried to do my homework but my roommate was blabbering about some boy. I sighed and tried harder. It really was too bad that I was so fluent at Portuguese. I could have blocked her out.

She had convinced herself, again, that she was in love with some guy. I had told her repeatedly that she'd just get hurt but she only scoffed and said I was a cold bitch. I took no offence. I was.

She kept babbling and I kept trying to ignore her. Then thankfully my phone rang. She stopped and I grabbed the phone happily. Then put it down when I saw the number. It stopped ringing and I ignored it again.

Anna, my roommate, was looking at me weirdly. And after the fifth ring she groaned and yelled at me to answer it or turn it off. I sighed and answered with false cheeriness in my voice.

"Hello?"

There was a pause at the other end of the line. "I thought you would ignore me like you've been doing for the pass couple of months."

I scoffed. "I have not been ignoring you Edward. I've just been studying. I don't possess the same photographic qualities you do when it comes to memory."

"Yes you do. You never study."

He had me there. "Well people change." I mumbled. "Is there a reason you're harassing me?"

He laughed and I almost groaned. I missed his laugh more than I'd realized.

"Yes there is. How soon can you leave Brazil?"

I rolled my eyes to the ceiling. "I have no intention of leaving anytime soon. School doesn't finish for a while."

"Hmmm. I have good news anyways. Bella and I are getting married." He sounded ecstatic.

I covered the mouth of the phone when my breathing sped up. My heart felt like it was being ripped from my chest. I was being hurled into another dimension through a black hole than was ripping me apart. Tears rolled down my cheeks without my brain giving my eyes permission to cry.

I moved my hand and gasped out. "That's gre-great Edward. I'm totally happy for you." I didn't sound like I was even to me.

"Thank you." He mumbled. "Bella wants to talk to you." Then I heard the phone ruffling. I choked on a sod when I heard Bella on the other line.

"Hi Raine." She sounded happy. And I hated her more.

"Hello Bella. Ho-How are you?"

"I'm great. How are you? How is school?"

"Fine. Fine. What is it you want to talk to me about. I have tones of homework."

"Well… I was wondering if you could make it back from school in time for the wedding. I would really like you to be a bridesmaid."

I groaned and more tears fell. I couldn't bear to see then together. Would I be able to bear seeing them getting married? I doubted it.

"Ahh when is it?" I prayed it was a date that I'd have legitimate reasons to miss. She gave me the date and I almost felt better.

"My finals finish on that day. I would never make it in time. Sorry. Hey I have to go. Con-" I took a deep breath and tried again. "Congratulations. I'm happy- Edward's happy." Then I hung up. I was gonna say 'I'm happy for you.' But I couldn't manage it. I threw the phone on the desk and moved to the bed. Again trying not to sob. But as I laid on the bed I felt the bracelet on my wrist that Edward had given me when I was 8. The day he had promised to marry me the day I turned seventeen. That day had passed and he wasn't marrying me. He was marrying Bella Swan.

The flood gates broke, so to speak, and a loud broken sob sounded in the room. Anna gasped and I heard her jump off her bed. She rushed to my bed and shook me. I cried harder. She kept asking me what was wrong. I could tell her. I couldn't get anything pass my throat even if I wanted to tell her. Which I didn't.

She crawled on the bed and hugged me muttering words that were meant to sooth and after what felt like hours crying. I fell asleep. Me, who had insomnia, slept like the dead.

I woke up to a dark room. I was wrapped in my blanket and Anna was curled on her bed sleeping deeply. I looked at the clock and realized it was way after mid night. I rose and blinked.

My vision was blurry and my eyes felt like lead. I decided to stay away from mirrors. Maybe it was fate or just bad luck but my phone rang. I looked at it beside me and picked it up. Then answered it.

"Alice?" My voice sounded croaked and rough. I cleared it and tried again. "Alice is that you?" It sounded better but not like me.

"Yeah. Are you okay Raine? We've been trying to call you all night. What happened? Edward told us he told you and that Bella asked you to be a bridesmaid. I didn't see it. I would have tried to stop him. Jazz almost attacked him and he almost gave everything away too. Your not coming home are you?"

I didn't want to lie. Not to Alice, and therefore indirectly, to Jazz. So I mumbled. "No. never."

"That's a strong word." She muttered. "You have to. Esme and Carlisle miss you. So does Emment and even Rosalie. I don't even have to mention Jazz. That's a given."

I sighed. "I can't."

"Come after the wedding then. Edward is planning to take Bella to Isle Esme and he said that if you don't come for the wedding he'll stop in Rio to check on you. They'll be gone for a long time. You can come home and decide what to do about things after that."

I laid back on the bed. "I don't know Alice. I may just leave Brazil and find some other place to go. I cant handle it. I really can't."

"You can! You've handle it for months."

"Not watching him and her get married. I fell asleep crying my heart out. I feel empty and used. I do not want to come back to forks. Don't ask me to. If Jazz wants to see me. I'll arrange to meet him somewhere once he's away form Edward. But I will not come back to forks."

I was going back to Forks.

It really was amazing how guilty Esme could make one feel with just a word. Though she had used several to wear me down. I would be back in time for the wedding. A week before the wedding actually. Then I was being transferred to a boarding school in England.

I may have taken it a little too far with that demand. But really, I wanted to be far from Forks when Edward and Bella came back form their honeymoon. One could only take so much and no more as they say.

I sighed and continued packing. It had taken Esme a week to convince me to come home and Edward had called me like a million times in this week. Alice had called too asking for advice on wedding plans, since I had helped her with Emment and Rosalie's last wedding. She wasn't doing it because she wanted to but because Edward wanted my 'input on the preparations.'

I sighed again. Well it was either that or yelling at the ceiling in frustration. And I had done that enough in the pass few days. Anna sat on her bed pouting. Then, yeah I sighed again.

"Anna. I really don't want to go. But I have to. My parents insist."

"But you are not coming back!" She tossed the pillow across the room and glared at me then turned away. "Who will I talk to now…? And who will let me copy them when I do not know anything in a test?"

I smiled slightly. "Guess you'll have to make out less and study more now huh?"

She scoffed and it seemed like she wanted to say 'As if'.
"I wish I could come back for school here. But missing finals and coming back will make things difficult. For me and my parents. It's best if I simply start fresh."

She turned to look at me again. "In London. Do you know I have never left Rio De Janiero. And you have been so many places. It is really sad."

I sat on the bed beside her. "It isn't as fun as you think. It gets lonely." I pulled off my Bracelet; the one Edward had given me. "This is my favorite Bracelet."

She gapped at me. "You have never taken that off! And it looks expensive."

"I love it. So I never take it off. I'm leaving you with this. I'll be back to get it. So we'll see each other again. You have my number I have yours. We'll keep in touch and whenever you need something don't hesitate to call me. Okay?" I handed her the bracelet and she took it hesitantly.

I felt naked without it's silent but heavy weight on my hand. It hadn't moved in more than seven years. But I felt good. One less thing to remind me of what would never be. I would come back for it, I decided, if only as an excuse to see an old friend. I stood and smiled at her.

"My flight leaves in an hour. I have to leave for the airport now. I'll call you as soon as I get to Forks."

She nodded looking down at the bracelet. I sighed looking at it too. It really was a beautiful piece. Worth every penny that he had paid for it.

Moving back to my suitcase I hurriedly finished packing and ran to Anna. I gave her a hug and we said our goodbyes then I ran out to catch my taxi. I hated being late. And I was expected to take this flight out of Brazil to make it to the far side of the other hemisphere by morning.

A lot of hours later, what felt like days, passed. I was finally in Forks again. After months away, to preserve my sanity, I was back in the little town. I sighed and after checking out made my way to the parking lot. I stood and looked around. No Edward. I silently thanked who ever was looking out for me. I stopped praying when I saw that it wasn't Alice or Jazz or Emment or even Rose that was picking me up. It was Bella.

I held the handle of my suitcase tightly and my breathing became shallow again. She was walking towards me. The hood of her jacket down, it wasn't raining, and she was smiling slightly. She didn't like me much. She simply tolerated me.

"Hi Raine." She said as she stopped before me, like five feet away.

I swallowed and smiled but my face felt strained and tight. "Hi Bella. What are you doing here?"

"Well… Um Emment and Rose had to hunt. Alice and Jazz are out of town and Edward is helping Carlisle. Esme is dealing with some…" She stopped and blushed. "Wedding plans."

I grimaced and pulled my suitcase towards her. "Where's your car? It's a merc isn't it?"

She blinked at me. "Edward asked me what kind I thought was best." I shrugged and walked towards the most expensive looking car in the lot. And there it was. The Mercedes I had told Edward to get Bella. It was imported of course, but safe. I put my case in the back and climbed in the passenger's seat. Bella got in and stepped on the brake. The car shot forward and I swore she yelped then she rammed her foot on the brake.

I grabbed my seat belt and strapped myself in. Bella took a deep breath and gently rested her foot on the pedal. The car shot forward easily and I held onto the side of my seat. I was scared now and I wouldn't be okay until I got to the house.

Bella drove slowly and I began to relax a little. Then a series of events passed that was more confusing than horrifying. But then it became horrifying and catastrophic.

Bella turned her head to the side. Apparently she had seen something running in the forest. Three seconds passed but we were going around a corner.

"Bella!" I yelled and her head swerved towards me then to the front and she stepped on the gas just before we hit the tree. I looked towards her and tried to mutter something but my voice was stuck in my throat. I croaked and she turned to look at me then her head swerved to her side. Maybe it was my expressing or it was instinct but she screamed mere moments before I heard the sound of metal scrunching against metal.

Then I didn't see anything. And neither did she.