A/N: Thanks for the reviews! I appreciate all of them! –hands cookies- Sorry if this chapter wasn't what you expected.

"Mou, Fran-chan! Just do it! It can be anything~!"

"Anything?", the green-haired boy lit up slightly (though still remaining stoic).

"Yup! Anything you feel like writing!", Lussuria confirmed, smiling.

Oh, what a huge mistake that was.

The Varia's Daily Diary

Entry 2:

How to annoy the Varia members.

28th Jan.

.

I'm writing this entry because I want to teach you, the future Varia, something useful. And not because I was threatened. With rape. I swear.

Moving on, I am about to teach you something of grave importance which may lead you to the right path in life –ways to annoy the Varia members.

Though I'm not sure if they'd last that long, it's better to be safe than sorry.

Warning: Doing any of the following may/will result in death.

Boss – Not recommended. I didn't do a thing to him. If you do try, you'd either become a legend or a pile of ashes.

Levi – Easy target. Go with something 'Bossu'-related.

"Hey, Moustache-senpai", I greeted in my usual monotone, walking up to him.

"What, brat?"

"I've got news from Boss."

"F-From Bossu?"

I could literally feel the sparkles around him. Freaky.

"Yeah."

Cue awkward silence.

"Aren't you gonna tell me what it is?"

"What?"

"The news!"

"What news?"

"The news from Bossu!"

"Oh."

Cue more awkward silence.

"TELL ME ALREADY!"

"Boss is getting married."

...

Let's just say the rest of the week was relatively… interesting.

Squalo – Just as easy of a target as Levi, but much more dangerous. Try something hair-related, and make sure you're out of stabbing range.

"Long-haired commander", I called from the other side of the bathroom door.

'VOII! WHAT THE HELL DO YOU WANT?"

"What're you doing?"

"I'M IN THE TOILET, DAMN IT!"

"Yeah, but what're you doing?"

"WHY THE HELL IS IT YOUR BUSINESS?"

"Oh, you're washing your hair."

"HELL NO! NOW JUST SHUT THE FUCK UP AND LEAVE!"

"Don't lie, commander."

"VOII! I'M NOT LYING, DAMN IT!"

"Sure."

Apparently, he didn't get my sarcasm and just remained silent.

"Hey, commander."

"YOU'RE STILL THERE?"

"Do you use Sunsilk?"

…

Something I learned from that experience: Commander's sword can stab through doors.

Belphegor – Easy target, but not recommended. Fake-prince-senpai already stabs people before they even say anything. If you feel suicidal, go ahead and try something crown-related.

"Senpai", I started, entering the lounge.

"Ushishishi~ What do you want, Froggy?"

"Why do you wear a tiara?"

Crack.

Senpai broke the TV remote he was holding. Uh-oh, not a good sign.

"Ushishishi~ What did the Frog just say?"

Risking my life, I lifted my index finger and pointed at his 'crown', "Tiara. 'Nuff said."

Now, I'm really glad I'm a fast runner.

Lussuria – 'Mother' (will also respond to 'Mama' or 'Luss-nee') of the Varia. Rather hard to annoy. Try something. Anything.

I didn't really plan this one out. I was walking to the lounge when I saw Luss in the kitchen.

"Senpai", I started, "What'cha doin'?"

"Ohh~! Why, hello there, Fran-chan!", he greeted, dropping his bowl of something while rushing to me.

He glomped me (which scars me to this day) and continued, "I was just cooking a lil' something for dinner! Would you like to help?"

"Sure."

He brought me to the table and asked me to help peel some onions while he prepared everything else.

I picked up one of the round onions while thinking of a way to annoy him.

Suddenly, it hit me.

Or it hit him, to be exact.

I threw the onion at the poor sap.

"O-ow!", Lussuria yelped, turning to me.

"I'm sorry. My hand slipped."

"It's okay~! Accidents happen!"

I could feel myself smirk.

I threw it at him again.

And again.

And again. –You get the picture.

"F-Fran-chan! I think you should leave…"

He wasn't exactly annoyed, but at least I didn't have to peel onions.

Fran – You can't annoy me. My heart's made of stone.

Troll. Pretty much my whole identity. That is all.

End of Entry 2. Tell me who you think should write Entry 3! :]

Special thanks to ShiroiSuna for pointing out my mistakes! (By the way, I just noticed I forgot about Levi in chapter 1 8D)

-Plastic Petals.