Title: Kinks
Summary: Ten one-shots involving various kinks and positions...
Warnings: Oh God, run! Seriously, there will be no fluff, no cuddling, just hardcore nailing. Perverts will appreciate this.
Disclaimer: I highly doubt I even own the idea for this...
KITCHEN/FOOD KINK (More dialogue than details.)
"Banana?" Vincent asked before holding up the yellow fruit and wiggling it slightly, a devious smirk on his face.
"I ain't gettin' fucked by a goddamn fruit!" Cid snapped before flipping off the brunette. "Well, unless ya consider yerself to be fruity." His blue eyes narrowed as the gunner held up a carrot. "No goddamn vegetables, either! Fuck! Can't ya do what more girlfriends do an' suck whipped cream off my dick?"
"Girlfriend?" Vincent asked as he smirked dangerously while picking up the pilot's bear-shaped bottle of honey. "And how many girlfriends have you had suck your dick, Chief?"
"'Ey now, Vince, be careful with that!" Cid said as he sat up on the table, bare skin sticking to the metal in the dry heat. "That's my tea honey!"
"Hmm, true... And I would not want to get your wonderful hole all sticky, would I?"
"Yer such a goddamn perv!"
"Of course," the gunner chuckled as he put down the jar of honey, leaning down and kissing the blonde deeply before murmuring. "So how many girlfriends?"
"Vince!"
"Fine, don't tell me," the gunner added smugly. "I will get the answer sooner or later," he muttered with promise as he toyed with the blonde's hair. "Oil?"
"Fuck no! That shit takes forever to clean up!"
"Crisco, then?"
"Does my ass look like a piece of chicken that needs to be fried? Fuck no!"
"Fine," the gunner added before pulling back. "Turn around and bend over the table. No peeking, Captain."
"Bossy som'bitch," the blonde muttered as he followed the brunette's commands, listening as the gunner opened the door to the refrigerator and pulling something out. Paper crinkled before he listened to the brunette slurping on something. Frowning slightly, the pilot continued to listen to Vincent as the taller man's hot fingers spread his lower cheeks and revealing his entrance. "HOLY FUCK!" Cid screamed in surprise when something frozen and long entered him. It was not as thick as the brunette was and made the pilot clench tightly around the freezing object. "Did ya just shove a popsicle up my ass?"
"That I did," Vincent replied arrogantly as he gripped the wooden stick with his metallic fingers, pumping the frozen treat rapidly and making sure to hit the writhing and furious blonde's prostate with every movement. "Now, be good and focus on coming."
"It's fuckin' cold!" Cid hissed.
"Were you not just complaining about the heat?"
"Fuck ya!"
"Mm, so vocal," the gunner practically purred before leaning down and pressing a soft kiss to the pilot's shoulder. "The sooner you come, the sooner it will be removed and something bigger will take its place. Besides, we would not want you to get splinters, correct?" he taunted while pressing his erection against the pilot's ass.
"Ngh! Ya fuckin' suck!"
"Think you could take more, Chief?"
"Think ya can fuckin' survive a week without gettin' laid?"
"I managed thirty years," Vincent replied before reaching around the shorter man and stroking his hard cock rapidly, quickly working the blonde to the edge and smirking when the blonde came. Removing the popsicle, he held up the almost completely melted treat to the blonde's lips, smirking at the sight of the blue fluids that covered his opening and thighs. "Would ya care to finish the rest?"
"Yer a fuckin' sick freak, Vince!" Cid said as he smacked the popsicle away.
"True. ...What would you prefer next? A rolling pin?"
"Get fucked!"
Review for more.
Thanks for reviewing:
reloudypie: That I am! Nope, these are all Valenwind. Why? Would you like a different collection of smut for a different pairing?
mizperceived: Aww, I freaking love you, too! Heh, we call them PREverts (thank you Jackass!).
Inuobsessed004: Uhh...Gally meaning Galian, right? i.e. Galian fucking Cid? It could be done!
lo: Aww, thanks!
Caerbear: Aww, thanks!
ABNORMAL2110: Indeed; brace yourself!
MayaDarkling: Heh, no problem, my fellow pervert!
Dreadful Virtue: Aww, thanks!