DEAD POETS ARE NOT MINE. I WISH THEY WERE, BUT THEY'RE NOT. THE POEMS INCLUDED ARE MY OWN. THEY ARE ALL UNTITLED AND WRITTEN FOR THIS STORY.

The amount of work was already staggering. It seemed like the day would never end. Finally it was time for the last class of the day: English. We followed Mr. Keating to the main hallway by the trophy case. After explaining that we must 'Carpe diem' and make the most of life, I knew English would be my favorite class.

I had finished my homework and desperately needed to shower. There was no female shower so I had Charlie and Neil make sure no one was in there. Only Todd, who finished quickly and didn't even look at me. I finished my shower and dressed. I went to my room and got out my sketchbook. I sketched absentmindedly until I heard Charlie come back from his study group. I glanced down at my sketch and saw that I had drawn a familiar looking boy kissing a girl; only the girl was obviously beautiful.

I put my book away and got in bed. Charlie put on his pajamas and got in his own bed. I turned to him and asked, "Charlie? Do you think I'm pretty?"

He looked at me and said, "Of course you are. What makes you think you aren't? Who told you that you weren't?"

I just shrugged. I didn't want to tell him that I was upset Todd had ignored me, but I knew that he would find out so I told him. He visibly relaxed and told me that Todd was new and it would take him some time to open up to us. "Besides, I don't think I'll have to mutilate the quiet one."

I told Charlie goodnight and dreamt of screaming babies and being chased by annuals telling me I'd only be good as a housewife, not an artist. I jerked awake and hurriedly dressed and sat on my bed waiting for Charlie to get up.

Neil passed by the room, saw me on my bed and motioned for me to come with him. I followed him and saw Todd not too far ahead. I didn't say much as I went through the day, waiting for Mr. Keating's class. When it finally arrived, we ripped out the introduction of our texts and were told to 'contribute a verse' in the play that is life. Man, I loved that class.

At dinner, Neil brought Mr. Keating's senior annual to our table. Neil and Charlie wanted to know what the Dead Poets Society was and so we found Mr. Keating afterwards to question him. The club was right up my alley. Poetry? Sucking the marrow out of life? I had always written poetry and sketched, so I loved the idea of sharing my verse. Charlie had never read what I wrote, simply because I didn't want him to feel I resented him or had serious problems about our parents 'fair' treatment of me.

I prepared a poem and secretly asked Neil to read it sometime that night. I was much too frightened to read it myself I told him that I would signal him when he could.

We managed to get to the Indian Cave and start the meeting without too much fuss. After Charlie read a poem by Abraham Cowley off of a nude picture, I nodded to Neil. He stood and said, "Andrew Dalton."

I avoided everyone's gaze as he read it.

"I trust myself no more;

Emptiness surrounds me.

I throw my feelings out the door.

Everyone will live without me.

The shadow of another pushes me away

Into the darkness where I must stay."

Neil looked up from the paper, shocked. Everyone was silent. Todd looked at me and said, "That was beautiful" without stuttering or stammering.

I blushed and stared at him, and almost forgot the 6 other people in the cave, including my overprotective little brother. His green eyes were so hypnotizing that I jumped when Neil started to read Tennyson. The rest of the meeting was a blur. I must've started to doze while walking because I was suddenly lifted and carried back to school.

I woke up to Charlie looking at me. I ignored his gaze and dressed for class. Charlie just said "Talk to him" and walked out. I took that as his approval.