-1Author's Notes: First of all, thank you to those who reviewed. I'm glad you all enjoyed this. This chapter starts off with everyone in their first period classes. Wendy, Kyle, Henry Tinklewater, and Cartman (yes, Cartman) are all in English. Stan and Kenny are in biology, and Bebe is in math…Algebra I, to be exact. Also, though I was pretty sure that Stan and Wendy had never kissed, I looked it up…and I was right. I guess they did kiss a few times in "Flashbacks", but those were, well, flashbacks if you remember right, so they don't count. There were several times when you thought they would kiss, but they never did because Stan always puked on her. If you want to get technical, Cartman was Wendy's first kiss because of the whole sexual tension thing in "Chef Goes Nanners". I don't really see that as her first kiss, though…she was eight. And I am twelve different kinds of sorry for not posting this sooner…this semester has been insane so far. I promise that updates will be more regular from now on!

Wendy tried to get to English as early as she possibly could. This was not an easy feat, and by the time she did find the class, the bell was about to ring. She was hoping that she would be able to sit as far away from Henry as possible. Homeroom had been both awkward and frustrating because Henry had snuck several glances at her, most of them directed towards her chest. Wendy didn't appreciate that at all. The only thing that made Wendy more upset than people fucking with her was being objectified. He had eventually stopped staring and decided to try to make small talk, but she basically ignored him, only telling him why she hadn't been at Honors Day Camp and agreeing with him that the school was huge. Once the bell rang, she had literally ran out of the classroom to avoid further discussion with him. Now she sat in the desk, watching the door intently and praying like Hell that Henry would somehow not be in her class.

"Wendy?" Kyle said as he took a seat next to her. He looked concerned. "You okay?"

"Huh?" Wendy replied, turning to Kyle.

"You look sort of…I don't know. Weird." Kyle said, frowning.

"I'm fine." Wendy replied, going back to watching the door.

"Are you looking for someone or something?"
"What? No." Wendy replied quickly.

"No?" Kyle said, raising his eyebrows.

"Okay, fine. I AM looking for someone, but it isn't because I like them or any weird reason like that." she replied, sighing.

"Are you sure? Usually you don't look for someone if you dislike them." Kyle replied, looking at her like he knew something that she didn't.

"I'm positive. I want to avoid him as much as possible." she replied, shuddering as she said this. Wanting to avoid him was a bit of an understatement…but hiring hit men got expensive after awhile, and people had started asking questions the last time.

"Who is it, anyway? It takes a lot for you to hate someone." Kyle replied. He knew that Wendy had hated Cartman that much in elementary school, but they mostly left each other alone now. As far as he knew, anyway.

"His name is Henry Tinklewater." Kyle snorted when she said this. Tinklewater WAS a weird last name.

"Wait, is he that guy from North Park? The one you're dating?"

"He WAS that guy from North Park that I was dating. Now he's my annoying ex-boyfriend."

"Aha. Well, I guess it makes sense for you to hate him, then."

"I would like him just fine if he would leave me alone."

Wendy and Kyle's conversation was interrupted by the sound of the classroom door slamming. Everyone in the room stopped what they were doing and looked towards the front of the room. A woman whom they assumed was their teacher was standing there, class roster in hand. The woman looked like she was about twenty-four or so. If Cartman had been there, he would have taken one look at her and called her a dirty goddamn hippie. The woman had shoulder length curly brown hair, green eyes, and plenty of freckles. She wore frayed jeans, a tunic with an African tribal print on it, red and yellow beaded earrings, and red beaded flip flops. She looked more like a student than a teacher. The woman looked down at her list and then back up at the class and smiled. "Sorry about that door slam. I had to get your attention somehow." she said, looking at her list again. "I've done a head count here, and it seems as if we're still missing a few people. We'll give them a few more minutes to find the room and then we'll get started." she said, sitting down at her desk and pulling out a book.

Ten minutes later, everyone had found their way into the classroom. Despite Wendy's prayers, Henry was indeed in the class. Cartman had also somehow found his way into the class as well, which was just weird. Wendy wondered what kind of persuading he had had to do in order to get into an honors class. She knew he wasn't in the Honors Program…or at least she hoped he wasn't. Then again, she HAD missed the Honors Day Camp…technically it was her fault that she didn't know. Fortunately, Kyle seemed just as confused as Wendy.

"What the hell, fatass?" Kyle demanded, looking both confused and a little pissed.

"Kyle, must we always play these childish insult games?" Cartman replied, sighing.

"Whatever. How the fuck did you manage to get into this class?"
"I have my ways, Jew. Namely standardized tests."
"Bullshit. There's no way you scored high enough to get into this class."
"Oh, but there is. Face it, Jew. I'm smarter than you are."
"No fucking way."

Their conversation was interrupted by yet another slam of the door. Cartman jumped about twelve feet in the air and glared at the teacher. She simply grinned at him and pulled out the roster once again. She silently counted the students on the roster and the students in the class and grinned when her class was finally full. She took a seat on top of her desk and crossed her legs. The class stared at her expectantly.

"Okay, guys. Sorry about the delay. Anyway, my name is Ms. Dawson, but I would really rather be called by my first name…Prudence. And before you ask, yes, I am named after the song by The Beatles. I also have two sisters named Eleanor and Lucy and a brother named Maxwell. And our dog growing up was named Sergeant Pepper. My parents were and still are huge Beatles fans." she said, grinning. Everyone stared at her for a second, not sure what to make of this situation. No one was used to teachers talking to them like this.

"Wait wait wait…this is some kind of trick, right? They planted this hippie here to see how we would react." Cartman said, laughing. Prudence just stared at him.

"No, I'm afraid not. I'm your English teacher. Now, I thought that maybe you might want to know a little bit about me. I'm originally from Philadelphia. My parents moved us to St. Louis when I was twelve, and they still live there. I'm the second oldest of my siblings…my sister Lucy is three years older than me. My parents are both lawyers, my sister Lucy just finished law school, and my brother Max is a freshman pre-law major at Ohio State right now. I got my bachelor's degrees from NYU in American Lit and Brit Lit. Double majoring is no picnic, let me tell you. I got my master's degree from Berkeley in comparative literature, and here I am. I'm not married, I have three dogs, and I just moved to the Denver area." she said, smiling at everyone. Wendy couldn't help but raise her hand.

"Ms…er…I mean Prudence?"
"Yes…uh…?"
"Wendy."
"Yes, Wendy?"
"If you have so many degrees why are you teaching here?"

"Because it was the best job I could get to put myself through law school." Prudence replied, grinning.

"But why in God's name would you pick a place like South Park?" Kyle asked.

"This isn't South Park…" Prudence replied, giving him a weird look.

"Yeah, you stupid Jew. I told you I'm smarter." Cartman replied, grinning.

"I won't tolerate hate speech in here." Prudence said, glaring at Cartman. Cartman just rolled his eyes in response.

"Excuse me, Mr. McCormick?" Stan and Kenny's biology teacher, Mrs. Kaufman said, trying to get Kenny's attention. Kenny was slumped over on one of the lab tables, not moving. If you didn't know Kenny, you would think he was simply sleeping. Stan knew better, however.

"He's not sleeping." he said, making the teacher turn around to look at him.

"Not sleeping? Then what else could he possibly be doing?" she said, a sarcastic smile playing upon her lips.

"He's dead." Stan replied. The entire class gasped in response, and Mrs. Kaufman frowned.

"Young man, death is not something to joke about." she said, glaring at him.

"I'm not joking! Kenny dies all the time!" he replied.

"That isn't possible." Mrs. Kaufman replied, talking to Stan as if he were a small child.

"Feel his pulse, then." Stan replied. She did, and frowned when she couldn't find one. The class watched as she felt every possibly pulse point in his body and failed to find one each time.

"Oh my God! Someone call the nurse! Call 911!" she screamed frantically. The class scurried around, looking for the phone.
"No." Stan replied, annoyed.

"No? Young man, this boy is dead. We have to try to fix this!" Mrs. Kaufman screamed.

"I told you. He dies all the time. Just leave him alone and he'll be back by the end of the period." Stan replied. The teacher just gave him another dirty look and continued to scream at the rest of the class. Stan sighed and held his hand to the bridge of his nose. Kenny didn't appreciate it when people made a big fuss over his deaths. Besides, the morgue wouldn't come out to get him anyway. They knew that Kenny died several times per week, and they had stopped coming after him once fifth grade rolled around. Kenny usually came back halfway to the morgue, anyway. Gas was expensive these days, and no one liked making unnecessary trips.

"Ah, dude, what the hell?" Kenny said, sitting up and shaking Mrs. Kaufman's hands off of him. She screamed when he moved, and he just gave her a weird look. The rest of the class stared at each other with raised eyebrows, wondering what kind of prank Kenny was trying to pull.

"You…you're talking." Mrs. Kaufman said incredulously.

"Yeah…" Kenny replied, shrugging. Mrs. Kaufman frowned.

"Was that supposed to be some kind of prank, young man?" she asked, putting her hands on her hips.

"What?" No!" Kenny replied, afraid to get in trouble.

"You couldn't have just died, Mr. McCormick. That does not happen." Mrs. Kaufman said, still glaring.

"No, I really did. I do that all the time. You'll see." Kenny responded, grinning.

"You think this is funny? You nearly gave me a heart attack. Those kinds of pranks are neither funny nor appropriate." she replied, rubbing her temples as if she were suffering from a bad headache.

"It wasn't a prank!" Kenny practically yelled.

"Mr. McCormick, perhaps you should go explain this to the principal. I have neither the time nor patience to deal with this today." she replied, pointing towards the door.

"But…" Kenny tried to defend himself, but she cut him off.

"Now, Mr. McCormick." she said, this time opening the door. Kenny rolled his eyes and left. Stan just laughed.

After Prudence had gone through a short lecture about why Cartman shouldn't insult those who were different from him, she took roll and assigned seats. Luckily, Prudence didn't sit them alphabetically like most teachers would. Instead, she put everyone by people that she thought they had a "certain vibe" with. Wendy thought that it was sort of weird, but she wasn't next to Henry and therefore couldn't complain. She was, however, between Kyle and Cartman. She had been friends with Kyle for quite awhile, especially since Bebe had developed a crush on him back in sixth grade. They weren't best friends, but they still talked a lot. She didn't really mind sitting next to Kyle. Cartman, however, was a totally different story. His attitude had seemed to undergo a minor make-over when he lost his weight, and he mostly left her alone. They had even worked on a social studies project together in January of eighth grade. They had somehow managed not to kill each other during their time working together, and they had even developed a fragile sort of friendship. Of course it had died around the time that Wendy and Henry had officially started seeing each other, but it was a start. Wendy smiled at Cartman, but he just turned away from her, muttering something about being surrounded by hippies. Wendy wasn't sure why that bothered her so much…she had gotten used to the hippie jokes, especially those that came from Eric Cartman. Somehow, though, this time was different. Perhaps she had tricked herself into believing that they were friends, or maybe she…she physically shuddered at the thought. No, that one was definitely NOT it…was it? She decided to ignore it as she turned to Kyle to talk to him.

Bebe couldn't help but notice the guy next to her. She could tell that he wasn't a freshman, but she couldn't quite understand why he was in a freshman math class. She decided that he was probably just some loser junior who had failed too many times. Still…the way his hair fell into his eyes was definitely appealing to her, and she could tell she wasn't the only one in the room salivating over him. She sighed as she studied every inch of him. His jaw line looked as if a Greek artisan had crafted it, and his eyes were two blue-green pools that she wanted to dive into. She almost laughed at herself for that one…she had definitely read one too many of her mom's trashy romance novels. He must have felt her staring because he looked up and caught her eyes. She looked down, blushing furiously. She mentally scolded herself for being so sophomoric and obvious. If she had had a chance with him at all, she had just ruined it. She looked back up, only to find his eyes still on her. She smiled nervously at him and he smiled back. She looked back down, blushing even more. She fluffed her hair, really hoping that it hadn't gone flat yet. Suddenly, she felt his breath on her neck as he leaned down to whisper in her ear. "Your hair looks fine. Stop messing with it." he said, making her shiver. Holy shit, she thought. She turned around to smile at him, and he winked at her. The rest of class was a blur for her…she mainly remembered the fact that Hot Boy had casually drummed on the back of her chair, almost putting his arm around her. When the bell finally rang, she gathered both her composure and her things before going out in the hall to find Wendy. It wasn't until three hours later that she found the note that he had apparently slipped into her purse when she wasn't looking. "I'm Nick." it read.

Stan had to admit that there were perks to the new school. The school lunch was one of them. Lunch at the elementary and middle schools hadn't been the same since Chef died, so everyone had sort of lost faith in school lunch. However, when Stan went through the lunch line, he discovered that the food looked both edible AND tasty. He bought a steak quesadilla, a side of nachos, a chocolate chip cookie, and a can of grape juice. Once he had paid, he looked around the cafeteria, hoping to see a familiar face. He spotted Bebe in the corner and decided to sit with her, hoping that his friends would find him. He took a seat across from her, briefly wondering if Wendy would sit with her. "Hey Bebe." he greeted. Bebe apparently hadn't noticed him sitting down, as she jumped about five feet in the air.

"Jesus. Hi Stan." she said, laughing at herself.

"Sorry if I scared you."

"Oh, no problem."

"So…where is everyone?"

"I texted Wendy to tell her where I was. She said she would get her food and find me." Stan grinned at this.

"Wendy is going to sit with you?"

"Yeah…" Bebe replied, shooting Stan a weird look.

"Cool. So, have you seen Kyle at all?" Stan asked, trying to change the subject.

"No. Why would I know where he is?" Bebe asked, blushing. Stan frowned. Girls were weird.

"I just thought you might have seen him somewhere…"

"Well I haven't. Why don't you text him or something?"

"Hey, that's a good idea." Stan replied, pulling out his phone.

Ten minutes later, almost everyone else had joined Stan and Bebe. Once she had figured out where Kyle was, Heidi had attached herself to his side, practically shoving Stan out of his chair. Wendy kept looking at Bebe, concerned, but Bebe seemed unphased by the entire thing. In fact, she really didn't seem to notice. Wendy couldn't decide if that was good or bad. Just as she was about to ask Bebe what was wrong, Eric Cartman slammed his tray on the table and took the empty seat next to her. She sighed, hoping that things wouldn't be awkward. Cartman removed the cellophane from his sandwich and began to eat, a smirk playing on his face. Kyle and Stan exchanged nervous glances. They knew that smirk. Stan looked around, trying to figure out who would be the target of Cartman's wrath. Kyle, however, discovered the reason for the smirk by simply glancing at Cartman's lunch tray. The cafeteria just HAD to serve apple pie that day.

About fifteen minutes after he sat down, Cartman finally got around to eating his pie. He smirked again, looking directly at Kyle. Kyle groaned inwardly. Cartman responded to this by shoving his index finger right into the middle of the slice. Everyone else watched this, amused. Cartman then proceeded to remove his finger and lick the apple filling off.

"You know, they were right." Cartman said, grinning.

"What?" Stan asked, confused.

"About third base." Cartman replied, his grin widening. Heidi snorted at this.

"Right, like you would know ANYTHING about sex." she said, laughing.

"Actually, hoe, I know a lot more than you ever will. The only fingers that ever went inside your vagina were your own." Cartman replied, glaring at Heidi.

"That is SO not true." Heidi replied, blushing.

"Anyway, as I was saying, they were right about third base in that American Pie movie." Cartman said, shooting another dirty look in Heidi's direction.

"Wait…are you saying that YOU got to third base?" Kenny asked, his eyes lighting up.

"I got farther than that." Cartman replied, grinning once again. Wendy's eyes widened at this.

"Wait…you…you had sex?" she said, shocked.

"That I did." Cartman replied.

"With who?" Bebe asked, looking around the cafeteria. "Do we know her?"

"No, I'm afraid not. She lives in Nebraska." Cartman replied.

"How did you manage to lose your virginity before I did?" Kenny asked, truly amazed. Cartman just shrugged.

No matter how hard she tried, Wendy simply couldn't make herself listen to what Señora Flannigan was saying. Even though lunch had ended two hours before her Spanish class, her thoughts kept drifting back to the conversation. She just couldn't believe that Cartman wasn't a virgin. She had always imagined that Cartman would be the last one to lose his virginity. Sure he had improved in the looks department, and while he hadn't been an outright asshole to her since eighth grade, she knew that others weren't as fortunate. She really couldn't see how Cartman could manage to get a girl to go out with him, much less sleep with him. Cartman did have a certain charm, but he mostly used it on his mother. She couldn't see him conning a girl into bed with it. Then again, Eric Cartman was pretty much capable of anything. She shook her head and tried to focus on the lesson. Obsessing about Cartman's sexual status was not exactly the most productive way to spend Spanish class. She allowed thoughts of verb conjugations to flood her brain while those of Cartman trickled out.

Unfortunately for Wendy and Bebe, Millie stayed true to her promise of a sleepover at the end of the week. Wendy didn't see the point in going, but Bebe talked her into it. Something about keeping your friends close and your enemies closer. That and her mother's insistence that she "spend more time with those nice girls in her class" were why Wendy found herself on the futon in Millie's basement, eating popcorn and listening to Anna Nalick. Wendy rolled her eyes. Bebe SO fucking owed her. Suddenly the music stopped and everyone turned to stare at Heidi. "Hey girls, how about some truth or dare?" she said, grinning. Everyone responded by gathering closer together. Wendy rolled her eyes and joined them.

"Since this is my party, I'll start." Millie said, looking around for someone to pick. She grinned when her glance landed on Red. "Red…truth or dare?"

"Um…truth." Red said, gulping. Wendy rolled her eyes.

"Who do you like?" Millie asked. Wendy winced inwardly. She knew that Red had a crush on Craig, and she was pretty sure that Millie already knew too. She would definitely use it as blackmail material when she got the chance.

"Um…well…I like…Craig. There, I said it." Red said, blushing as crimson as her hair. Millie just grinned.

"I figured as much. Now it's your turn."

The game continued on with Heidi being dared to flash Millie's creepy neighbor, Sally being forced to admit that she had a teensy crush on Kenny, Millie telling the story of her first kiss, Bebe admitting to never having been kissed, and Powder telling the tale of getting to second base with a North Park guy at the county fair. Wendy was shocked that no one had gotten to her yet. She much preferred to stay out of their stupid reindeer games, as she had come to call them. Of course, this didn't last.

"Wendy." Powder said, turning to her and grinning. Now it was Wendy's turn to gulp. She didn't even bother to mentally flog herself for being slightly afraid. Teenage girls could have mean streaks comparable to serial killers.

"Powder." Wendy replied. The trick was to keep cool. It was almost as if they fed off of insecurity.

"Truth or dare?" Powder asked. Wendy weighed the pros and cons of each one in her head, ultimately deciding that it was safer to go with truth. If they REALLY asked her anything embarrassing, she could simply deny ever having said anything about it. If it came down to her word against theirs, she knew that people would trust her more.

"Truth." Wendy replied. Powder grinned at this. Clearly she had a good question in mind.

"If you could lose your virginity to any boy in our class, who would it be?" Powder asked, giggling. The others joined in, and Bebe shot Wendy a sympathetic look. Wendy rolled her eyes.

"I really don't think any of them are doable." Wendy replied, grinning.

"That isn't an answer." Powder said, frowning.

"Fine…um…well, it would depend. I know Stan would be sweet about it, but then Kenny would be adventurous about it. Kyle obviously has the best ass, but Tweek would last a long time. Personally, I would prefer someone with a little bit of experience. We'll go with Cartman." Wendy said, hoping everyone would laugh and ignore her answer.

"Cartman?" Heidi asked, her jaw dropping.

"Yeah. I mean, he had sex with that girl over the summer, right?" Wendy said, shrugging.

"Do you actually believe that?" Bebe said, frowning.

"Actually, I do." Wendy replied.

"Gross. I so do not want to think about Cartman naked." Heidi said, making a face.

"No one wants to think about Cartman naked." Millie replied, shuddering.

"Except Wendy, of course." Sally said, winking at her.

"I can't believe you would let Eric Cartman pop your cherry." Sally said, turning to Wendy. Wendy rolled her eyes.

"You guys, please. It was a stupid question. I'm not letting any of the guys in our class pop my cherry." she replied.

"Well, I am." Heidi said, grinning.

"Who, Kyle?" Powder asked.

"Yeah." Heidi replied.

"When?" Bebe asked, frowning.

"Junior year." Heidi replied.

"Why then?" Millie asked, also frowning.

"Because the right age to start having sex is seventeen. Chef said so." Heidi replied, staring at them like they were stupid.

"How do you know that you'll still be together?" Bebe said, raising her eyebrows.

"Please, it's fate. We're going to get married after college." Heidi replied, shrugging. She thought everyone already knew that.

"Have you guys talked about this?" Wendy asked, shooting Bebe a sympathetic look.

"The sex part…" Heidi said, blushing a bit.

"Yeah, that figures." Bebe replied, snorting.

Stan jumped as the alien right next to his character exploded. Holy shit that was close. He looked back at the screen and ducked just in time, barely missing the zombie that had attempted to take a flying leap at him. He looked slightly to his left and saw a vampire coming right for him. He grabbed a stake and stabbed it right through the vampire's heart just as it was about to land on him.

"AY! Motherfucker, I was trying to help you!" Cartman screamed into his headset. "Stop fucking killing me, asshole!"

"Sorry Cartman. I forgot you were good." Stan replied, grinning to himself. Killing Cartman, even through a video game, gave him some satisfaction.

"Maybe he wouldn't kill you if you wouldn't lunge at him, dickwad." Kyle said, coming to Stan's defense.

"Maybe if you would do what you do in real life in video game world and cover his ass I wouldn't have to save him, Jew!" Cartman growled back into his headset.

"This game confuses me. Who the hell is good?" Stan said, frowning.

"You go after the angels and the scarecrows, you dumb fuck." Cartman replied.

"No you don't. You go after the zombies and the scarecrows." Kyle said.

"What about the aliens?" Stan asked.

"Green ones are bad. " Cartman replied.

"No, the green ones are good." Kyle replied.

"Kyle would say that. What is green the color of, Stan?" Cartman said.

"FUCK YOU, CARTMAN!" Kyle shouted into his headset.

"The color of money, of course. As you know, Stan, our friend Kyle is a Jew. He wouldn't dare destroy anything green." Cartman replied, a mocking tone in his voice.

"Goddammit you guys, this isn't helping!" Stan replied, confused and frustrated. He didn't know who to shoot at and who to help. He sighed as he realized that Cartman and Kyle weren't going to shut up. He reluctantly threw his controller down and sat back to listen to their battle. They had tried to play the damn zombie scarecrow vampire bullshit game at least five times since March, but Cartman and Kyle always wound up fighting over something. Stan wondered if they would ever get past the first level. He highly doubted it. He decided that waiting around was pointless because Cartman and Kyle would be bitching at each other for hours. He logged out of the game and turned his attention to his computer. He double clicked on the Internet Explorer icon and went to Myspace. He had no new messages or anything, so he clicked on Wendy's picture and navigated his way to her page. She had apparently changed some stuff around because "Rebel Girl" was replaced by "Imagine" by John Lennon. He scrolled down and noted that her background had changed from just plain pink and purple to a sweet tye-dye type of layout. She had also downgraded from a top eight to a top four. Of course, he wasn't in it. He scrolled back up and clicked on her pictures. He absolutely loved her display picture. It was a picture of her and Bebe at the eighth grade dance. Wendy was beaming in the picture, probably at the person behind the camera. Stan made a face as he remembered who Wendy had been with. That fucking toilet water guy. Henry or whatever his name was. Stan didn't even want to think about it. He decided to go to bed before he pissed himself off with thoughts of that douche. He had practice the next morning anyway.

"Wendy, are you still awake?" Bebe whispered, rolling over on her side.

"Barely. What time is it?" Wendy muttered, forcing herself to roll over and face Bebe.

"A little after one."

"Is everyone else asleep?"

"Yeah. They have been for awhile."

"Why are you still awake?"

"Just thinking."

"About what Heidi said?"

"Kind of…"

"Heidi is stupid. Kyle isn't going to have sex with her."

"He's dating her."

"Is he? His Myspace status says single."

"It does?"
"Jesus, Bebe, how do I know that and you don't?"

"What about what you said?"

"Huh?"
"About Cartman."

"I was kidding."

"Are you sure? You acted all weird when he said he lost his virginity."

"Because it's fucking Cartman."

"Do you like him or something?"

"What?"

"Do you like Cartman?"

"Where the hell did that even come from?"

"It's just a question. You don't have to bite my head off."

"Whatever, Bebe. I'm going to bed." Wendy muttered, rolling back over and pretending to be asleep. Bebe couldn't help but notice that she hadn't answered the question. Wendy noticed as well…she just chose to pretend like she had.