Naruto: Yay! We got more mail from our fans!
Sakura: It's time to read them!
From I heartSai
Sai, I love you! Please, will you go out with me?
Dear IheartSai,
I'm sorry, but I'm gay! Now, go away!
Love,
Sai
From Pokemon Ranger,
I'm a guy in case you guys are asking. I really enjoy watching Naruto. It's a good anime. Guy sensei, you have a weird taste in fashion! Just what
the fuck are you wearing? Someone can mistake you for a vegetable! And Lee, why do you admire your sensei so much? I mean.. Come on! Tenten and Neji don't look like idiots, but you do!
Dear Pokemon Ranger,
Guy: For your information, I have good sense of style! It's my Guy suit! It's very
popular! Did you know that Lady Gaga wear my Guy Suit? It's amazing to see a woman
admire my fashion!
Lee: I just really love my teacher.. He means everything to me!
Guy: (crying) Do you mean that Lee?
Lee: ( sobbing) Yes, I do!
Guy: I love you, Lee..
Lee: I love you to Guy sensei..
( They hugged each other and a sunset appeared out of nowhere..)
Tenten: Very awkward!
Love,
Guy and Lee
From Be with me or I kill you!
Sasuke , I just wanted to tell that if you ever needed to commit suicide I'm here for you. I know you like to cut yourself, but you can change my friend. Shino-kun, how do you sleep with bugs crawling inside and outside of your body? Naruto, have you heard of a sandwich? It's delicious!
Dear Be with me or I kill you!
Sasuke: I'm not suicidal! I didn't cut myself on purpose! I had a paper cut! Then I accidently, jumped off that cliff cuz I saw some yaoi fans!
Shino: It's very easy.. I imagine beautiful naughty girls touching me in a dirty way.
Naruto: A sandwich? Is that for fancy people? I'm not rich, thank you very much! I prefer to eat
at least 10 bowls of ramen a day! Does that answer your damn question?
Love,
The boys
From Big Bang Fan
Itachi, your hair is long and pretty! What shampoo do you recommend me to use? Kakashi, are you a pervert? Kisame, not to be mean or anything, but will you get mad if I eat fish sticks and anything fish-related?
Dear Big Bang Fan,
Itachi: It's not my real hair… (takes off his hair) it's a wig! I'm actually bald. And I don't
use shampoo either….
Kakashi: (shakes his head) No, silly! Stop reading the People's magazines.. You know they
tell lies and rumors… (watches a porno movie)
Kisame: ( pouts) Hell yeah, I will be upset! Those are my brothers that you are eating!
Love,
The guys
From Minato Fangirl
Minato, I mean Lord Yondaime, sir… I own Naruto Ultimate Ninja 3, 4, and 5 because I love you so much… I admire you skills as a ninja.. You are very attractive. You're definitely my type.. but the thing that is bothering me the most is that you don't speak when you are doing the jutsus in the games. You just smile and show your teeth when I look at the figures in the Naruto collection.. I'm very curious to know why you won't speak to me, my love?
Dear Minato Fangirl,
Yondaime: …. …. …..
Naruto: The dots that you see on the this paper is Morse Code… So I will have to translate for you…
Yondaime: …. …. …..
Naruto: He said the reason why he can't speak it's cuz he went to the men's restroom Hooter's and he saw three guys in a threesome and he lost his voice forever and his eyesight. He is wearing contacts..
Love,
Yondaime and Naruto
From Ichigo Kurosaki
Hey, guys! It's me! Ichigo Kurosaki the substitute soul reaper! Anyway, Naruto.. I noticethat Hinata really loves you, but you are oblivious to notice her.. Sakura, you know Sasuke don't like you, so why do you keep chasing after him? And Sasuke.. You love your older brother, don't you? You guys shouldn't be fighting!
Dear Ichigo Kurosaki,
Naruto: What does oblivious mean? It must mean very smart.. Well, duh! I'm smart! Yeah,
I knew about Hinata's feelings.. Why do you think we are friends?
Sakura: Girls likes guys who treat them like crap.
Sasuke: (smirks) I don't love him. I hate him! ( cries) Itach is a meanie! he won't add me as a friend on Twitter… Every time, I try to send him a message he reports me to the staff that I'm a sex offender….
Love,
Team 7
From Yaoi girl,
Hi, Sasuke and Naruto! What did you guys think about your first kiss?
Dear Yaoi girl,
Sasuke;( frowns) That was horrible! I have nightmares about that kiss and it keeps
haunting me… Somehow, someone keeps sending me some yaoi manga books in the mail…
Naruto: Yeah, what he said! (In his mind) That was the best kiss of my life.. It was so
wonderful! His lips were so cold, but I felt my heart beat faster…and my face was red like a tomato….
Sasuke: (staring at Naruto) I hope you aren't thinking about any gay thoughts about me and you!
I'm not gay! I don't swing that way!
Naruto: That's not what you said last night!
Sasuke: O.O
Love,
Sasuke and Naruto
Please continue to send more letters!