Xander
You learn something knew everyday, they say. But what about what you don't learn. How you don't learn to just take the love of your life leaving—dying. How you don't learn how to feel after your best friends' butch-y girlfriend throws you out. Though, that one was my fault. I was just, attention was something I wanted—want. And then she fucking throws me out. Fucking Buffy didn't even do anything about it, just looked at me like I just killed her favorite pet!
Damn them all! They should be feeling for me! But not even Willow would take me in, mostly because of Kennedy I know. But honestly, she could have put me up for some money for a hotel! No, no. Nothing for Xander. No I get patted on the back and some thanks, then everyone starts living their life like we didn't lose people!
I could hurt them! I could kill them………….I couldn't. Faith couldn't either, or else Buffy, Willow, me, all of us would be dead. Damn.
"Can I get another!" The bartender glared at me with yellow eyes and made a noise that I took as a yes when he slammed a new glass, full to the brim, of alcohol in front of me.
I think I'm grudgingly happy for them, I mean…Buffy actually has happiness. Willow has finally gotten over Tara enough to have a lover. And even Dawn's in college now, dating from what I hear from Willow when I talk to her.
"Hey sexy. You want to come back to my place?" I turn and look into light brown eyes. I finish the burning liquid, smile and hope I don't slur.
"Sure." She takes my hand and leads me out of Willy's. She winks over her shoulder to me. If I squint just right, my alcohol fogged mind will say she looks just like my Anya. If I place my hands perfectly, my alcohol hazed mind will tell me she is my Anya. And if I mount her just like this, my alcohol swept mind will tell me she is my Anya.