A/N:

I hope you enjoy, and please listen to the below song while reading the entire story. It helps.

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"All I know is that you're so nice
You're the nicest thing I've seen
I wish that we could give it a go
See if we could be something"

Kate Nash, "The Nicest Thing"

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Hot lips pushed experimentally against his own. Cautious midnight blue eyes remained open, observing him. Wide, ocher eyes glared back, in too much shock to do anything. His hands remained behind his head. His breath remained inside his body. His legs shivered with the force of with he was tensing.

He'd never been kissed like this. Not by another man. Renji wasn't sure whether to push him away or pull him closer.

Byakuya took Renji's passiveness as submission to his advances and slid his tongue against the redhead's trembling lower lip. Renji gasped in a breath and made a noise against his leader, a form of protest, but the black-haired taichou kept going, dying for a deeper taste of those soft, wet lips. He pushed his tongue inside his mouth only after thoroughly teasing him. Renji whimpered into his taichou's impellent kiss, feeling much like a fussy child held unwillingly in their parent's arms. It wasn't like he could push the man away; he was his taichou.

Or was he?

"Yeah. An' I ain't your fukutaichou any more. I resign."

"You..." he began, humor tinging his voice. "resign?"

Byakuya had even been intelligent enough to remind him of that before raping Renji's lips.

"You're saying you are no longer my fukutaichou?"

Renji sighed at the direction the conversation was heading. He looked back at the sky. "Che. What of it?"

"Then am I correct in assuming you no longer accept the laws Seireitei holds over you? That you are... free from them?" He continued, surprising the boy all the more.

Renji glanced fitfully back at his captain. "Wha...? I guess so, why?"

"That you are no longer my fukutaichou." Byakuya concluded yet again. Renji stiffened and nodded.

"I just answered that."

Yes, he supposed he really wasn't subject to obeying the rules anymore. He could do as he wished.

Including thrill his ex-taichou.

Whoa! Where the hell did that come from? Renji shook his head and pushed against Byakuya's shoulders stiffly, grimacing.

Byakuya, in response, pushed against him harder to reach Renji's lips once more, and nipped at them, before allowing himself be thrown to Renji's side. The redhead glared at him, panting rasps releasing from his swollen lips. He reached up tentatively to feel one, and winced.

"You bit me," Renji exclaimed, fire returning to his eyes. Byakuya chuckled.

"Hardly. Would you like for me to demonstrate what I did to you? Lend me your hand."

After one tense moment, Renji lifted his arm with uncertainty. He supposed it was from so many years of following the man's every whim that he complied.

When he felt Byakuya's lips descend on his flesh he started. Byakuya first kissed his hand, then opened his mouth to lightly graze his straight, perfect teeth against the tanned skin.

He turned the hand over to lick at the delicate flesh of Renji's wrist. Renji gasped at the contact and shuddered. What was he doing? He should be pushing him off, barking at him to leave him alone.

He doubted either of their body's readiness to withstand what this would lead to.

Renji lifted his free hand to push against Byakuya's head, but watched instead as his fingers threaded through the silky locks of its own accord as Byakuya grazed his teeth farther up, to lick his inner elbow. His lips parted again in suspense as he eyed his taichou. Byakuya sucked the skin of the inside of his elbow into his mouth and pressed his tongue firmly against it, pinning it between his blunt teeth. Renji gasped as Byakuya kneaded the skin in his mouth using both his teeth and tongue. With rhythmic thrusts against his skin by way of a warm, pink tongue, Renji succumbed to the tingling spreading through his body. His fervent skin flushed as he watched, in rapture, as Byakuya dug his teeth into his body with just the right intensity, raising a low groan from his lungs.

His toes curled and his fingers pulled a bit on Byakuya's head. He hissed when Byakuya went harder, immediately tensing to rip his arm away, but Byakuya pinned him with the rest of his body.

Legs came to rest on either side of Renji's thighs and a sinewy, familiar arm pushed firmly against his chest. Byakuya's eyes had been closed, but they were suddenly open and pressing the full force of their dark gaze to Renji, daring him to fight again. Renji shivered at the domination, but quickly succumbed as that warm mouth covered his once again. His ears picked up the sound of a high-pitched whine, and he suddenly recognized it as his own. He flushed and looked up at the man to see the pride in his eyes at the noise.

The next thing he felt (besides the tingling in his groin) was a wet tongue pressing gently at his lips, then suddenly the mouth was sucking on Renji's lower lip, nipping and tugging. Renji's head swam. Before he knew it, his (ex?) taichou had his hands rubbing gently up and down his sides. Renji moaned softly against that hot, teasing mouth, and stopped himself from whining again when Byakuya pulled back to lick his lips and observe his handiwork. Renji scowled at the tiny, smug smirk that plastered itself on the face of the increasingly enchanting man above him.

God, he could hear his heart in his ears, pounding so loudly. He ran his tongue suggestively along his lips as a plea for more, but the nobleman instead leaned to press his lips to Renji's neck. He slowly lifted his arms to wind around the elegant body above him.

"M-more," he gasped as he felt blunt teeth scrape against his hot flesh. Within an eye blink, the noble had leaned back and was sitting a good two feet away from him, expression nothing but content. Renji strained to quiet his panting; urged his heart to slow down. "W-what the hell?!"

Byakuya cocked his head. "What is it?"

"That's it? That's all you're gonna give me?!" Renji shouted, his heart beating like a drum in his ears. He watched the corners of the man's mouth tug ever so slightly.

"What did you expect to happen, Renji?"

Renji shuttered. His name again. Dear Lord, how wonderful it felt to hear his name on his lips. And from Byakuya's expression, Byakuya also knew just how wonderful it truly was for him. Was he playing with him?

"I-I mean... No, I just kinda thought..."

"Where did you think a situation like this would lead us, Renji? With my hand down your pants?"

Renji's jaw slackened, and he slumped to look properly chided. "W-well, yeah! That's kinda where I thought it was headed..."

"Che. Really, Renji. Please." He scoffed, only as a nobleman could. Every sound graceful. How was it possible? "I have not even courted you yet."

Renji's brow furrowed.

"Oi, thassa great thought 'n all, but that ain't exac'ly how we do it in Rukon. I've never been... 'courted'." That word, foreign to his tongue. Burned with the taste of a vocabulary someone as lowly as him should never use. "'N I ain't never been gay with anyone before, either."

"I am not gay, Renji." Byakuya began, precariously lifting his perfectly shaped brow. "Do you know of the term 'bi-sexual'?"

Renji huffed and turned away. "Che. Yeah? Izzat what we are, then?"

"I speak only for myself." Byakuya answered softly, sliding closer to the redhead. "Perhaps I should properly request your hand in courtship, then?"

Renji hesitated. He didn't like the thought of all this. He still hated so much about his life, so what could he possibly have that Byakuya would want? He grew nauseous at the thought. Was it a drive for sex?

He shook his head, eyes a thousand miles away. If that was it, then Byakuya would have taken him when Renji had asked for more. No, Byakuya had to have a different motivation.

'To save your life.'

Renji gasped, ignoring the jerk in the man beside him at the action. He stared at Byakuya's waist, at his zanpakutou. His Zabimaru.

You forgive me, then? Zabimaru? Renji pleaded in his mind, desperately, resting his fingers gently on his blade's scabbard.

Yet he was met only with bitter silence. Renji's eyes fell, expression darkening in sadness. He'd lost the respect of his blade. His weapon; his partners.

"I'm so sorry..." he whispered, so quietly Byakuya would have sworn it hadn't happened if his eyes had not been glued to Renji's face, the movement of his lips drawing him in. Renji's fingers rubbed lightly on his sheath.

"Would you like your zanpakutou returned to you?" Came Byakuya's smooth voice, calling Renji's eyes to his.

Renji hesitated, biting his lip to concentrate once more on his blade's voice. Nothing.

"I don't deserve them," his face fell again, and Renji withdrew his fingers. "Besides, I lost my right as a shinigami when I..."

"Mm. Yes, you did." They were both thoughtful for a series of seconds. Byakuya looked at him again before continuing. "But, you are no longer a shinigami, are you?"

Renji pulled his knees to his chest. "What the hell 'm I supposed to do, taichou?" His voice broke. "S'not like I can just parade back into my old life. I hate it there. I hate the Seireitei."

Byakuya nodded considerately. "What do you want to do?"

Again, Renji shook his head. The wind was pleasant even still, and he welcomed it against his tired body. The flush had almost left his body, leaving a healthy glow to his skin. His hair, disheveled, hung limply against his back once the wind died down, the tie long lost. And his eyes, hardened with the events of the past few years, skewered the grass around them. Before he knew it, Renji was being pulled into Byakuya's arms.

"You have time. You do not have to decide anything tonight." Byakuya whispered into Renji's fiery hair. He hesitated before continuing. "And I am willing to sit back for a few more days until you straighten things out. I will not leave you here alone. I will not let them find you... yet. But know that I still have a duty to the Seireitei, Renji. And you still have a duty to them as well. You cannot just defect-"

That word. That fucking word.

Just like Aizen. Just like Ichimaru. Just like Tousen. What the hell had he done?

The rest of the words leaving Byakuya's mouth were just that: words. Blurred, distant humming to his ears. His mouth fell slack, his eyes widened, and above all his breathing stopped.

He was just like them.

"Renji?"

Just like those damned betrayers. The faggots who slaughtered what was their own people to join forces with... he couldn't quite find the word. Those things. Those... hollows. He was doing what they had done. He half expected himself to pull on an arrancar uniform and call himself one of those slimy fuckers.

"Renji."

"Oh, God, taichou. I'm jus' like them. I defected. Oh God... oh Gooood..." Renji threaded his fingers through his crimson hair and tugged hard enough to hurt. "What the hell have I done? I've betrayed ever'one! I've done the same thing-"

Byakuya silenced him with his lips. Renji's mind kept reeling although no words left his mouth. He was still in horror. He was still mortified. He was oblivious to the movements against his lips.

When Byakuya pulled away, hoping to have calmed his comrade, Renji's eyes were tearing up. "I'd be better off dead!"

Byakuya pulled away as if burned. "Do you really think that?"

"There's no fuckin' point! Oh, God... I'm just fuckin' like them! Don't you get it? And, fuck, you went 'n kissed me...! What the hell is the matter with you? That's like kissing them!"

"Well, Renji, I do not think-"

"Oh, God! Why did you stop me! Why did you let me become this... this thing! I don't want to be like this! I don't want to be what I was supposed to be fighting against!"

Byakuya grabbed his face and pulled him close. "Will you just listen to me a moment, Renji?"

Head spinning. Just like them. He'd be better off dead. Just like them!

"Are you going to run off and join Aizen?"

"Fuck no!"

Byakuya flinched at the language. Really, he should have been used to it by now.

"Then what are you frightened of?"

Renji begged his tongue to come up with an answer. Begged his mind to figure things out. But the words just kept repeating themselves in his head.

Just like them. And now he'd dragged Byakuya down with him. Dammit.

"You're in this too, now, aren't 'cha?" Renji whispered. Byakuya's eyes cooled for a moment.

"I am open for change. Duty or not."

A silence.

"You need to get your mind off it for a moment, Renji. It would be good for you to clear your head."

Another silence. In his mind he was screaming, deafening all his thoughts. In his mind he was pounding his face against a wall, bashing the visions of him in an arrancar uniform out of his skull. Dammit.

He looked up at his taichou. And then to his feet. And then at his taichou again.

"I'm so sorry." Was all he said, words coming out jumbled and hurried.

"I am the one who failed you, Renji." Byakuya replied. "I saw... I saw you breaking. I did not do a thing. I just let it happen."

Renji barely understood what he was saying. His mind wouldn't slow down. His head wouldn't stop hurting. And that sun was suddenly too bright in the sky. It made him visible. It made this... defector visible. And he really wished no one could see him ever again. He really wished...

Before he realized what was happening, Renji found himself on his back with his legs spread and Byakuya in between them.

"I will help you forget, Renji. I will help you calm down." Byakuya whispered in his ear.

And the world seemed to stop.

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A/N:

Hmm. Better than I expected.

Reviews, people! I may just do a one-shot for you!