I just learned my rank and decided that even though I would lose the people who matter most to me I was going after the leadership position. I knew Dauntless had an arrangement with Erudite but I was hoping to sway the minds of the other leaders before our faction succumbed to Jeanine's propaganda. We would all become her puppets if I couldn't sway at least one leader to change there mind. I knew trying to change Eric or Max was going to be highly dangerous on my part since only Tobias knew of my divergence. Speaking of Tobias I better get to him and let him know what I've decided to do.
I head to his apartment for what I know will be the last time and feel my chest start to feel with a heaviness I know will take awhile to get over. My heart feels like it's being crushed into a million pieces already for what I'm about to do. As I arrive at the door I timidly knock twice, just loud enough for Tobias to hear. I can hear his footsteps approaching and the ache grows more within me. As he opens the door he smiles a little at me not knowing I'm about to break both our hearts. "Hey Tris, I seen your rank. You did great just like I knew you would." Tobias tells me. "Yeah about that. We should talk about a few things." Tobias' eye brows furrowed at that. "What do you mean Tris? Is everything alright?" He asked showing his concern like he usually does. "I wanted you to know that I'm going to ask for the leadership position." "What? No Tris, you know how dangerous that is and that they have the arrangement with Erudite, I told you so we could prepare and leave if necessary, not for you to join them." Tobias spits out angrily. "I know but they aren't doing anything right away and I'd like to try and sway their minds. I'm sorry this isn't what you want but it's about more than just us. How many lives would be destroyed if Dauntless continues on with Erudite? I can't let that happen if there is even the slightest chance to change the outcome." I tell him calmly.
Tobias just stares at me for what feels like an eternity then he finally speaks, "You realize what your doing not only to us but your friends? I love you Tris, but I can't do this if you go for leadership." He tells me in a hurt voice. "Yes, I do know that but it's what I feel is the right thing to do. I hoped you would understand and be by my side but I see now that is not going to happen," I replied. Tobias walks over to me, kisses my forehead and heads towards his room without another word. The silence is almost deafening. I take that as my cue to leave.
I slowly walk back towards the dorms in search of my friends to get the rest of the heartbreak out of the way. As I near the chasm I bump into someone from not watching where I was going. As I looked up I realized I was staring into the cold gray eyes if none other than Eric. "Watch it Stiff." He sneered at me and continued on. Looks like its going to be harder than I thought, I think to myself.
Just as I reach the dorms I hear Christina's loud Candor voice echoing throughout the room and Will's deeper voice trying to calm her down. Just as I entered I heard her voice again in a calming tone speaking, " I just don't know where she would've gone, I mean we're all her except Tris and she ranked 1st why run off?" Christina was asking no one in particular. "I'm right here," I stated as calmly as I could given the nerves I was feeling. "Tris! Where were you? Where did you go? I was so worried," Christina rambled for a moment. "I went to speak with Four about a few things," I told them all. "Oh, what about?," Will asked. "Well I'm ranked 1st as Christina pointed out and I have decided to ask about the leadership position since I get 1st pick." I stated boldly. "What!" Peter demanded. "You knew I was going for that," he shouted at me. "Yes, and you would run Dauntless into the ground if you got the position," I replied flatly.
Christina continued to stare at me accusingly until her Candor mouth got the better of her. "I can't believe you would so that after everything Eric has done to all of us," she stated defiantly. "Well I want a chance to change things and by going for leadership is the only way to do that," I spoke as normal as I could with all the staring and glare being threw my way. Christina looked at me again before shaking her head muttering traitor under her breath leaving the dorms with Will following het closely.
"Congrats Stiff, looks like you just lost your only friends," Peter stated with a disgusting grin on his face then followed them out the doors leaving only me in my misery I created myself.
I headed towards my bed not feeling up to doing anything more until tomorrow morning when things have had a chance to calm down and I gathered myself enough to face Max and Eric about taking the leadership position.