Stuttering Heart
Friday
I tried to block my face as paper balls were thrown at me on my way down the hallways. Every since yesterday, word about my stuttering got out and spread like a wild fire. I tried to ignore it since it was only the beginning of the day, but it was pretty hard, seeing as though they're heartless enough to throw paper at me without a care in the world. While I was covering my face, I didn't notice the foot out in front of me. I tripped on it and fell onto my side. The hallway crowd started another round of laughter at me. I felt someone pulling at my arm and saw Iggy. He helped me up and led me to my locker.
"Don't worry about them," Iggy told me, "It's knew to them. When something else gets out, you'll be old news. All will be forgotten and you can be a normal kid—well as normal as someone in the flock can get." I cracked a small smile while getting my stuff out of my locker.
"T-thanks for he-helping m-me bac-back there," I whispered.
"Anytime for a fellow mate!" Iggy said to me. Iggy, Nudge, and Gazzy were pretty nice to me. I understand that they're my friends and all, but what if they turned on me? No, they wouldn't do that...if they wanted to, they would have already. But what if they just want to build up my trust and break it to pieces?
I shook my head. They wouldn't do that, and I know they wouldn't. They're my friends, and friends don't do stuff like that to other friends.
"Are you okay?" Iggy asked me worriedly.
"Y-yeah, I-I'm j-just thinki-ing," I stuttered. He nodded and patted my shoulder while glaring at the others for making faces at me. Once again, thank you god, for blessing me with such good friends.
He sat next to me in class. I didn't want pity and my friends knew that. They respected my request and acted as if I didn't stutter. The one thing that I hated was that the teachers didn't listen to me and acted as if I was a handicap 4 year old that couldn't speak English. That coming from a teacher, made me feel worse than what the kids did to me. I thought the teachers were supposed to stop the bullying and not join in.
Class began, but I didn't pay attention, because A) the teacher wouldn't call on me because of the stuttering, B) I knew everything she was talking about, and C) remember? I'm the handicap foreign 4 year old. I just pulled out my journal to write another page.
Friday:
The kids made fun of me today. They threw paper at my face, and someone tripped me. It was the worst thing that has happened since I came here. It was only the second day, but my brand new friend, Iggy, stood up for me. He helped me up and glared at all the people that made faces at me. I am truly blessed to have at least 3 good friends that aren't afraid to be judged for standing up for me. Journal, I am thankful for my friends, but I am still confused. What if they're just building up my trust to break it down and shove it in my face? I don't know what to do. Thanks for listening, journal.
Nick
I finished writing the page just as the bell rang. I grabbed my stuff and kept my head down. Iggy was next to me, walking me to my other class to make sure nothing happened to me. After walking me to class, Iggy left to his own class, not caring that he was 4 minutes late.
I didn't have any of my friends in this class. I made sure to sit in the very corner in the back next to the window. I didn't want to have to see people staring at me when I turned around. I stared out the window before I got a waft of perfume in my nose. I turned to see the girl that had teased me from yesterday.
I admit, she was beautiful, even with make-up covering her face. She had beautiful blonde-brown locks that fell down her back and stopped mid-way. Her eyes were creamy chocolate brown with flakes of blue in them. Her skin looked flawless, no pimples, zits, or break outs. It looked smooth, so smooth that I wanted to reach out and—what am I talking about? She's a bully, a cold-hearted person who has the need to put down on anyone who is different from her.
She turned from laughing with her friends. When her eyes landed on me, she stopped laughing and glared at me.
"Wh-what are y-you look-looking a-a-at," She mocked. I growled under my breath and turned away. She laughed with the others that heard the conversation. Great. She's my sitting buddy for this entire year. That sucks. Well, it's my life...it wouldn't be the same without the 'suck' part (**TWSS).
I pulled out my journal to write another page in it.
Friday (2)
Dear Journal, I know I shouldn't feel this way, but I do. This girl, the one bullying me. She's physically beautiful. She has flawless skin, and her hair can't decide on whether it wants to be brown or blonde, yet it falls perfectly down her back. I shouldn't feel like my breath was taken away. I know I shouldn't, but every time I look into those creamy eyes of hers I seem to be endlessly drowning in its river of chocolate. Time seems to slow down when I look at her. Whether she's mocking me or just laughing at my problems and flaws. She wears make-up even though she doesn't need it. She is utterly beautiful...but how can I say all these stuff about her if I don't know her name. Not to mention she's apart of my personal KKK mob group. She's out to break me. To break whatever spirit I have left in wanting to live—which isn't that much. Well, it wasn't that much until I met my friends. I think I'm in love. It's obviously stupid to fall for my attacker. The one out for blood.
Journal, I can't explain it any simpler than this: I'm head-over-heels for this girl, but she can't be mine. Whether she chooses to or not. She's a monster on her guard, ready to maul anything in her way, or just to please her pleasure. I'll never find true-love with someone like her, someone barely trying to attack my barriers, but is obviously tearing it down with ease.
I need to forget about this. But I can't. Or I don't want to. Even if I tried 120%, I wouldn't succeed. Not even 1%. My life sucks. I can't, or wont ever, find true-love. Someone who will love me for who I am except my 3 friends and mother. It's sad actually. Once again, thanks for listening journal.
Nick
I slammed my notebook close when I noticed that she was leaning over to look at what I had.
"I need to copy your notes, give them to me," She hissed, trying to pull my journal from my hands. I moved it out of the way before she could even touch it.
"I d-don't h-have the no-notes," I whispered back.
"Whatever, you could have just said no if you didn't want me to copy them. You didn't have to lie about it. I know you have notes; you've writing in that notebook the entire class period, smart one," She rolled her eyes. That was the first thing she's said without mocking my stuttering. It surprised me but I shook it off and kept on a blank face. I've accomplished the best poker face throughout my years of being bullied.
She huffed and crossed her arms, turning back to the front of the class. Who knew she actually cared about her grades. I wouldn't have thought she had time for studying and taking notes between all her bullying and insulting. Actually, if someone told me that, I probably wouldn't have believed them.
The bell rung, signaling the end of class and the beginning of lunch. I got out of my chair and walked to the cafeteria, trying to cover my face with my hair but still showing enough for me to look for Iggy and the others. I grabbed a tray and slid it down the tray rail. There was only won pizza left. I reached for it the same time as some one else did. When we touched a zap trickled up my arm. After that, I felt someones soft, warm hand on mine. I turned and saw that it was sitting-buddy next to me.
"Oh-uh...I-I'm s-sorry," She stuttered, but not purposefully making fun of me. I pulled my hand back and let her grab the last pizza while I grabbed a burger.
"Thanks," She whispered as she passed me to a table with her friends. She spared me one last glance before turning all the way around and joined the table's conversation.
I walked around, looking for the others. I saw them in the corner of the room.
"H-hey guys," I greeted them.
"Hey there Nick!" Nudge chirped. Gazzy and and Iggy nodded in my direction. They were distracted by the ball of wires in front of them.
"W-What's that?" I asked them curiously.
"It's their latest death contraption," Nudge informed me. I nodded and bit into my burger.
The day went on with a little bit of mocking or a little bit of taunting. Iggy was right. The news about my stuttering was starting to die down, well to the normal kids they did, but not for the popular kids. They wouldn't drop the fact that I had a stuttering problem. It was like they've never heard of a such thing called 'stuttering'.
Mom greeted me as I stepped into the door of our house. I told her I had homework and headed upstairs to write in my journal.
Friday(3)
This is my third, and last entrance for today. During lunch, sitting-buddy touched my hand. I don't know if it was a good or bad sign, but I felt a zap. I know I need to stop. I will stop. I have to stop thinking about her. I am determined not to fall in love with the leader of my KKK hate-group. From now on, she's nothing but another bully.
Iggy and Gazzy started another bomb. I'm surprised they finished that complex looking one from yesterday already. I guess I know who to call when I find a bomb under my pillow or under my bathroom sink. Night and thanks for listening Journal.
Nick
Yeah? No? Like? Don't like? Haha, I tried to do it more in Fang's POV rather than Max's. I will switch between different POV's! (: hope you liked it! And for those waiting on noh ss!w to be updated heres the news:
I think that Naomi and I should split up the story, her version my version. I don't know if she wants her own version, but I really wanna update for the readers. Naomi's too lazy to actually write with me, so I'm just gonna do it on my own! (: It may not be as professional as chapter one, but its my style of writing...which isnt professional and all big worded lol.
Also, I need to know if A) you guys want me to do requests for stories/one-shots and B) you guys want little 'get to know you' questions in the bottom A/N's. Thanks for reading! :D