My muse decided to add a chapter and told me she had a story outlined for a multi-fic.
Milah waited for the amber liquid that still burned in her throat to do its own magic, to soothe her nerves and calm her emotions until she felt nothing but a pleasant, weightless feeling. She hummed and started singing.
Oh! I am uneasy
And troubled in mind,
Oh! I am uneasy
And troubled in mind.
Here's no joy nor pleasure,
Here's sorrow none can measure,
Here's no joy nor pleasure
In this world can I find.
She didn't want to think, didn't want to feel. She'll wait for the morning to do that. She poured more rum into her glass and downed it. Putting the tumbler down with a jolt on the table, though making sure it wasn't too hard so as not to break it. She didn't want to clean up broken glass that night. It was an impatient move. She wanted the rum to start working quicker.
Then she felt it, the liquor started doing its work, making her feel sleepy and ragged. She stood up from her chair and twirled around to see if she would lose her balance. It did. She stumbled towards the bed and laughed. It was silly but anything to keep her from thinking about what happened. She crept into bed and lay down facing the wall. She lay there for a while until she heard Killian come in. She pretended to sleep so she didn't have to talk to him.
Killian knew Milah's moods. If she decided she didn't want to talk to him, she wouldn't. He had just escorted what was formerly known as the Golden Swan, now Emma Swan, to the brig so she can lay on a cot undisturbed and protected from his crew. He made sure to pocket the key so no one else would have access to her. The blonde's sorrow was palpable. Her grief filled the air. He would hear her story later but the immediate problem was Milah.
He let out a sigh after he surveyed the empty tumbler and opened rum bottle on the table. He carefully took off Milah's boots so that she would be more comfortable sleeping. He left her clothes on so she could sleep or avoid him, whatever was easiest. He felt partially relieved that she didn't want to talk. What could he possibly say to her? He didn't even know himself. What made him kiss the statue? It was almost as if he was drawn by an invisible force, every fiber in his being screamed to kiss it. Maybe he was finally losing his mind. He decided to sleep in order to rest his brain. Maybe he would think clearer when he woke up.
He undressed and lay down next to Milah. His thoughts kept going back to Emma Swan. Her presence felt familiar. But he would have remembered if he met someone like her before. She was even more beautiful than her statue. It seemed like he understood why she was sad, but didn't know the events that led up to it. He fell asleep wondering what kind of a man Emma Swan called "her love."
Emma woke up to the early morning light in her eyes that felt scratchy, puffy and achy as a result from crying herself to sleep. She felt disoriented and it took a while before she realized where she was. Then the memories from last night came rushing back to her, frozen for a thousand years, waking up on a pirate ship, being escorted by the Captain to her sleeping quarters, also known as the brig. She slowly tested her muscles as she got up, trying to get the kinks out and spied the chamber pot to perform her ablutions. She quickly took care of her needs. Once she did, she sat in her narrow cot and leaned against the wall unable to think or feel anymore. Her emotions were spent for the time being.
She heard the door open and footsteps coming down a ladder. It was the captain of the pirate ship. She hardly turned her head to look at him. If he looked at him it would remind her that she needed to think of the immediate future and she wasn't ready to do that yet.
Killian unlocked the door to the brig and swung the bar doors open.
"Your breakfast, milady," Killian set down a plate of food on a small table near Emma Swan.
He noticed she didn't turn her head to look in his direction or acknowledge him in anyway. Her eyes seemed to stare off into the distance.
"Are you alright?" Killian asked.
"I won't ever be," her lifeless voice said.
It reminded him of how he was when his brother Liam died. Completely desolate. As much as he wanted to comfort her, he knew there was nothing he could do so he left her and went back to steer the ship. Let time heal her wounds. It would have been awkward anyway if he had tried to put an arm around her or whatever people do to ease someone's grief.
He watched Milah walk across the deck to perform her duties. Even though she was his woman, she still pulled her weight on his ship. He left her still sleeping when he left his cabin this morning. They still hadn't spoken about what happened. He didn't know what to say. He couldn't explain his actions.
After some time passed, he realized Milah was ignoring him. She hadn't spoken to him or looked in his direction all morning long. Let her seethe for now and she'll calm down later.
Later was this afternoon. Killian walked into their cabin to find Milah sitting up on the bed and reading a book. He pulled up a chair to have a conversation.
"We need to talk about what happened last night," Killian started.
"What happened, Killian?" Milah snapped the book she was reading shut and placed it on the side table looking at him expectantly.
"I don't know why I kissed the statue."
"Well, that helps!" she answered sarcastically.
"It happened and I can't take it back!"
"A curse like that can only be broken by…a type of…kiss!" MIlah didn't even want to say the words.
"I don't even know the woman."
"Which makes it even more insane! What are you going to tell the crew?"
"I'll tell them the treasure turned into a woman. They don't need to know how."
"What are you going to do about her?" Milah looked at him point blank.
Killian wasn't sure what to do about her. She had no one in this world. Letting her off at the next harbor was just as abhorrent to him as melting her statue into gold coins. But if that was what Milah wanted then he'd do it.
"Is there anything in your research that could possibly tell us who she is? Emma Swan?" Killian needed to stall, maybe figure out where she came from and take her there. At least she'll be familiar with the land that she came from.
"Oh, so you found out her name?" Milah looked at him with accusation in her eyes. "She came from the Enchanted Forest."
"We'll take her there," Kiliian decided. It would be another month of travel to get to the Enchanted Forest. He also knew Milah would want to see her son.
Milah's ears picked up.
"Maybe it's time I visit my son," Milah felt this was good enough time to ask. Not only was Baelfire old enough to live on a pirate ship but she could tell Killian was feeling contrite enough to grant her what she had been wanting to do - take Bae with them.
"Aye, it would be good for you to see your son," Killian had a twinge of guilt when Milah mentioned Bae. What must the lad think of him? Of the man that took his mother away on his ship? Even if she did beg to go, it still never sat right with Killian that he assisted in parting a child from his mother. It was unforgivable. He remembered what it was like to be parted from his father and mother. He shook it off by thinking Bae was just another child among many that was left alone in the world, just like others had before him and will come after him.
Killian cast off his guilt same as every time he thought of his past misdeeds. He was a pirate and there was no room for softness on board a pirate ship. If the lad didn't forgive him then he would just have to accept it.
"So it's settled then, we're going to the Enchanted Forest," Killian squeezed her knee as a sign of reassurance. He got up to go on deck and call out the orders giving them a new heading.
For the past two days Emma didn't touch her food that Killian brought her. He was getting worried that she would starve herself to death.
"Bad form to waste food, Swan," Killian made his voice sound rough.
"I can't swallow it," Emma said. Nothing could get past the lump in her throat. It would just come back up anyway.
"Maybe a walk on the deck would do you good?" Killian offered. He already told his crew that the golden statue changed to a woman. They had so many questions but when their Captain didn't want to give explanations, they knew to stop asking.
They were all interested to see the woman but also feared her. Sailors were a superstitious bunch and that may either work for or against her favor.
"I'm allowed out?" Emma was surprised.
"These bars are to keep the crew away from you."
Typical pirates.
"Alright," Emma acquiesced. She stood up while Killian unlocked the door.
He let her climb the ladder first.
The sea spray felt good on her face. Looking out at the vastness of the ocean made her feel smaller which was a bit of a comfort. She was only one woman in this world. Her sorrows shouldn't matter much compared to the rest of the world.
Killian signaled with his hand for one of his men to watch Emma while he went to have a discussion with his bos'n. The sailors gave her a wide berth. Last time they saw her, she was a statue getting lowered into the ship's hold. To see her walking around was unnerving.
Milah spotted her walking along the deck and turned her back to ignore her while fixing some rope. Emma was rather surprised that a woman was aboard. Even more so when the woman paid her no attention but in fact could sense hostility emanating from her. Emma could tell the other woman wasn't happy that she was here.
She snorted to herself that she wasn't happy to be there either. Emma looked out at the water and thought of what it would be like to jump in and let the water embrace her. What it would feel like to breathe in sea water and slowly sink to the bottom. She got a hold of herself. It wouldn't do anyone any good to think those thoughts.
Killian was aware of her whereabouts on his ship. She had taken a few turns on deck until she crept slowly down into the brig where he heard her close the cage door behind her. He found her lying on the cot when he brought her some food. Her eyes were red and puffy. He was relieved when he came back to fetch her tray that she had taken a few bites of some of the food he left for her. It was better than nothing.
He wanted to give her something to look forward to and lift her spirits, "I'm taking you back to the Enchanted Forest."
She turned her head to look at him, expressionless, "Thank you."
"It's where you are from, correct?"
"Yes."
"Would you be glad to be home?"
"Home is where the people you love are. I don't have a home. But I'm glad to be going there regardless."
Hearing her say that made Killian sad, but he was satisfied that she said she was glad to be going back to the Enchanted Forest. When Killian returned to his cabin, Milah was sitting at his desk pouring over papers.
"Looking for our next adventure, love?" Killian smiled, happy to see that she was in a better mood.
"Once we dump the Golden Swanny girl, we could go get Bae and sail to Camelot. He would enjoy the jousts and knights."
"That sounds like a good plan, love," he felt irritated at what Milah called her.
"Things between us haven't been as good as they were," Milah plainly stated.
Killian knew there were ups and downs in every relationship. It didn't mean they would just give up.
"Maybe a new adventure can change that and an addition to the crew," Killian was looking forward to the idea that the boy would join with them. That is, if Bae would agree.
Milah smiled and continued to organize her papers. Killian was content and was able to relax a bit now that she was in good spirits.
Now that the Captain decided to take her to the Enchanted Forest, Emma was forced to think about what she was going to do next. She would have to prepare herself for any changes that would have happened in the last thousand years, assuming it was a thousand years since she has set foot in the Enchanted Forest. Then she started wondering if she should have trusted the pirate. From what he told her, which wasn't much, she didn't detect any lie coming from him, but her lie detector was faulty when her emotions were out of control.
He wasn't unkind to her. He seemed interested in conversing but she was too distraught. She would have to find out if he was telling her the truth once her feet was on land.
The captain came down again to give her something to eat and left when she gave monosyllabic answers to his questions. She was able to take small bites that went down better. Her ale and water was warm but helped her to swallow the well-chewed bites. He came down again to take her tray and let her out. He once again led Emma to the upper deck to take a walk.
She did one lap around the ship when the dark haired woman asked of the captain, "Shouldn't she be put to work?"
The Captain looked awkward. "Do you know anything about sailing a ship?"
Emma noticed some ripped sails, possibly damage from a storm, "I can fix the sails."
"Good," Killian ordered one of his men to get some tools so she can start repairing.
Emma sat on a barrel and started to repair the canvas. The crew went about their business. She liked keeping busy. Before she woke up on a pirate ship, she was always busy with some crisis or another. What she always needed was a long break from it all and now she has her break. Another lump formed in her throat at the thought. She tamped it down. It wouldn't do any good to start crying when she had a lot of sail to mend.
Pushing the hand awl through the canvas seemed symbolic. She was always trying to fix things but ended up poking more holes in it. Eventually a gust of wind would come along and just rip it apart. It made her angry. Anger seemed better than sorrow. Soon she was stabbing the needle through the canvas and pulling the string through harshly, letting her anger out a little at a time.
Killian noticed Emma's erratic movements but said nothing. Milah came up to wrap her arms around his waist and nuzzle his neck as he steered the ship. He saw Emma's glance dart towards them. She turned her back and faced away from them. He couldn't tell anything from Emma's expression and felt mildly disappointed.
So that's the Captain's love, Emma thought. She's possessive, Emma observed. Emma turned so that the light would shine on the sail and it would be easier to see where to sew without a shadow. Once she finished mending the sail, she would probably look for other things to do on the ship. This wasn't her first voyage. She knew what needed to be done. She might as well work off her passage so she wouldn't feel beholden to the captain.
Since her mind was on the captain she realized if he brought her aboard the ship as a gold statue that meant she was treasure. Probably stolen treasure. Treasure lost. That's probably why the dark-haired woman had waves of animosity coming off her. It started to make sense now that she could think clearer and didn't let grief completely consume her. What a disappointment it must have been. Serves him right, she smirked.
But how did she transform from a statue back to herself? She thought she had an answer but it didn't seem like the right one. The person that could transform her back was not alive anymore, or was he? The thought quickened her pulse but she didn't want to get her hopes up. She would need to find out how she was transformed and she knew the captain had the answers she sought.
Killian felt Milah's hot mouth on his neck which was the most affection she had shown him since Emma transformed back to her human form. He knew she was just doing it for show, claiming him as hers in front of Emma. Judging from Emma's non-reaction, Emma didn't seem to care and kept working on the sail. If Milah's show of warmth meant she was putting what happened behind them, he'd find out soon enough if she was genuine when they were alone together. Milah pulled away and returned to fixing some rope.
After several hours, Emma fixed as much as she could while the sun was high in the sky and had to leave the rest for the next day. The shadows were getting longer and Emma felt it was time to go down to her little cage and stay there for the remainder. After she shut the door to her cell, another wave of grief consumed her. These bouts of overwhelming sadness came upon her many times throughout the day. Sometimes it came unexpectedly, sometimes she would be thinking on the events of her past and she would feel her anguish flow over her.
The Captain brought her meal to her and set it down on her stool with a flourish, "Culinary delights await, milady."
She looked at the plate and saw biscuits smothered in gravy and fried fish. She looked at him without smiling.
"I was only joking," Killian gave her a small smile. "Unfortunately the food on a ship is quite limited."
"Thank you," she said monotonously.
"You're welcome," Killian responded. The smile in his eyes died down, "I know what it's like to lose someone you love."
Out of the blue she point blank asked, "How did I turn to human form?"
He was startled at the unexpectedness of her question. He didn't want to answer, afraid of how she would react.
"I don't think I'm ready to tell you, lass."
"Don't stall, just tell me."
He admired her bluntness. Killian waited a few heartbeats before he told her, "I kissed you."
"You kissed a statue?" Emma deadpanned.
Hearing how it sounded made him feel like a fool. "Yes."
"Do you make a habit out of kissing statues?"
"No, I don't" he emphasized the "t" sound.
Emma laughed quietly. Killian thought she was laughing at him.
"You kissed a golden statue and I turned human," Emma stated. "I guess any kiss will do."
She said that thought aloud.
"Actually about two centuries ago, your statue was placed in a temple honoring you and men were lined up to kiss the lips of your statue. Then a war broke out and your statue went missing."
"Your kiss, did it? I find that impossible."
Killian looked down, unsure why her words caused a pang in his heart.
"Why would you say that, love?"
"You're not my true love. My true love is dead and you're not him."
Her words cut him and he flinched.
"Well, maybe there's not much stock in those myths about curses and such," he backed out of the cage feeling dejected. He shouldn't have told her.
Emma looked away after seeing how his eyes grew sad. He shut the door and climbed back up the ladder.
The song that Milah sings is Poor Sally Sits A-Weeping by Lesley Nelson-Burns