One is the Loneliest Number
Chapter 2: The Threshold of Hell
Before I get into what unfolded over the next few years, and what happened with Aurora, Lockhart, Snape and I, as I became tenured at Hogwarts, it is probably important that I paint a picture of what a typical day with Snape would be like. So perhaps I can tell you about what happened last week and then start from the beginning. So you can see where everything went…
Last Thursday
"Damn it," I squealed in a deluge of fury and frustration. I hadn't done this since I started Hogwarts a few of years ago. It was the first week of school and I had forgotten the new password I had created to enter my quarters.
Dumbledore had advised that we change them every so often. I am sure he had his reasons. What with fake Moody, the Sirius Black debacle, a werewolf, and a troll on the loose, and other assorted scenarios where security was an issue, it was highly prudent to change passwords from time to time. If only to safeguard one's possessions from Peeves, who one could add attempted burglary and property damage to poltergeist on his employee file. If he, er, had one…
The portraits did it frequently….why not?
Sybil was constantly forgetting. You would think she would be able to foresee this by now.
Well, everyone had forgotten theirs over the years at least once. Pomona always told me about the time when she was very young and had to go to the Headmaster's office to ask him to utilize some fairly amazing magic to open her door so she could enter and devise a new password and some additional spells that took a half an hour or so.
There were files, grades, our personal possessions, and many other reasons that we should be concerned. The Weasley twins….for one and two… and many other pranksters that might think it would be cute to enter a professor's rooms and wreak a little havoc.
Apparently the entire staff had this concern…with the exception of Snape.
Nobody would dare….or care too. I was sure of it.
Plus he had more spell security. Rumor had it, even more than the Headmaster himself.
Well, what would you expect? The bastard had a lot of enemies.
Me included.
Well, I never wanted things to turn out like they had. He made me. Er, I mean he made me his enemy through no fault of my own.
Things could have been different. If he wasn't such a sonofabitch…
And really if he wasn't Snape.
So I tried a few words out loud to jog my memory but it was no use.
I couldn't remember…the only thing that came to mind were old ones.
What the hell had I just changed it too?
Why the hell hadn't I just written it on a little piece of parchment and kept it on me?
Why was I pacing back and forth talking to myself….because as I faced my door again after circling near the corner to the entrance, I noticed I was not alone any longer…
It was the bastard himself…in the flesh….and the bloody robes he never washed.
At this point in time, he had snuck up on me so often, I was mildly convinced that he might be spying on me. Or he had nothing better to do. Or he just wanted to drive me utterly insane. Or maybe even all three.
It broke my concentration and for that I was pissed because I vaguely remembered that this time I had named the password after one of the many pets I had had that was named…
I noticed the black robes first that enveloped the sinister and dark person before me. They rippled slightly and then were deathly still as he stopped short in front of my doorway.
What business did he have here? I was up in the Ravenclaw tower. The only rooms up here were the dormitories, Rowena's old suite of rooms that Filius occupied, and my set of rooms. He only came here if he felt particularly vengeful and wanted to bother me, wake me at four in the morning during the Triwizard Tournament to tell me of the rumor about dragons and how I and he as my mentor would be assisting which was rubbish, or five in the morning when we had to brew potions during a seemingly nasty outbreak of spattergroit one year, when he claimed he simply could not do it on his own, well, he could, but the Headmaster had insisted that since he was my mentor, I should assist.
Just to piss me off!
So he was dark and still and motionless and eerily quiet. Actually, there was nothing to remark about at all, and then the ironic smirk, that begged me to slap his face, grew slowly.
"Ah, Vector…now now, what is it that you are doing?"
"None of your damned business…billow down to the dungeons where the rest of the bats are," I cracked.
He studied me in silence with slight interest dawning on his face. It was on purpose. He wanted me to get to the point where we both knew I wanted to slap him…again.
"It is not entirely unusual and hardly surprising to me. The insane are known to pace and babble to themselves with frequency. Among my many arduous tasks and responsibilities, I can't imagine why the Headmaster never delegated interviewing new employees to the list. There were several Arithmancers he was looking at the year you were hired. At times, McGonagall has even assisted with this when he…."
"Oh, I can't imagine why….maybe because you are a bloody maniac…I mean, why would he not? You are such a damned people person. I can't understand why he would overlook the potential right there in front of him and…."I was livid.
"Really, Vector….quite unnecessary. I have calming draughts on my person if you see fit to carry on and yell like a banshee." He looked down at his robes and mock felt the inside pocket.
I gave him a nasty look, turned on my heel, and faced my locked door. I proceeded to ignore him. I believed my chilling glare as I turned away would speak for me. Perhaps I would have enough stalling time to recall the password, enter, and slam the door in his face.
That would be….heavenly….the thought alone made me almost recall that I was outside the door only Thursday, when it occurred to me to make my password…
"Vector, out of Head of House duties, and albeit a slight concern for the welfare of the students…well, Potter…not so much…but why are you outside of your rooms quarrelling with yourself?"
I didn't like the mock silky tone he used.
I tiffed, whistled low, and tried not to grit my teeth in annoyance. Couldn't the asshole see that…
"Because I can't get in, you bloody moron!"
And he looked slightly taken aback for only a moment and then a thought occurred to him.
And apparently it was a highly amusing thought for he was rarely amused, because the smirk turned into a slightly lop-sided, yet diabolically evil grin.
He took his time before commenting. "Correct me if I am wrong. Are you claiming that you cannot enter your quarters presently," he asked softly.
"Yes, bastard. I am. Happy now? Can you just go away, er, fly, or whatever the hell it is that I saw you do that one time when it was dark out and late and I looked outside my window and screamed because I thought a dementor was hovering over the castle, and I alerted the Headmaster and he told me it was you, not to tell a soul, and with good reason it would be a secret between me and him?" I rambled.
"I am guessing that he implied it was Hogwarts business?"
He still looked amused.
"Yes, as a matter of fact he, er, did."
"Good. It was…in a way." He gave me his mysterious glance that for the life of me annoyed me to no end.
I was so tired of their secret spying innuendo bullshit I dropped it. I'd rather not know.
"Anyway, Vector, back to the matter at hand. Am I mistaken, or were you just telling me that you cannot open your door?"
"Yesssssss…..enough already. How many damned times do you want me to say it?"
He looked at me oddly. I had never seen the exact expression before. But the one after it I had, and it was with much foreboding that I prepared myself the best I could because I had deduced that:
He was amused. And this was never a good thing. I knew this from experience.
It meant he would press my buttons until I broke and it would take some time.
He had that expression on his face which said it was highly unlikely that whatever he would say next would be dropped easily, despite any efforts on my part to extricate myself from his odious presence.
The look also said, "Vector, you are a dolt." Yes, it spoke to me.
It also said that he was going to go with this and milk it for whatever it was worth. And now we had come full circle. Apparently it was worth his time for the amusement factor. He was very, very amused.
And then he turned abruptly, with his back towards me. I saw his shoulders slightly sag downward in his dark cloak. And then shake and twitch a little. But even with his dark hair falling into his face I could see that…
The sonofabitch was laughing at me. Hard!
So hard that he couldn't face me… It went on for a few more seconds.
I impatiently threw up my hands and then crossed them over my chest. My temper was rising rapidly.
He turned once more to me and I could see that the dark eyes were more relaxed, not so intense, and the he was trying to compose himself. To recover from the mirth he rarely allowed himself in public. Well, he did notice when Mrs. Norris was petrified with hidden glee. The bastard thought it was the funniest thing he had ever seen.
Psychotic, really, or maybe he was just more amused with Filch, and Lockhart claiming he could actually undo it.
Or maybe he was thrilled beyond belief that Harry Potter might just get into trouble for something.
One never knew.
"Am I to believe that you have locked yourself out of your rooms, Vector?"
I glared at him.
"That you have forgotten the password, therefore, you are unable to utilize the spells to enter."
I felt a vein throbbing at my temple as I glared menacingly.
"Tell me, Vector, I need some clarification ….am I being lead to believe that you are an Arithmancer, currently in the employ of Albus Dumbledore, Headmaster of Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry, after leaving, from what I have heard…"
"From what you have stolen from Filch's employee file cabinet illegally, I gather…. "I snorted.
"Well, for light reading….anyway…after leaving a highly lucrative, yet more often than not, dangerous job at Gringotts bank as a curse breaker, a representative in the continental magical liaison office, similar to Bill Weasley, which really means you commute to exotic locales to break and enter…."
"I am not a thief it that is what you are implying you sonofa…"
"No," he said softly…"you are Vector, not Fletcher…I am implying that considering you have broken into the most dangerous and illicit of vaults, buildings, ruins, what have you…"
And then the smirk and raised eyebrow he gave me was worse, far worse than any punch in the face I had imagined leveling him with because…
His deep, rich voice slightly wavered….he was trying not to laugh…
"You can't even enter your own quarters…."
My stomach did a nosedive, but my ego beat it by just seconds.
Kill me now, Merlin, he would never let this go.
45 minutes later….
"I would help you if you would stop cursing like that barkeep at the Hog's Head," offered Snape in amusement.
"I don't want your help, Snape. If you left me alone and stopped aggravating me, I would just remember it and…"
He became silent, crossed his arms and silently beckoned me to remember or at least regain some dignity by demonstrating some amazing curse-breaking magic to open my door.
It came to nothing. I was so mad at him I couldn't concentrate. I would probably lose focus and blow up my door…and the both of us. I wouldn't even try.
I tried to retain some dignity I imagined, when I explained this to him.
"There was a time when I would have told you to go ahead for my own entertainment. I would have wished to observe it. To just go ahead, I have nothing to lose."
"And you expect me to believe that this is not the case anymore?" I spat.
"It was when I was twenty and maybe up until a couple of years ago."
"And why is that exactly?" What was his point?
He just gave me a strange look and said nothing.
"Don't do anything." He whipped out his wand.
"Hey, you, what the hell are you doing?" I screeched.
"Opening your door for you, Vector, clearly you are unable to do so."
"Don't." Merlin knew, everyone knew, that he possessed magical knowledge beyond most of us. Dark Arts and other things that we would never use…that he knew it like the back of his hand.
With my luck he would cast some damned spell in which he could randomly enter my rooms at any time of the day to just annoy me.
I wasn't taking the chance.
"Stop, er, just stop!"
"Vector, this will be quite easy. I have entered any number of places that most could not," And I hated his smug look.
"I, er, believe you, but I'd rather you didn't."
"Why would you stand out here any longer than necessary? Here…"
My latch unlocked and my door opened.
"Vector….I won't tell a soul," he replied cheekily, as if he was sooooo concerned about vouchsafing my reputation as a former Gringotts curse breaker.
"I should hope not…nor the ghosts….nor Peeves."
"That I cannot promise. They have a knack for finding everything out in this castle somehow. On one condition…"
"That being…" I threw up my hands.
"You have never invited me up for tea. I think this would be the opportune time for you to do so" in my opinion."
"Oh, you do?" I shrieked.
"Yes," he said, quite simply.
"Shut up, Snape."
"No gratitude?"
"Not if you gloat. Do you even drink tea?"
"Then tea is harmless really."
"Tea is harmless, you are NOT."
He looked at me strangely again and in silence, almost rudely expectant.
For some reason, I felt like the bastard.
So I invited him in, like the dolt I am.
He swept through the doorway after me, closed the door, and made himself comfortable at the table.
As comfortably as someone who sat rigidly upright and stiffly, with their hands tightly latched onto both armrests could.
I rolled my eyes.
I whipped out my wand and aimed it at the kettle.