Thank you for all the reviews, favs and follows, You always worry when you start a new story that no one will read it. Then you worry that everyone will hate it. Bu form the response it seems you like the first chapter. here's the second. Happy New Year everyone!
A big thank you to Eunice339 for her beta work on this chapter.
CHAPTER TWO
NATALIE'S POV
I have hardly been able to concentrate all day today. The school day has gone by too quickly. Why does time always seem to move so quickly when you don't want it to? I am about to meet Andrew in the school library, in one of the group study booths that we use. They allow students to study in small groups without getting into trouble for talking because they are semi soundproof. That way a group can still be in the library if they need to look at reference materials while they study. Trust the Erudite to always think of efficient ways for people to study more.
I am such a nervous wreck. I still don't know what I am going to say to Andrew. I don't want him to stay with me just because of the baby. I would hate it if he did that, as he would eventually grow to hate me for it. I know he has promised that he would follow me anywhere, but for some reason there is this nagging feeling at the back of my mind telling me that I shouldn't believe him completely.
I walk up to the booth that we usually study in and I see through the glass door that there is another person in there with him. It's a girl. I am trying to make out who it is, but her back is to me. The girl is wearing blue, so she is obviously from Erudite, with blonde hair, but that is about all the info I can gather from here. I walk into the booth and they immediately stop talking.
"What is she doing here?" the blonde questions.
"This is Natalie. Remember I told you, she has been helping me with my psychology homework," Andrew explains.
"It's the last week of school. Why would you still need help?" the blonde challenges.
"Jeanine, you know that I want all of my subjects to be up-to-date before we choose," Andrew calmly states.
"Well, I don't understand why you would want a Dauntless to help you. I could have helped you Andrew," Jeanine says. There was such venom in her voice when she said the word Dauntless, as if we are beneath her existence.
I don't know what her problem is, but I already don't like this girl. Luckily she isn't in Dauntless right now or I would have punched her for her comments. I don't understand why Andrew is acting the way he is. Why doesn't he just tell her that I'm his girlfriend?
"Don't you have studying you should be doing, too, Jeanine?" Andrew asks her.
"Yes, I do. So, I won't waste any more time here. Goodbye, Andrew," Jeanine says before turning her back to us.
After she exits the study booth, I sit down on a chair and look up to see that Andrew is still watching Jeanine as she walks away. "Is that a friend of yours?" I ask.
"Our parents are friends," he states noncommittally.
"Is that why you didn't introduce me?"
"Natalie, you know I can't say anything. If Jeanine knew about us, she would go running back to my parents and there would be hell to pay," he sighs.
"I would think it wouldn't matter that much at this point since we only have a week before we choose anyway," I accuse, realizing I just used the same argument as Jeanine did.
"I just don't want to upset my parents anymore than they will be when I transfer," he tries to justify.
"About that," I say, not really sure if I want to tell him about the pregnancy now. It just doesn't feel right. I am sensing something about that girl, Jeanine. "What if I said that I wanted to stay in Dauntless?"
"I thought we had talked about this and decided to pick Abnegation," Andrew says in confusion. "What has changed your mind?"
"I don't know. I have been looking at the customs of Abnegation and it worries me," I respond.
"What worries you?" he asks.
"Well," I begin. "We would have to go through a long courting process. It's not like it is in Dauntless, where you can just start living with someone right after initiation. We would have to wait to be together and then we wouldn't be able to do much more than hold hands in public and that is only after we are married," I add.
"I'm sure if we talked to the leader of Abnegation, he would let us begin courting after initiation," he says.
"Are you sure?"
"No, but we would still be together, Natalie. I don't see that this will be a huge issue," he argues.
"Do you want children?" I ask abruptly.
"Why do you ask?"
"Well, the Abnegation courting process can take some time. How old would we be before we could start to have children?"
"Natalie, you know I want to work for the government. I thought you would understand that it is more important to think about our jobs first before thinking about having children," he says, his frustration at my questions starting to show.
"That sounds like you don't really want children," I say.
"I suppose I do, eventually. I haven't really thought that much about it. We have years before we need to worry about such things," he reasons.
"Maybe," I say as I stand and start gathering my books, "I need to go. I have an appointment with my mum back in Dauntless that I don't want to be late for."
"I will see you at school tomorrow, then?" Andrew says.
"Yeah, see you at school," I say.
I walk out of the study booth as quickly as I can. I don't even kiss him goodbye. And I really feel like this is goodbye. I don't know why, but everything about today has felt off. Maybe it's the pregnancy making me feel like this. But that girl, Jeanine – I feel like she is more to Andrew than just a family friend and I got the feeling that he wasn't going to be too happy hearing the news that I am pregnant. I feel like I need to do what is best for me now, but honestly, I just don't know what that is yet.
"Now let's have a look at this baby of yours, shall we?" Dr. Morgan says cheerfully. "Hop up onto the bed for me, Natalie, and we will have a look."
I climb up onto the bed and Dr. Morgan squirts this weird gel onto my stomach. I shiver because of how cold the gel is when it contacts my skin.
"Sorry, it seems we can figure out how to freeze a person's heart so we can operate on it, but we can't figure out how to make a gel warm for the ultrasound machine," Dr. Morgan says with a chuckle, but I can't seem to find the humour in any of this.
Mum is holding my hand while we watch Dr. Morgan glide a wand through the gel over my stomach while looking at a screen attached to the wand. "Well this is interesting," Dr. Morgan says, turning the screen towards us, "Now can you see that dot?"
Mum and I look at the screen, both nodding as we see the dot that Dr. Morgan is referring to. "Well, if you look here," Dr. Morgan says while shifting the wand over a little and we see what looks like another dot, "you can see that you are having twins, Natalie. Congratulations! Now it looks to me that you are about seven weeks along, so that would mean that your babies are about the size of a blueberry."
Dr. Morgan continues to talk about the details of the pregnancy, but I don't hear anything else the doctor is saying to me. All I can think about is that I am going to be having two babies. I was worried about having one, but now it's two. How am I ever going to look after two babies? Two. I see how much of a handful Zeke is for Hana. I can't imagine having two Zekes running around. What am I going to do?
"Natalie," mum interrupts my thoughts. "Are you all right sweetheart?"
"Two. How am I going to deal with two babies?" I ask miserably.
"Is that all you heard?"
"Something about a blueberry?" I question and mum just smiles at me.
"Darling, I think it might be a good idea to get you home. The doctor has given you a lot of information to read and some vitamins to start taking. Let's get you home and if you have any more questions, you can ask the doctor at your next appointment," mum says.
"I am so glad you are here, mum. I don't think I could cope with this by myself," I say.
"Come on," mum says. "The doctor also printed out some photos of the ultrasound for you. I really would like to put one up on the fridge."
"You want to get home so you can put the ultrasound picture on the fridge? Why are you so calm? Bloody hell, mum, I'm having twins!" I exclaim, my voice getting louder as I finish the sentence.
"Well, I guess if I were you I'd be a lot more shocked too. I suppose I am just excited to know that I am getting two more grandchildren," mum says casually.
I don't even know what to say to this woman. Where has my mother gone? I know she loves being a grandma to Zeke, but this is just weird. I don't know how she can be so calm while I am freaking out over here and all she can think of is putting the picture that represents it on the fridge?
Today is the aptitude test. I am starting to feel sick with nerves. It could be the morning sickness, I'm not really sure. I am worried that the wrong person will give me the aptitude test and if my test is anything like Hana's was, I need to hope that the person will not turn my results over to Erudite. What if it's an Erudite that tests me?
I have only had brief interactions with Andrew in the week since our aborted study date, a few quick hellos in the hallway at school. Otherwise, I have avoided him as much as I can. I even skipped our last study date because I didn't know what to say. I have seen him with that Jeanine girl a few times. It is funny how I have never noticed her before now. It leaves me with a lot of questions.
I am about to walk into the lunchroom when I feel a hand on my shoulder. I turn around thinking, really hoping, that it is Andrew, but it's not. "What do you want?" I ask, a little harsher than I probably should.
"You know he is only using you, don't you?" she sneers. "Once we choose tomorrow, that will be the end of whatever you think you have. He is going to choose Erudite. Our parents have already started planning our future together."
What the hell is going on? Why didn't he tell me about this?
"That's great, Jeanine," I concede. "I hope you will be very happy together."
"Thank you," she smirks. "I am sure Andrew and I will do great things together."
"What about love? You make it sound like a business transaction," I say.
"Love? Are you serious? This is about so much more. I wouldn't call it a 'business transaction' though. It is about being on the forefront of science. Making a difference. Finally ridding our world of Divergents," Jeanine says.
"Divergents?"
"I probably shouldn't have mentioned that. But yes, we need to find a way to rid our city of the filth, starting with the Divergents. They are worse than the factionless. Andrew and I together will be able to do so much good," she says.
"But you don't love him?"
"Love is for fools," she scoffs. "These study sessions you two have been having, they are nothing. Have meant nothing to him. It was just a way to get a good grade and keep his parents happy. If he had asked someone from Erudite to help him, then his parents would have found out and he couldn't let that happen."
"Well, I suppose it is good that it is all over now," I say.
"Yes, it is," is all she says. Before I can say anything back she has walked off. I hate that girl, I knew from the moment I met her that I didn't like her, but now I know it is hate. She is dangerous and is trying to rid the city of people like my sister and maybe me. All I can think is, thank goodness I didn't tell Andrew about Hana and me.
As I continue to watch her, I see her walking up to the table where all the Erudite kids are sitting and waiting to take their aptitude test. I am seething as I watch her put a hand on Andrew's shoulder and he turns and looks at her with a smile on his face. I can't watch this anymore, so I turn to see Max and my friends from Dauntless. But they all look like they don't have a care in the world as they wait for their names to be called, whereas I feel like my world is crashing down on me.
I suddenly realize I can't be here. I need to leave. Who cares about the aptitude test? I know now without a doubt which faction I will choose tomorrow. The only thing the aptitude test is going to tell me that is relevant is whether I am Divergent or not and I can't risk that information getting out. So I run, I run from the room, down the hall and out the front doors of the school.
Screw the stupid test. Screw Jeanine. Screw Andrew. Right at this moment, I don't care which faction he chooses. I don't care! I just keep running, I love the feeling of the wind blowing through my long hair; I love the burning in my leg muscles from the exertion. I eventually stop and I am completely out of breath. I inhale large gulps of air into my lungs as I take in my surroundings. I look up and see that I am at the entrance to the Dauntless compound. I can't believe I ran all this way, but it felt really good. I finally feel alive again.
I walk inside the compound and my mother comes rushing up to me. I am still a little out of breath from my run.
"What's wrong, Natalie? Are you all right?" she asks.
"Yes. Why wouldn't I be?"
"I got a call from the school, telling me you missed your aptitude test," she says with concern. "And looking at you now, you look out of breath and flushed."
"I decided I didn't want to take the test. So, I left school and I ran," I explain.
"You ran all the way from the school back to Dauntless?"
I just nod my head yes.
"Are you insane? Why would you run all that way?"
"Mum, I don't want to talk about it."
"Well, when you are ready I hope you will come and talk to me, but right now we need to go to the infirmary."
"Why?" I ask confused. My next appointment with Dr. Morgan isn't for another few weeks. Why else would we need to go to the infirmary? I'm sure running wouldn't hurt the babies. This is all too confusing to me.
"You missed the aptitude test. I need a doctor's note to say you were ill or they will make you take the test."
"Why would that be a problem?"
"Because now you will have to have an Erudite member administer the test. I don't think I need to explain why we don't want an Erudite testing your aptitude."
"Oh," I gasp. I hadn't thought of that. I can't have anyone from Erudite administering my test and possibly learning that I am Divergent.
"Now let's go get this note so you have one less thing to worry about, Natalie."
I follow my mum to the infirmary while she tells me stories of what Zeke has been up to. I can see the excitement in her eyes. She loves being a grandma and in several months she will have three more grandchildren to fawn over.