Dear Diary
So, my long lost sister Corrin returned to us today. And everyone freaked out and IGNORED ME! Seriously! I caught a bear yesterday! A BEAR! And no one cared because the lost princess suddenly SHOWED UP out of the blue! No one ever gives me a present for showing up! All they do is groan and mutter 'Pineapple Prince' under their breath. Well, on the bright side maybe we could give Azura back to Nohr.
Oh, that's right I never told you about her! She's a princess we kidnapped to get back at Nohr for Corrin (and Ryoma's crush). But they refused because Nohr has more royals than they know what to do with. Seriously. When I was three the Nohrain royal family was HUGE. But most of them are dead now. Thank the gods for that. If there one thing I don't need in my life, its Nohrain scum! Yet they keep on entering my life! You know what! Maybe we can send them back! Yeah. I'm going to ask Hinoka about the return policy on both of them.
Well it turns out we can't return either one back from where they came from. Dang it. Well, I'm going to avoid that Nohrain for the entire day! I hate her! Even though I haven't meet her yet. WELL I KNOW I WILL! All Nohrains are evil people who live off of tomatoes and drink rotten water! The commoners, the nobles and the royals! The royals however are a whole new level of awful.
I guess now I have to describe them to you. The eldest prince's name is Xander. Only one word can be used to describe him really, and that word is communist. Seriously. That guy wants everyone to be on the same level. There are even rumors going around that he's in love with a maid! Camillia is the eldest princess and the very definition of Nohrain Scum. She has huge breasts, dotes on everyone to the point where it's creepy and rides a wyvern! A WYVERN! Who rides those things! I heard from Azama that touching one cause's rabies, so she's most likely going to die in a few years. When that happens I'll throw a huge party and invite everyone from Hoshido (expect for Azura because I don't care for NOHRAIN SCUM like her). The youngest princess is named Elise. She's the cringiest thing you'll ever see. She has socks for ponytails and is an annoying little brat who I hope dies a slow and painful death!
As for my review of Nohr's youngest prince. He gets an entire paragraph because I HATE HIM SO MUCH! His name is Leo but I like to call him stupid head. He is the very DEFINTION of an emo! He wears all black, looks at Homestuck all day, eats TOMATOS (what is wrong with him?), and is in a band (along with his retainers) called 'THE TOMATO PRINCES', which is why I'm forming my own band next week called the 'Pineapple Princes'. I'd tell you about it, but I DON'T FEEL LIKE IT!
So anyways I've got to go wax my ponytail for tomorrow's event. Yes, I do that! Do you think having hair like that happens naturally?
With hate
Takumi