Comfort

When Gajeel ends up taking a mission that essentially involves them babysitting a five year old, she ignores all of his protests and drags him off to the doctor.

Turns out, he's perfectly fine (except that his blood pressure is a bit high) and that she might have overreacted. But in her defense, Gajeel made an absolutely un-Gajeel-like decision. For as long as she's known him, he was never the kind of person to take easy missions, even if they paid a lot. And he hates kids (okay, maybe not, he's really just a big softie after all) and has no patience for dealing with them. So she doesn't think that it's far-fetched that she believed he wasn't completely fine when he agreed to that mission.

"I can't believe you made me spend the whole afternoon there! Now we're going to have to take the night train!" Gajeel complains as they walk out of the doctor's office.

"But Gajeel-kun, you were being weird," she defensively tells him.

"How is asking you to go on a mission with me weird?" he irately demands.

"You just agreed to babysit a five year old," she points out.

"We're not babysitting him. We're guarding him," he retorts.

She raises a brow and takes out the paper containing the mission details. "It says here that aside from making sure he's safe from assassins, mages must also 'sing our son a lullaby, take him out on a refreshing walk and ensure that he eats all of his vegetables and gets his hour long nap—'"

"Fine! So we have extra stuff to do! But the main job is to protect him, not babysit him," Gajeel says as he looks away, embarrassed.

"But—''

"Look, are you coming with me or not?" he exasperatedly says.

"Of course Juvia is!" she says. "She's just surprised, that's all. You hate jobs like these."

He gives a small shrug. "I'm just tired and thought that I'd take it easy for the next mission."

Juvia's lips form into a questioning frown. "Your last mission was going undercover at a hospital where you spent three days playing with a stethoscope and telling patients they had the crabs."

"It was a very dangerous mission that involved known extortionists! And some of those patients really did have the crabs!" Gajeel retorts as he stuffs his hands into his pockets and looks away. Juvia just places a hand in front of her mouth and giggles. Gajeel hates it whenever she points out how childish he can be sometimes.

"I just want to relax, okay?" he defensively says. He's not meeting her gaze and she can tell that he's hiding something. But she doesn't push it. She knows that he doesn't like it whenever someone keeps asking him questions he doesn't want to be asked.

"And also," he adds after a moment's pause. An excited grin spreads across his face. "Singing a lullaby means that I get a chance to debut my new song!"

Juvia relax, all of her apprehensions immediately disappearing. That's a more Gajeel-like reason. She grins at him. "Oh. Now everything makes so much more sense."

Gajeel leaves about halfway through the mission and doesn't return for the next few hours. Juvia spends the rest of her time with Naota, the kid they're protecting, playing games with him and helping him with his letters. He's sweet, if not a little rambunctious, but she doesn't really mind because there's nothing more she loves than spending time with kids.

He's also very excited to spend some time with someone other than his butlers and maids. She's not exactly sure but he seems very lonely. She supposes that it has something to do with his parents' jobs—his father's a businessman and is the head of one of the country's biggest trading guilds while his mother works at the mayor's office. Two assassination attempts have been made on them.

(All poison apparently; the first time, the spaghetti had too much tomato and the second time; there were three more raisins on their cookies. Juvia thinks that it has more to do with their cook than any assassination attempt.)

So it made sense for them to hire guild mages to look after their son while they were away. They're paying a lot for this mission so she doesn't really mind that they're being absolutely ridiculous and paranoid over the whole thing.

When it's almost six o'clock, Juvia starts becoming worried. Gajeel still hasn't returned yet and he hasn't called the house up to tell her where he is or when he'll be back. At this point, she's pretty sure that he didn't accept this mission because he wanted to debut his new song. It's something else—something serious.

Immediately, a million different scenarios start flashing across her mind. Maybe he got caught up and joined a dark guild during one of his undercover missions and is secretly transporting illegal weapons for them. Or maybe someone's been extorting him and now, Gajeel has taken all of the money he has from the bank to pay the person off. Or maybe, at some point, he's become an assassin and the real reason why he insisted on taking this mission was because he planned on taking someone out.

Okay, maybe that last one was a little too far-fetched. Or all of them. She shakes her head, telling herself to stop overreacting. He probably went to get some milk and got caught up with something else on the way back.

She suddenly stiffens.

What if he tripped and fell and ruptured his head on his way back? Or got mugged and shot. Or what if he got kidnapped and is systematically being tortured somewhere. Or what if he walked into a crime scene and got killed in the crossfire—

"Juvia-chan, look!"

She looks to the side and finds Naota holding up a misshapen triangle of cookie dough in his hands. The corners of her mouth lift into a smile.

"It's a volcano!" he happily says.

She turns the temperature of the stove down and stops stirring the soup. "It looks great! Put it on the tray with the rest so we could pop it into the oven."

"I made a bird and a panda too," he babbles as he leans to the left and plops the cookie dough on to the tray. He's sitting on a high chair, his legs restlessly swinging in the air. Juvia grins at him, feeling an inexplicable surge of happiness.

"What're you making?" he asks as he leans towards her.

"Beef stew," she cheerfully tells him. The cook wanted to make dinner but she insisted on doing it herself.

"There are carrots in them," he says, his nose wrinkling.

"But that's what makes it so yummy!" she says, remembering that one of the mission's specifications was to make sure that Naota ate all of his vegetables.

"I don't think so," he says, giving her a disbelieving look.

"Just try it out," she encouragingly says as she ladles a chunk of beef and a slice of carrot. She holds it out to him. He folds his arms and looks away.

"I don't wanna," he says. He pouts and stares at the window. "I wanna go and play tag and we could've if it weren't for this stupid rain."

Juvia flinches, realizes she's doing it and quickly attempts to school her features. Naota notices though.

"What's wrong?" he says.

"Nothing," she replies, looking away. She knows that he didn't mean to purposely hurt her and she should be used to it by now. But it still stings, every time, and what's so upsetting to her is that when they say those things (I hate the rain, the rain's so stupid, I wish the rain would go away, the rain's so gloomy), it's instinctive. Almost as if it's natural to hate it—to hate her.

"Come on. Time for dinner," she says, smile strained. She turns the heat off and takes a couple of bowls. Naota looks at her, clearly not convinced that she's okay. Before he can call her out on it, Juvia scoops him up and sets him on the dining table.

They spend the rest of the evening eating dinner and reading storybooks. Juvia plays hide and seek with him for a little while—Naota hides in the same spot every time but she pretends to look for him anyway. Then, he brings out all of his books and makes him read to her. He falls asleep halfway through and she carries him to his bed and tucks him in, all nice and snug.

She's in the middle of pacing back and forth in anxiety, just waiting for Gajeel to show up or call her or something when she hears footsteps from behind her.

"Juvia-chan?"

She turns around and finds Naota blearily rubbing his eyes.

"Naota-kun?" she says, moving closer.

"I can't sleep," he mumbles.

"Why? Are you afraid of the dark? Do you want me to turn on one of the lights?" Juvia asks.

"No. It's not that," he says, moving closer and clutching at her skirt. "I'm afraid of the dragon."

"Dragon?" she says, confused.

"The townspeople said they saw a dragon flying near the fields. They said it ate their sheep and cows," Naota says, his lower lip trembling in fear. "I'm scared."

Juvia blinks at him, suddenly realizing where Gajeel went off to. Or what he's been doing for the past few hours.

"Dragons…" she murmurs.

"Huh?"

She gives him a re-assuring smile.

"Come on. I'll stay with you the whole night and hold your hand. Sound good?" she says.

Naota pouts at her and says, "Don't say it like that! I'm not a baby!"

"Of course not. But do you still want me to? Be there for you I mean?" Juvia asks him.

He looks down and thinks it over.

"Yes," he finally whimpers. He holds his hands out and she takes it. When she's got him safely tucked in his bed, she tries to read him one more story but he tells her that he just wants to talk. She looks at him contemplatively as he babbles on and on about volcanoes. She doesn't want to scare him by bringing the whole dragon thing up again but she is afraid of what might've happened to Gajeel.

"So…"she says once Naota finishes his talking. "Dragons, huh?"

Naota's parents arrive late in the evening, at around eleven o'clock and by then, Gajeel still hasn't called or arrived. She chats with them for a little while and tries to pretend as if she isn't on the verge of imploding. She knows that Gajeel is more than capable of taking care of himself but she can't help but worry. Especially if her suspicions about why he's really here will be proven correct.

They ask her where Gajeel is and she gives them a vague answer about him going off to do some banking arrangements. They give her a suspicious look but she's done a good job and Naota has eaten all of his vegetables and taken his nap, so they don't ask her any more questions. They pay her the money and as she gives one last affectionate pat to a sleeping Naota, his mother pulls her aside and confidentially asks if they have any suspects for the assassination attempt. Oh right. They were also supposed to do that.

She talks about them maybe hiring a new cook and that three extra raisins aren't exactly signs of an assassination attempt but Naota's mom seems to have not heard her. When she finally finishes with settling accounts and saying goodbyes, she makes her way out of the house and directly to the newspaper stands.

What Naota said was absolutely true.

There has been a dragon sighting for the past three weeks and several sheep, cattle and other livestock have been mysteriously slaughtered and mutilated. There are even pictures.

Juvia sighs, stricken. If there are pictures then surely it must mean that there's a high chance it's really him. And maybe Gajeel met him and that's why he didn't come back because he was so excited and caught up that he just forgot about their mission all together.

She tries to force a smile out, tries to tell herself that maybe that's it.

She quickly takes her wallet out and roots around for a picture of Gajeel. She finds one—it's a picture of them at an Anthrax concert—and starts approaching people, asking them if they've seen him around. People rudely brush her off or say no, they haven't seen him, but she doesn't allow herself to be discouraged. She walks through the rain, umbrella in hand, asking person after person until finally, a portly old man waiting by a carriage stop tells her, "Yeah, I saw him. He went to Marky's. Saddest fellow I've ever seen. Really felt sorry for him."

Juvia's chest constricts into a little squeeze and her hands subconsciously clench around the photograph.

So Gajeel didn't find him.

She's suddenly, inexplicably sad. She's been with him during times when he's received false alarms. He likes to act as if it doesn't bother him but she knows that it does. It hurts him and upsets him because he gets all of his hopes up and tries so hard only for everything to get thrown back into his face.

She's desperate to find Gajeel—all she really wants to do is to give him a hug and tell him that she's there for him (even though he'll probably complain or push her away). She tucks the photograph in her dress pocket and asks the portly man for some directions before moving along her way.

When she gets to Marky's, she's brought with her stuff that Gajeel needs—an entire tin full of mint cookies, a guitar pick, the newest album of his favorite band and an accompanying poster, a thick, leather jacket, a bottle of coconut shampoo and a bouquet of flowers.

Okay, fine. So maybe, he doesn't need all this stuff. But what he does need is all the comfort he can get.

"Gajeel-kun!" she wails when she finds him sitting at a corner table, alone and brooding.

He looks up, eyes widening at the mountain of stuff she has in her arms.

"Juvia—ow! Fuck!''

"Gajeel-kun! Don't worry! Juvia's here! It's all going to be okay!" she says as she tackles him into a hug and all the stuff comes crashing into his chest and around them. Then, suddenly, she realizes that she's just spent the past few hours out of her mind with worry and anger starts bubble up from inside her.

"What—''

"And where were you? How dare you just go off and not tell Juvia where you were? Do you have any idea how worried Juvia was?" she explodes as she places her hands on her hips and glares at him.

"Calm down, woman. I'm fine, aren't I?" he gruffly says.

"Still! You never thought to leave Juvia a message?" she retorts.

He looks away, guilty. "It's not like I wasn't going to go back and just leave you in a lurch."

"Gajeel-kun, it's nearly midnight," she tells him.

"So it slipped my mind. Whatever," he says, his eyes resolutely on the tabletop. Juvia blinks at him, trying to gauge the expression on his face. Finally, after a few moments of tense silence, Gajeel mutters a barely audible, "Sorry."

She looks at him in surprise, caught off guard that he actually bothered to apologize.

"W-What?"

"You heard me the first time!" he irritably says. He gestures at the pile of stuff on the table and on his lap. "And what the fuck is all this?"

"It's for you!" she brightly tells him.

He picks up the bouquet of flowers and gives her an incredulous look. "Why would I want a bouquet of flowers?"

Okay, so maybe she jumped the gun when she bought that.

"It's so you'd feel better!" she defensively says.

He stiffens, an unreadable look on his face. "Why would I need to feel better? I'm perfectly fine."

"Look, Gajeel-kun. You can stop pretending. Juvia knows and she just wants you to know that she's here for you no matter—''

"I don't need anyone to be here for me because nothing's wrong," he roughly interrupts. He stands up and moves past her. "I'm going out for a walk."

Oh god. She's doing it all wrong. Gajeel hasn't been upset upset for a long time that she's forgotten how he can be when he's like this. She shouldn't have gone into it, immediately declaring that she knows why he's so sad and broody. The thing with Gajeel is, he has his own very distinct process for dealing with disappointing situations. She can't make it obvious that she knows something is wrong or express sympathy for him. Or ask him how he's feeling.

Like there was one time, when he mucked a mission up and Master Jose punished him really bad. He showed up in her apartment and said he wanted to do karaoke and she stupidly asked him, "What happened?" And then he exploded and went on a long rant about how he just wanted to spend time with his best friend and drink beer and sing all of his favorite songs all night long and can't he want that without there being something wrong?

Generally, she's learned that the best thing to do whenever he's being like this is to be subtle and just let him tell her about it in his own time.

Which is probably why buying him all this stuff wasn't the best idea.

He suddenly comes back and grabs everything but the flowers. "But I think I'll take these."

"Gajeel-kun, wait!" Juvia says as she scrambles after him. "At least bring my umbrella with you!"

She follows him outside, ignoring the torrent of rain pouring down on her. It's been growing stronger since she's figured out that he didn't find Metallicana.

Gajeel ignores her, all of the stuff she's bought him shoved into a Marky's plastic bag. He's purposefully striding away from her, his hair wet and sticking to his face.

"Gajeel-kun!" She reluctantly moves towards him, trying to think of a subtle way of comforting him.

"Do you want a hug?" she finally asks him.

"No!"

Juvia cringes. So much for being subtle.

"But—''

"Leave me alone! Didn't I tell you that I'm fine?" he irritably says.

"Please, Gajeel-kun. Juvia's sorry she assumed that anything was ever wrong," she says as she gives a short bow and opens her umbrella. "Let's go back inside. Please."

"I want to get some fresh air," he stubbornly says.

"It's raining."

"I don't care. Just leave me alone."

"Then at least take my umbrella. You need it more than me. You'll get sick," she pleads.

"I don't need it."

"Gajeel-kun—''

"Look, I'm fine okay? It's no big deal!" He stuffs his hands in his pockets. "I already expected it anyway. All those rumors are always never true."

"But you don't know that! Maybe…maybe this time, it's really him! Well…there were sightings and pictures and the sheep were even—''

"It was just an abnormally large bird. And the sheep and cattle slaughters were done by some psycho," Gajeel mutters.

"Maybe he's still here somewhere. Maybe you missed something. The pictures, they really looked like—''

"It was a bird, Juvia. A bird. You know me. I'm very thorough."

"But...but that doesn't mean he's still not out there somewhere! So he's not here. But he must be somewhere else. He must be. Juvia…Juvia will help you, okay? We'll look at all the news articles and the rumours. He's out there somewhere—''

"Bullshit! He's not! He's not! If he were out there somewhere, then why the fuck is he still hiding? Why? Why hasn't he come home yet!?" Gajeel's voice is strained, almost as if it physically pains him to say the words. Juvia stares at him, slightly afraid. She's never seen him this mad or upset before.

"Juvia's perfectly sure that there's a good reason why we haven't found him yet—''

"It's because he doesn't want us to! He doesn't want us to! That's why!" He turns away from her and starts pacing back and forth, the wind nipping at his face. "And here I am…actually searching for that selfish prick and he doesn't even want me to find him…"

"He can't be doing it on purpose—''

"If he wanted me to find him, if…if he wanted to come back…it would've happened years ago. Forget it. He doesn't want me. If he did…he wouldn't have left in the first place," he says, shoulders sagging.

"Juvia's sure that, that's not the reason why he left. People don't just leave for no reason at all. He must've done so with your best interests at heart—''

"No. If he had my best interests at heart he wouldn't fucking up and leave without telling me where he's going or when he'll be back—''

"You mean just like what you did today?"

"Shut up! That's different. I was going to go back for you."

"Gajeel-kun, Juvia knows you're hurt and angry—''

"Stop it. Stop acting like you know how I feel," Gajeel snaps.

"But Juvia does know what you feel. When her parents died—''

"That's different. Better a dead father than a father that doesn't want you," he spits out.

Silence.

Juvia blinks at him, trying to tell herself that he didn't mean it. That he's just lashing out because he couldn't find Metallicana.

"I'm sorry," Gajeel finally says.

Juvia raises her brows in surprise. "That's a first."

"What?"

"Getting two apologies from you in the same day," she says in an attempt to lighten the mood. She moves closer to him so that she's holding the umbrella over both their heads. "But you're right. Juvia doesn't know how you feel. She doesn't even know why Metallicana left or why he hasn't come back. But what she does know is…that no matter what…you can always count on at least one person to be there for you. Me."

He doesn't say anything for a long time. He's turning the bag of stuff over in his hands, eyes hurt and brows drawn.

"You should've told me about this," Juvia softly tells him.

"So what? You could feel sorry for me when we find out that he isn't here. Again?" he demands.

"So you won't have to deal with the disappointment alone," she says. The harsh look in his eyes slightly softens. After a few more moments of tense silence, she finally says, "Come on. Let's go home."

"Okay." Gajeel nods. The two of them start walking to the train station.

"You know…you probably don't want to hear this but…Juvia is one hundred percent sure that Metallicana loves you very much and had a good reason for leaving you."

To her surprise, instead of cutting her off, he actually looks at her from the corner of his eye.

"How would you know?" he gruffly says.

"Juvia's heard all the stories you told her about him, remember? And from what she knows….he loves you, Gajeel-kun. And one day….she just knows….you'll see him again. Don't give up or lose hope," she tells him. And she means it too. She's not just saying it to make him feel better. She's heard stories of Metallicana, knows how fondly Gajeel speaks about him. Metallicana was a good father. And Gajeel's a good person and he's been through a lot. She just knows that someday things will work out for him and he'll get all of the answers he needs.

"Yeah?"

"Yeah."

"Thanks, Sprinkler," he says as he gives her a small punch on the arm.

They walk together in complete silence, Gajeel's lips are thinly pressed together, almost as if he's wrestling with a particularly difficult problem.

"Juvia?"

"Hm?"

He looks away, embarrassed. "Can I still get that hug?"

"Of course!" Juvia squeals as she tackles him into hug, water sploshing all around them.

"Ow! Okay! Okay! That's enough! Get off me!"

He stops squirming as Juvia pulls him closer, her head comfortably nestled against his chest. He relaxes and she can tell that for the first time since this whole thing's started, he's finally allowing himself to fall apart. Okay, maybe not. Gajeel never falls apart. But he's allowing her to help at least.

"Crazy woman," he mutters and she smiles.