It had been 6 weeks since Serena had last seen or heard from Bernie. Serena had no idea where Bernie was or if she was even safe. She was forced to continue the running of the ward on her own in Bernie's absence and was not coping well. Receiving no information from Hassen as he insisted he was not able to discuss such matters on the trauma surgeon's whereabouts.
The first few weeks were the worst; Serena made frequent visits to her office hoping to find Bernie in her office chair, countless calls, emails, texts and voicemails asking her to get in touch, before finally. Week 6, where Serena had accepted that Bernie had once again done what Bernie does best. Ran.
I can't believe she has done this to me again, what was I thinking letting her back into my life after Ukraine, I can't believe I've been so stupid. She did seem genuinely shocked to be pregnant, I wonder if she's told Marcus yet, maybe that's why she's ran off, ran back to Marcus ready to play happy families again and live happily every after. Uggghhhh how many times have I said to keep work and love life separate, AND I GO AND BREAK MY OWN RULE! Serena's mind was in overdrive. Could things possibly get any worse!
She was mid way through her shift when Raff approached her, ''Serena, I've been looking for you everywhere, I think you should come with me. . .
It's Elinor.'' Serena's stomach sank as Raff explained he had taken the red phone call which stated that Elinor had been involved in a car accident and was on her way in by ambulance. Serena ran faster than she ever had to the entrance of the hospital to see the ambulance arriving. ''It's okay darling, I'm here, your going to be absolutely fine, I've got you.'' She kissed the top of her daughters head as they wheeled her through to the lift. ''SHES LOST SO MUCH BLOOD'' Serena stated, assessing her injuries. Serena was visibly shaken and in shock. The medical professional in her diminished at the sight of her daughters wounded body in front of her. Panic overtook as she cried and tried to focus enough to help make things better. Fletch stepped in ''Serena maybe you should wait outside, okay we'll come and get you straight away.''
''I'm not leaving her'' she snapped at the nurse.
''Serena'' Raff tried cautiously placing a gentle hand on her shoulder.
''I'M NOT LEAVING HER'' She shouted louder. No sooner had she said it the monitors began beeping. Serena looked up in horror. ''She's crashed'' he shouted calmly and staff began running around connecting tubes and monitors to the young girl in front of them. At this point Ric appeared behind her. He spun her round into a comforting hug and walked her out of the room whilst she sobbed into his chest, shouting out the word ''NO.'' and fighting against his hold I attempt to stay in the treatment room. After what had seemed like a lifetime, Raff and Fletch stepped outside of the room, no words needed to be spoken, just one look said it all. ''Nooooooooooooo'' Serena shouted as she turned and sobbed into Ric's chest holding on to a fistful of his shirt. Serena cried uncontrollably whilst Ric, Raff and Fletch attempted unsuccessfully to comfort her. Serena was a broken woman. She had lost the 2 most precious things in her life in the last few weeks. Raff took Fletch to the side, ''I think we should contact Bernie, she should be here'' he whispered to his co-worker together they looked at a curled up Serena sitting on the floor of the treatment room containing her daughters body feeling utterly helpless.
Serena had managed to compose herself slightly to stand and say her final goodbyes. I'm not ready, she thought. I can't, it's too soon, I want more time with her. She thought to herself as she stroked her daughter's hair and placed kissed on her hands. This can't be happening, she's 21, she's still got so much to live for. I want to see her get married, have grandchildren, how has this happened?
Serena walked, not really aware of her surroundings. Her feet seemed to carry her to the once shared office. Serena slowly closed the door and sat on her office chair. She sat for a second, she felt numb, not really sure what she should do next. Then her eyes glanced over a photo placed on her desk. It was Elinor, aged 16 in her prom dress. Serena let out a loud sob: emotion, shock and grief for her beautiful girl consumed her. The pain in her chest unbearable as she broke down, holding her head in her hands. Serena remained in her office for hours, needing some time alone, to be left to process what had just happened in her own time, in her own way. Knocks at the door came and went as she came to terms with the loss of her daughter. She couldn't face leaving and going home to an empty home, full of photographs and memories of Elinor. But the lack of privacy as more people knocked to offer words of comfort was torturous and she ignored each and every one of them.
Absorbed in grief, Serena did not notice the door opening ever so slowly and quietly. In entered Bernie, her hair was messy but tousled ever so softly and sad big hazel eyes and an omissible pregnancy bump. She was nearly 32 weeks now.
''Serena'' Bernie spoke first. Her voice was soft and small, barely a whisper. ''I came as soon as I'd heard, Serena I'm so SO sorry'' the words are you okay were on the tip of her tongue before she realised that it was a stupid question. Stuttering slightly, no other words came and it was all Bernie could do to race over to Serena and wrap her arms around her tightly. Serena sobbed into Bernie's shoulder and Bernie squeezed Serena tighter. Serena retreated from Bernie's embrace and Bernie began to wipe away the tears from Serena's face using her thumb.