A/N: Dear readers, thank you so much for your positive reviews and interest in my first SVU fic. You've made me so very welcome in this fandom. And so, the story continues …..
Something about the tone of her voice made him rush back to her. He burst into Tess' bedroom and blurted out, "Bus is on its way. She okay?" He was asking about their suspect, but his eyes were only on Olivia. She sat, on the edge of Tess' bed, hand over her mouth, eyes dazed. "Liv?" Elliot was quickly by her side, ignoring Mrs. Morgan behind him.
Olivia shook her head and lifted her dark eyes to Elliot's blue ones. He stumbled back at the raw pain that radiated from their depths. "What's going on?" he asked, as he crouched down beside her. For a moment, he glimpsed an infinitesimal truth, an unchecked twinkling of honesty but just as quickly as it had passed across her face, it was gone and he wondered if he'd imagined it. She sat stoically, composure regained and looked at him, then at Tess' mother.
"Mrs. Morgan, your daughter is experiencing a post-partum hemorrhage. She gave birth to a baby during her prom last night, then drowned her in the toilet. I suggest you hire a lawyer." Her voice was cold and controlled, her face a mask. "I'm going to have to arrest your daughter for murder."
"What? No, you're wrong!" Mrs. Morgan stumbled back in shock and put her hands to her heart. "Tessie, Tessie, what is she talking about?" As mother went to comfort her child and shield her from the detective's harshness, Olivia stood and moved away from the bedside.
"But I was raped. It wasn't my fault," Tess cried out from her bed. "Detective Olivia, please, it wasn't my fault." Tess' agonized sobs joined those of her mother's, and the two tearful women looked at Olivia as their entire world crashed around them.
"You were raped?" Elliot asked, appalled. "Liv, she's a victim too."
"She's a murderer," Olivia replied, her face betraying no emotion whatsoever.
Elliot was confused and stared at his partner in astonishment. Olivia was the champion of victim's rights, a natural born comforter, a woman who often shed tears of solidarity with rape victims, and who gave them a sympathetic shoulder to cry on. He couldn't find that Olivia in the compassionless cop before him. His eyes popped widely in shock as Liv drew the cuffs out of her back pocket and faced the terrified teenager. "Wait!" he gasped as he blocked her way. He searched her face but there was nothing. Nothing there at all, just a cold, hard stare. He grabbed the cuffs out of her hand and stuffed them into his jacket pocket. "Not yet! The bus hasn't even gotten here yet; she needs medical attention! And, there's the matter of the rape," he reminded her. "She was raped, Liv."
Liv shoved Elliot aside and got into Tess' face. "Did you report it?" When did it happen? Who raped you? Did you tell anybody? Did you go to the hospital?" She fired the questions in quick succession, not giving the girl a chance to reply.
Tess began sobbing harder and clung to her mother, burying her face in her mother's bosom. "Make her go away, please," she pleaded.
"Liv, come 'ere," Elliot said, as he motioned for her to exit the room. He wondered what the hell was going on with her, but didn't want to start questioning her in front of the victim-suspect. Elliot gently pushed her aside and sat on the edge of Tess' bed. "Can you talk to me, Tess?" he asked in a gentle, paternal voice. She was just a kid, after all, younger than his two oldest daughters. She had a teddy bear clutched to her tummy for god sakes.
"I can't," she whimpered. Before Elliot could respond, the EMT's came barging into the room and began to examine Tess. While Tess was assessed and then moved onto a stretcher, Elliot once again tried to speak to Olivia. They walked behind the EMT's and watched as they loaded Tess into an ambulance.
"What's going on with you?" he asked.
"With me? Nothing. You're the one who isn't arresting that girl for killing her baby. She admitted to it."
"Yeah, but…she was raped, Liv. We need to deal with that too and find the perp. Why the sudden rush to arrest her? They're taking her to the hospital. We can question her after she's been treated by a doctor."
Olivia couldn't contradict his logic, nor could she understand her own frenzied feelings. Whatever sympathy she'd felt for Tess had vanished the moment the girl had admitted that she hated her baby and wanted her dead. In fact, she felt such a surge of inexplicable anger that it had frightened her. Never, ever, had she questioned a rape victim so harshly, so cruelly. She winced as she recalled her inappropriate interview tactics with the scared girl.
"I only want justice for that baby, Elliot," she sighed.
"I get that," he replied, as they got into the car and followed the ambulance. "And we also need to find justice for Tess."
When they arrived at the hospital, they were informed by the doctor that Tess needed an emergency D&C, because a piece of her placenta had broken off and remained inside, causing bleeding and infection. There was nothing they could do but wait for her to come out of surgery.
Olivia and Elliot sat side by side in the day surgery waiting room, a small area with plastic orange chairs, a TV blaring in the corner and an old vending machine. Elliot finally broke the silence. "You wanna tell me what happened with Tess?" he probed again, more gently this time. His voice was soft and he didn't make eye contact, just stared at his lap, waiting for her response. Harsh confrontations didn't work with Olivia. He felt her shrug but she said nothing.
"Liv? I never saw you go off on a victim like that."
Olivia stood up, stretched her back and walked toward the vending machine. She popped some coins in and pulled out a Pepsi, then repeated her actions. She handed the second pop to Elliot. "Caffeine and sugar fix?" He nodded and they both popped the soda tabs open and took long, thirsty gulps. Elliot studied her as he awaited her reply. She looked tired and disheveled, the lack of sleep apparent by the dark smudges beneath her eyes. Her face was devoid of makeup and he could make out a light dusting of sun spots across her cheeks. He felt a surge of affection for her, and fought the urge to put a comforting hand on her shoulder, for she appeared to need reassurance right now.
"Is it the case?" he asked her, needing more from her than this maddening silence.
She glanced up at him and her eyes met his, then looked away, unable to bear the scrutiny of his gaze. "She killed a baby, Elliot. You seem to be glossing over that fact."
"I'm not!" He held his hands up in defense and shook his head. "But the rape case …"
She cut him off, "You know the rape case is going to prove impossible to prosecute. There's no rape kit, it happened nine months ago, she never said a word, and it'll be her word against his. If we can ever find him, that is."
"So you just want to ignore it?" he asked incredulously, eyebrows shooting up to his receding hairline.
"We can investigate it but it doesn't mitigate her crime. We can arrest her and look into her rape claims," she replied evenly, her face impassive.
"Doesn't mitigate her crime? Are you serious, Olivia? We're talking about a teenaged girl who was so traumatized by a rape that she concealed her pregnancy because she couldn't face it. Even from her own mother! She gave birth on a toilet during her prom. She was in denial."
She stared at him. "Are you excusing what she did?" The memory of that perfectly still dead baby on the bathroom tiles rose to her mind's eye. She screwed her eyelids tightly for a few seconds and took a step away from Elliot.
For his part, Elliot realized he'd stepped into a landmine with Olivia. Her nostrils were flaring, which was never a good sign. "She could've had an abortion," Olivia told him.
"Yeah well, with a Catholic upbringing …" he trailed off.
"What, Catholics can't ever get abortions?" she challenged him.
"According to the tenants of the faith, no," he informed her. "But you know, most Catholics are like me. We condone them in cases of incest of rape, so she could have received absolution."
"Is that what you're giving her? Absolution?" she was in his face now, voice shrill.
"It's not up to me; I'm not a priest," he told her. He didn't like having his faith challenged and he didn't like discussing abortion. He knew Liv was pro-choice and didn't subscribe to any religion. These arguments never went well between them.
"But you think abortion is permissible in cases of incest," she prodded.
"And rape. Incest and rape," he confirmed. He realized his mistake the moment it came out of his mouth. "No, wait, I mean …," he reached out to touch her arm but she shrugged him off.
"Fuck you, Stabler! That's why you won't charge her with murder. The victim was a product of rape and that makes her death okay to you." She began to storm off but he caught up with her in the hallway.
"That's not what I meant." He tried to formulate the words but his brain came up blank when faced with the fury in Olivia's eyes. Her cheeks were flushed and tears threatened to spill. She sniffled and wiped her nose on her sleeve.
"Don't try to justify this with your religious beliefs, Elliot. Either you're pro-choice, or you're not. Either a woman has free reign over her body, or she doesn't. You either believe abortion is murder or it isn't. Your brand of lukewarm bullshit singles out that baby because of how she was conceived."
Elliot flinched at her words, her tone, and at the raw hurt in her voice. "No, I mean, it's complicated."
She nodded. "I get it. It's a matter of worth. That baby wasn't worth a damn to Tess. Wasn't worth a damn to anybody. Even your priest would give bloody absolution for her termination." Olivia turned around, her shoulders sagging and staggered toward the hospital exit. She swiped angrily at her falling tears and sped up her steps.
"Olivia, wait!" Elliot ran up to her but she kept on going.
"Don't bother. I'm not worth it," she threw out.
He stared at her retreating back and ran his hands over his face, unable to follow her.