Disclaimer: See last chapter

~ Chapter Two ~

Sonny lightly dabbed the foundation down on her black eye, hoping that she could cover it up. She wasn't sure if she could handle all the questions that were going to be aimed at her. She wondered if Tawni had noticed that Sonny wasn't at the party, if she had gone without her anyway, without worrying. She bit down on her lip as she thought about ditching Tawni at that party, knowing she had no choice.

She bit down as hard as she could on her lip when she felt tears threatening to fall from her dull, brown eyes as she looked at her own reflection, finding herself wishing that she had never gone. She only went to impress Chad, she only went because he asked her to.

She shook her head, if she hadn't been so caught up in her own feelings for the one boy who would probably never see her in that way, then she wouldn't have gone, she wouldn't have worn that short skirt and she wouldn't have been raped. She blamed herself.

She heaved a deep sigh before running out of her room, knowing she was going to be late for her first day back at work since.. it happened. She shuddered a little, shaking her head as tears glazed her eyes once more. Two whole days had passed, and she hadn't been able to say a word.

She found herself glad that her mum had moved back to Wisconsin last month, she preferred to be alone, she preferred the quiet. She let it all consume her as she sat in her bedroom, slightly rocking back and forth as the tears never seemed to stop carving their way down her pale, bruised face.

She welcomed the night time, she loved being able to sit in the darkness and pretend like nothing had ever happened to her. She just liked to look out of her window at the beautiful stars and moon and now that somewhere out there, people were happy – even when she wasn't.

She had been dreading today since it had happened, but she knew that she had to carry on living, as hard as it seemed.. she had to pretend like it never happened. She wondered that if she pretended for long enough, then she would start to believe it as well. Maybe.

- - - - - - - -

"Sonny!" Sonny stopped in her tracks, turning around to face Tawni as she shook her head.

"Where have you been? I haven't seen or heard from you since that party?" Sonny just looked down at the floor,

"What happened?" She bit down on her lip, finally looking back up after a few moments of silence between the two, only to see Tawni still standing there with her hands on her hips, staring at her. Sonny gulped a little, not knowing what to say as she tried to conjure up a word – any word – in her mind.

She took an unconscious step backwards when Tawni and sighed and walked towards her, suddenly feeling uneasy.

"What's going on with you?" Sonny just shook her head, knowing the right card to play to get Tawni to leave her alone -

"You don't care, do you?" She tried to smile, sighing in relief when Tawni scoffed and then shook her head,

"I don't do caring Sonny, you should know that." Sonny just shrugged and then walked past her,

"Class is this way?" Tawni rolled her eyes, pointing in the opposite direction, biting down on her lip when Sonny just nodded and turned back around to walk with her. It was a one sided conversation all the way there as Tawni went on and on about how pretty she was and how much fun the party was.

Sonny closed her eyes in relief when they finally got into the classroom, she used to hate school but now she knows that she had to do everything and anything she can to make sure that she doesn't think about that time. She needed to distract herself.

"Long time no see Munroe." She jumps a little as she hears his voice just behind her before he takes the seat next to her. She had almost forgotten that MacKenzie Falls was in school with them now. He grinned at her, getting out all of his books as Sonny just nodded and looked down at the desk, staring at in intently as she tried to avoid any eye contact with anyone.

She wondered if Chad had ever liked her, but then realized she didn't even care anymore. It didn't matter, she didn't even like herself. She hated herself for letting that boy do something to her that she promised would never happen to herself, she was convinced she could have done something to stop him and she had to live with that for the rest of her life.

She didn't want anyone to find out, she didn't want people to carry on believing that poor, naïve Sonny was completely incapable of looking after herself at her first – and last – Hollywood party. She didn't want anyone to know how stupid she had been, she knew they would all blame her for it, for letting him do that to her when she could have so easily asked someone for help. She didn't even understand why she didn't scream or run and she didn't expect anyone else to understand.

"Aren't you going to talk to me today?" Chad flashed her his best smile, finding himself missing their daily little arguments as he reached out for her head and lightly placed his hand on top of it. Sonny jumped a little, yanking her hand back as quickly as she could and turned away from him. Her whole body shook as she thought about someone touching her, closing her eyes tightly – she tried to calm herself down. She knew that everyone would find out if she carried on like that, they were all going to guess.

"What the hell Munroe? What did I do?"

"Just get on with your work." She muttered, grabbing her pen again and writing down everything Mrs Bitterman had written on the board.

"Whatever Sonshine, I was only asking." He rolled his eyes, turning around and whispering something to someone behind them. Sonny could feel tears blur her vision as she thought about how some people just couldn't seem to mind their own business.

She closed her eyes as the whispers seemed to be getting louder and louder, trying to focus on her work, trying to ignore everyone. She looks up at Chad, whispering something to Tawni and Nico, shaking his head. She can see the looks on their faces, and she watches Grady behind them.

She sighs, bites down on her lip before grabbing everything and running out of there as fast as she can. She can't handle everyone knowing, she can't handle people staring at her and just knowing.

She finally let the tears fall down her face as she runs away from it all, from everyone who thinks that they know what happened, from the watching eyes and the suspicious whispers.

She slams the door to her dressing room, sliding down the door as sobs wrack her already shaking body. She closes her eyes as she tries to think about all those times she could have screamed or ran away, all those chances she had but had never taken.

Tears stung her eyes again as she thought about it all, telling herself that she deserved it because she didn't fight him off. She believed it was all her fault.

She looked up for a moment, around at the room she had once loved so much, the room she never believed she would be in and the room that felt so good to call her own. But nothing was good anymore, nothing felt the same as it did before. She let the secret eat away at her, but she couldn't tell anyone, she didn't want anyone else to be hurt.

She wiped away the hot tears as they fell from her eyes, shaking her head as she slowly got up and walked over to the settee.

"Why me?" She whispered to herself,

"Why did it have to happen to me?"