The Sharpest Lives Pt2
A light to burn all the empires
So bright the sun is ashamed to rise and be
In love with all of these vampires
So you can leave like the sane abandoned me

There's a place in the dark where the animals go
You can take off your skin in the cannibal glow
Juliet loves the beat and the lust it commands
Drop the dagger and lather the blood on your hands, Romeo

I've really been on a bender and it shows
So why don't you blow me a kiss before she goes?

APOV:

"Do you think you'll ever be able to forgive me?" Alec asks the Warlock, unconciously scooting backwards a little as his fear of rejection gets the best of him. He can see as Magnus hesitates and he takes a shaky breath. "I don't think.." Magnus starts. "I don't think this is a conversation we should have right now. In the morning.. when you're sober.."

Alec shakes his head. "I'm sober enough," he slurs. "Just please," he looks down. "Tell me what I have to do.. If there is anything I can do.. Even if we never get back together, I need to know that you arn't mad at me anymore.. That you'll remember me, you know if you want to remember me cause you don't have too obviously," he is really rambling at this point. "But like if you were too, that you'd at least not hate the memory. That would kill me- well I guess I'd already be dead wouldn't I? But-" "Alexander," Magnus interrupts, exasperation clear in his voice. Alec shuts up quickly, realizing he's probably immensley annoying his ex boyfriend.

Magnus though, moves closer to him surprising him. "You really are drunk arn't you?" He asks, his cat eyes looking at Alec with an emotion the boy couldn't quite place. "No I-" "Alec, I've forgiven you. I did a long time ago, okay? It.. wasn't your fault. I told you I cared about you earlier-" "You told me you loved me at the Subway station too but that didn't change anything," Alec mutters bitterly. Magnus narrows his eyes. "I'd appreciate it if you'd let me finish. What I meant was," Alec lets his fingers be intertwined with Magnus'. "I told you I cared about you. But if I cared about you, or loved you as you said, as much I said I did I would have trusted you from the beginning. But I didn't. And for that, I'm sorry," Magnus averts his eyes. Alec analyzes everything he says as if he's a teenage girl on her first date.

"I'm ready to trust you now though," The Warlock says after a few moments of silence. "If," Magnus swallows, seeming nervous as he looks back up. "You'd be willing to give me another chance that is."

Alec looks at him disbelief. "You broke up with me, remember?" He says quietly. As an unexperienced, young and in love with boy, another chance is exactly what he is going to give Magnus. He needs Magnus as well as he's all he has left at this point. "I remember Alexander," Magnus whispers.

MPOV:

Magnus definitley remembered. But- "Is that a yes?" He asks, not completely sure. Alec nods. "Oh thank God," he mutters, grabbing the boy around his waist and pulling him for a kiss. Alexander wraps them both in the blanket as he wraps his arms around Magnus' neck. Which is fine until they start lying down until Magnus was on top of Alec, deepening the kiss.

"Alec," He tugs at the blanket. "Come on, I'll keep you warm," he winks. He is just wanting full movement, which is hard with Magnus trapped under a too warm blanket. Honestly how has Alec been laying with this on him the last two hours? So he is surprised when Alec starts to pull a way, looking a like a startled deer. "Darling?" He raises an eyebrow, confused at the sudden change of heart. "I'm sorry. I wasn't trying to get your clothes off or anything," he trails a nuckle down the side of his, finally, newly re-appointed boyfriend. He had rolled off Alexander, and is trapped on his side in between him and the back of the couch. Alec has wrapped himself back into the damn blanket. "I know you are probably not ready for that again quite ye-"

"No," Alec looks at him quickly, startling Magnus so he pulls his hand back,then goes red as he hears how loud he'd been. "I mean, no," he says more calmly. "It's not that.. Well. I don't want to do it right this second, but it's got nothing to do with you I promise. I-I'm just cold and I'm kind of tired now that I think about it. Arn't you? Why don't we go to bed? I've missed sleeping with you," he freezes. "I mean sleeping.. in the same bed. Not that I haven't missed the other," he adds quickly. "That's just not all I've missed and-" Magnus puts a finger on his lips, shushing him, making the boy go redder. "Calm down Alexander," he pulls back his hand, pecking the Shadowhunter's lip. "It's fine. Yes, we can go to bed if that's what you wish."

Alec smiles weakly making Magnus' heart skip a beat when he sees it. It has been so long since he saw Alec smile. But the boy is hiding something. He just doesn't know what. "Thank you." Magnus nods, standing. He offers a hand to Alec who acts as if he didn't see it when he gets up and starts towards the bedroom. The yellow duvet is taking up both of his hands. Magnus is starting to regret giving a him a blanket.

Magnus watches almost in slow motion as Alexander crashes to the ground, tangled in the goddamn blanket, looking stunned as he falls. It's funny how a person can drink, walk around a while even, then sit down and get up and face plant. Well not funny right now, but more sometimes still surprising in Magnus' long life that is running out of surprised.

"Alexander!" He kneels beside him. "Are you okay baby? God, you're more drunk then I thought. Please tell me you don't walk the streets like this." Alec looks away, obviously guilty. Magnus sighs, exasperated. Well, he wouldn't be doing it anymore if Magnus has anything to do with it. "Come on," Magnus lifts Alec into his arms bridal style. "Upsy..Alec," He grins. But it slowly slips off his face.

The blanket lay abanoned on the floor as Magnus takes in what exactly Alec has been hiding from him all night. Alec who had also been smiling loopily, slowly stops, realizing what has happened. He struggles in Magnus' arms. "Magnus," The boy frowns, trying his best to get his boyfriend to release him. Magnus only holds him tighter though.

Magnus carries Alexander despite his protests to his, well their's again he guesses, room. He sets the boy on the bed and Alec immediately makes a dive to for the door, but Magnus is anticipating this. He catches the boy in his arms again. "Alec," he whispers. "Please, you promised me till morning at leasts. You can't even walk." Alec pulls at his arms weakly for a few more seconds before finally giving up. Magnus loosens his grip on on Alec and once he's sure the boy won't try to dart again, drop his arms completely.

The two boys are sitting criss cross, facing each other. Magnus is staring straight at Alec and Alec is looking anywhere but Magnus. "I'm not going to ask why," Magnus says after a few minutes. "I'm guessing I've heard the reasons?" He waits for Alec to affirm, getting a weak nod. "Then.. can I at least ask you don't do it again?"

Alec finally meets Magnus' eyes now, looking pained. "I mean you can ask..." He bites his lip. Magnus frowns. "What's that supposed to mean?" "It means.. I don't know if I can? Just like that.. you know?" Magnus takes the words in slowly, letting them sink in before he responds.

"I don't know.." Magnus shakes his head. "I've never.. had the desire before. I wish you never did," he takes Alec's hand gently. He says this even though he knows there is no use in wishing, what's done is done. He feels slightly guilty though, again wishing, he had never broken up with Alec. If he hadn't, would Alec ever have felt the need to do this? He guesses there is only one thing to do now though. Just make sure Alec knows he's there and make sure he stops this.

"Could you do me a favor at least?" When Alec doesn't respond with anything more than a wary glance, Magnus continues. "Come to me? Whenever you want to do this.. I love you Alec.." Alec opens his mouth but then Magnus remembers why he brought him here in the first place as his mind races. Not only because of how drunk he was. But because of the comment. The one about not being able to do it anymore.

"What were you planning on doing tonight.. if I had not brought you here?" He asks quietly before Alexander can respond. Alec opens his mouth and then closes, seeming to consider whether to answer or not. "The truth?" 'No Alec, please tell me all your pretty lies. I'm sure you have plenty of them in this area.' Magnus stops this bitter trail of thought. Alec has no one to lie to anymore. Not like all the other people he'd met with suicidal tendancies, with all of their elaborate tales.

Alec isn't a liar anyway. He is a very straight forward person. He isn't asking if he should lie, he's asking Magnus if he really wants to hear the truth. The Warlock isn't sure. After slight thought though, he nods. He has to know at this point. Alec nods. "I was planning to jump off.. Brooklyn Bridge actually.." The Shadowhunter lets out a hollow laugh at the horrible irony of it all.

Magnus' heart stops at Alec's words, not finding it quite as funny. He'd expected them of course but.. Oh God, what if he hadn't been at that club tonight? What would he have done finding out Alexander was dead? Or would he have found out, he didn't hear of the others.. Then again, some Downworlder would have probably heard and felt the need to tell him of his exboyfriend's tragic suicide.

"Magnus?" Magnus is broken out of his slight panic as he feels Alec's hand on his cheek and he zones back into the conversation. He takes in the boy's slightly nervous blue eyes. Nervous he'd be mad possibly? He isn't mad. He's just aggrevated he could not have stopped it, not really. He could never have known this was gonna happen.

Then Magnus throws his arms around Alec. Alec lets out a startled yelp, not expecting this reaction. He hugs him back quickly though, burying his neck in the Warlock's neck. "I'm sorry.. I'm not trying to upset you.. you asked.. I didn't even mean for you to see my arms.. I'm so sorry.." Magnus just holds him tighter.

Stupid boy. He'd never be more glad then he is now he saw what is on the boy's arms, glad the boy wasn't able to hide his pain as he usually does. Maybe he can help now. He isn't letting this continue no matter what, but he's pretty sure Alexander will help Magnus help him. Alec has a deep rooted, obviously unhealthy, need to be needed. And until now, he's been pretty alone. Even as far as his Shadowhunter duty to protect Mundanes, Magnus knows Alec takes his job very seriously. He also knows Alec doesn't always feel appreciated on the job. But Magnus, he needed Alec. Immortals often run out of reasons to breath, but as long as Alec is breathing he will also be.

"Alec, please stop apologizing. I just.. I don't want to imagine that.. please," Magnus kisses the side of his head. "Just promise me you'll come to me from now on, I don't want to,I can't,lose you." He rubs the shaking boy's back soothingly.

"I.." Alexander hesitates and he tenses. "Yes, okay." Magnus sighs in relief. "I'll talk to you next time." Alec says next time, cause he knows there will be a next time. Once it starts, there always seems to be a next time he's heard. Magnus is, however, just happy that Alec agreed at the moment. He isn't planning on losing his Nephlim any time soon.

"Thank you," he whispers. "I love you so much Alexander Lightwood." Alec kisses Magnus' cheek. "I love you too Magnus Bane."

A/N: Number one feedback needed* How cringe worthy and clique was that?