Just today I decided to ask my friend about my preference. I ask, "What do you think I am?"

She straight away answered; "You are hetero!" but she was silent for a moment. And then she whispered. "or… maybe bi."

I was laughing, but she added a statement that made me stop.

"If you are a homo, then stay away from me."

Enjoy! (Please make in mind they are teenagers who very emotional; although they looked like mature university student in the real POT, LOL.)

__________

That jerk! Tezuka Kunimitsu, my ass!

Fuji Syuusuke stomped his way to home. He was in a really bad moo since he was ust receive a big shock—another conformation.

What an ass? Saying I am not attractive enough? Don't he know I am the tensai?!

Fuji knows that it wasn't true. He looked good, he could be a very engaging company, he could do almost everything perfectly, and he is the epitome of perfect. Tezuka should have been more satisfied with him rather than the egg-head Oishi.

But yet, it was another form of conformation. That no matter how perfect he is, nobody gonna accept him. Nobody gonna stay. Nobody gonna ever truly see what he is underneath all those perfect-ness.

Is it my life?

Fuji knows he was actually quite different. His first crush was his own brother. It is sickening and he himself felt awful too. But holding Yuuta's hand cheered him up, spending time with Yuuta never bored him out, and making Yuuta looked at him in awe always made him happy beyond believe. He initially thought it was just a brother complex, and he was a small child, he didn't think too much. But then, when anybody except him showed Yuuta any affection, Fuji became restless. It will worsen if Fuji found out that Yuuta actually like the affection. Fuji felt the green feeling, the jealous, the envy. He doesn't like how they showered his Yuuta with affection and love, even the one which come from their parents. He didn't like how Yuuta reacted to it. He didn't like himself for being jealous over his parent affection on Yuuta, yet at the same time jealous as the love their parent shown for Yuuta will make Yuuta more attached to them than Fuji himself.

He wanted all those affection and Yuuta for himself.

He graduated from those chronic complex feelings, though. Since he started tennis, he could feel better in many ways, mostly since he could spend more time outside of the home, reducing his time meeting Yuuta. He could show that he is one of the best in tennis, and also he could get all the attention he need by socializing with the whole gang, namely Eiji and others. Especially he enjoyed the shower of affection from Kawamura Takashi, whom confessed to him.

He was scared at first. Fuji knows he has no problem personally by going out with Takashi since he himself like guys, but he is troubled by the prospect of his parent found out. They had already despite him since his childhood, what will they say if they know that their son is actually a gay? Fuji may end up on street. Fuji didn't want to make his parent have a strong reason to kick him out.

In the end, everybody will reject me.

_______

Tezuka stared at the ceilings. The yellow ball in his hand was squashed into its limit. The face of Fuji Syuusuke, his current boyfriend, flashed in his mind.

You are a jerk, Tezuka Kunimitsu!

Tezuka sighed. It was no need for Fuji to call him like that. He knows he is always the jerk. He couldn't socialize; people thought he is arrogant and cold. He was brought up in a silent environment, everything is traditional and formal. He wasn't used to the informal way of friendship. In the end he preferred to stay in the background. He was always alone, until Oishi made friend with him. He was very thankful to Oishi about that. He thought it was a love. But then, he realized something.

After Fuuji said 'let's go out' 3 days ago, Tezuka started to think. Fuji said those words so easily and made Tezuka wonder, what is love? Why is it so easy for a person to choose whom he is going out with? Wasn't the purpose of going out is to know each other better and prepared for a wedding? Wasn't it supposed to be very formal, well prepared and one must think carefully before entering the stage? So why… is Fuji can asked him out that easy? It made Tezuka felt a bit disappointed. His expectation of love and dating is different from the world.

He never really noticed Fuji, honestly. All he knows about the smiling tensai is that Fuji Syuusuke is a perfect, fake façade. He once read that perfect people are actually those who are unsecured, never have been loved. People are imperfect because they know that no matter what they do wrong, there will be someone who still love and receive them. Perfect people are people whom driven by insecurities due to lack of love and fall into false perception that perfection will make them loved by others.

He never noticed Fuji because Fuji is very unreal.

And he just started to notice Fuji's real face when Fuji shut the door in front of him, calling him a jerk to his face.

That angry face… stayed in his head, making Tezuka frowned.

He just couldn't forget that angry Fuji. It felt somehow better than the smiling one.

______________

Fuji came home to the usual empty house.

Not bothering of noticing anybody he was back, Fuji spread himself on the wooden floor.

Tezuka… jerk!

But that jerk's face stayed inside his mind. Even when he was going out with Takashi, he never have Takashi's face hanging around the ceilings like this.

Stupid. Stupid. Stupid Tezuka!

________________

Fuji didn't know how to face the bespectacled captain the next day, but he somehow wanted to see the stoic boy again. Just see. Just to see the line of his jaw, the glasses and the black eyes.

He eventually found Tezuka standing underneath the biggest tree by the school's garden. But he wasn't alone, there was a girl there.

Fuji needs not be a tensai to work out what was happening. Tezuka was being confessed by a girl. Tezuka was blushing a bit, and the girl asked him to reply her in a week.

when the girl was out of the vision, Fuji came out and touched Tezuka's shoulder. Shocked, the stoic boy screamed a bit. Fuji Syusuke laughed.

"What, are you that surprised?"

"Fuji! Don't scare me like that!"

"Well... I just didnt want to ruin the confession, Tezuka. let me see... oh, you got a letter! Let me open it!"

"Fuji! Stop!"

"Come on, it's just a peek... it won't hurt!"

"Fuji, this is rude to her. I dont like this, so please stop."

Fuji felt his anger burst out again. He didn't know why, but everytime he was with Tezuka, he will ended up being angry, and possesive. Like Yuuta.

"So, you think you are not being rude to me? I am the one whom you are going out with! Why don't you tell her you have me already?"

Tezuka was silent. Fuji took it as a deviant. So that's means Tezuka didn't actually think they are going out.

"Fine." Fuji spoked coldly. "Just break up with me and go along with that girl. Let's see whether you are a gay or a straight. This will be very interesting."

TBC

Fuji has become so OoC. I am sorry.

Written with stomach so hurt it felt like dying. Why does woman bleed monthly?