A Comedy of Fate

Synopsis: Sarah calls the Goblin King and decides to take him to her patronizing therapist, to prove that he's real. Unfortunately, they get stuck in an elevator and a comedy of fate ensues.

Chapter 1: Hallucinations and Innuendos

The figment raised a laconic brow at my sputtering. A hint of a smile tugged at his lips. Great, my sexual dream seems to find me amusing.

"You do exist," I managed, still gaping at him.

"You noticed," he replied sardonically. His voice grew deep as he lowered his eyes to mine, "do you need me for something?"

Wait a second; was the sexual innuendo starting already?

I groaned. All those years, hassling with the insurance company to pay my therapy bills and I was back to square one: hallucinating about a man who looked like the embodiment of sex. Oh well, at least his pants did not outline his anatomy like before, that has to be an improvement right?

"Look," I said, massaging my temples, "how do I know you are not a hallucination?"

"I beg your pardon." He looked highly affronted.

"I'm sorry I've hurt your ego, but my sanity is at stake here," I replied, trying to reason with him. "Do something to prove that you are real."

He looked thoughtful for a second, and then his eyes gleamed mischievously, "I see what you are proposing. Would you like to remain here or shall we enter your bed chamber?"

"What?" I croaked. "That's not. That's not even. That's not exactly what I had in mind."

"Pity," he drawled.

I suddenly had a brilliant idea. "Please sit down," I indicated. "I'm going to book an emergency session with Dr. Ruth and take you to see her," I told him, as I grabbed my phone and speed dialled Dr. Ruth.

"Hello Sarah, what's wrong?"

Great, she'd started screening my calls. "The Goblin King is in my living room," I blurted, cringing as I awaited her reaction.

"It seems as if you are having another hallucination Sarah, are you sure you have not taken any hallucinogens? You know, cannabis, certain mushrooms, morning glory, those things."

Just what was she insinuating here?! Calm down Williams, she's asking you what any rational adult would ask you. "No, Dr. Ruth. I called him--and he, well, showed up."

"Well, if you've not taken any hallucinogens…" she sounded doubtful here, "perhaps you are having delusions for other reasons. I don't think you should leave your apartment until the delusion stops."

"But I need you to see that he's real!" I cried. Ok, I'll admit, I sounded a bit juvenile there. "He said he would." I stopped speaking as I realized that my -oh so lovely- figment sat down next to me and rested a leather clad hand on my thigh. Why, oh why did I wear short shorts today?

"When I said sit down, I did not mean so close to me."

"Excuse me?"

"I'm sorry; I was talking to someone else."

"I find your attire…interesting," Jareth murmured, his fingers drawing patterns on my thigh.

"What do you think you're doing?" I hissed, trying desperately to squash a sigh of pleasure from escaping my lips. I grabbed his hand and held it at an arms length.

"Sarah, who's there with you?" Dr. Ruth asked as she heard a male voice in the background. Dear god, had the girl invited a random stranger into her house, believing he was her 'Goblin King'? As patronizing as Dr. Ruth was, she cared for the wellbeing of her patients.

"I told you, he's here!" You know, for a therapist, she doesn't have the best listening skills. "So should I-" I felt a low moan emerging in my throat as Jareth's other hand slipped underneath the fabric of my shorts. My eyes widened in mortification as I realized that Dr. Ruth probably heard all this.

"Sarah, I want you to come meet me immediately." She'd decided she would give that man a piece of her mind! Just who did he think he was to take advantage of the mentally challenged?!

Finally! If she'd just said yes earlier, we would not have had to go through that embarrassing debacle. "Ok, we'll be there," I said, hanging up and immediately rising up from the sofa, leaving behind a rather disappointed Goblin King.

"Jareth the Goblin King," I generally use people's full names when I'm scolding them, I figured that was his, "never do that again!"

He rolled his eyes heavenward, as if mentally saying a sarcastic 'pshaw.' "You were enjoying yourself."

"I was. You can't. Please don't." An arrogant smirk graced his face as I stuttered about, trying to speak a coherent sentence. "That's beside the point," I said, glaring.

"Just what is this device," he said curiously, as he took my cell phone and examined it. He put it to his ears, trying to emulate what I had done. I sighed, why did he have to look so damn cute?

Make nice with him Williams, you still need him to agree to accompany you to Dr. Ruth's. "Jareth," I started, in the nicest voice I could muster. He looked at me, his eyes suddenly weary. "My doctor said she'd see us both, would you accompany me to her office?"

His royal highness calculated my request for a while before looking at me. I took a sudden step back as he smiled predatorily, his pointy teeth gleaming. Something told me this was not a good idea.

"Offer me something in return," he replied, his voice tinged with desire.

"Couldn't you do this just out of the kindness of your heart?"

"No."

Oh well, it was worth a try. "What do you want then?"

"What are you willing to give me?"

I almost growled with frustration. "It seems to me that we're not communicating properly. I'm willing to give you any physical, nonliving object from my apartment."

He began to argue, but his eyes shifted to my cell phone. "I want you to give me this," he said triumphantly.

I raised my eyebrows, looks like today's my lucky day. "Agreed."

He eyed me suspiciously, as if he'd miscalculated the value of the phone. "What's said is said," I teased, mocking his deep voice. Something dark flashed in his eyes and I realized, a little too late, that throwing his words back at him was not the brightest thing to do.