I never knew my life would turn out like this: so crazy, so mixed up, so dangerous, so different, yet exactly how I wanted it to be. As a man, I can't believe I'm saying this, but who knew one moment could change my life forever and make it so much better. More importantly, who knew one woman could change my life so much. If I was to say that to any man walking by, they certainly would have given me strange looks, despite my General status, but honestly after meeting that one special woman, I wouldn't have cared if even the Emperor gave me a strange look. But I know my mother and my father would certainly be proud, and I would be proud of myself: isn't that what matters?

But honestly, after meeting her, I have to admit, I'm more of a man. It doesn't sound manly to say that a woman makes you manlier, but I really am. People say it's because she can beat me now in fighting. I don't think so. I'm still better. But from her I've learned that I don't need to care about what others think, and all I need to seek is my own approval. Reach my own goals. Live up to my own standards. Not someone else's.

Being a man isn't only about being tough and fighting for your own country. It isn't about just about who owns the household, who does the most jobs and the hardest tasks, or just who has more power. A few years ago, when I was trying to sway girls, I would have said that and showed off my body. I finally got a look of disgust from my mother and my father. That stopped it right there. But I can honestly say, before her, I was skeptical about the whole idea. Even after I met her, I was still skeptical. But when I stood there, under her cherry blossom tree, and she stared at me right in the eyes, completely unafraid, I realized a couple of things. One, I was a nervous wreck. I was completely vulnerable to her. Two, if power is what makes a man, then she was the man there. Standing next to her made me powerless to her. She was the one in control. She could have completely dismissed me and never invite me to dinner. I would have been heartbroken, and she had that power, but she didn't use it. To me that's what makes a man: even though you have great power, you also have a great responsibility.

Now to say she was the man in our relationship, that's taking it to a new low. I was still the man. When my mother and father gave me a look of disgust with how I talked to ladies, I took into consideration a couple of things. One, the fact that my parents married for love was not only rare, but it showed me that it was possible. And with her, I learned about love. Not the shallow attraction most old men feel. But the actual love that you feel when you're happy. The type of love that makes your heart beat uncontrollably. The type that makes your stomach feel like you've been punched in the gut. The type that is a true feeling, more than an attraction. And that's what I felt with her. I didn't think it was possible, but it is.

If my brother was reading this, he'd say I lost my man card when I mentioned the word woman, and especially in the way I talked about them other than lustfully. Well that's the thing, no one will be reading this, and hopefully not. If they did they'd finally understand me. But there's only one person that would or at least, I hope will read it. Because she would understand.