Hey guys! Sorry for the slightly slow update - I am hoping to have a chapter out weekly though! Also, I changed the title to "Wildest Dreams" because I feel that it suits my story a little better, and I didn't think "Of Fears and Ghosts" flowed all that well.
Quickly wanted to thank those that reviewed and favourited! I'm glad you're enjoying it so far. Don't forget to drop me a review to let me know what you think! :)
Inhale through your nose, slowly.
I was meticulously brushing my hair, staring at myself in the mirror. I had donned some light make-up around my eyes, to make their green hue really pop out. I thought that my eyes were my most attractive feature, and if I wanted to have a good first day, I should probably at least attempt to not look like a potato.
I had decided on a pair of dark skinny jeans and a wine-red, three-quarter-sleeve shirt. The shirt was one of my favourites; it made my boobs look much more impressive than they were, and also had lace in the back – which I thought was pretty cute. My hair was not a gigantic mass of tangles for once (hence the repetitive brushing, which had been going on for some time), but it was still not perfect. It would never be perfect, but I continued to stubbornly brush it.
Exhale through your mouth, slowly.
My anxiety was through the roof this morning, so much so that I thought my heart might beat right out of my chest. The breathing exercises were helping, but not as much as the psychologist back home had promised they would. However, it was better than popping some form of medication or another.
I forced myself to set the hair brush down, and twirled once more in the floor-length mirror I had received for a birthday some odd years ago. It wasn't fantastic, but it wasn't horrible either. It's probably best to not look great, that way nobody is disappointed when I start getting too lazy to do this shit.
"Hey shorty, let's go already!" Virginia bellowed to me from the kitchen, or some area near there. "I have to go to work after I drop you off, don't forget!"
I closed my eyes for a moment, mentally rallying myself for the day ahead. I nodded, grabbed my backpack from my freshly-made bed, my cellphone from the nightstand, and I was off – like a herd of turtles.
I shuffled into the living room to find Virginia pacing the floor, already dressed for work and wearing her shoes. I sighed and walked a little quicker to the back porch, where I had left my shoes the day before. I shoved my feet into the DC's and called to my sister that I would meet her at the car, since I didn't want to trudge my dirty shoes through the house.
I took deep breaths once I was outside, trying to cram as much of the clean, peaceful air into my lungs as possible before I had to brave the disaster that was high school. Thankfully it was only the beginning of semester, and I had missed less than a week, so it would be less uncomfortable to start off in class.
I climbed into the passenger seat of Virginia's beat-up silver Chevrolet cavalier, which she had owned for at least five years now. It was the car I had learned to drive in, the car where I had smoked my first cigarette (ew, by the way – how do people do that all the time?). It was a little piece of home in an unfamiliar territory.
"How excited are you?" Virginia asked as she threw the car into reverse and sped down the driveway. If she had been paying attention to me, she would have seen the death-glare I had shot her way. She knew just as well as I did that I was anything but excited. Why did I do this to myself?
"I just want to get this over with." I grumbled, crossing my arms over my chest. The sky was overcast and dreary, coinciding with my mood. "I haven't seen the sun since we moved here, did you know that?"
Virginia sighed and looked at me as we cruised down the road. "You're going to do great, stop your bitching."
"I hate you."
"If you hate me so much, why would you move down here to live with me?"
"Someone needs to take care of you."
Virginia laughed at that answer, "dude, you're five years younger than me. I think I can handle myself."
"Yeah, yeah…" I grumbled, turning my head to instead stare out the window. Virginia turned the music up on the radio, she had it set some kind of local pop station. I tapped my foot in time to the beat of the music as I mused about what the day would bring. I had never been great at making friends – I am horrible at trying to include myself when others are having a conversation. It was times like these that I envied my sister the most. She had Grammie Agatha's personality, which meant that she could talk to whoever she wanted without the slightest bit of discomfort.
The drive to the high school was shorter than I anticipated. I was hoping for more time, more time to muster my courage, more time to take in the beauty of the drive, I just simply wanted more time. Yet here I am, unbuckling my seat belt as Virginia brought the car to a halt in front of the main doors. I turned to look at her, grabbing my bag from the floor in front of my seat as I did so.
"You're going to do great, Lucy. Be yourself - I know it is cliché. I believe it with my whole heart though, that you're going to do great here. I just have a really good feeling about Forks."
"Well, I'm glad one of us does." I replied, grabbing hold of the handle and opening up the door. "I guess we'll find out, huh?"
"I guess so," she replied with a wicked grin. I stepped out of the car, raised an eyebrow at my sister, and then turned to face my doom.
The school was not as big as the one I had attended back home, but it sure as hell was more intimidating. The brick building looked as though it had been around for centuries, not to mention all of the people that were wandering around. I took a deep breath, clutched my backpack tightly, and headed inside.
I had entered into what appeared to be a lobby of some sort. There were people milling about everywhere, hollering at each other and horsing around. I drew my arms in close to my sides and shimmied my way through the crowds. I could see a large, glassed-in room with a fancy looking desk, and assumed that was where the office was.
I shoved the glass door open and practically fell into the office. A woman with large, wire-rimmed glasses looked up from her computer with a frown. "Can I help you?" She enquired, looking over the top of her glasses at me. She had her grey hair pulled up into a tight bun, and looked the part of a librarian from the movies, the kind who hated noise and teenagers.
"Yes, actually," I flashed the brightest smile I could muster, trying to thaw the cold look she was giving me. It did not work. I cleared my throat and continued, "I just moved here – I was looking for my class schedule and a locker?"
The lady deigned to not respond, and instead turned to her computer. I warily approached the desk as the lady typed away frantically. She did not even ask my name, but the printer spit out what looked like a schedule behind her.
"Lucy Evans, I will assume?" She asked as she spun her chair around and grabbed the schedule from the printer. "You're the only new student we have had this year." She proceeded to hand the schedule to me. I thanked her, and she turned back to her computer. "As for your locker…" She tapped a few buttons on her keyboard and then turned to her right, digging through a drawer that I could not see into. She pulled out a combination lock and handed that to me as well.
"The locker is in the band hallway, number seventy-four. The combination is written on the piece of tape on the back of your lock. Do not forget to take the tape off once you have memorized the numbers, if someone breaks into the locker and steals your possessions the school is not liable." She stated matter-of-factly and began leafing through a pile of papers to her left, then pulled out a map of the school. She indicated band hall to me, then handed the map over. "The classroom numbers are located underneath your teacher's name on the schedule, you shouldn't have a hard time finding your way around." Without further ado, the lady turned her head back to her computer.
"Uh, thank you." I replied, realizing that I had been dismissed. I looked down at the schedule and deduced that I had biology first. I checked the map, glanced once more at the lady behind the desk (who was doing a very good job of pretending I did not exist) and headed off to my first class.
The halls were clearing rapidly, I checked the time on my watch and my eyes widened. How long had I been in that office for? I was going to be late for my first class on my first day – that's exactly what I wanted. I consulted my map and jogged off to the left side of the school, hoping that I was reading the map correctly – I hadn't exactly passed orienteering in gym previously.
I finally came to what I thought must be the biology lab, and knocked on the now-closed door, hoping against hope that I wasn't about to embarrass myself by being at the wrong classroom. I shifted my weight from one foot to the other as I heard the teacher telling the class to settle down. I could see through the glass pane that he was looking rather skeptical as he approached the door. The worst part was, he was attractive as far as teachers go – he had the air of sophistication, brown hair (long by teacher's standards) that flopped across his forehead gracefully, and black-rimmed glasses that somehow accentuated his features.
"Can I help you?" He asked politely as he stuck his head out the door. What is with everyone around here thinking I need hel- oh, it's because I do need help.
"Um, yes. I'm looking for Mr. Henderson? I'm new and I'm supposed to be in his biology class." I could feel my face getting hot, and I knew I was blushing. And I thought starting a week into the semester wouldn't be that bad… Ha!
The man smiled at me, "it looks like you've come to the right place then miss…?"
"Evans," I replied in relief. "Lucy Evans is my name."
"Ah yes, I do recall your name suddenly appearing on my class roster!" Mr. Henderson opened the door wider and stepped aside so that I might enter. "Class," he called out. Everyone stopped what they were doing to stare at me. "This is Lucy Evans, she's new to Forks. Let's give her a nice, warm welcome shall we?"
Silence. There was dead silence. This is fantastic, absolutely perfect. I could feel my anxiety rising inside me like some sort of great beast. It had stayed tame until this very second, because it was this very second that I was beginning to lose my cool. Can I be struck by lightning now, or?
Mr. Henderson frowned at the class and indicated that I could sit in the only available seat in the room, which was right beside a window. You're a saint, Mr. Henderson. I slipped past the silent lab tables and took up my new seat next to a girl with long, blonde hair. She looked at me as I sat down and shot me a shy smile. I smiled back slightly, quickly pulling out the textbook that I had ordered via eBay before I had even moved, and settled in to a long, two-hour class.
The rest of the day went by much smoother. I found my locker and was able to shove all of my heavy textbooks into it before getting lost again. I did end up having lunch by myself, but that wasn't entirely out of the norm for me anyway. It gave me time to explore the school and concentrate on my breathing exercises before having to go about attending brand-new classes again.
The afternoon passed quickly, without much incident. As I sat on the front steps of the school, waiting for Virginia, I observed the rest of the students racing around me. As I watched, I noticed one group of students seemed to be given a wide berth by the rest of the student body. There were four of them, two boys and two girls. Three of which were breathtakingly gorgeous – the female reminded me of a sprite, she was so small and light at this distance. The two males were dark, brooding almost. One of them was gazing at the pixie-girl with absolute rapture, while the other male had his arm around the waist of the second girl. I couldn't see anything special about her from this distance – she looked to be awkward, and did not have the attractive features of the pixie-girl. Not to say that she was unattractive – just paired with those three, she stuck out like a sore thumb.
As I stared at this odd group, I heard someone plunk down on the stairs beside. I turned my head slowly, wondering who the hell was sitting there. I was relieved to find out that it was the shy girl from my biology class. She stuck her hand out to me, which I shook without even thinking about.
"You're Lucy, right?" Her voice was quiet, almost mouse-like. "I'm Penelope Waters, we have biology together… and English, too." I smiled, but I was also kind of confused – I hadn't noticed her in English class… then again, I had ducked my face when entering every class since biology and taken the seat nearest to the back of the room as possible.
"It's nice to meet you, Penelope." I looked back at the quartet I had been studying, but they were nowhere to be found. I turned back to the blonde girl beside me. "I just moved here from Canada."
Penelope nodded, "I heard." I raised an eyebrow, wait- what? "Sorry I didn't talk to you in biology – I was a little distracted by Mr. Henderson." She turned tomato-red at this comment, and I had to stifle a giggle. Someone's got a little crush on Henderson.
"That's fine," I grinned. "I can understand the distraction… he's not ugly, that's for sure." Penelope giggled and turned an even darker shade of red, if that was possible. "So, where did you hear I'm from Canada?"
"Oh, everyone's talking about you. We haven't had a new student since Isabella Swan came to town and stirred everything up… I guess everyone's wondering if you're going to do the same." Penelope smiled at me. I was starting to take back my assumption of her being shy, and instead thinking that she may just be introverted.
"Well," I started, not entirely sure of what to say to that, "I don't intend to make any waves. I like to stay below the radar." Penelope nodded and agreed with me.
As our conversation continued and the cars in the parking lot dwindled farther, I couldn't help but wonder how Penelope intended on getting home. I was just about to ask when Virginia pulled up, honking the horn. I stood up warily, looking down at Penelope.
"Don't worry about me," she waved a hand at Virginia. "My drive will be here shortly, I'll see you tomorrow."
"Sure," I replied with a smile. "I hope you don't have to wait around too much longer… We could probably drive you home if you'd like?"
"No, no. My dad will be here soon. He's always late." I shrugged my shoulders and waved goodbye, then turned and walked down the steps as fast as I could without appearing rude.
I jumped into the car and threw my school bag over my shoulder, heaving a sigh. I looked at Virginia's cocked eyebrow and shook my head. "Let's just go home."
Inhale through your nose, slowly.
The smells of the forest would honestly calm me down even without me laying here on the moss-covered ground. This little clearing in the woods was going to be my "place." I would not bring anyone here, I would not tell anyone of its existence… I would simply come to here to remember that the world is a lot bigger than what I have seen, and that somewhere someone has it worse than I do. Much, much worse.
I opened my eyes and stared up at the canopy of trees, blocking out the grey clouds from my view. I would kill to get a little bit of sunlight, though… I uttered a sigh and adjusted my position a little. I could live here, in the middle of the forest, without any other human contact. I would probably be that much happier if I did, too.
Snap!
I bolted upright and looked around me, my hair whipping back and forth. I swear I just heard something moving in the bushes… I took a deep breath, slowed my movement and took a better look around. I couldn't see anything. I guess I am not the only creature who knows about this place. I stood up and brushed the dirt off my good clothes. It was probably just a rabbit… a big rabbit that can break branches… yes.
I was becoming more nervous by the second, I could sense something was in the woods – like it was right at the edge of my vision but I couldn't quite see it. I turned in a circle, twisting this way and that to try to find the source of my discomfort – but nothing.
Snap!
Time to go, I started moving cautiously toward the path that would lead me back to the new house. I couldn't be certain where I had heard the snapping of twigs coming from, but I had a hunch that it had come from my right. I kept my gaze turned toward the denser, darker, right side of the clearing as I made my way toward the deer-trail.
I was moving as silently as I could, but quickly as I dared. I did not want to be around when this animal – whatever it was – came pelting out of the woods looking for a snack. I would not make a good snack – too bony, I think, and I've definitely got too much hair on my head to be that appetizing, right?
All of a sudden, the bushes to my left – guess I was completely off, great survival skills – seemed to explode outward as a gigantic – and by gigantic I mean horse-sized – reddish-colored wolf burst through the foliage just feet from me. He – once again, I am guessing, and I could be totally wrong as proven just a moment earlier – gazed at me with dark, intelligent eyes, his massive tail swishing back and forth. The wolf cocked his head at me, but did not get any closer.
The breath whooshed out of me, and I halted mid-step. I suppose I was praying that wolves are like dinosaurs and can't see you if you aren't moving, though we all know that it was wishful thinking. It was then that I realized that I had no weapon, no cell phone, and was too far away to scream loud enough for someone to hear.
"Nice doggie," I whispered as I started to try to inch past, "just gotta get home… Be a nice doggie…" The wolf snorted at me, his eyes following my every move. "I mean… big, bad wolf… Yes, that's you… You just leave me alone…" I was tip-toeing past when he suddenly lunged forward. I let out an involuntary squeak of protest as the wolf was now only inches from me. I could smell his raw breath, and see the individual hairs that made up his beautiful coat of fur.
"Please don't kill me," I breathed, my body tensed for flight if the wolf came any closer. He sniffed at me, his muzzle coming closer but not inching his girth nearer. He took a deep breath and then sat back on his hunches, staring at me.
My eyes widened, but I wasn't going to waste the opportunity. I backed up a few inches and began side-stepping toward the path, keeping my body turned toward the wolf so I could keep track of where it was. Then, over his shoulder, appeared another wolf – this one completely black, except for his golden eyes. Oh god, why me. I can't die like this. I'm too young!
"Please don't chase me," I whispered at the rouge-coloured beast that had blocked my progress. The beast's eyes narrowed, as if he understood me. "Please," I then let my instincts take over and I turned and ran flat out as fast as my legs would take me, and I didn't stop or turn around until my feet landed on the back deck.