A/N: Based on popular demand, I've decided to make this a 2 part story. I'm pretty sure I won't write another chapter after this. It's just for kicks! I'm going to warn you now, these characters are extremely OOC because this is purely for funny-ness…and of course for Literati pleasure...Seriously people, this is VERY OOC!

Aw, dedicated to Hatty! I'm so sorry about today Hun! I hope this will brighten your mood!

Disclaimer: Don't own…

On with the story…

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Those Gilmore Girls, They Saved a Hoodlum

"What about last night?" Luke asked.

"Well, you see…"

"Oh God! What did Jess do? Where is he? Did you kill him yet?" Luke interrupted.

"Well no, as I was trying to say before…"

"Oh, so you left some for me? Ah gee thanks Lorelai, I didn't think you had the restraint in you," Luke said.

"No, Luke…"

"Oh here he is, bye Lorelai," Luke said quickly and hung up.

"No! Luke!" Lorelai tried, but he had already hung up.

"So?" Rory asked hopefully.

"We need to high-tail it to the diner," Lorelai said and started running to the door.

"Oh my God, try Luke on your cell on the way," Rory suggested and as they hopped down the front stairs, in their pajamas, trying to get their shoes on, while Lorelai also fumbled with her cell phone.

"Luke's," he said into the phone and in the background you could here Jess yelling for help and muttering curses at Lorelai.

"Luke! Don't hurt him! It's okay! Everything's fine, I'll explain when we get there, just don't hurt him!" Lorelai exclaimed and hung up.

"What? Lorelai?" Luke said into the phone confusedly, then turned to Jess, "You're lucky, Lorelai just saved your ass, I don't know why, but she did, so…get to work!"

Jess scowled and picked up the coffee pot. As he was getting a table by the door, two panting Gilmore girls walked in the door. No one noticed Dean at the counter sipping coffee.

"Did you kill him!?" Lorelai asked as soon as she had caught her breath.

"Um, no?" Luke said confused.

"Yes! We did it! We saved a hoodlum!" Lorelai raised her hands above her head triumphantly.

"Hey," Jess said to Rory and the two smiled.

"Work!" Luke ordered.

"Hey," Rory said back softly and Jess didn't move.

"Work Jess!" Luke said again as he walked past the pair. Lorelai had already contented herself at the counter with coffee.

"One second Luke," Rory said and pulled on Jess' arm until they were behind the counter.

She leant back against the counter and pulled Jess by his belt loops to her. He set the coffee pot in his hand down and cupped her face as they met in a passionate kiss. He slid his hands down her sides to her back and started to rub circles there. Rory parted her lips in a gasp and Jess took the opportunity to slide his tongue in. Rory moved her hands up his chest to behind his neck and the two seemed to forget they were in a diner.

"Oh God," Dean muttered, which snapped them back to reality.

"You have a problem Bagboy?" Jess asked.

"Yes, I need more coffee," Dean said shortly.

Rory turned to look at Dean and giggled the turned to Miss. Patty and Babette's table, "Did you see that? Patty? Babette?" she called to them.

"See what sweetie?" Patty asked innocently with her usual sultry smile.

"You're kidding right?" Rory asked.

"Of course doll! How could we not?" Babette piped in.

Rory smiled, "Good."

She kissed Jess again.

"Enough with the PDA!" Lorelai said, "I'm going to be blinded for life!"

"Work Jess!" Luke barked.

They pulled apart and Rory pouted, "They're no fun."

"That's because they're in love and won't admit it," Jess said, then kissed her and went off to take a new table's order. A family of 3 had moved in on Patty and Babette's table seeing as they went to spread the news.

But the show wasn't over yet.

"How could you?"

"What?" Rory turned her head to Dean; she had been staring blankly out the door. She was still behind the counter.

"And with him no less," Dean continued.

"What are you babbling about?" Rory asked.

"How could you do that right in front of me?"

"Do what? Kiss Jess? Well it's not my fault you're stupid enough to come to his place of work where I go everyday," Rory said to him and started to walk to the end of the counter. She passed Jess on her way out from behind it.

"He bothering you?" Jess asked.

"Nah, I'm fine," she answered and gave him a peck then continued to her destination which was the seat next to her mother.

"Rory, come on, I love you," Dean pleaded as Rory walked past him and Dean grabbed her arm.

"Get off of me! Didn't you hear me last night on the phone?" Rory asked as she snatched her arm back.

"Yeah and I also heard a chuckle, who was chuckling Rory?" Dean asked with anger.

"That would be me," Jess answered as he walked past Dean to behind the counter.

Dean sprung out of his seat, "What!?"

"Dean, chill out," Lorelai piped in.

By this time Babette and Patty had been informed that the diner show was far from over and they had rushed back in.

"How could that have been him if you were alone? And it had to be right next to the mouth piece," Dean stated, confused as usual.

Jess smirked, "Good for you Bagboy, so smart," he commented and waited for everything to register in Dean's mind, but it didn't.

"I wasn't alone Dean!" Rory said suddenly, breaking the silence that had fallen upon the diner that was waiting for Dean to realize the obvious.

"But…then who was there with you?"

"You're kidding right?" Gypsy chimed in from the corner.

"No," Dean said with knitted eyebrows.

Jess was chuckling quite freely as was Lorelai…well she was trying to hold her laughter back, but it just wasn't working.

"Jess, Dean, Jess was there with me. And Paris for a little," Rory finally told him.

"What!?" Dean said, angry again, "But then how did the laughter make it so close to the phone?"

Rory rolled her eyes at his stupidity and Jess and Lorelai simply could not stop laughing, it was proving difficult to stand for Jess.

"You really want to know that Dean?" Rory asked with a gleam in her eye and a smirk on her face.

"Oh come on Rory, that's just mean," Lorelai managed through her laughter. Rory had explained everything about the phone call on their run to the diner. Note to Gilmores: Gilmores DON'T run.

"Well if he wants to know…," Rory trailed off, "So, what's it going to be? Do you want to know or not?"

Everyone in the diner went silent including the laughing hyenas, awaiting Dean's answer. Dean knit his eyebrows together in deep thought. Suddenly he put his hand to his head and muttered an inaudible 'Ow' then turned to Rory as she tried not to laugh, "Yes."

"Okay," Rory said and walked over to Dean. She took a seat next to him and leaned in with a smile. She cupped her hand around her mouth as he leant his ear in and she stage whispered to him, "I was sitting on his lap," then she giggled as the diner gasped collectively.

"WHAT!?" Dean roared and sprung out of his seat, making his way behind the counter.

"Whoa Bagboy, don't come any closer," Jess said, suddenly serious.

"Leave him alone Dean," Rory said.

"No," Dean said and continued walking, "You afraid Jess?"

Jess stood his ground behind the counter as Dean neared him, "In your dreams Dean-o, but I'm not going to fight you."

"Oh yeah?"

"Yeah."

"And why's that diner boy?"

"Lay off Dean," Lorelai piped in.

"You're okay with this Lorelai?" Dean asked incredulously and snapped his head to Lorelai.

"Look Dean, Rory's right. You are too possessive and you're boarding stalker so if you could please leave, that would be great," Lorelai answered and went back to sipping her coffee.

Babette and Patty were soaking this up eagerly.

"Fine," Dean said and started to walk away, then suddenly turned around and went to punch Jess in the jaw but Jess blocked it and threw Dean one to the gut.

"Get out Dean!" Rory yelled.

"I love you Rory!" Dean tried, clutching his stomach in pain.

"LUKE!" Rory said.

"Dean, out, NOW!" Luke bellowed and went behind the counter to yank Dean out and then threw him out the door. When Luke closed the door the diner crowd erupted in applause. Rory and Lorelai giggled as Luke turned scarlet and told them to shut-up.

"Is the show ova' doll?" Babette called to Rory.

"One sec. Babette," Rory said as she bit her lip and trotted to where Jess stood at the end of the counter.

She reached up and pulled him down to her in a quick, passionate kiss, "Okay, show's over," Rory smiled and kissed him again.

"Okay, so you know the whole town is going to know everything that just happened in a matter of 5 minutes right?" Jess asked her as he held her in his arms; hands around her waist rubbing small circles on his back.

She had her hands around his neck and went on her tippy-toes to give him a quick peck, "Yup," Rory smiled a large grin as a light shade of pink tinted her cheeks.

"As long as you're okay with it," Jess smirked and kissed her nose.

"Enough," Lorelai started suddenly, "with the PDA!" she finished and she covered her eyes.

"Whatever you say Lorelai," Jess smirked and leant down to capture Rory's lips in a slow sensual kiss that took her breath away.

"Oh come on," Lorelai said dramatically and laid her head down in her hands on the counter, "Ror?"

They broke apart, "Yeah?" Rory answered breathlessly.

"We're still in our pajamas," Lorelai said, head still in her hands.

"Oh my God! We are!" Rory's face turned a deep shade of red as she pecked Jess then grabbed her mom by the arm and started to drag her out of the counter, "Come on mom!" to her mom, "Bye Jess! Bye Luke!" she said over her shoulder as she and Lorelai rushed out the diner and started towards their house. They would be back later.

Those Gilmore girls, thought Luke and Jess as they shook their heads and continued working as if nothing had changed.

Everything had changed.

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A/N: So, not as long as the first chapter, but you guys are lucky I even did this. I wasn't planning on it, but that's okay! Tell me what you think!

Love you Hatty! Hope you're in a better mood!