I no longer wore the suit of armour, but my dress. I had slayed the…Jabberwocky and became the Red Queens champion, or was it the White Queen… I panicked. I could already feel the memories slipping away. But I couldn't forget. I promised…I promised Tarrant I wouldn't. The Mad Hatter. His face when I drank the blood. The vial. The vial!

I searched myself for the vial. I had to still have it. It had to be real. It wasn't a dream.

I found the cold glass metal topped container attached to a chain around my neck. I sighed and smiled. It was real. Remember it. I repeated to myself over and over again.

I fell in love with wonderland. A place I could be myself. A place where everything was nonsense. Nothing there is what it is because everything is what it isn't. The norm is to be different. Nothing there is proper, who would be to say what is proper, no-one, because everything is mad. I'm mad. That's where I belong. In wonderland. With the mad hatter.

I looked down at the vial I was clutching in my fist. At a first it appeared empty, but as I looked closer, I noticed a think layer of liquid remained in the bottom. I gasped in delight. It might only be a few drops, but it was hopefully enough.

I looked back down to the party. I couldn't go without saying farewell. I had to tie up the loose ends in this life to start a new one.

I ran back to the gazebo, going through everything I was going to say. I had to control my tears when I thought of my mother. But she had Margret and she would know I was happy, or with father.

I emerged into the maze and slowed to a walk. I straightened my dress and smoothed my hair down as much as I could before stepping out and slowly approaching the gazebo under the gasps and murmurs of the watching crowd.

"Good lord, Alice. Are you alright?" Lord Ascot look bemused and a little angry, but I could see the twinkle of amusement in his eyes. Yes, my fathers company would be in good hands.

I simply smiled and turned to his son.

"Hamish, I'm sorry, I can't marry you. You're not the right man for me."

Tarrant's face flashed into my mind, smiling and I felt a boost of confidence in what I was doing when I turned to my sister.

"Margret, this is my life and I'm making the decisions from now on, but I want you to know I love you and you'll always be my sister." I hugged her. She looked taken back and her body was stiff, but she quickly returned the hug and whispered in my ear.

"No corset?"

"Never again." I whispered.

She studied me carefully.

" I don't know what you're going to do Alice, but look after yourself." She sighed. "I guess this is goodbye then."

I smiled weakly. She might like to wear a codfish a lot, but my sister was always in there, and she knew me better that almost anyone in this world.

I nodded and hugged her once more. "Goodbye." I whispered.

When I pulled back, I saw a tear escape her eye. "Goodbye."

I turned to her husband.

"You're lucky to have my sister for your wife Lowell. You better be good to her. I'll be watching."

He looked scared enough, so I moved on to Lady Ascot, summing up all the courage I had.

"I happen to love rabbits, especially white ones. This whole party was drivel and do you know what? I never really liked you anyway."

How's that for muchness. I turned my back on her sharply and strode to Lord Ascot.

"Take care of the company, won't you." He nodded his head, smiling. I was about to turn away when something came into my head.

"China." I said to him.

"Excuse me?"

"China. Why stop halfway when you can go the full mile?"

I turned at that and walked to my mother.

"What's going on Alice?" she asked, I could see she was worried.

I smiled sadly.

"I'm so sorry mother, but I have to do this." I took her hands. "I've never really fitted in here have I? But where I'm going I do. And I found someone, a man. An amazing, wonderful man. And I think I love him."

I saw my words register with my mother. She began to cry.

"You remind me so of your father." I smiled and let the tears fall freely. "So I know there's no stopping you now. You're already there. But Alice, can he support…"

She didn't finish, but I knew my mother. Even in a completely foreign place, she didn't want me to be with anyone who might drag my social status down.

I laughed. "Don't worry mother, he's employed at the royal court. He works for the queen, in fact, they're pretty good friends."

She visibly relaxed, but she tensed again.

"When are you leaving?"

"As soon as I've said goodbye."

"So soon? Can't you just wait…?"

She trailed off, knowing it was useless. Like she had said before, there was no stopping me now.

She pulled me into a hug and I felt her tears wet my cheeks. She stroked my matted hair and kissed my forehead.

"You take care of yourself won't you? And you'll visit?"

I felt my breath get stuck in my throat. I couldn't answer that. I couldn't promise her anything apart from that I'd love her forever.

"I love you so much and I'll miss you." I avoided her question.

She whimpered and pressed her gloved hand to her mouth.

I took the vial and shook it before flipping open the lid and putting it to my mouth. I looked at everyone's faces again, lingering on my mothers and sisters. Margret was crying, but she was nodding her head strongly. My mother had calmed down and I heard her whisper

"Oh, Charles."

Before I downed the remaining drops of blood and closed my eyes. It felt as though I was falling and being compressed at the same time. I squeezed myself into a ball and screwed up my eyes, wishing for the feeling to go away. I felt the air grow warm again before I smashed onto something cold, wet and hard and passed out cold.

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