What I own: several pairs of amazingly awesome stripper heels, a meager book collection, a ton of make-up from Sephora, a filthy mouth and a bunch of Twilight DVD's

What I don't: Twilight itself. That belongs to SMeyer and, despite a strong physical resemblance, I'm not her. If Twilight were mine, there would be lots more…fun to be had. I'm making nothing off of this and no copyright infringement is intended.

A/N This was beta'd by the AMAZING Beta-mom Clara Bella, who just makes me smile and fixes all of my excessive comma usage with her crazy beta skills. Major shout outs to my awesome ficwife Skychaser, my pre-readers busymommy and Hln3twimom , KD-Masen and all of the amazing ladies and gents over at the FFA and Going Under for the Third Time groups on Facebook….This story wouldn't exist without them, like, literally. Major shout outs to hobee1971 who made a GORGOUS banner for this piece…I still get tingles when I see it! I'm not below bribery and reviews will be rewarded with sneak peeks and possibly pole dances. Thanks for reading!

The scent of coffee teased my nose, its rich aroma piercing through the thin veil of sleep I was clinging to. I fought valiantly against it, wanting desperately to remain in my dreams. Dreams that were dominated by a beautiful, blond cowboy with mischievous hazel eyes, a fucking hot smirk and long, strong fingers which were calloused from years of guitar playing. I gave a happy, contented sigh at the remembrance of just what, exactly, my dream guy had been doing with said fingers, and snuggled deeper into the soft white pillows.

"Good dreams, darlin'?"

The words pulled me out of sleep faster than a bucket of water from the Antarctic fucking ocean, and I shot up in the bed, looking around the elegant room for the speaker. I found him sitting in the desk chair across from me, faded, denim clad legs and bare feet tucked under him. A criminally fucking tight, white t shirt covered his chest, and a familiar, white and green cup nestled in his hand as he looked at me with a smile.

I opened and closed my mouth a few times as the memories of the prior evening came back to me in a rush- crème brulee, silk boxers, and wet panties and amazing, mind shattering-oh fuck me, it wasn't a dream, after all. The heat rushed up my chest and into my cheeks, as I remembered some of the more pleasurable parts of my evening.

"Hi." I squeaked, my voice cracking slightly. Fucking awesome.

Jasper laughed, the throaty, musical tone filling the room. He stood and crossed to the bed in all of three fucking strides before perching on the edge and offering me the cup clasped in his hands. Thankful for the distraction, I muttered a thank you, closed my eyes and cringed, before taking a sip of the beverage. I fully expected the strong, bitter taste of coffee on my tongue. How wrong I was. I was treated, instead, to the soft, warm flavor of my favorite beverage, soft cinnamon dancing on my tongue and marrying with a slight hint of sugary vanilla sweetness and a rich hit of cream. Holy fuck. The words of a Tori Amos song drifted through my mind unbidden, and I grinned. He brought me sugar. Sigh.

"How did you?" I had barely swallowed when the question popped out.

"Cinnamon dulce cafe misto, twenty-five percent coffee to seventy-five percent whole milk, extra foam, vanilla sugar and a bit of cream?" A smile played on his full lips.

"Ah, yeah, how-" I was beyond confused.

"Alice called," he stated simply, by way of explanation. The words hit me like a sledgehammer. Oh fuck. It was gonna be like the fucking Spanish inquisition when I got back to our room.

"Fucking meddling, infuriating..." my hands wrapped around the warm cup, "conniving little angel," I muttered under my breath, thankful of the caffeine's effect on my system, no matter how scant the amount.

"She also told me I need to have you home by ten. Said something about needing your mints in the morning?" He looked slightly puzzled at her message, "She's a great girl, but she seems kind of...odd."

At his pronouncement, I laughed joyfully. He hit the proverbial nail on the head. My tiny friend was nothing if not complex- and puzzling and downright, fucking creepy sometimes. I swear the girl was psychic. In any case, I never bet against her.

"Ah-yeah, I have…medication. I should probably be getting…back." My tongue tripped over the words. I don't know why I couldn't just say birth control. It's not that fucking hard.

Jasper nodded slightly, "I can walk you back now, if you want." His hands were shoved into his pockets, and he examined his feet.

"Um- yeah, I really should- the same time every day-"

Yeah, nice fucking job rain man. That didn't sound strange at all.

I shook my head and stood. Suddenly, the fact that I was totally bare ass naked, with the exception of my fucking necklace and earrings, hit me. Hard. I awkwardly attempted to cover myself with my arms and looked around the room for my clothes as Jasper looked on in-appreciation. The hell?

"Good morning, darlin'," He muttered placing a sweet kiss on my lips. "I'll get your clothes. If you need-" he waved a hand towards the bathroom, and I swallowed hard, willing myself not to run. With my luck I'd fucking fall down.

I entered the room and stared at myself in the mirror for a moment. Same Bella as ever. I didn't look any different -well, except for the fucking hickey on my neck, Alice and Edward were gonna have a field day with that. So why did I feel so much - my mind flew, searching for the right word- clearer. I shook my head and splashed some cool water on my face, busying myself cleaning up and concentrating on anything but the man on the other side of the door, when a gentle knock pierced the silence.

"Bella? Your clothes are on the door." His voice was soft and kind and sexy and- okay, snap out of it girl.

"Thanks." I rolled my eyes at myself and opened the door just enough to grab the hanger he had placed on the knob and pulled it inside. I swallowed hard again as I took in my slightly wrinkled blue dress and undergarments, my face flushing as images of said clothing falling to the floor flashed through my mind.

"Stop that," I muttered, struggling into my undergarments and sliding the dress over my head. The dress I couldn't fucking zip on my own. Goddamn Alice! I twisted my tangled hair into a messy bun and took a deep, calming- hah!- breath. Holding the dress over my chest, I exited my white and chrome safe haven.

"Jasper, could you… um… help?" I felt like a bit of a fool, asking for help dressing, but he glanced up from tying his chucks and smiled.

"Of course, darlin'" He crossed the room quickly, placing his hands on my shoulders and turning my back to him before slowly sliding the zipper up. His hands rested on my shoulders for a moment, before placing a feather light kiss on my neck and stepping back.

"There we go. Perfect."

"Um, thanks," I said, turning and grinning at him like an idiot.

"Jasp-"

"Bella-"

We spoke at the same time. He chuckled, and I blushed. He was sexy. I was…red. Fuck.

"About last night-" I stumbled over the words, my mind barely functioning due to his close proximity.

"It's okay, darlin'. We can talk about later? Over lunch maybe?" He smiled as he met my eyes, and I nodded.

I struggled quickly into my godforsaken shoes and stood a moment later.

"Ready?" His voice was sweet, and he handed me my coffee as I nodded. Jasper grabbed his black fedora and dropped it on his head before gently placing his hand in the small of my back and guiding me out of the room, the door shutting behind us with a soft, reassuring click.

We spent the elevator ride in companionable silence, Jasper's arm warm and doing all kinds of funny things to my insides as he draped it over my shoulder. It felt like it belonged there.

I sighed. So fucking sappy.

We were halfway across the expansive lobby when a jovial voice reached our ears and caused us to stop dead in our tracks.

"Cuz!" Emmett's cheerful greeting echoed through the large space, and we both turned to find him strolling towards us, Rosalie not far behind him. Fuck, life wasn't fair. There had to be some sort of sick joke of genetics that this family could look so great first thing in the morning. Rosalie's lavender dress hugged and emphasized her beautiful curves, her makeup was flawless and her lustrous blond locks were piled atop her head. Emmett was smiling brightly as he approached, his blue, button-down and black vest both untucked and unbuttoned, revealing the black undershirt that was firmly tucked into his black pants. His outfit from the evening before. I suddenly felt self-conscious standing with this trio, and I could feel the gaze of some of the other guests on us, not to mention the hotel staff. Fuck that! I stood straighter and smiled a bit. I hated people staring at me, but if they were going to, I might as well make it worth it. Yeah, it was a fucked up defense mechanism, but it worked for me. Fake it till you fucking make it, baby.

"Morning, Em, Rose." Jasper greeted Emmett with a nod and hugged his sister quickly.

"Hey, bro!" Emmett's smile and enthusiasm were contagious, and he turned to face me. "Bells! Morning, sweetie!" Before I knew what was happening, he swept me into a crushing hug and spun me around. Thank God Jasper had anticipated his greeting and grabbed my coffee at the last moment; otherwise, it would be all over both of us. I gave a delighted, if loud, laugh that echoed through the lobby, drawing more attention to us. Didn't these people have anything better to do than stare at a group of 18-year-olds?

"Good morning, Emmett," I smiled as he set me down gently. "I'm fine thank you, and yourself?"

"Peachy keen, baby, peachy keen." Jesus, this guy's upbeat energy was positively addictive, and I found myself smiling wider and turning to Rosalie. I didn't even bother to mask my surprise as she embraced me warmly, the heady, familiar scent of Chanel No. 5 washing over my senses. No, I will not go there right now. I shook my head a bit to clear the thoughts, as she stepped back and spoke

"Good morning, Bella. It's nice to see you again. I had a lovely time last night, thank you so much for inviting us." Her words, like her smile, were genuine, and I was touched.

"Of course. It was my pleasure." I saw Emmett open his mouth to speak, but Rose cut him off quickly.

"Shut the fuck up, Emmett." Her voice was firm and surprisingly forceful, but her green eyes sparkled mischievously. Emmett's mouth snapped shut and his smile, if possible, got even wider.

Jasper shook his head, a slightly exasperated look on his face. It seemed as if he didn't quite know what to make of his family members.

"Ah, guys, I've got to get Bella home. See you in few?" His words were hesitant and almost… nervous? Strange.

"Of course," Rosalie responded sweetly, winking at her brother before turning back to me. "We'll have to get together again before you leave." The words were more of a command than a question, but coming from Rose it made sense. I nodded mutely as Jasper's hand returned to the small of my back.

"Bye, Bells!" Emmett's voice echoed behind us as we turned, and I heard Rosalie whack him in the chest.

"They're great," I said to Jasper as we exited through the glass doors and headed down the busy street towards my hotel.

"Oh darlin', you don't even know!" I could hear the smile behind his words as he pulled me closer to him and we finished our walk in easy silence.

"Um…I…Thank you," my voice wavered slightly as I looked up at Jasper when we stepped off the elevator directly across from my room. Fucking traitorous vocal chords.

"Of course, Bella." His words were soft, and he pulled me close, his strong arms holding me to him in a tight embrace. My own hand crept, unbidden, around his back, and I rested my head against his chest, breathing in the now familiar scent of cigarettes and sage and… something else that I couldn't identify. Something that seemed uniquely him. Whatever the fuck it was, it was intoxicating.

"Bella-"

My name was little more than a whisper, and I looked up at him briefly before rising up quickly on my toes to meet his lips in a kiss.

Where the fuck had this bold streak come from? Who the fuck cared?

I sighed against his mouth as I opened mine and met his tongue. I grasped tiny fistfuls of his shirt at the contact, and his hands tightened on my waist as the kiss slowly intensified. Fuck, this man could kiss.

"Good morning!" Alice's cheerful voice broke through my haze, and I jumped, breaking the kiss and flying back, slightly stumbling. I was relieved at Jasper's firm hold on me, which prevented me from toppling over onto my ass. Fuck that girl.

My petite friend fluttered into the hallway and grinned at us.

"Bells," she nodded her head at me, and I glared back. She responded to my not-all-that-imposing look with a wink and turned towards Jasper, who had slowly let me go.

"Morning, Mr. Whitlock." Her tone was playful and he replied in kind.

"Good morning, Alice. How are you today?" His eyes shone with humor.

"Fantastic, thank you!" She slipped her tiny arm around my waist. "Sorry to pull Isabella away from you so early, we had a last minute..." she paused, considering her words carefully, "change in plans."

Lying little imp. She wasn't sorry for a second!

"That's okay, um-yeah." He turned away from her sparkling gold eyes. "Will I see you later darlin'?" The words were whispered into my ear, his warm breath tickling my neck. I nodded mutely at him and he kissed me sweetly on the cheek. "Later, Isabella," he called over his shoulder as he headed back into the elevator.

"Bye," my voice was weak, and my knees trembled as I caught him winking just before the doors closed. Oh fuck, I had it bad.

"Come on!" Alice's voice was commanding, and she tugged on my hand with surprising force as I tripped into our room. I pushed the door shut behind me before dropping onto my bed. I giggled, closing my eyes.

"Well?" she begged, jumping on the bed next to me. "Tell me!" Her words left little room for argument.

"Yeah, Bells," Edward's voice teased, as I felt him plop down on the bed on my other side, "tell me."

"Oh fuck," I muttered, closing my eyes again, and trying, very unsuccessfully, to block out the sounds of their laughter as they both hugged me.

"I fucking hate you two," I growled, squeezing my eyes shut.

"Bells, honey, you know that's a blatant lie." Edward's voice was light as he kissed my forehead.

Yeah, the fucker was right. I could never hate them.

"Fuck you." The words meant nothing as I grinned and popped my eyes open, taking in my friends' expectant faces.

"Can I at least fucking change first?" There was no hiding the smile on my face.

"Do it quick," Edward ordered as I sat up, mirth playing over his handsome features. I pushed him aside and stood, heading towards the bureau.

"Your clothes are already in the bathroom," Alice supplied from her position on the bed, her own eyes closed and a smile playing across her pretty face.

"I fucking hate you two," I reiterated as I stomped into the bathroom and slammed the door.

"No you don't!" Alice's voice rang out. "You fucking love us, and you'd be totally lost without us! Your world would crumble and turn grey, and you'd sit in your bedroom for hours at a time, staring out your window!" I could hear the smile in her words and laughed.

She was fucking right. Again.

Fifteen minutes later, I was showered, scrubbed and dressed in Alice's version of casual- a long, black and grey v-neck cardigan, white cami top and wide-legged, grey pants. I did not, however, put on the grey heels or headband she had left me, plaiting my hair quickly and opting instead for my black chucks and my new favorite accessory- a slightly battered, grey fedora that smelled softly of cigarettes and sage and Jasper.

I smiled softly at my image in the mirror and reflected on what a fucking dork I was, before I opened the door and walked out. I quickly caught the small black package that Alice had just thrown at me. Ahh...morning mints. God fucking bless the woman, and it had to be a woman, who invented chewable, mint flavored birth control.

I grinned my thanks and threw the pack back at my friend, who caught it without even looking up from the pedicure she was putting the finishing touches on. Edward thumbed through my battered and marked up copy of Lolita, one of the three books I had brought with me on our little trip, along with Tropic of Cancer and Henry and June. I had a soft spot for elegant smut, and it was one of my little idiosyncrasies that Edward openly appreciated.

"Good book, Edward?" I teased as I plopped ungracefully on the bed next to him.

"Good night, Isabella?" he retorted, not even looking up from the page.

"Actually-" I was, once again, cut off mid-sentence by Alice.

"Wait till I'm done, I don't want her to have to go over things twice." She never even looked up at us, concentrating instead on getting the final coat of purple polish on her petite nails perfect.

I laughed and rolled my eyes at Edward, and he grinned, shutting the book with a snap. He returned it to its place on my bedside table before looking at me devilishly. Fuck.

"What?" My tone was a bit more than cautious as I looked at him, eyes shining bright with mischief.

"Nothin'," His tone was far too casual.

"Edward Anthony Masen, don't you pull that shit with me. I know that look, not to mention that innocent voice which, by the way, is about as real a Tanya Denali's tits." I smirked at him, bringing up one of his many...conquests, and he winked.

"Touché, Bells, you're in rare form this morning. I surrender." He raised his hands, and I smiled. I never beat him. Well, almost never.

"Edward don't touch her fucking hat," Alice's firm voice commanded.

"How the fuck did you know?" His jaw dropped, and his eyes twinkled, "I swear to hell, Pix," with a grin, he threw in the dreaded molestation of a nickname that only he could use and not get hit,"you must be psychic."

"Maybe," she chirped, wiggling her toes before standing up on her bed and jumping over to mine. She collapsed on Edward, placing a big kiss on his cheek.

"So, Miss Isabella," the fucking annoying pixie drawled my name with a grin, "spill, babe. All of it." I looked into the eager, shining eyes of my friends and sighed.

"I fucking hate you two."

"It's a good thing we love you then, or there'd be a big issue." Alice's tone was matter of fact.

"Come on, Bells, give us something...Christ, we've been keeping your pretty self in pervy tales for, how long's it been now, Pix?" he glanced at Alice, "three years?"

Alice nodded at him, resting her head in his lap and her feet in mine.

"Three years, July fourth," she muttered, and Edward began massaging her scalp.

Three years what? What the fuck? Why did… Then it dawned on me.

"Oh my fucking God!" I shrieked, trying not to laugh. "You two…and… together!" My mind would not process this information.

"Jesus Christ, Harpy," Edward muttered with a smile, "I think I may be deaf now, thanks."

"You assholes! Why didn't you tell me?'' I still refused to believe that my two best friends had been...together. It was just too...incestuous.

"Jesus, drama queen much?" Alice teased. "If you shut up for a minute, we can tell, but you will sure as hell be elaborating on your evening." The girl still hadn't opened her eyes.

"Okay," I said quietly, leaning back against the headboard and looking at them. "Well?"

"So, 4th of July when we were fifteen..." Edward's lyrical voice began, and I closed my eyes, just listening.

Pups' fic rec corner….okay babes today's rec is the STUPENDOUS Going Under for the Third Time by the amazing busymommy. Go read…..there is Surfsper. I promise you won't be disappointed.