Team Rocket and the Snow Queen

by Russian Blue Witch

A cross-over with Hans Christian Andersen's fairy tale... and also has elements from Neopets for stupid reasons. It's an older story of mine and therefore not very good, but I still think it has charm.

2. Chapter 2

Team Rocket and the Snow Queen

Part 2

"Okay, my real mommy will be here in a few hours, so please read me the rest of the story mommy!"
"On one condition."
"What's that?"
"Don't call me mommy ever again."
"Aw, mommy!"
"All right, that's it; I'm not reading you the end. Ever."
"No! No! Oh… all right, mo- all right."
"Good. So, where were we?"
"Growlie was napping."
"Oh yes. So, the Meowth realized that speed was of the essence, so he took Jessie to a nearby village and asked the stable master to bring out 'the queen's steed'. The stable master brought Jessie a Rapidash unlike any she had ever seen. Its mane was of blue flame, and it had wings- flaming blue wings that otherwise looked like angels wings."
"There's no such thing, mommy."
"This is a story and I can do whatever I like. Just be glad I didn't use a Uni.
"The Uni- I mean the Rapidash flew Jessie over the fields at a rapid speed, and though it took Meowth weeks to travel from the ice palace to the old woman's house, they finished the journey in just a day, landing at the icy waterfall.
" 'This waterfall is really a portal through dimensional space,' Meowth explained. 'You have to dive in and let it carry you.'
" 'But I can't swim!' Jessie protested.
" 'You don't have to swim; the waterfall will carry you. Were you listening?'
" 'But I don't like the water!'
" 'I know you don't like the water, and there's a reason for that. But you can survive this, and I can't. I have to go in another way, but it's too small for you. You have to do this to rescue James.'
"That did it for Jessie. She perched at the brink of the water, took a deep breath, and dove in.
"I've already described what the journey is like, but for Jessie it was a nightmare. She couldn't breathe, she was going numb, she was blacking out, she was dying…
"Suddenly she was dragged out of the water by someone strong, someone huge, someone… furry.
" 'Look what I found, my lady,' a gruff voice said.
" 'Well, well,' a woman purred, 'a little drowned rat.'
"Jessie pried her eyes open and screamed- she was being held by an enormous purple Lupe!
" 'What should we do with her, my lady?' The Lupe asked.
"The woman tapped her chin a bit. 'Let me think… how about we deal with that little puppy first? Make an example?'
" 'What-' Jessie attempted to ask, but the Lupe whapped her on the head. The Snow Queen crossed the room to the cage that used to hold Meowth and now held Growlie. She lifted the cage gently off the chain, ignoring the angry glares the Fire Pokémon was giving her.
" 'Let's thrown them into the Icy Lake,' the Snow Queen announced.
"Jessie and Growlie were carried into a huge room that looked like it held a swimming pool. But something seemed odd about the water; it was almost too transparent to look like water. Odder still, it was not frozen. The Snow Queen dipped her hand into the pool and sighed happily, then lifted her hand out. To Jessie's surprise, the drops of water turned into little whisps that vanished, leaving the queen's hand dry.
" 'You see,' the Snow Queen said, 'There are more liquids besides water. Some liquids can keep from freezing at drastically low temperatures. In fact, the liquid in this pool needs to be kept at a constant temperature of about -300 degrees Fahrenheit, just to stay liquid! As you can see, when I draw liquid out of the pool, it turns back into a gas. All right, kids, that's the end of today's chemistry class. Now to take a little field trip.'
" 'What are you doing?' a familiar voice cried out. Everyone whirled around to see James standing there, horrified.
"Jessie decided to take this opportunity to set James straight. 'James! Stop this crazy woman!' she cried.
" 'You stay out of this,' The Snow Queen snarled. 'You are a favorite of mine for now. Don't push it.'
" 'But that girl is my friend!' James dashed forward.
" 'All right, you asked for it,' the Snow Queen snarled, dropping Growlie's cage and seizing James. Before James could do anything, she planted a kiss smack on his forehead. Being kissed is an awful enough fate under normal circumstances, but the Snow Queen's kisses, as I have already indicated, were special. This time, the kiss froze not his nerves, but his heart. He swayed a little, then stood steady, a completely blank look in his eyes.
" 'What did you do to him?' Jessie demanded.
" 'Nothing,' the Snow Queen smiled, 'nothing you need concern yourself about.'
" 'You… you… heartless woman!' Jessie cried, distressed that she didn't know any swear words."
"She could have used censored or censored, mummy."
"You little censored! Where did you ever learn such language? And don't call me that! I thought I told you that if you called me that I would stop reading!"
"No, you said that if I called you mommy you would stop reading. I called you mummy. Like the Egyptians."
"That has to be the weirdest stereotype I have ever heard… but as I was saying…
" 'You… you… heartless woman!' Jessie cried, distressed that she didn't know any swear words.
" 'Dear, dear,' the Snow Queen replied, 'How dare you talk to your mother that way?'
"She lowered her hood, revealing for the first time her beautiful, deep red hair. Jessie gasped. It was true: the dark red color exactly matched her own hair, and the eyes matched her eyes, and the skin color matched her skin color…
" 'Oh, look how similar we are,' the Snow Queen purred. 'Are you sure we aren't related? Oh wait a moment… we are! Ha ha, silly me, right?'
"Jessie sat down by the icy lake, stunned.
" 'Come, my dear,' the Snow Queen purred, holding out her hand. 'Now that I have you, I want nothing. I had fun playing with this silly child for a while…' she shoved James roughly forward, and he collapsed on the floor as helpless as a doll, 'but now I grow weary of him. Throwing him into the icy lake would be fun, don't you think, daughter dearest?
"Jessie snapped out of her trance. 'G-Growlie,' she commanded, 'Attack her!'
"The Snow Queen stepped out of the way as the flames roared towards her, and merely melted a little. But the flames soared into the icy lake.
"I don't expect you to know this, and Jessie certainly didn't know this, at least not at the time, but -300 degrees Fahrenheit is approximately the freezing point of oxygen. And I don't expect an ignorant brat like you to know this either, but oxygen ignites a lot more readily than water. Much more readily. In short order, the icy lake turned into a flaming lake.
"The Snow Queen screamed and lunged toward Jessie, about to push her in, but James, who had thawed out in the heat, screamed 'No!' and dove forward, showing the Snow Queen into the flames. The flames were especially hot from all the oxygen they were getting, and so it took only seconds for the Snow Queen to turn to water vapor… and James to turn into ash."
"That's me!"
"What?"
"I'm Ash!"
"YOU RUINED THE DRAMATIC DEATH SCENE! YOU WILL DIE!"
The woman chased Ash around the house for a few minutes before they collapsed with exhaustion and the woman forgot what she had been angry about, and so she continued the story.
"Once again, Jessie sat by the side of the now-empty pool, too shocked to move."
"Why was it empty?"
"Because all the oxygen had burned up and the fire could no longer survive. Oxygen does not burn for very long."
"What about Balthazar?"
"Er, what? Oh, him, uh… he'd left. Or something."
"He has really lousy timing."
"Tell me about it. Anyway, the Meowth then joined Jessie by the side of the pool.
" 'What happened?' He asked. Jessie was too distraught to answer, but Growlie filled him in.
" 'Well, congratulations!' Meowth said, seizing Jessie's hand and shaking it.
" 'Con-con-what?' Jessie said, shocked.
" 'You have fulfilled the prophecy and have proved yourself the true daughter of the Fire Queen.'
" 'B-but I thought…'
" 'She was lying. Duh. Anybody can claim to be somebody's mother, but that doesn't make it true.'
" 'But… wait, there was a prophecy? And I'm a Fire Princess?'
" 'Sort of. The prophecy goes like this: The princess will return to defeat the Queen of Ice and liberate her captive people from their new employment as lights. The lake of ice will become the lake of fire, and a rich human from whom nothing was ever asked will pay the ultimate price.'
" 'Why didn't you tell me about the prophecy sooner?'
" 'Because you probably wouldn't have liked the line at the end. You don't, do you?'
" 'No! Of course not!'
" 'There you go. Oh, actually, technically the line at the end is "And then a kiss shall melt the ice," but that's not really important..."
" 'But… but…' Jessie was on the verge of tears and she hated crying. 'But… why did James… why did he have to…'
"Meowth sighed heavily. 'You must have picked up some sentimentality from that human boy. But your job isn't done.'
" 'What now?' Jessie demanded, whirling around. 'Is there some Darkest Faerie I have to defeat or something?'
" 'No, it's just the remaining part of the prophecy: she will liberate her captive people from their new employment as lights. You see the lights in these walls? Captive faeries, every one of them. You need to melt the ice and free them. And your mom is in the castle basement. You need to free her too. I trust you know how to do this?'
" 'Um… not really.'
" 'Just melt the ice. Place your hands on them and sing the warmth spell. You do know the warmth spell, don't you?'
"Much to Jessie's surprise, she discovered that she did. Shortly, the room was filled with faeries, of all the elements except fire- water, earth, air, light and dark.
" 'The fire faeries are in the basement,' Meowth told her, so they went downstairs and freed all those faeries too.
" 'Wonderful,' said Meowth, clapping his paws. 'Now we have enough faeries to do a revival spell! I trust you know that song, too?' He asked Jessie.
"All the faeries surrounded the beautiful statue James had been admiring and chanted the revival song. The statue started to glow… but then the glow faded.
" 'What happened?' All the faeries asked each other.
" 'Hey, Jessie!' Meowth snapped. 'You need to put some more enthusiasm into your singing or it won't work!'
" 'I can't be enthusiastic!' Jessie snapped. 'James is dead! Don't you have some kind of resurrection song or something?'
"The faeries looked at each other guiltily. 'We don't have any such song, my lady,' a fire faerie said apologetically.
" 'Then… then I will make one up!' Jessie dashed up the stairs, back to the not-so-icy no-longer-a-lake, and stood in front of the ashes. She began to dance around, waving her arms in random patterns, singing, 'I summon the power of Comic Book Death! By the powers of Superman, Batman and Captain America, by the powers of Bucky, Jean Grey and the second Robin, by the powers of Resurrection Man, Radioactive Man, and Fallout Boy, come back, James! Come back to me!' She whirled around and glared at the faeries surrounding her. 'Well? What are you waiting for? Sing with me!'
"The faeries, looking very embarrassed, sang along. Jessie threw herself into the dance, not caring how silly she looked. But finally, she stopped and stared at the ash pile. Nothing had happened. Nothing at all.
" 'It-it didn't work!' Jessie wailed.
" 'What didn't work?' James asked.
" 'Augh! JAAAAAMES!' Jessie tackled him. 'Don't do that to me!'
" 'Don't do what?' James asked.
" 'Never mind,' said Jessie. 'Okay, now let's go save that petrified faerie who happens to be my mother!'
"All the faeries surrounded the statue, ready to chant. James joined the circle next to Jessie.
" 'Um, no," Meowth said. 'Not gonna work, human boy. Only faeries are allowed in the faerie ring.'
" 'But-but- but you aren't a faerie!' James said.
" 'No, but I'm a faerie creature.'
" 'But Jessie isn't a faerie!'
" 'Actually, she is. You're just too dense to figure that out on your own. Go sit in a corner.'
" 'Hey!' Jessie said. 'My friend can stay wherever he wants!' she gripped James' arm tight.
" 'Sorry, my lady, but if James is here the spell won't work.' Meowth tore Jessie and James apart.
"James went and sat on a bench , moping.
"The faeries, Jessie, and Meowth began chanting and hoping about.
"But Meowth had forgotten one of the most potent powers of the Snow Queen: she could freeze not just water, not just air, not just hearts, not just faeries in stone or ice, but she could freeze time. It was this ability that allowed her to 'teleport' when in reality, she simply froze time and relocated.
"See, I did explain how Growlie could follow the scent of a teleportation. So there.
"So it was that all the faeries, Jessie, and Meowth ceased to chant and dance and stood still, frozen as statues. Everything else froze, also: The bubbling beakers, the drafty air, the waterfall in the nearby room... everything had stopped moving entirely, except 3 creatures.
"One was, of course, the Snow Queen. Laughing manically, she scooped up the frozen form of Jessie in her arms, then picked up Meowth for good measure.
"Another was Balthazar, who picked up the statue that the faeries had been dancing around.
"And the last one was-"
"James!"
"How did you guess?"
"It was just a little bit obvious."
"Whatev. Anyway, James realized that they had not realized that he was still mobile. In fact, they didn't even acknowledge his existence. He was kind of far off, and of course they weren't looking for him because they thought he was dead.
"James had no idea what he should do, but he followed the Snow Queen and Balthazar anyway.
" 'This palace is so nice,' the Snow Queen mused, 'and I hate to abandon it, but it really can't be helped. This time we'll take the queen, the brat, and the talking cat somewhere where no one will ever find them.'
"Balthazar rolled his eyes. 'Uh, your majesty, wouldn't it be simpler to just kill them right now?'
" 'Maybe,' the Snow Queen admitted, 'but this is a kids story.'"
"She didn't really say that, did she?"
"No, but I'm not going to tell you what she really said because we're in a kids story too. Or rather, a K+ story."
"Huh?"
"Never mind, dearie.
"James knew he needed to do something to stop the Snow Queen, but what?"
"Is this related to the last line of the prophecy?" The annoying boy asked.
"Actually, yes. James remembered the last line of the prophecy-"
"But he was dead at the time it was mentioned!"
"Oh, I don't know how he knew about it! Maybe Jessie or Meowth mentioned it to him after he came back to life! But anyways, he remembered it, so as he was following the Snow Queen around, the Snow Queen stopped to open a door and set Jessie down to do it... and James stole up, and was about to kiss Jessie-"
"Eew!"
"Exactly. James felt the same way, since he was a young boy and all, and he hesitated just long enough, that the Snow Queen, who is not such a slow door-opener, noticed him and grabbed him, snarling and yanking him up by the collar. 'You little rat! I thought you were dead!'
"And in that split second, James realized what he must do. He grabbed the queen's collar, pulled himself a bit higher, and pecked the queen on the cheek before he could stop himself.
"The Snow Queen's scream shook the palace as she crumbled into tiny shards of ice.
"Balthazar wisely realized he should get lost before the palace was full of vengeful faeries, so he dropped the statue and left. Time unfroze, the faeries completed their dance, and the statue turned into Jessie's mother, the Fire Faerie Queen, yada yada... All right, so it isn't exactly finished. But you get the picture."
"Crazy story, Mommmy."
"I said not to call me that!"
"Mommy?"
"Don't call me that."
"The story wasn't about you and Uncle James, was it?"
"Why is it you call me Mommy and call my husband Uncle James?"
"You avoided the question-"
The doorbell rang.
"Oh, I think that's your real mother. Let me get that."
Jessie stood up and moved to the door.
"Mrs. Ketchum! So glad you're back!"
"All the more so because I can now take my son off of your hands, correct?"
"You know me too well. All right, Ash, time to go home!"
"Aw, man!"
And Jessie, queen of the Fire Faeries, watched Ash and his mother fly home.

The End.