Author's Note: I decided to continue – even though I'm flying blind right now. I do not have a clear plan people. There's a first time for everything, I guess…

I bow down in gratitude, for my amazing Beta: Marina. You are beyond amazing, beyond wonderful and beyond every other synonym I could ever come up with.

Disclaimer: I do not own any of these characters, Kishimoto does. I only own my own creativity and just a little courage.

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Just A Little Courage

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I must´ve changed clothes a dozen times already, whishing I owned something that wasn´t part of the standard Konoha shinobi uniform. Unsure what Genma will be wearing, I keep fiddling with the hem of my shirt. If he shows up in civilian clothes, I might very well be done for. It´s nearing seven o´clock now, and my heart seems to be trying to force its way out of my chest. My lungs refuse to take in enough air and I think I might be having a panic attack. I´ve been watching this man from a suitable distance for almost four years, I don't really think I can deal with him being that close to me. I don't even know what the hell I was thinking last night! One minute I was catching up with a couple of old friends from my academy days, the next I found myself in a rather disgusting bar, trying to catch the eye of someone who´s so far beyond my league that he might as well live in another dimension. And yet… He kissed me. Asked me out on this date. Before returning to his buddies, that is. Maybe that´s a sign? Maybe he went back to brag about his latest conquest? But no, Genma doesn't seem like that kind of guy. Granted, I don't know much about him to be honest, but still… He doesn't seem like the kind that would use someone else's feelings just to look good in front of his friends. Or at least, I certainly hope not.

I'm so nervous that my teeth are clattering, my hands are sweating and I can't stay still. So I start pacing. Back and forth through my small apartment, back and forth. Did I make the right decision here? Was I a fool for ever going to see Genma in the first place? Is this a pity thing? No, I honestly don't think so. But at the same time... Why would he want to go out with me? I want to go out with him because he's hot, and cool and funny, and caring, and hot. Oh, and did I mention yet how hot he is? But I've only ever admired Genma Shiranui from a distance, never before gotten even within a couple feet of the guy. I was too scared I'd give myself away. Too scared that he might be grossed out by the idea of dating another man. And even if he wasn't, there's no way I'd ever be good enough. After all, I'm just a schoolteacher, I'm just the guy that tries to teach the youngest generation the basics so their jounin sensei can take it from there. I lay the groundwork, nothing more really. Genma is a tokubetsu, a Hokage guard. No way I could ever match up to that.

I jump as I hear the knock on the door. Three in a row, quick succession, confident. Oh boy, Genma´s so far ahead of me it´s almost painful. Swallowing, I try to smooth out the wrinkles in my shirt before moving to the door. My knees are trembling so bad I have to hold on to the wall for support. I´m pathetic. I bet that's not even Genma. And if it is, he probably just came to laugh at me for thinking he´s really here to pick me up for a date. I´m so sure.

Reaching for the doorknob, my hand is shaking so much I almost can´t turn it. But eventually, I succeed, taking a deep breath before pulling the door towards me. I try to look casual, try to look as if I´m fine with whatever, even try to look bored. But there´s a hot blush on my cheeks that probably renounces all of that. A sigh works its way up, but I manage to hold it back, my eyes finally catching sight of Genma Shiranui, standing just outside my door.

He´s wearing his uniform, flack vest and all. Thank heavens, I´m not the only one who´s wearing shinobi attire, though it makes it even more difficult to believe that he´s not here just to make fun of me. Though the slight blush on his cheeks might disprove that notion again. On the other hand – it could just as well be suppressed laughter. After all, what the hell do I know?
His hands are pushed deep inside his pockets, his stance just shy of looking relaxed. The small smile playing around his lips could mean just about anything. The tiny frown on his brow is anything but reassuring.

I try to swallow the lump in my throat away, "Hey…"

His smile widens a little, but the slight frown stays in place, "Hey Iruka," He clearly hesitates for a moment, and I stand frozen, "You ready to go?" His tone is quiet, and as his jaw moves a little, I can hear a strange, soft sound. Was that… Teeth against metal? Did he just bite down on that senbon? Wow… His dentist bill must be huge…

"Eh, just a moment. Let me grab my vest and shoes…" I bite my lip, turning away to do as I said. A frown settles on my brow, should I've invited him in? I mean, my flack vest is just on the hook behind the door, my shoes are right here. But… Isn't that like, normal date etiquette? I honestly wouldn't know. Last date I went on was almost two years ago, and we'd agreed to meet at the restaurant that time. I don't exactly go around giving out my address to random guys – wait a minute! Hold on…

Turning back to him, I know my eyes are wide, and there's fear in my voice no matter how hard I try to hide it, "How the hell did you know where I live…?"

"Eh…" As Genma rubs the back of his head, he takes a small step back. And once again I hear that weird sound that seems to indicate him biting down on the senbon in his mouth, "I kind of… Pulled your file. I messed up last night, I didn't realize that I actually didn't know where I'd be picking you up, and… Well, I couldn't contact you to ask either, because I didn't know where you live, so… Today, I… Pulled your file," He swallows hard, hurrying to add, "I didn't look at anything else, I promise! I only needed the address, I didn't mean to impose on your privacy or anything, really!"

His hands are lifted in a surrendering gesture, but that doesn't exactly change anything for me. My tone soft and almost threatening, "My address is secret, Genma. It's not in my regular file. Just my mailbox at the academy. So you pulled the private file, and I'm not too sure if I'm okay with that…"

"Look, Iruka," He takes a step towards me, his hands coming down a little in a soothing gesture, "Like I said, I only checked the address. I pulled the regular file first, and like you said, it wasn't in there. But I still had to find a way to show up here on time so… I pulled a favor and got access to the file vault. I guess I just assumed that all academy sensei have their address kept secret to ward off annoying parents… But I take it that's not the case, huh?"

I shrug, "Some do. I have other reasons," Swallowing, I bite my lip, looking up at the older man. For a few seconds, I ponder my options before motioning for him to follow me as I retreat into my apartment. Behind me, I can hear him take off his sandals before closing the door. Soft footsteps follow me and for a second, I'm scared. But I shrug it off once more, I'm pretty confident that Genma Shiranui isn't the one that forced me to move, to hide my address.

Sinking down on my couch, I point to the chair across from me, and Genma immediately sits down. He must've caught on to my nerves, because he's moving slowly, deliberately. I have to admit, it helps. I take a deep breath, but my voice will not rise above a whisper, "I never told anyone this before, only the people at the security office… When I came out a couple of years ago, there were some… Troubles," I smile wryly, "I expected as much, so I wasn't really upset about that. Most people accepted it and the little wrinkles were smoothed out soon enough. But a few months later…" I sigh, unsure how to say this without sounding stuck-up or self obsessed, "I got a picture in the mail. Someone took it through one of my windows. Me and my… Date, at the time," My nose wrinkles a little, it seems so wrong to tell Genma, the guy I've been wanting to date for ages that I was on another date at the time. But I figure that if I explain anyway, it wouldn't do to keep that part out, "Anyway, the picture itself was pretty benign, I guess. I mean, nothing happened anyway, so… But it didn't stop there. Pictures kept coming in the mail, taken through the windows in my apartment. They got… Scary. Eyes crossed out, death threats written across them. Eventually… I couldn't take it anymore, so I went to see the security officers. They helped me relocate, switched my personal info to 'private'. But they never got the person responsible. So… People showing up at my door is… A little frightening sometimes… And I didn't realize last night either, by the way. I mean, this was years ago. But the second I realize that someone shouldn't actually know where I live…" My voice trails off and I look away uncomfortably.

"I see…" Genma's tone is soft, gentle, "I'm really sorry, I didn't know any of that. I think I'd get a little freaked too if someone just calmly showed up here after that… I'm really sorry Iruka, I honestly didn't realize…"

"It's okay," I offer him a small smile, "Like I said, years ago. Still…" Worrying the inside of my lip, I pull at a loose threat on my worn couch, "I'm sorry, I basically forced you to do that, and then I almost threaten you for looking up my address…"

"Iruka," He leans over, clearly attempting to look me in the eyes. I swallow, but look up despite how insecure I feel, "I doubt I'd have reacted any different. All you did was let people know a small part of who you are, and you got death threats in return. That's just sick. I guess I'm lucky in that regard, worst I ever got were a few jokes that didn't exactly come out right. But you have my word, Iruka Umino: I will not divulge this address to anyone, and if I ever find out who did that to you, they're going to get a piece of my mind. And trust me, they won't like it very much," He almost chuckles, winking at me, "Protection is what I do best, Iruka."

I smile, it's an involuntary response to how safe he makes me feel. It's really incredible, the things I did these past two days. I can hardly believe I even went to that bar, and now I pretty much told someone I barely even know my biggest secret… This feels weird, but strangely liberating at the same time, "Thank you. I'm really sorry for going off on you like that…"

"I'd have done the same, Iruka. People pointing a camera at you through the windows of your own apartment is downright scary," He frowns a little, his gaze drifting over to the window, hidden behind thick curtains. I've learned to live in dim light, too afraid to let the sun – and possibly the camera – inside.

"Have you gotten any more word from this person since you moved? Through the academy mailbox or something?"

"No…" I worry the inside of my lip for a few seconds, "I've always thought that was kind of strange too…"

Genma nods thoughtfully, "Maybe it was one of your old neighbors and they didn't actually know where you work. That's the only plausible explanation that I can come up with anyway. Had any more trouble since you moved?"

I shake my head, but then stop, remembering something, "Only one incident… But I'm actually not even sure if it was aimed at me personally, so…"

Genma's eyes are serious, as is his expression, "Would you please tell me about it?"

I swallow, looking away for a minute. This is embarrassing, and besides that… I want to get to know this man, I want to go on dates with him. That's right, plural. I think I like him even more than I ever thought I did. So I don't really want to tell him this…

Getting up, I worry the inside of my lip again, "Can I get you something to drink?"

Genma's smile is soft, "That long a story, huh? Please, what do you have?"

"Not that long, I suppose. Just that uncomfortable…" Shocked at my own openness, I swallow hard, but I try to hide it, continuing, "I've got tea, coffee, eh… I think some orange juice…"

He smiles again, "Coffee please. And don't worry so much, okay? I honestly wouldn't be here if I didn't want to, and I wouldn't be asking these things if I didn't think I could help. Besides," Genma chuckles lightly, "I've never been a huge fan of the first date chit-chat that leads to absolutely nowhere. I want to get to know you better, I may or may not be particularly interested in the weather…"

He smiles at me, and for some reason I find myself heavily resisting the urge to hug this man. Which would probably be about the tenth embarrassing thing I did today. Smiling back, I retreat into my kitchen. As I make the preparations for two servings of coffee, my mind wanders a little. Tentatively trying to find a way to comply with Genma's request. On one hand, I want to tell him everything. He makes me feel safe, and he somehow gives off this vibe that he might actually be able to solve the riddle of who's behind all this. But at the same time… I sigh, picking up the two large mugs and walking back to the living room.

Genma's still sitting in the lounge chair, his legs crossed as he comfortably leans back. Seeing he hasn't moved is an immense relief for me – even though I don't even really understand why. I just don't like the thought of people walking around in my private space when I'm not around, I guess.

As I enter the living room, he looks up, a warm smile on his face, "Ah… That's what I call a cup of coffee… I never understood those people that show up with those tiny little cups," He chuckles a little, accepting the mug from me.

"I didn't know if you take milk or sugar, so –"

"Nope, black," Winking, he takes a sip, letting out a small, appreciative sigh.

I chuckle a little, sitting back down on the couch and taking a sip of my own coffee. Setting the coffee down on the side table beside me, I pull my legs up, wrapping my arms around them as I turn my body a little so the position is more comfortable, "So… The, eh… Incident…"