2
At seven o'clock the next morning, Tsunade's eyes shot open. The squawking of birds had disturbed her dreams of riches and successful gambling. In her sleepy daze, she remembered being showered in wads of money, some so heavy they hurt; it had been bliss.
Damn those birds! Tsunade was getting a migraine, because Shizune had left the window wide open. What a moron. She swung the bell sitting on her bedside table with unnecessary vigour, and the sound seemed to reverberate in her skull like a squash ball. When her lady-in-waiting didn't appear, the Hokage grew more irate. Such an undependable girl. Tsunade stood up, as the warm summer light sailed into the room and struck her face. Then, something inside her shivered, making her convulse horribly.
What was it?
'I have a feeling', growled Tsunade to the empty room, feeling the tiny, almost inconceivable hairs rise on her arms, 'Someone very stupid, has just done something very, very, annoying. And I'm going to have to sort it out'.
The birds continued to cry, almost in warning, as though upset by a sudden change in the world, as Tsunade slammed the window shut with a sigh.
How could I have overslept? screamed a panicked little voice inside Shizune's mind. Tsunade's going to kill me! Despite the girl's hectic state of mind as she rushed across the courtyard from her chamber to the main building, where Tsunade slept, her hair sticking up like a bird's nest had been planted on her head, Shizune knew full-well that she had been exhausted by both physical exertion and mental disarray the night before.
The night had been horrible, filled with anxiety and sickening fear. The bed sheet would have to be washed tonight – it was drenched in cold sweat. All through the night, into the late hours of the morning even, one single, blood-chilling fact had been running circles around her head like a broken record; Shizune had killed two people! (Well, said a more sarcastic voice in her head, one and a half. Tonton hardly qualified as a person) Shizune shook the dangerous thought away, literally, as she skittered up the stairs of the building. Then, she stopped and swerved, jumping back down four steps at a time. Forgot the tea!
As she jumped to the floor with a thump, almost falling over in her heeled shoes, a yellow, latex glove fell from the pocket of her robe. Shizune stared at it for a moment, wondering where it had come from. It was strange; she was so tired that she couldn't even perceive the red smudges covering the glove for a few seconds. Then all at once it hit her again, that wave of icy water. She squealed, and fumbled for it on the floor, stuffing it into her robe.
What the hell had Shizune gotten herself in to?
Despite the somewhat morose cloud that had settled over Shizune's head that day, outside in the centre of the Leaf the sun was shining, making the roofs of the many houses and shops glisten pleasantly. It was early morning; breakfast time, and Chojji, Ino and Shikamaru were making their way towards the now demolished BBQ.
'You know, Chojji', whined Ino, bored, 'There are other restaurants in this village that might be just as good as the BBQ. We don't have to come here every day'.
Chojji slowed his pace, which had been relentlessly quick beforehand, and Ino saw his ear twitch irritably. Shikamaru chuckled cynically.
'Ino, you should know better than most (but not me, because I'm Chojji's best friend, and I love rubbing it in your face, loner)that he has a certain affinity with roast pork, chicken and beef that just can't be satisfied anywhere else'
'Rosharosharosh! How could you EVER suggest it, Ino?' burst Chojji, 'I need pork because as a ninja, I'm required to be STRONG'.
'But, surely as a ninja, you know, perfectly at harmony with everything, calm, practical and all that, you should be willing to accept that there are - OW'
There was a snap as Chojji stamped on Ino's foot, throwing his 120 kilo mass behind the attack. Several of the bones in Ino's foot, along with all the toes, were broken.
'Oh my God, ow!' Ino fell onto her behind, and began cradling her limp foot. As they walked past, various shoppers and pedestrians were forced to move around her; they tutted at her selfishness.
'Jeez, Ino', groaned Shikamaru, 'Man up, will ya?'
'Shikamaru!' cried Ino through tears, 'Didn't you -?'
'Hey', said Chojji in a curious tone, 'What's going on over at the BBQ?'
A crowd had assembled around the building, about 50 yards ahead of them. The restaurant itself wasn't visible, but there was a high-pitched, indistinguishable yelling coming from the centre of the gathering.
'GUYS! I think I've broken my - '
'Whatever, Ino', said Shikamaru, strolling after Chojji, who was sprinting surprisingly fast for a fat-ass, towards the crowd, 'Don't you ever wonder why you never get any impressive moments when we go on missions? It's 'cause you're a whiner. Ciao.'
After a few minutes of gazing after her partner in bewilderment, Ino managed to hoist herself up, and hobble to the local hospital, muttering angry curses as she went.
Meanwhile, in the Hokage's private quarters, Tsunade still awaited her morning mug of tea. She was dressed, and ready to begin her day's paper work and shouting at people lower than her in rank, when the door was rapped upon shakily.
'Enter', said Tsunade, curtly.
Shizune walked through the door, slowly, as she had to balance a tray of tea, biscuits and bread in one hand whilst opening the door with the other.
'What happened, Shizune?' demanded the Hokage.
'Oh, Tsunade-sensei, I'm sorry! Though I have no excuse other than that I overslept. I am terribly - '
Her voice was like a torn tissue flailing in the wind. Tsunade studied her with hawk eyes, then said, 'Fine. You can bring that into my office, Shizune'.
'Yes, Madam'.
As Tsunade left the room, her face contorted into an expression of great boredom, the tinkle of china sounded from behind her. She turned, quick as lightning, to see that Shizune had dropped the tea on the floor. The girl was gaping, in horror, at a loss for words. Her hands were quivering. Tsunade didn't say a word for several seconds. Instead she watched Shizune, as she fell to her knees and began picking up the broken pieces of crockery. She analysed her every asset; her darting eyes, her sweating forehead, her incessant gasps of apology. But most of all, her hands, pale and almost uncontrollable. It was something Tsunade had never seen, and didn't like at all. There was trouble in the air.
'Get me another cup, Shizune'.
'Yes, m'lady'.
'Oh, and Shizune?' The girl looked up from the floor at the woman's strange tone, 'Could you bring Tonton with you? I'm guessing she stayed with you last night, but you know I hate it when you keep her'.
After she'd left the room, Shizune struggled to grasp the air for her lungs. Oh God, she thought, The Pig.
'Mmm, Sakura-Sakura-Sakura, where are you Sakura?'
'Naruto, shut up'.
'But I need ma Sakura! Where is she, Kakashi-sensei?'
'If I knew that, I would have told you sooner. Probably. I forget things like that, sometimes. Mmm, make-out tactics'.
Kakashi, Naruto and Sai were waiting in a broad, dirty road of the village, waiting for Sakura to meet them and for their next mission to begin.
'You're such a perv, Sensei', muttered Naruto, glancing down the street with an eye out for the girl.
'By saying that, Naruto, I would say you are a hypocrite', said Sai in his usual Microsoft-Sam voice.
'Yeah', laughed Kakashi, tearing his eyes away from the 'novel' and chuckling, 'You itch your crotch unfailingly whenever you catch sight of that billboard-brow of hers'.
'… Why would you look at my crotch, Sensei?'
'Shut up'.
'It appears some one is coming' said Sai, missing the allusion behind the question, 'Possibly Sakura'.
Naruto, who was glaring at Kakashi, visibly lit up. 'Where? Where? Wh – Oh. It's Ino'.
Ino had indeed hobbled towards them, the broken ankle greatly compromising her usual 'lightning-fast agility' (pfft).
''Sup, Ino', said Naruto, dully.
'Nothing', she practically spat as she walked past.
'Jeez, calm it, Ino. What happened to your foot'.
'That fat-ass Chojji crushed it, then ran off to the BBQ. Moron'.
Naruto burst out laughing, and Ino shot him a poisonous glare. Even Kakashi had to seal his lips to control himself.
'It's not funny!' she screamed, 'I need to get to the hospital'.
'I can take you' said Sai, 'We're waiting for Sakura, anyway'.
One could almost see Ino's eyes water with sentiment as she goggled at Sai. Even Naruto's chuckles couldn't distract her from Sai for a few moments.
'Yes, please' she whispered, blushing as Sai offered her his shoulder and the two walked slightly faster towards the hospital.
'You know, Ino', called Kakashi coolly, 'This is why the only action you got against Kakuzu was throwing a kunai, which missed. You need to man-up'.
'SHUT UP!'.
''Kay, just sayin''
'By the way, Sensei, some shiz is going down at the BBQ, might wanna go check it out. I would have stayed, but... '
'You got fat-ass on your foot?'
'Yeah'
'I understand, let's go Naruto'.
'But I wanna see Sakuraaa'.
'Urgh, gay'.