I leant against the gym wall and fell to the floor. I brought my knees up and rested my head against them, wrapping my arms around myself, trying to hold myself together, as my sobs broke free. I had never felt pain like this. I thought for sure that the moment I moved I would shatter into a million pieces, so I stayed there for... I dont know how many hours. It was a sunday, so nobody came in. Dimitri and I had been the only ones to use the gym on a sunday, and we didnt actually practice. We simply used it as a place where we could spend time together.
I could feel Lissa's worry for me, I had arranged to meet her in her room so that I could tell her about the baby, so when I hadnt turned up, she had become ore and ore worried for me, as more time passed. She already knew about Dimitri and my relationship, she had been shocked, and a little mad and upset that I had kept it from her, but she understood that we hadnt wanted to tell anybody about us, until after graduation. Now she was over the moon for us. A few people knew about us now, Lissa, Christian, Adrian, Eddie, Mia and Alberta. They were all happy for us and promised to keep it a secret until Dimitri and I choose to tell other people. It had shocked me that Dimitri had told Alberta about us, then I realised she was a close friend of his, and it was only fair that Dimitri should have somebody to confide in, like I had Lissa. All of a sudden Lissa's eotions became to strong for her to handle and I was instantly pulled into her head.
She was talking to Alberta in her office. "Okay Vasilisa, calm down. Please, we will find her-" she was cut off by a knock on the door. "Come in" she called to whoever it was. Dimitri and Tasha came into view. Lissa smiled at them, happy to see them, at least for now anyway. "Dimitri, have you seen Rose at all today?" she asked. He shook his head, with a pained look in his eyes. "Not since this morning princess." he told her. Tasha spoke next, she was positively bouncing in her place. "Dimitri has finally agreed to be my mentor" she babbled, not realising that Lissa had actually stopped breathing all of a sudden "What?" Lissa and Alberta yelled, shock and anger shot through the bond at this moment. Tasha'shappy mood suddenly faltered. "What... what did I say? Have I done something wrong?" she asked, in an innocent voice, like butter wouldnt melt. Lissa walked right up to Tasha. "You know very well what you have done" she spat. Then she turned to Dimitri. "I never picked you as a man to go back on your word and break your promises. Im so disappointed in you" she spat even more, venom and hatred coming through her words. Then she slapped him across the face and left the room.
`Oh rose. Im so sorry` she thought through the bond. Ever since the strigoi attack when I had almost died- again, she had healed me- again. It had doubled the strength of the bond, she could now hear me aswell. It had been cool when we had discovered that. We could say things between us without anybody else knowing what was going on. It took alot of hard work on my part, to be able to block her off, when I needed to keep things secret from her, like the pregnancy for instance. I wanted it to be a surprise for everybody, and now... now I didnt know what I felt like. `its okay liss I'll be fine. I'll meet you in your room in five minutes, okay` I thought back. Then I stood up and dried my drenched face and walked across the yard to meet her.
As soon as I knocked I was pulled into a rib breaking hug. "I am so sorry Rose. I cant believe him" she said. Rubbing my back as I cried into her shoulder. She walked us over to the bed and held me as I sobbed. Just then Christian came into the room. "Hi sweethea-" he stopped when he saw me. "Rose. Whats the matter. Whats wrong Rose?" he asked in a worried voice. Christian is like my brother, weve become alot closer since the attack, since we fought together. He stayed quiet for a moment, as he crouched down in front of me, moving my hair that was wet with tears. "Belikovs leaving to become your aunts guardian" Lissa spat. Christian sucked in a gasp, and turned deathly pale. "Im so sorry Rose" he said.
"Christian. Can you go to Albertas office and let her know that I have Rose here with me, please" she asked, in a weak voice. "Sure" he said, he patted my shoulder and kissed Lissa's cheek before getting to his feet, and heading out of the door.
"Whats wrong Rose? I can feel... tell theres something your not telling me, what is it?". I raised my head off her shoulder and wiped my tears. "Im pregnant Liss" I told her. But the tears fell again before I could carry on. "Oh rose" she said, holding me again. I could feel her sorrow for me and her anger for dimitri through the bond. "I... Im so con- confused" I admitted. I dont know what to do. She simply held me until the sobs finally ended. I stood up, needing to stretch my legs. "I was so happy when I found about the baby, this morning. I ran all the way to the gym to tell Dimitri, I knew he would of been ecstatic. Only when I got there he was talking to Tasha" I spat her name like the filthy whore she is. "I heard them whispering about something, then she left and Dimitri told me that he was leaving to be her guardian, so that they could have children together. Can you believe it? I'd fucking laugh if it didnt hurt so much." I told her. "He wants a baby so much, he always has. Now he has one growing in me, and he's leaving" I shook my head. Lissa simply watched and listened, then she spoke.
"Does Dimitri know about the baby?. Did you tell him?" she asked. I shook my head. "No, and thats the way it stays for now. Until I at least know what I plan on doing." I told her, she nodded. "Also I need you to come to the clinic with me, if you will. I need to ask the doc some questions, Like how the fuck I am pregnant in the first place. For godsake, Its supposed to be impossible isnt it." I yelled out in frustration. Then Christian and Alberta walked through the door.
"Whats all the yelling about" Alberta. I didnt feel like going through it all again. I slumped down on the bed and sat back on the bed, resting my head against the wall and closing my eyes. `You can tell them` I thought to Lissa. I opened my eyes to see her nod slightly. I sat in my own thoughts while she told them everything.
First, closing my eyes had been a really bad idea. Whenever I did I saw gorgeous brown eyes staring back at me, and a perfect luciuos mouth smiling at me. Then, there was the baby. What should I do. Should I keep it and have a child. A harder life, a perfect reminder of what I have lost- Dimitri. Or should I have an abortion, then everything would stay as it was. I would eternally have to live with the guilt of knowing I got rid of my own baby. Could I do that. I honestly didnt know what to do the for the best. I needed to talk to the doctor.
"Rose" I heard Christian say. "Im sorry. He's a dick, he doesnt deserve you. Do you want me to talk to my aunt, get her to withdraw her offer?" he asked. I laughed. "What?, Why would she do that?, Shes wanted him for years" I yelled. "Do you really think she would give him up for me?" I asked, knowing full well that she wouldnt. "Im sorry for yelling Christian... really sorry. I know your only trying to help me" I told him as I hugged him. I needed to get out of here. I was tired, this pregnancy was already playing havoc on me. "Im going to go" I told them. "Im so tired and I need some time alone, to think. I'll see you tomorrow guys. Liss dont forget I want to go to the clinic tomorrow." she nodded and I walked towards my own room, thinking about Dimitri. I could tell him about our baby, but then again... I would feel like I was trapping him, and the only reason he would stay would be because of the baby. If I didnt tell him he would leave me to go with her. Shes not even worth mentioning by name. Either way my heart would always be broken by my whole reason for living- Dimitri Belikov.
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What do you guys think she should do. Tell him or not.
Have an abortion or not. And in the end should she end up getting back with Dimitri and forgiving him.
Let me know what you think :0)