Disclaimer: I don't own Red Band Society, never have. Sorry I forgot the disclaimer before.
A/N: This chapter is a lot longer than the first but it's getting even better as I keep writing so please keep reading.
September 17, 2014
I almost forgot that I started this journal, the only other journal I have or have ever had is the one where I keep track of what I eat. I had a reason to write today though. I thought this was any other day in life at the hospital but it's not. There's a new patient at Ocean Park, Jordi. He seems nice and appreciates my twisted sense of humor. He's Leo's roommate now and Leo doesn't care for that idea. I think that maybe I could like him but the thing is like still kind of like Leo. There is no way either of them like me though so whatever. I mean why did Leo ever like me in the first place? This whole situation makes my head spin, or maybe that's from not eating in six days. Kara seems to like the food made for me so maybe there is a chance for me to trick the nurse into letting me leave, then again all my friends are here...but my family is home. I guess family comes before friends, right? Speaking of friends, I feel bad about insulting Leo earlier. I shouldn't have made all those missing leg jokes with Jordi. I was just trying to lighten the mood and that's where my brain took me. also, my therapy appointment was so annoying today. What's the point when all I have to do is lie and say what they want to hear? Then again, no one knows I'm lying. I really don't get hungry anymore and if I told them that they would all shove food down my throat. They almost do already. Of course I miss my home an I have goals for my life so I need to get out of here eventually. I don't know of any other way than tricking them. Everyone just wants me to eat but whenever I do they see one step forward and I see fifty back. It freaks me out, I can't handle it and I'm not sure what to do yet. I'm smart though, I'll figure it out without any help from anyone. Besides my life isn't all about being cured. I have friends crushes, people I trust, people I hate, every type of relationship a normal teenager has and more. I mean, the adult most teens are closest to isn't usually there nurse like I think of Nurse Jackson to be. It still feels kind of weird to write everything I think, feel or remember but it may be helpful so I'll keep going. Maybe if I go person by person, I'll be able to understand how I feel. Leo. I still like him and at one point he liked me but not equal to the way I felt about him. He's an amazing friend, someone I can always talk to but we get at each other's throats a lot. He is always trying to fix me. Why can't he accept that I'm not not normal? Dash. He's a good friend but a bit of a weirdo and very rebellious, he likes to test his limits. There's not much else to say about him. Kara. She's an annoying stereo type cheerleader but in a way, she's kind of a friend. Also. She is probably going to help me look like I ate so her presence isn't all bad. We are all in a hospital, we all could use support so I guess trying to be friendly is the right thing to do. Jordi. He's new but I already know we could be great friends. I may not know much yet but he's mysterious and fun. Even though it wasn't on purpose, he turned my crush relationship thoughts upside down. It's going to be interesting to see how our relationship turns out. And lastly, Charlie. He may be in a coma but he is a big part of our little group. Dash, Leo and I have all poured our hearts out to him even though he can't respond. I wish he was awake and, this goes for everyone I mentioned, I hope they get better. I have my weigh-in soon, the nurses are going to flip at how "light" I am but I have more fat than I want to. I know how to make everything seem okay, if I chug water and hide weights under my clothes they'll I weigh more. As long as I wear baggy clothes-they'll never know. Until next time, journal.
A/N: Hope you liked it! Please review, there is more to come. I'm getting better at this journal thing as I go and please read my other stories :)