Chapter Two

When the heart stops beating

After Paul left I rushed up the stairs and into the school, I was going to be late for my next class. Paul had a way of lingering, how he could drive all the way here then leave and actually get back to school on time amazed me. Sometimes it seemed as if Paul did everything his own way, on his time not actual time. It was like the rules didn't apply to him, I secretly wondered if he had dropped out of school but it was a subject I never touched.

There were questions he hated to answer and I knew this, there were things he said he could not share. I had questions about lots of things in my mind but somehow I trusted that Paul's intentions were good and that was enough. These questions could be answered when he was ready to answer them and I'm sure I would understand because I loved him. The good, the bad and the ugly versions of him and that to me was what it's all about.

Just as I turned the hall I crashed into someone's ridiculously strong chest. I hit the floor from the impact then stood quickly, slightly dazed.

"I'm sorry."

"Don't be I'm not hurt and I told you not to use that word anymore remember."

"Oh yeah I'm sorry I forgot Mr. Cullen, I meant I'm not sorry- ah you know what I mean."

"Bella I'm not hurt but are you okay?"

"Yes, but you're strong man."

"I know that look I'm glad I bumped into you."

"If it's about my paper I would assume I don't need to re-write it since you gave me an A."

"I would like for you to do it over again."

"But I don't need to; I got the grade I was seeking. This is an English class not creative writing and my grammar was good you said so yourself."

"This is an English class you're right and my job is to teach you how to improve your grammar, but it's also my job to motivate you as well. It's not limited to language rules Bella; I want your imagination and your soul. I want to show you how to put truth into your work. A lesson many will not teach you, a lesson you get to choose to learn. Walk away with your A and your solitude, stay in that hidden world of yours. But I know it hurts and deep inside you want Bella to be heard because she is wonderful."

"What the fuck are you talking about?" I was surprised that I said that to him, I wondered how he provoked such hostility out of me.

"I'm not trying to provoke anger; I'm trying to provoke truth."

"Get out of my head, it's like you know what I think and feel. I know you got everyone wrapped around your little finger but not me Mr. Cullen."

"Call me Edward from this point on."

"Edward." I paused. "Look I just want to get my A and keep it at that."

"You're a hypocrite Bella."

"What?"

"You sulk because you feel that people are self-interested and you hate them for that because you think they want everyone to be what they need them to be and not who they really are. Yet when someone ask you to be Bella you push them away, you're the fraud, not everyone else. You can walk around with your arrogance and you're A, but you got to live with yourself and your fakeness; you're not who you think you are."

I felt exposed and humiliated, I was angry he felt it was warranted to confront me.

"You don't know me and your wrong to say that, I just want to be left alone."

"I don't get it Bella, what is eating you alive?"

"Since you know so much and you can get into people's heads so well with your manipulation then you figure it out."

I turned my back to him but my eyes were burning and my heart beat like crazy.

"I guess you're off to go hide under the staircase Hun?"

"What is wrong with you?" I asked intensely and he stared back at me like he was contemplating my question.

"You are so egotistical to approach me in this way, Edward."

"You are condescending Bella." He was walking towards me and I was backing away, I felt myself hit the locker and his face was now directly in front of mine. I could feel and taste his breath.

"You are so out of line sir."

"So fucking what, whatever it takes to wake you is worth it. You got more soul and heart then the majority of the students here."

I ran away from him till I could not run anymore, I found my spot and I quickly ducked under the staircase. I buried my face into my hands and cried, and then I heard someone enter so I composed myself. Hoping that this person would go away quickly but their footsteps stopped right in front of me, this was a first.

"What is going on with you and Mr. Cullen?"

"Not a damn thing I have someone." I stood now and faced Caius as his eyes burned me.

"Your eye color looks different now earlier they almost seemed reddish brown but now they seem sort of electric brown."

"Is electric brown a new shade of color or something?"

"You're sarcastic."

"Is that a bad thing to be?"

"At times, are you calm now?"

"What do you mean?" When he asked this he seemed angelic. I could not read him well his facial expressions rarely changed, he was sort of one dimensional. He leaned against the wall and I found myself staring at him, his beauty was provocative.

"You and Edward have the same essence."

"Me and Cullen are similar but very different too."

"In what ways do you differ?"

"I think he is a, how do I say this without sounding like an ass. He is a pussy and a counterfeit, somewhat of an illusionist."

"Why do you say that?"

"Edward is a wolf in sheep's clothing and he actually likes the camouflage or he has just become contempt, who knows or cares."

"So are you a rebel Caius?"

"A rebel, no people are much more complicated than that Bella. So what did you mean when you asked if I was calm?"

"I don't know earlier you seemed heated with me."

"Bella aren't you presumptuous, how do you know it wasn't the girl beside you who irritated me, hell how do you know I was annoyed at all."

"I just feel that you were and it was because of me but I don't know why because I don't know you."

"Oh Bella when the heart stops beating the soul goes too, but if that wasn't the case how I would love to become one with you."

"What are you talking about?"

Caius suddenly sprung forward and he grabbed my hips and his forehead touched mine ever so gently, I never let anyone but Paul touch me this way.

"You are one I could become infatuated with but then again I'm a moody guy and you are also one I could come to loathe."

"You are the strangest boy I have ever come in contact with, today was just bizarre." I pushed him away but he didn't put up a fight he backed away and I could not read him. Nothing he said made sense and I don't think he cared too. I walked briskly towards the door, for the first time ever I left school early on my own accord.

I headed to Emmet's house but and I opened the door with my key. Emmet was a god send and ever since I had run away he welcomed me with open arms to live with him in his house. His father had left this place to him and it was a large home, it was very elegant. Emmet lived off his inheritance and never worked; he traveled and explored different hobbies all the time.

We met back when he briefly volunteered at the nursing home my grandmother lived at before she died. Even though he was a grown man we had become friends and nothing more. I never seen him with a woman or anyone else for that matter and I never asked, I assumed if he wanted to share that part of his life he would. He was a big guy with curly brown hair, highly attractive.

When I got there I saw that he was sitting with Paul and they were talking, when I came in they went silent I felt as if I was interrupting something.

"Hey guys what's up?"

"What are you doing here so early Bella?"

"Things got a bit stuffy today in school." I said answering Emmet's question.

"Just because I agreed to let you stay here does not mean you can cut out of school."

"I know that."

"Well I'm glad you're here because there is something me and Paul needed to talk to you about."

"What?"

"Bella we care about you and we both want you to open up on your own time but."

Before Emmet could finish his sentence I ran off to my room screaming out loud like a maniac and Paul followed me.

"What the hell was that baby?" Paul sounded concerned as he grabbed hold of me.

"Everyone has been pushing me today and I just can't take it please, let's not talk about that okay; I'm not ready."

"We don't have to do anything you don't want to do all I want to do is to protect you Bella, baby. I need to know, I need for you to let me in because I could help you."

"I'm not ready to talk about that Paul."

"Then like I said we don't have to today but eventually we do because I need to revive you and resuscitate you, I got to I fucking love you now."

Paul kissed me softly and I could feel his concern, this was part of why I loved him so much, he understood me and he always gave me what I needed when I needed it and I loved that. Paul was a Bella pleaser not a people pleaser; he could care less about what others thought just what I thought. I was taken care of with him.

"You want me to hold you until you feel safe?"

"Yes but you know that could take forever right."

"Bella, you say that every time."

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