In my mind, my plan was justified. My dad would get the money for my gear and Ivy would be closer to the plants she loved so much. Dad would win, Ivy would win, and I'd get my gear. It should've been been a happy ending…but I know now that selfish goals only corrupt everything.
See, after I went home after meeting Ivy and getting my dad some coffee disks, I had a…what's the fancy word for realization again? Oh yeah, epiphany. Not the good kind.
I was in my room. Superman was all over my walls, accompanied by some of my favorite bands (recent ones and vintage) – Brittany Spears, Queen Kong, Lady Gaga, the Mafia of Krabz, Los Abuelos, The Aristocats, Eminem. All the cool people. But the Mafia of Krabz was the coolest of cool. It was their song, "The Politician", which that gave me the idea.
"Lie to people, lead them on. They'll be thankful for your little con. Everyone will win in the end, my friend."
I reasoned that I could do that. Play both sides. Tell Dad I found him a volunteer and tell Ivy that my dad needed an assistant for an experiment. Ivy would be thrilled to be spliced with a plant – she loved them more than she did people.
You know those abused kids that find a way to be happy? Ivy was one of those. She was named after one of the old 20th century beer brands – Corona. Everybody called her Ivy because of this one time that she went missing during kindergarten. We were all playing hide and seek. Everybody but Ivy was found within half an hour. We found her sleeping in some of the ivy that used to grow on the wall that surrounded the school four hours later. The teacher actually had to cut her out it was so deep. But she was so happy in the stuff – she started giggling when she woke up to the teacher trying to cut her way through.
It's a bit of a miracle that she was ever happy – both of her parents were alcoholics. The angry kind. The only reason they kept Ivy around was to give the government another reason to keep sending them money to "keep them afloat"…they were really using it to fund their multiple addictions. The only reason that Ivy had clothes that fit her was her jobs as a gardener and a tutor. Her love of plants probably kept her alive.
She hid her clothes and food in an abandoned greenhouse that was pretty close to her house. The day I started the plan, October 18th, she took me there to help me out with photosynthesis.
The greenhouse was small for a green house, about the size of a normal classroom. The light hit Ivy's short red hair on fire as her blue eyes flickered everywhere as she began her explanation, "See, plants depend on animals as much as we depend on them. They need the carbon dioxide we exhale just like we need the oxygen they exhale."
"Then why don't humans evolve into something that doesn't need oxygen?" I asked, "Why voluntarily depend on something?"
"It's a symbiosis. I can't really explain the why, but it's how Nature designed it. That's why we have to keep plants around – they help us live and always have," Ivy answered strongly, her love for flora showing, "Animal life wouldn't have evolved without plants because the Earth would have too much carbon dioxide in the atmosphere. Plants evolved first and took a lot of the carbon dioxide out of the air, which allowed animals to evolve."
"Why do you keep referring to humans as animals, Ivy? We're smarter – we have tools and emotions," I asked, hiding my disgust with curiosity. Ivy, to my annoyance, snorted as if I was saying that Riddler and Joker had been the same person.
"So do animals. Humans who think they're above animals are the ultimate hypocrites. Humans are mammals who are just at the top of the food chain. Look over our history – all of our wars have been territorial battles in one way or another. Humans are no different than the ants that they squash daily – in fact, humans and ants are the only two animals who ever wage war for long periods of time," Ivy argued strongly, again proving the obvious fact of her being a bit of a genius, "And some of the guys these days. They fight over girls like objects. We're still cavemen – only our tech and culture has changed."
"But what about girls who fight over guys?" I asked, trying in vain to gain a one up on her, "Seriously, I might as well have the whole cheerleading squad fighting over me."
"That's primal instinct of a female wanting the best mate. They see you and all your muscles and their primal instincts and media say that brawn's attractive. But girls like me – the brainy nerds, the intelligent outcasts, etc, etc. – we can control our instincts and go for the guys who will most likely succeed in these times. Not to mean to call you stupid or anything," she replied, quickly adding that last sentence.
Inwardly, I wanted to punch her. I thought that she believed that she was better than me But the thought of new gear calmed me a bit as I let an easy smile spread across my lips. "It's all cool, Ives. Hey, ya mind doin' me a another favor?"
"Depends on what it is," she answered. It was a smart answer – had she said yes, I might've been tempted to do something that she probably would not want at all. She was cautious, almost to the point of paranoia when she considered promising things to people. When I was alive, I thought it was stupid and that I, being the physically superior one, deserved to have everyone serve me and do whatever the hell I wanted. Now though…in my time of dying…I realize that she was incredibly smart to do that. But she wasn't smart enough. If she was, she would've avoided me and never talked to me. Then, we probably wouldn't be in this mess.
"My dad needs an assistant for his experiment. You want the gig?" I asked, a bogus tone of friendliness coating my words.
Ivy grinned and replied, "Hell yes. I'll volunteer."
"Hey Dad," I called into the one story house, "I found ya a volunteer for that plant splicing thing. Remember the girl who's obsessed with plants? She wants in."
A/N: I stayed up late on a school night to type this up for you all. Please review, even if it's a "OMG, this is sew kewl". If you draw fanart, send me a link to it through messaging.