Standart Disclaimer: I do not own Oregairu and i do not make money publishing this story.

Forewarning: I strongly advise you to read my earlier story "And so, Hiratsuka Shizuka" before this story if you want to understand the whole story, as this one consists of moments that were mentioned in earlier one but weren't featured as the PoV character was not present during those moments.

"I-" i heard Yukinon try to come up with an answer, a flash of pain went through me as i watched her trying to find her strength.

Once again she tried, eyes still wide and barely able to form any words as if she was trying to spill whatever was within her heart, "I-".

And i steeled my heart for the incoming pain as i was about to do what i surely thought to be extremely unfair, i turned my face towards her and formed the coldest expression i ever could.

She stole a glance at the expression i forced and looked as if she couldn't say what she wanted to say seeing that, she turned her head sideways, with the tears almost coming out, words left her lips, this time with no sign of that earlier light in her eyes. "I wouldn't mind-"

In that fleeting instant, joy overpowered the pain i was feeling for what i did, even before she could finish her words i turned my face towards Hikki expecting the words i hoped that would never come to arrive.

With his hands squeezed into fists and his gaze downwards, he answered my expectations with the words that would put a certain end to the scheme i have come up with, turning the cold expression i have forcefully adorned into a crestfallen smile.

I have tried to tangle the threads connecting us to a such state that none of us could untie the knot that it formed, but before i could make the final pull and tighten it, his words came out like a finger reaching for that opening before i could forcefully close it.

But my actions had a consequence that i have never dreamed of, as if she was awoken from a deep slumber, Yukinon chided me after reforming her bearing and came up with her own request, one that i initially could not wrap my head around.

But it didn't take long for her to enlighten me, and as i understood her aim, i realised she was finishing what Hikki could partially do, he could only get in the way of my attempt of tangling those threads eternally, but what Yukinon aimed to do was to cut them all entirely, leaving each of us with the immediate decision of what to do afterwards.

At this most important moment, i chose to contradict the kindness that was expected from me, hoping her frailty and his fears would at least let me have that lie i could be content with, but i may have actually just been running away, i may have been too naive to expect that outcome, but it is too late now... There is only one hopeless option left.

Boys were putting their usual scene, with two of them flanking Hayato-kun as they leaned on the heater while Tobecchi was standing across them making a fool of himself and stealing occasional glances at Hina-chan.

Us girls were mostly ignoring them with Yumiko and I sitting side by side on the seat while Hina-chan was sitting backwards on the desk, unlike the boys an uneasy silence was reigning among us, probably because other two could easily sense my mood.

I was stealing glances at Hikki once in a while, lately he has been typing on his phone and smiling at it during breaks, only person that i knew among the few contacts on his phone that could make him smile just by texting was Komachi-chan, and i wasn't under the impression that she would waste so much of her time texting her brother, seriously if he was texting with Komachi-chan so much it was creepy for both of them.

It was finally Yumiko who broke the silence with a worried voice. "Yui, are you like okay girl? Like you have been totally silent today."

I ignored her question as i was wondering whether i should ask my own question, when her worry started to show more prominently on her face, i thought why not, i had nothing left to lose. "Nee Yumiko, Hina-chan, do you believe love is rational?"

Yumiko looked stunned hearing me ask something like that so bluntly, Hina-chan on the other hand formed one of her rarer expressions, one that looked serious enough to show that none of her thoughts at that moment were about lewd stuff regarding what boys do with each other.

Yumiko got over her surprise after a while and answered with a fiery tone that was hidden behind the disguise of disinterest. "I don't know Yui, but like i don't really care, i like what i like and i will totally do everything i can to get it."

Hina-chan stole the words in my mind with a content smile on her face. "That is so like you Yumiko."

A tone of red appeared on Yumiko's cheeks as she started fidgeting, probably realising how much her words were filled with emotion, but i turned my serious gaze towards Hina-chan and asked. "You disagree Hina-chan?"

"I do not disagree with Yumiko's stance per se,-" She looked at my eyes with deliberate intention at this point. "-do you want me to be frank Yui?"

I replied with a dispirited tone, averting my gaze. "Hmm, lets hear it."

She took in a deep breath and continued with a forceful tone. "I think the most indispensable factor in a relationship is intellectual compatibility, it is true that sometimes people do specifically get attracted to opposites, but the lack of intellectual stimulation will ultimately lead to a degree of loneliness and dissatisfaction on the party with more developed critical thinking skills."

And frank she was...For the first time after being friends with Hina-chan for almost a year, i realised i underestimated how perceptive she was, she was this way back then with the Tobecchi's request too, i was supposed to be the one who could read the mood but i was oblivious to his feelings towards her while she was already taking her precautions.

But she was not done yet, so she asked again with the same deliberate intention. "Do you want me to carry on Yui?"

Why the hell not, already harsh truths were subtly thrown at my face, i might as well go all the way, this time i didn't avert my eyes and looked her in the eyes with a forlorn smile on my lips. "Hmm, fire away."

A look of pain passed through behind her thick framed glasses, but she looked to be steeling herself and spoke with the same forcefulness. "You see Yui, infatuation can only last for so long and this part is valid for both parties, the relationship must be sustained by something they both share in common."

She hesitated for a second and stole a glance towards the boys before continuing with a disturbed look. "That is why, there are things that are never going to work, and there are things-"

She stopped herself for a second, closed her eyes and tilted her head with a small smile forming on her lips, she looked as if she was entertaining an older thought and as if she was amused by that. "And there are things that might have probably worked spectacularly, only if they were not part of a huge lie."

The gaze i was trying to maintain started to falter as the reality of her words one by one slammed into my face, seeing my distress Yumiko interjected. "Hey Ebina, i know she asked for it but like aren't you being a little too mean."

Hina-chan ignored her words and kept staring at me with the same old intention, i grabbed her hand and Yumiko's shoulder before speaking. "It is okay Yumiko, i think this was one of the most important lessons i will ever receive in my life, if only i could receive it earlier."

If the things would happen as i expected them to happen, and no miracle would arrive to give me the thing i so very much desired, i was going to have to rely on them, so i decided to make a request. "Yumiko, Hina-chan, i think i am going to get my heart broken soon, please be there for me when that happens."

"Like i am always here for you Yui." Yumiko answered, flustered and worried.

Hina-chan looked at me with a smile adorning her face, she looked as if she were proud and contended herself with a nod.

The moment last period ended, Hikki got up from his seat and made his way out, i gave him a few minutes of head start before i parted with Yumiko and Hina-chan.

I would be fine with failure i thought, i just needed to try, i knew i was going to be a mess afterwards, i knew it was going to be awkward for a while, but it was all right as long as i got to say what i needed to say.

Before i knew it, i was i front of the clubroom, i could hear their voices coming from inside, they sounded like they were in their own world as usual.

"Stop being so cynical Hikigaya-kun, yes there might be an element of selfishness and self satisfaction in every good deed, but these are almost always down below among the list of reasons" i heard Yukinon say with a chiding voice.

Hikki replied with apparent sarcasm. "Are you sure? Are you positive that their main reason is not the fact that it eases their conscience?"

Yukinon replied with an amused tone. "Now you are just reaching so you can contradict me, i have to tell you Hikigaya-kun, not every person in this world is so wretched that they would always think 'i would feel bad if i didn't do it' every time they do a good deed, unlike you."

Hearing that banter filled me with a bittersweet nostalgia, i wondered for how long i was going to be able to witness it without feeling a throng of pain inside, i took a deep breath and prepared myself to put on my cheerful act as i slammed the door open with a usual greeting. "Yahallo!"

"Good afternoon Yuigahama-san" Yukinon gave her usual greeting with a smile adorning her lips.

"Yo." Hikki gave his usual crude one, barely lifting his head up from his book.

This everyday scene would have been enough for me i thought, but i was sure it was never going to be exactly like this from this day on, i intended to make sure of it.

I kept on with the fake smile on my face and spoke cheerfully. "You guys were at it again, at least wait for me Yukinon, you might finish him off without me to hold you back."

Yukinon put her fingers on her temple as if she were having a headache. "I can certainly try Yuigahama-san, but i can make no promises considering i can not trust my own tolerance when it comes to the infuriating nonsense that comes out of this mans mouth."

Hikki lowered his book before replying passionately himself. "Oi woman, don't get into arguments if you are going to start being rude just because you didn't like what you heard."

Before Yukinon could make a comeback i started laughing, unlike the earlier emotions i was deliberately putting on, this one was natural, i realised i genuinely enjoyed their banter, the words that came out afterwards could only be described as motherly. "Now now kids, please behave."

A pout formed on Yukinon's mouth before she returned to her reading and Hikki put on a smirk before he did the same, i had a little bit longer than an hour left with this content everyday scene before it would disappear, maybe forever...

Time passed on as usual, with me doing the most of the talking while they both raised their heads from the books they were reading to reply and occasionally going into their bantering about some random topic i came up with.

As the closing time arrived, my gaze started alternating between Yukinon and the clock, expecting her to call the day so i could go ahead and set myself at Hikki's path for what i aimed to do.

She finally raised her head from her book and i instictually made a move to get up from my seat, but before i could raise myself up, she locked eyes with Hikki, took a deep breath while closing her eyes and spoke with a determined look. "Yuigahama-san, before we call it a day, we have some news we would like to convey to you."

A feeling of dread enveloped my mind and i could feel my nails biting into my palms as the hands that started to shake tightened themselves into fists, i fought the emotions that originated from that dread and managed to look her in the eye, waiting to hear those news.

She stole a glance towards me but didn't allow that determination to leave her face. "We have talked before that club would be disbanded with the start of the new term, b-but that is no longer necessary."

No, not like this, it had barely been more than a week since that day, i could not have been too late to act, there was no way one of them would act earlier than this, please at least do not deny this to me.

Before i could gather my thoughts i heard her voice again, this time much more timid filled with occasional stutter. "B-because Hikigaya-kun and I-" She stopped for a second as her voice got lower and lower towards the end and carried on with a much more audible albeit still timid voice. "-we are dating."

I couldn't define the first feeling those words raised inside me for a while, i hoped it to be sadness, i hoped it to be anger and i even hoped it to be envy but after a long silence it hit me, that momentary feeling that passed without leaving a trace was happiness, i felt happy for them, especially Yukinon, as i knew how much she needed a shoulder to rely on.

I tried to put up a brave front and tried to form a smile as i held back the tears that were slowly forming at the sides of my eyes, i tried to come up with a cheerful voice but the one that came out was trembling. "Congratulations guys-"

I stopped myself from saying anything further, no i wasn't going to give up at this point, it was never too late to turn the feelings that i kept inside for so long into words, i wasn't going to let this determination that i built step by step go to waste, i raised myself from the seat and spoke with all that determination echoing in my voice. "Hikki, can i speak with you alone for a few minutes."

He raised from his seat without an objection and made a move to walk towards the door, but Yukinon stopped him with a motion of her hand and raised herself from her seat making her way outside without saying a word.

I fully raised myself up and moved towards him with only a few feet between us, without raising my gaze from the ground i spoke with tears starting to fall. "I was too late Hikki, but i am sure it wouldn't make a difference even if i was early enough, i knew you weren't that dense of a guy to not notice this, i knew you deliberately kept me from saying what i wanted to say so many times, but i also didn't have enough courage when you decided you wouldn't stop me from saying it."

I raised my gaze and looked at him in the eyes seeing the surprise on his face as i was still determined to say what i wanted to say all along despite being aware of them now. "That is why Hikki, i will say it even at this late moment, that I-"

I saw it as the pain flashed across his face and he tried to interrupt. "Yuigama-"

I shook my head to the sides not letting him interrupt and formed a smile. "That is why i will say, i want you to know that i love you, and you don't have to say anything."

He formed a bitter smile hearing the words i spilled out and spoke the clumsy words he could come up with. "There is nothing i could say Yuigahama, saying that i am sorry would be unfair and it would be a lie."

The fondness i felt grew even more if that was possible so i waved a hand and spoke without letting the smile leave my face before i left. "Bye bye, Hikki."

I wiped the tears as i left the clubroom and saw Yukinon waiting side by side with Yumiko at a distance they could not hear us from the inside, the moment Yukinon saw me coming out, she made a move towards me with worry on her face. "Yuigahama-san-"

I held her hands which made her stop her words that were forming, i forced the best smile i could as i squeezed her hands. "Yukinon it is okay, i still love you so very much, but i need time to think and maybe grieve so please let me be for a while."

She looked uncertain and shared a look with Yumiko, which made her act as she spoke without any malice in her tone. "It is okay girl, i got this, you better go."

I laid my head on Yumiko's shoulder and let her caress my hair as i listened to Yukinon's hesitant footsteps, i asked when i heard club door slid. "Why are you even here?"

She faked an offended tone. "I told you i was always there for you whenever you needed, Ebina said it would be wise for one of us to wait for you and i totally wasn't going to let her be the one."

A chuckle escaped from within before a more dejected feeling settled. "You are so lucky Yumiko, you have so many rivals you could hate to your hearts content, i wish i could fight the way you do with tooth and nail."

This time she faked an angry tone. "Hold your horses girl, you are totally painting me like some kind of savage, besides it is never too late to start doing what i do, i am willing to help you as much as i can, even against that stuck up ojou-sama."

I raised my head from her shoulder and looked her in the eye before i spoke. "Yeah, but do you know what was the first thing i felt when they told me?"

She looked dumbfounded and an eyebrow raised itself. "What did you feel?"

I formed a smile and tightly squeezed her shoulders as i let go of the tears once again. "I felt happy Yumiko, for an instant i felt extremely happy for her before all the sadness, anger and envy hit me."

"Yui-" she tried to reach for my head and tried to embrace me once again but i kept onto her shoulders tightly and stopped her.

Smile in my face widened into a content one as i tilted my head and asked both her and myself at the same time. "What do i do when i don't even know which one i love more..."

I managed to shake Yumiko off by saying i needed to be alone for a while and started making my way home, the same way i took with him as he pushed his bicycle on my side months ago.

A tune cought in my mind and i started to whistle it as i walked the familiar pavement as much as my hesitant legs allowed, this place was going to be where i was going to get rejected today if all went according to the plan.

I remembered the day we walked this way side by side which was much happier despite all the trouble we were in, i remembered trying to convey the my feelings and failing to come up with enough courage, but still i was sure i managed to convey them even with those clumsy and vague words, but recipient wouldn't accept anything but decisive bluntness.

I deluded myself into thinking that the words i said that day had a part in his reason to protect that place, but i internally knew he had his own reasons, i realised that there was something he wanted and i wasn't the one who could help him reach that thing.

I wanted this road to last forever that day, just like i wished that ferris wheel ride to last forever too, i loved ferris wheels, even if you were on different cabins you would end up getting off at the same spot, as long as the party that would get off early waited you could go for another ride together, but this time there was no one waiting for me when the ride was over.

I reached to the spot that we bade our farewells last time with the same tune still on my lips, just like that day i turned around bidding farewell and waving my hand as i whispered the last words of that tune to the wind.

"Hello Hello Alone..."

AN: Hello and i am sorry, i am really sorry that i had to show you a Yuigahama filled with so much sadness, but i had no other way if i didn't want to demean her feelings, it is hard getting rejected and it is even harder when you don't even get to convey your feelings, thus this was the best way for me to show her in a brighter light.

The events in this chapter takes place one day after the chapters 3-4 in the original story, so it is a little more than a week after Hikigaya and Yukinoshita start dating, i think i gave a clue about this but i didn't specify the exact day.

I want to point out that not everything Yuigahama thinks is what i myself do, i think she holds a much greater spot in Hikigaya's heart than she gives herself credit in this chapter i wrote if you guys want an example.

Another thing is, i notice most of the stories that involve Yuigahama getting her heart broken give the role of consoling her to Yukinoshita and Hikigaya, which i think is not so healthy (i was going to say ballocks here but decided to soften it, a lot :P), so i gave that role to Miura and Ebina, even then i didn't allow them to console her that much, because i think there are not many things that can be done to console a person in in that situation other than listening when asked to and leaving the person alone when demanded so, anything else most of the time turns into an attempt of trash talking.

This chapter might give the impression that i left Yuigahama in too sad of a state, but i have to say there was no way around it, it is never easy to experience what she did especially at that age and i am speaking from past experience, but she should be able to come to terms with it mainly because she found the strength and determination to convey her feelings even in that situation, that is always helpful.

I wont claim this about most of the chapter but i would like to think that what i did with Ebina was good, i always thought her to be an extremely intelligent and perceptive girl that was hiding behind a whole layer of masks, so i found it fitting that she should be the one to talk about reality of Yuigahama's situation.

Next chapter will be Haruno and i think it might take longer than this one did as i almost literally have no clue what to write about at this moment.

I would like to thank everyone for their reviews and i have to admit it put a smile on my face to receive a positive review from the most infamous person wandering around in these review sections no matter how much i would like to think i don't care about other peoples opinions.

Again i am waiting for your reviews with enthusiasm whether they be positive or negative.

Thank you for reading.

William 'Bill' Huggins