Hi everyone!
Last time I forgot to tell you that it all starts with the Corazon-case. It is all AU, obviously, since Hotch is not in love with Reid in the series (*sigh*). Nonetheless, I tried to mostly follow the events that we saw on TV, except for the last case in my story which I made up. Therefore it helps if you've seen Season 6. I noticed that I left out The Thirteenth Step though, sorry for that.
Some moments are rather Torchwood-inspired, and I guess if you know the series you'll spot them right away. ;) If you don't know it: watch it if you can, Jack/Ianto addicts don't need photoshop!
Well then, off we go again:
- HOTEL ROOM (MIAMI) -
Hotch was alone in his hotel room. He started unknotting his tie and sat on his bed. This case was a really tough one. The disturbing things he had seen and the gross photographs were haunting him. The mussels in the victim's eyes seemed to accuse him of being too stupid, to bloody dim to find their murderer. He sat on the bed, rested his forehead in his palms, and tried to think of something else.
Reid had done rather well, he thought. He hadn't worked with him all the time, but there were no complaints from Morgan, which was reassuring. He realised that he was more exhausted than ever this evening, the pressure of the seemingly unsolvable case and Spence's illness being just a bit too much for him.
He changed and went to bed, but he could not fall asleep. He couldn't stop thinking about Spencer. Hotch didn't want his friend to die, not like that. He tried to reassure himself that he might not have cancer, but he felt the fear creeping in his heart anyway.
"Why do you care for him?" Obviously, the little voice in his head was back. "Why do you care that much?" Why did it always have to ask so many silly questions?
"Of course you worry," reason told him, "he's your friend!" Yes, Aaron thought, this was true. That must be it.
"Of course you worry," the tiny voice echoed, "you're in love with him!" Hotch sighed. That ridiculous voice in his head! That was another problem he couldn't solve. The things it said were obviously not true, and yet it made him feel weird and self-conscious. He was not in love with Reid, or with anyone else.
Even as he thought that, he felt his heart beat faster at the thought of his friend and realised he was utterly wrong. Could it really be? Had the tiny voice been right all the time? He had to admit that he liked to think of Spence's smile, and how childish he sometimes was. Those 'physics magic' rockets in the office for example... Just the thought of Reid made him feel good and the thought of his eyes made his heart beat accelerate even more.
No, this isn't right!, he suddenly thought. What about Haley? This really was not fair. He loved her, too, still missed her. Developing something like love for someone else just felt wrong. If she was still here this would never have happened, he was sure of this. Is his crush on Reid just the need for something physical?, he asked himself. The tiny voice stayed silent this time. Had he really ever thought about Spencer this way? He seriously doubted that. It had been utter bliss to hold his hand, the thought of gently touching his back was still fresh in his mind; he even yearned to do it again if ever possible. Yet at the same time he involuntarily closed his eyes to memorise the moment when they had looked in each others eyes and he had felt out of time, completely lost and yet safe. That was way more than just bodily needs.
"At last you got there yourself!", whispered the voice.
He felt how he became a little sleepy and his mind started to drift off. With a little smile he thought of how nice it would be to gently stroke Reid's throat. He bit his lip as he had the notion of placing a kiss there, too. How soft the skin would feel under his lips...
No, he interrupted himself, think of Haley, how would she feel now? He shouldn't be turned on, not by someone else and certainly not by a man. And he should really sleep now or he would be exhausted tomorrow as well.