Prompt: Back in chapter 4 of GD, you hinted that Sephiroth tends to get loads of gifts from admirers and is rather inventive in his ways of disposing of them. What's the most outrageously over the top/ embarrassing gift he ever received and whose desk/apartment/lunch did it end up in?
Gifts
"Is that a stuffed head?" Zack asked as the box was opened and the tip of a beak peaked out. Sephiroth cleared aside the packing and bubble wrap to reveal the hideous taxidermy fiend.
"I believe so."
"That's a new one."
Sephiroth didn't reply, but just looked into the box bewildered. Flowers he understood, as well as sweets and cards, even small gifts meant to decorate his home or be useful in his office, but a stuffed Epiolnis' head?
"Want me to burn it?" Zack eventually asked when the silence moved past quizzical and into awkward territory. He looked rather dubiously at the head, mounted on a wood backing with holes already drilled in to be placed on a wall. Sephiroth might be an incredibly powerful killer, but he didn't mount trophies.
"No," the General said, now looking thoughtfully at his gift, leaving the card unopened on the desk deliberately.
The Epiolnis' head appeared in Rufus' office two days later, with it's beak wide open beside a now-tilted portrait of the President, so that it looked like the President was being eaten by the creature. Zack took a week to forgive Sephiroth for smuggling him into the office with a hand-drill that made him go deaf in one ear for a day, but he did appreciate how the Turks conveniently erased the security tapes. Rufus was suitably upset, especially at finding the bird had not only been welded to the wooden post, but had sixteen extra nails driven into it to make sure it wouldn't be taken down easily.