Hi Again!
Thank you to Funsoup and RunningInThePouringRain for the reviews-they were all the encouragement I needed! xx
So I decided to write another chapter, I have a brief idea where this could be going but it all depends on you guys! Please review, it helps so much!
I started writing this in my history lesson hehe :) Hope you enjoy!
(*Oh and I couldn't find out what Alex's brothers were called so I improvised, if anyone does know I will gladly be corrected! I don't own any of these characters!)
Alex was worried about Hal. She had tried to bring it up with Tom, but to voice her concerns would break his heart. I mean, just because Hal had kissed her didn't mean he was necessarily back on blood. But to allow that kind of thinking meant she would have to acknowledge her own feelings about him, and that was a door she had firmly shut after she had been dragged into this stupid mess. Being a ghost kind of put a dampener on a new relationship. Not that there was any relationship, just him being a stupid pillock and a guy about his feelings. About blood that was, not feelings about her. Unless he really did have feelings for her.
Nah, it's impossible. I annoy the hell out of him.
But that kiss was playing on a loop in her head. She sighed and walked into the kitchen, cleaning would help take her mind off things. She pushed open the kitchen door and let out an exasperated groan. Of course the kitchen would be spotless, Hal had been avoiding her for the past two days. She grabbed a mug from the cupboard and switched on the kettle. Yeah, she couldn't drink it, but the warmth comforted her. It was a reminder of home, and hangovers and her stupid idiot brothers.
She had tried several times to teach *Ben, her youngest brother, how to make a half-decent cuppa but each time they had ended up with a cup of milk or something so strong even a builder would turn it down. She let out a snort at the memory. Everyone in the family had to endure those creations for a week, no one drank tea for a good while after that. She placed the teabag in the cup and steadied it with her other hand. She missed them so much.
Maybe just a quick visit, just to check in with them.
She chided herself, check in with them? It's not like they could see her, besides what would she say, 'Hi, It's me, yeah I'm not gone, just got a bit involved with a vampire and now I'm a ghost. Surprise!' She absentmindedly poured the water into the cup. Maybe she could just go with her original plan and type a message on the computer? It would be cruel to put her brothers through that though, especially just after they had started to heal. It was too late now, she should just let them go. However should and would were very different words. She smiled. One trip, one message.
She put the kettle down and grabbed the fridge door, the handle slipped from her grasp and instead she head-butted the fridge.
Ow.
Of course it hadn't actually hurt, nothing much hurt anymore. She had just misjudged the distance to the fridge handle. Even so, she should still be able to touch it. Oh God, was she fading away? But she hadn't found her door yet! To be blasted into nothingness would be the ultimate fail, she couldn't even do death properly. She clasped her hands together in worry, one of them was slick and clammy.
Oh great, I thought being dead had some perks but no, I still sweat.
Then it all fell into place. She had accidently poured boiling water onto her hand when making the tea. It hadn't hurt at all. She slid down the kitchen wall, until she was sat on the floor. Alex let out a half cry, she couldn't see her brother's like this. She wasn't real to them anymore. Only other super naturals could see her. She was a danger to herself and those around her, she would have probably died again by now had she not already been a ghost. No way were her brothers getting mixed up in this world, it was too much for them to handle.
Silly stupid Alex, why can't you just move on?
Or was she just scared of who she would be moving on with. Tom was her friend, he would always be there for her and she was content with that, but Hal, she wanted so desperately for him to like her. He was always so polite, she knew he felt bad about her death and she hadn't really helped him with that guilt in the beginning. There was always that niggling thought in the back of her mind that their entire friendship was founded on pity. She had nowhere else to go and Hal had played a role in her death. Maybe he just wanted to make up for it. On top of that she was stuck in the clothes she wore for their date! A mean talk about constant reminders.
Or he might actually like you.
The small voice in her head was very persistent. She crossed her arms over her legs and thought it over. It would certainly explain his erratic behaviour-he just had no idea how to love someone anymore.
Whoa. Who mentioned the L word.
Her eyes widened ever so slightly. She swore if she still had a heart then it would be pounding in her chest. Her stomach fluttered as the realisation of what she had just concluded settled in. It didn't really matter if he loved her, or even remotely liked her; she wanted him. She wanted to take him in her arms and tell him everything. She wanted to be there for him, to be his rock through the cravings. She wanted to be there to tease him about his old-fashioned expressions and laugh with him at Tom's ridiculous new idea about renovations for the house. She wanted to watch him as he cleaned the bathtub repeatedly in his marigolds.
She smiled. No one else could make marigolds sexy. Alex looked up to the ceiling, that was all that separated them. She could be with him in the blink of an eye. She wanted to surprise him. She wanted to kiss him, to kiss every toned muscle on his stomach, to whisper all those things she'd never had the courage to say. She stood up, quivering slightly with excitement. She was so sure he felt this way about her too. She wanted him to feel this way about her.
She spun, a mischievous smile playing on her lips. In her haste she knocked the cup of tea from the counter. The delicate bone china fell in a graceful arch through the air then smashed on the hard, cold, kitchen floor. In a reflex reaction Alex stooped to clear it up, and knelt on the razor-sharp slivers of pottery. She expected pain but there was nothing. No ache, no dull throb, no trickle of blood from her knee. She felt nothing.
Nothing.
Would she even be able to feel a kiss? Her mind sought out the memory of his lips on her forehead. It was so brief. She couldn't remember how it felt, just the pure shock at the action. Oh silly, stupid Alex. Her eyes lost their shine. She continued clearing up the mess in silence. No thoughts. Nothing.
That's all she was. Nothing. She would never taste his kiss, never feel his breath on the back of her neck, never hear their heartbeats racing together. It was so pointless.
Hal...
Her vision blurred and her insides shook. She stifled the cry, she needed his arms around her. She needed to feel like more than just a shadow of the past. Alex let a single tear escape down her cheek. She didn't care anymore. She just needed to see him. She rent-a-ghosted upstairs.
His room was dark, she could barely make him out on the bed. She walked across the room, listening to his breathing. He murmured something but she couldn't make it out. He seemed to be having a bad dream. She came in very close, just a hair's breadth from his face.
"Oi Asshole, you awake?" she whispered softly. Her hand brushed his fringe from his face, lingering in his soft brown mop of hair. Satisfied that he wouldn't wake she leaned in and placed a single kiss on his head.
Nothing.
She stifled a cry of pain as her stomach twisted in agony. She couldn't feel it. The tears freely cascaded down her face. She sniffed slightly and wiped her nose. Alex withdrew before any of the salty droplets fell on his beautiful face. She silently crept to the door, but just before she rent-a-ghosted out she turned to face the bed again. He had rolled over in his sleep, seemingly more at peace.
With his back to her she allowed herself to say it. Just once.
"I love you."
And then she left to cry by herself somewhere he wouldn't hear.
So what do you think? Might continue if people like...maybe. :)
Thank you for reading! Review, review, review!
Blackvelvet97 xx