Kathryn left cargo bay two and headed for engineering. Now that Seven had reassured her there were no ill feelings about the away mission, Kathryn's next priority was the Doctor. She wanted B'Elanna to check his program for any lingering effects of the repeated switching between his mobile emitter and Seven's cortical node.
As Kathryn approached engineering, the door slid open and Chakotay almost walked into her.
"Excuse me, Captain. Good morning."
She noted the circles under his eyes, and the sag of his posture that he attempted to straighten. "Commander, did you get any sleep?" she asked with concern.
"A little." He evaded further conversation by stepping around her. "I'm on my way to the bridge."
"I'll be up after I speak to B'Elanna." Kathryn turned into the open door and came face-to-face with a scowling chief engineer. "Good morning, Lieutenant. Is everything all right?"
"With me, yes. What's eating him?" she asked with a nod toward the exit.
"Chakotay? What do you mean?"
B'Elanna held up a PADD. "He asked me to go back over all of the logs from the away team's shuttle, even though I have my report right here. He seemed worried about something and had an odd look on his face."
Kathryn realized that perhaps she had dropped the subject too quickly with him in the messhall. "He expressed some concerns about the mission, which I assured him I would take care of this morning."
B'Elanna looked her with a slight tilt of her head. "That's all? This was hardly the most dangerous situation this crew has been in."
"I agree, but a specific incident bothered him. I'll take that report and go over it this morning. I would like for you to run a diagnostic on the Doctor. Make sure his program is operating as it should."
B'Elanna handed over the PADD. "Yes, ma'am. I need to leave some instructions with Carey and then I'll go to sickbay." She had taken two steps away when Kathryn called her back.
"B'Elanna, about Chakotay. We were discussing Seven's report when he remembered something. He said he was thinking of the day he met you."
B'Elanna stiffened and her voice clipped, "What? Why?" Leaning closer, she hissed, "What the hell happened out there?"
Kathryn was taken aback by the engineer's vehemence. "Nothing that warrants your reaction, Lieutenant."
"It wasn't 'nothing' if it reminded him of that day, Captain."
Kathryn looked to the side and ran one hand down her jaw. "Clearly, something went on then that I don't know about, but I can guess that it was unpleasant."
"You really don't know, do you?" B'Elanna asked with surprise. "I assumed he would have told you a long time ago."
"Told me what?"
B'Elanna searched behind her for Carey and spotted him near the lift. "Lieutenant Carey, I'll be in sickbay running a diagnostic on the Doctor. When you have finished what you're doing, continue the relay tests on deck 6, section 14. We're still getting fluctuations."
After Carey acknowledged the instructions, B'Elanna quietly said, "Please, Captain, not here. I'll walk out with you."
Kathryn studied the other woman and then waved toward the exit door. "After you."
Once in the corridor, B'Elanna stopped a couple of meters from engineering and leaned against the bulkhead. "Captain, I'm not sure how you've never heard the story before. All of the former Maquis and many of the Starfleet crew know. I always assumed that Chakotay had told you how we joined his cell."
"No, I've never asked."
B'Elanna took a deep breath and glanced down at the floor. "The small cargo ship I served on was attacked by Cardassians. The captain managed to send out a distress signal before he was killed, and Chakotay answered it. When the Val Jean arrived, the fight was over, my ship was damaged beyond repair, and I was the only crew member alive."
B'Elanna raised her eyes and stared hard at Kathryn. "Chakotay and three others beamed over, and they split up to search for survivors. He found me in the cargo bay trapped underneath a Cardassian soldier intent on raping me. I was trying to fight him off, but he was big even for a Cardie. My clothes had been ripped to shreds, I was bleeding from being beaten, and I remember lying there screaming. The next thing I knew, the soldier slumped on top of me, and then Chakotay's face appeared as he picked up the Cardie and threw him across the bay."
Kathryn held a hand over her mouth, her eyes wide with shock. B'Elanna continued, "Chakotay had killed him with one phaser shot. I was terrified, but Chakotay knelt beside me and took off his coat and vest to cover me. He calmed me down, and then picked me up and carried me back to his ship. He often took a woman field medic on assignments specifically to take care of victims like me."
As Kathryn absorbed that information, she realized what it meant. "Then he'd rescued other women before you," she whispered.
"Yes, many. The Cardassians used to brag to each other about how many females they took, how many of us died underneath them and how many were left alive but broken." B'Elanna took another deep breath and pushed away from the wall. "Whatever reminded Chakotay of that day, Captain, I can promise you that it wasn't good."
Kathryn reached for B'Elanna's arm and her blue eyes softened. "Nothing like that happened, B'Elanna, but I think I understand how one thought might have led to another. I'm sorry that you had to go through that."
B'Elanna's scowl faded to compassion. "Chakotay's kind heart made that part of the Maquis missions particularly hard on him, and made him fearful for the women under his command. That's why he is so protective."
"Thank you for telling me. That can't have been easy for you."
"That experience is part of why I fought against a relationship with Tom in the beginning. I think it is also why I've never seen Chakotay make the first move when he's interested in someone. I dealt with it, though, and having Tom now makes that day seem like a bad dream. I believe I can safely say that the memory is bothering Chakotay more than me."
Kathryn's breath had caught with the insight into Chakotay's relationships, and a whole new light was cast on their six-year friendship. Before she could betray her thoughts, she stepped away from B'Elanna and straightened her stance.
"I'll try to talk to him this evening. Let me know as soon as you have the results on the Doctor's program."
"Yes, Captain." Wanting to avoid an awkward ride, B'Elanna waited until Kathryn had entered the turbolift before walking over to catch the next one.
When Kathryn arrived on the bridge, she asked Chakotay to join her in the ready room. She laid the PADD on her desk and crossed to the replicator. "Coffee or tea?"
"Coffee, please." He followed her and sat down on the couch. "What were you seeing B'Elanna about?"
Kathryn handed him a steaming mug and joined him on the sofa. "I asked her to run a diagnostic on the Doctor's program. I want to be sure nothing went wrong with all the transfers. Before that, I visited Seven. She really is fine with what happened. In fact, she has a peace offering planned for the Doctor."
"Oh?"
"Yes," Kathryn smirked, "she is taking him lunch."
Chakotay paused with his cup halfway to his lips. "She's not planning to download him again, is she?"
"No, Seven believes she has found a compromise. She's going to eat the lunch and describe it to him."
Chakotay grinned, albeit tiredly. "I wonder if the Doctor will consider that a good compromise."
"I think he'll see it as the intended gesture."
"I hope so. I would love to record that conversation."
Kathryn laughed and laid her hand on his knee. "So would I. I've been trying to imagine it since she told me. I have B'Elanna's preliminary report on the shuttle logs. I'll look it over this morning."
He drained his cup and then gently touched her hand before standing up. "I'll get back to the bridge. Thanks for the coffee."
She glanced up at him and didn't like the guarded look in his eyes. "Dinner this evening? About 1900 in my quarters."
"Sure. What should I bring?"
"Nothing, I've got it covered." She watched Chakotay stifle a yawn before he left the room, and hoped for all their sakes that the day would be a quiet one.