LENGTHY DRIVES AND STUPID PEOPLE
A Companion fic to Mashed Potatoes and Family Reunions
Parte II

Author's Note: I'm in love with my reviewers. No seriously. You guys are ten kinds of awesome! I'm glad some of you caught Reno's famous little quote from Advent Children that Naminé used during her exchange with Reno himself. LOL.

MANY THANKS TO THE FOLLOWING FOR REVIEWING: Zheyne, iluvtoady, ScuzzyToast, Geesesaymoo, Ally Montgomery, p3achy, DarkChibiBehemoth, xWhisperWolfx, Serious-Sarcasm and Miharu-tenshi. You guys have made me extremely happy. (:

V. The Talk with Demyx

I tore through the house looking for Naminé. No, not literally. But I came pretty close. And yes, I was very, very unhappy that I could not find her anywhere. She had all but vanished into thin air with a puff of smoke. My search wasn't going too well. That was when I ran smack into Demyx again, nearly spilling the cup of fruit punch he was holding in one hand all over the front of his shirt. I swear I was looking where I was going! The guy just materialised right beside me! Either he'd retained the art of using portals of darkness, or he was just really good at sneaking up on people.

Or maybe he just loved to give people heart attacks. He seemed to be trying real hard with me, anyways.

"Hey, Rox! What's the rush?"

My head whipped around distractedly and I stopped in my tracks to regard Demyx for all but zero point three seconds. "Where's Naminé?" I blurted, not wasting any more time, hoping against hope that the guitarist would know something about my sister's whereabouts. "Seen her anywhere? She said she'd be with Aunt Yuna!" There was something like panic in my voice. I needed Naminé, for crying out loud!

Demyx blinked, then gave me a smile. A smile. Couldn't he see that I was in need of my pillar of strength? My guiding star? My sister?! Couldn't he tell that I was going through some kind of goddamn mid-teenage-life crisis right now? Okay, scratch that. Maybe I wasn't. But I still needed Naminé. I didn't know why I did or what I was going to tell her. I just needed her to be there. For me. With me.

Demyx's voice brought me back to reality and so did his stupidly cheerful grin. "Whatsamatter? Lost your twin? Aw, poor wittle Roxy-poo," he cooed in what he must've thought was a soothing voice. Like that was gonna calm me down! Quite on the contrary, really. I really wanted to smack him upside the head. That would teach him to call me, what was it, Roxy-poo?

"Demyx?" I grounded out. "Do not ever call me that again."

The musician visibly winced at my tone. I must have looked murderous. "Alright. Okay. I'll remember to keep that in mind."

"Damn right you will. Where. Is. My. Sister?"

"Um, Naminé, huh? Can't say that I've seen her. She was with Auntie Yunie. But she disappeared after that. Too many people in the crowd, y'know? It's not like I keep track of her, or anyone else for that matter. I ain't no mine-detector! Or, uh, person-detector. Eh… whatever. Don't worry, you'll find her soon enough. Wait for dinner, she'll come 'round."

I glared at him for a few moments, looked around at the dozens of people milling about, returned to glare at him once more, and then sighed in defeat. "Yeah. I guess…"

"Lighten up, Rox! You seem so stressed out and tense!" Demyx said, a little too optimistically for my liking. If only he knew. "Chill out, alright? Dunno why you're in such an awful mood, but relax a little! We're all here to have fun!"

I refrained from glaring at him again. I think I've done enough glaring at people to last me a lifetime. I settled for a headshake. And I think I gave in for a little while.

"Alright," I muttered, massaging my temple with one hand (I hope my head doesn't explode anytime soon). "Fine. Wanna go sit down somewhere and catch up?" I suggested slowly. And I didn't know why I suggested that in the first place. Well, I guess I figured that maybe talking to Demyx would help me calm down, or at least help me get my thoughts sorted. Yeah. I needed them sorted. Badly. The appearance of Sora'sbestfriendAxelgoddammit had totally fucked me up and I was still trying to make sense of the whole situation.

"Yeah! I'd love to catch up with you! C'mon, let's go over there." And Demyx dragged me over to a considerably quieter corner of the house and we sat down on a couple of conveniently-placed high-backed leather chairs. Y'know, those expensive types. The Leonharts weren't cheap. I think they believed cheapskates deserved to go through all seven levels of hell. Pity, really. I knew I was a cheapo.

I let him do most of the talking. He knew I wasn't a talkative guy, so it worked in my favour. I just listened (or at least pretended to listen) while he prattled on about how the ocean was so blue, how the grass was so green, how he hated it that people at his workplace (he worked part-time at a café) always judged him by appearances, and other such nonsense. Or something like that. I wasn't really paying attention. Until he ventured into an odd topic that brought all my straying thoughts to a standstill.

"Hey. Have you ever been in love?"

I believe I blinked at him. A few times.

"What?"

That was all I could really say.

"Love," he repeated. "Cuz I think I'm head over heels with this guy I met at the café."

Oh god.

"Guy?" I echoed weakly.

"Uh-huh. Zexy's so totally awesome, y'know!? I think I'm smitten. I love him!"

"You? And Zexion?" My eyes were probably as wide as saucers. It was meant to come out as 'You found Zexion!? Ohmygodwhatthefuck?'. But it didn't come out like that. It just came out as 'You? And Zexion?'

Jesus. But I shoulda seen it coming.

Demyx looked at me funny. "I didn't tell you his actual name… wait, do you know him?" He sounded almost excited.

"Nevermind! No! I don't know him." I nearly shouted, as though I had to defend myself. It was not a lie. I didn't know Zexion. Well, okay. Maybe it was a white lie. I didn't know Zexion in this life. I knew him in another. A complete white lie.

But that's basically what I am now, right? A white liar. That was exactly what I was in this life.

Anyway, Demyx N. Aeco, my frigging step-cousin, had his own life. Nothing to do with mine. Nothing at all. At all. As much as it hurt, I didn't feel like I should barge into his life and complicate my own. I didn't want to involve myself with anything I didn't think I could handle. Especially not the love life of the former Melodious Nocturne. He was quite capable of complicating everything by himself, thankyouverymuch.

"Well, okay…" Demyx looked downcast, then suddenly brightened up again. "I think I'm gonna' try asking him out this weekend. You think he'll say yes?"

I stared at him. Then sighed inwardly. Why was he telling me all this again? Oh right, because I suggested that we should go sit somewhere to 'catch up'.

"I don't know, Dem. I really don't know," I muttered.

And actually, I did know. I knew Zexion would say yes. I knew because The Cloaked Schemer would have said yes to The Melodious Nocturne. I knew because Number VI loved Number IX. Why the hell would it be any different now in the afterlife? I frowned and mentally kicked myself for thinking such a stupid thought. Maybe it wouldn't be the case at all. Because if it were, then what about XIII and VIII?

Goddammit.

Demyx continued to speak. "Yeah, I know, I know… I guess it's kinda bold to be just asking him outright like that. Even Larxene thinks I'm being a little too straightforward."

I looked up. "Wait. Larxene?"

Demyx sighed dramatically and shook his head. "Yeah. Haven't you been listening to a word I've been saying for the past fifteen minutes? Larxene's my boss at the café. She's the mean little chick who didn't want to hire me at first because she said I looked like a wimp and stuff. And I told her rather indignantly not to judge me by my appearance and that my mohawk was not wimpy. And then she hired me, saying she liked my attitude."

"I… see."

"Yeah. Maybe I should just wait it out, y'know? With the whole asking Zexy out thing. I'll give it more time…"

Somewhere in my mind, I think something snapped. Really. Something just shattered. Cracked. Splintered. Broke into two.

"No, Demyx," I told him, voice almost flat and toneless. "Go for it. Don't wait. You never know when he might disappear from your life." Again. "Don't. Don't fucking wait it out. Waiting on something to happen is…" I looked away. "Well, you'll get tired of it."

Very tired.

I know I was.

I've finally found what I've been looking for for so long for. But was my wait really over?

Truthfully, I had no idea.

VI. The Reunion Dinner

I stuck with Demyx until dinner arrived. I've never been this close to him. Or at least I didn't think I've had any reason to be so connected to him in any way. Not since Organization XIII. In this life, I've always felt Naminé was the only person whom I could truly feel comfortable with. Because she knew and the others didn't. But maybe reconnecting with the others was a good thing. Maybe it meant we could rekindle something. If not memories, then an understanding. A new friendship. A new familiarity.

But I knew that starting all over again wasn't easy.

Dinner came around. We all (us kids) hung out at the back. That was where I finally found my sister again.

Naminé had called out to me as soon as I walked through the glass doors and stepped onto the veranda tiles. The air was mildly cold out here. Anyways, she was already seated at the table next to Kairi with a plate of food. She waved at the empty seat to her left indicating that she wanted me to sit with her. And that was exactly what I did. As if on instinct, she noticed something off right away. She was very perceptive, dear Naminé. Especially when it came to her twin brother. Me.

"You're acting very odd, Roxas. Why aren't you talking? Is something wrong?" she murmured quietly so that only I could hear her.

What? Me? Acting odd? No way. …Oh yeah, like I could actually lie to Naminé. As much as I wanted to, I also wanted to tell her everything. But I didn't know how. What was I supposed to say?!

In the end, I didn't think I needed to explain anything to her. Because a few seconds later, she caught sight of Sora and Axel coming out of the house. That was all that was needed to bring everything to light.

She only stared at me after that for a long moment, then whispered two words in a voice that sounded like her heart was breaking. I think it almost broke mine.

"Oh. Roxas…"

And she just reached out and held onto my hand all through dinner in silence.

I think it helped.

What didn't help was that I think she was trying not to cry. For me.

VII. The Gambling Den

I had managed to remain pretty far apart from Axel and Sora in general. Why? I don't know. Why don't you tell me? But they were seated on the veranda steps so it didn't matter. What did matter was that when some of the adults came out after finishing with dinner and Luxord started a gambling den on the veranda table, everyone came around to invade our space. It had only been me, Nami, Kairi, Riku, Yuffie, Vaan, Penelo, Zidane, Marlene and Garnet at the table. The others had been elsewhere eating. Now that dinner was over, a whole bunch of randoms decided that maybe a few games of poker would do us good. After all, gambling was an awesome way to like, socialise and get together as a group, right? All working towards some common goal (to cheat people of their hard-earned money) and all that jazz, right?

They were so wrong.

Not only did they totally take over our table, gambling was so not what I needed right now.

But Naminé told me to stay in my seat and just play a few rounds. So that was what I did.

Notice a trend? Everything I did, I did for Naminé. But if I told you why I did what I did, you probably wouldn't understand. She's all I actually have here in this bleak life of mine. She's the only one who gets me. She's always known what was good for me.

If she thinks I should stay. Then I'll stay.

Hey, it's not like playing a few rounds of Poker and Blackjack with the family and Axel Onér was a bad thing, right?

Right?

He sat across from me.

Axel, I mean. Directly across from me. I was seated between Naminé and Garnet. He was seated between Sora and Demyx. If you wanted to know, the entire arrangement around the table went like this: Me, Naminé, Kairi, Leon, Cloud, Reno, Luxord, Demyx, Axel, Sora, Rikku, Yuffie, Vaan, Penelo, Zidane and Garnet.

Yes. It was a big table.

Now do you understand why I didn't want to play? I told you before that I didn't like crowds. This was no exception.

All through the game, I tried not to stare at Axel too much. It's like, you know, when you haven't seen someone in ages and you want to see if that person's changed in any way, or whatever. I kept looking. Discretely of course. It wasn't like I wanted to scrutinise him too badly. I didn't want to give him the impression that I was stalking him with my eyes. He was always the one with the freakish stalking tendencies in our previous lifetime. Not me.

Oh, yeah. The irony. Did I mention I wasn't a fan?

He had pretty hands. That was what I kept thinking about whenever we were dealt a new round of cards and he held them up in a fan between his thumb and fingers. Pretty hands. Pretty fingers. Long and spindly. The same fingers that used to wield deadly pinwheels of metal and spikes, conjured by fire. What did he use to call them again?

I didn't know. Couldn't remember. My thoughts were subverted when Naminé brushed her hand over mine to get my attention. I think she did it on purpose. To get my mind away from thoughts of the past.

"What do you have?" she murmured, peering to look at my cards.

"Five and four," I whispered back.

Sucky cards for Blackjack. I know.

I got a ten for my next card. Nineteen. Good enough.

But I still lost my money that round.

I didn't care. I was still thinking about Axel. His eyes were just so green. They kept drawing me in. And his hair, his smirking face, his tattoos… He really hasn't changed. Much. Two piercings on one ear and an extra tattoo peeking out from his collarbone under his shirt (I couldn't really make out what it was but it looked vaguely like a tongue of flame – who would've guessed?). That was probably all that I could really see that was different about him.

Anyways, as the game waged on (we had switched to Poker now), Luxord (Uncle Luxord) was getting pretty miffed that Axel kept winning. Over and over again. Really, the former Gambler of Fate wasn't very amused. At all.

"Hah! Ownage!" Axel crowed triumphantly during our fifteenth game in.

"Nobody can play eight rounds of Poker straight and not lose once!" Luxord admonished. "Nobody!"

I wanted to groan at the goddamn irony in his words. Really, I did.

"Too bad, old timer! Suck it up!" Axel grinned as he swiped the whole enormous pile of poker chips from the middle of the table and added them to his already-massive heap. "I'm on one hell of a winning streak tonight!"

And he looked across to me and winked.

He actually winked.

It was a flirtatious gesture. That much I knew. Why wouldn't I know? He always did it. Always. It was a first in this life though. God, I never knew how much a person could actually miss a wink.

Okay. I admit that I had to roll my eyes at that. Reflex action. I swear. But when he looked away, I couldn't help but smile a little. The wink had reminded me so much of old times.

Naminé kept glancing back and forth between me and Axel and I was actually getting increasingly exasperated. I was finding it extremely hard to concentrate on the card game as it was. I could read the expression on her face. It was just radiating with the question, 'what are you going to do, Roxas? What now?'

What now. Yeah. What now.

I know I'm never going to say anything to him. Not about what I knew and what he didn't. I wasn't going to tell him anything, just as I've never told anything to anyone else about the past, apart from my sister. But knowing that I wouldn't be able to kind of tore at my heart. I knew that if I did say something about our past history together, I'd probably be seen as a loony.

Well… screw it. I didn't know. I didn't know what to think anymore.

I'm just glad at least the stupid redhead was showing some interest in me. Well, he should, anyway. Or I would just haaave to correct that.

VIII. The Singing

Naminé pulled me aside to a secluded corner once we were done with the gambling. I was even surprised at myself that I actually stayed for the whole game. I thought I would have just got up and left after playing a couple of rounds. But I actually stayed the whole way through. Anyways, yeah, my sis pulled me aside to chat. Our first actual conversation in private where there were no prying ears. Yes, it would've been pretty hard to eavesdrop on us, I'd be willing to bet, because they (as in Sora and my bunch of loud-mouthed cousins) started to sing. Oh gods. They just had to do this every fucking reunion. I just had to wonder why.

Anyway, back to Naminé…

"So, he doesn't know anything?" she was murmuring to me.

Well gee, like it wasn't already obvious.

"No one here knows anything," I countered, starting to get a trifle annoyed. What did I have to defend? Only the fact that it wasn't just Axel who knew nothing. It was the same with the others. Yes, I was getting annoyed. But I just knew I used anger and irritation to hide other feelings. Like disappointment. And hurt. And I think I felt a little betrayed. Even though it was the same for everyone. But I had hoped maybe, just maybe, he was gonna be different from the others when I finally found him. I had hoped maybe, just maybe, he would have remembered. I guess now that the hope I had, however fleeting, had more or less died, I just felt, I dunno, cheated. I wasn't angry at Naminé. I was angry at the world in general, I think. And life. When was life ever fair? No one here knew anything.

"No one," I echoed bitterly.

"Except us," she said, her voice small and delicate and fragile. Like a flower dying.

"I wonder why," I muttered dryly. "Maybe God hates us or something."

She sighed softly. "I know," she soothed. "It feels terrible – knowing things about other people, sharing memories with other people, and then having them not remember anything. And I know it's worse for you than it is for me. My life wasn't terribly interesting and I hardly had anyone there for me, really. But it's okay for me because over time I've gotten quite used to having people forgetting all about me. Y'know, memory-wipes and everything." She laughed sadly. "Changing memories, erasing them… Even before this life, I had to get used to the fact that I would not be remembered by others. You on the other hand… you went through so much… it's only natural that you'd feel like you've lost so much. I… I had nothing to lose to begin with. Not as much as you. Everyone just ended up forgetting who I was."

I looked up sharply and straight into her blue eyes. That was when I realised something. I realised it maybe a little too late. Too, too late. My sister. Naminé. She'd been suffering so much more than I had ever cared to acknowledge. It was always her who was there for me. She was always there for me. It was only then that I finally realised that… I wasn't always there for her.

She'd been suffering even before this life even started.

"Nam… oh fuck… oh god… Naminé…" I didn't know what to say to her. I had only just realised it. And I regret not seeing it all sooner.

She stepped back from me and gave me an intense look as if to say not now, Roxas, not now.

But I took a step forward and wrapped my arms around her. I think it was long overdue; the embrace.

We hugged all the time. But this time it was different. A lot different. Because it was me conveying something to her that I couldn't put into words. And I think she understood, because I think I felt her tremble slightly against me.

But I guess the embrace wasn't nearly enough to help. Not nearly enough to help erase the fact that I'd been so ignorant of her own pain and suffering. Too little, too late. Too little, too late.

"I'm sorry… I'm so sorry, Naminé."

"Roxas. Please. Please. Don't. Just let it go. I told you," she pulled away from me and there was a small, vacant and glassy smile on her face that hid her sorrow, "I'm fine with it. I'm okay."

I frowned at her, because I knew it was a lie. I always knew when she was lying, just as she always knew when I was lying.

"Okay, Roxas. You're right. I'm not okay," she conceded quietly with a sigh when my frown deepened. "But I will be, alright? I promise."

"Promise?"

"I promise," she repeated.

I didn't believe her. But I let it go for now.

"Anyway," she continued, "right now, I'm more worried about you. What… what will you do now?"

"What will I do now? You mean about Axel?"

"Yes."

I looked at her for a few moments. She looked intently back at me, like she wanted to know what my next plan of action was. I really didn't have one. Well, I did. But it pained me to say it. It really did. So I looked away from her gaze. Avoided it completely.

"I'll let him go. I guess…"

It was all I could do. At least that was what I told myself.

My sister was silent at that. She was just quiet. Still. Unmoving.

She just didn't say anything for awhile. The noise of Sora's singing engulfed us entirely. From the corner of my eye, I spotted my brunet cousin, wedged in between Kairi (wholovedhimlovedhimlovedhim) and Riku (whomhelovedhelovedheloved). I caught a glimpse of Demyx, crooning and strumming his guitar (thatwasmeantobeasitarsitarsitar).

And still, my sister was silent.

Then…

"You can't let him go, Roxas."

"Why not?"

"Because you love him."

And I saw red hair. I saw green eyes. I saw him. He was looking at me.

And there was a tightness in my chest.

Because I had loved him. I had.

And in this life, I think I still did.

Author's Note: One more chapter to go, guys. The chapter with the good part. ;)

It may be posted a little late because I'm snowed under university work and assignments. The sad thing about that is the fact that my birthday's this Sunday. And I'll be stuck studying my butt off. In the immortal words of Hayner: "DOESN'T THAT JUST TICK YOU OFF?!" D:

Reviews are nice. Especially constructive ones that detail what you like/dislike so far. What were your favourite/not-so-favourite parts? Et cetera. :)