Lost (Part 2)
I woke up, startled, bolting upright into a sitting position. I didn't remember falling asleep, just laying on my bed. I turned to Ben, but then remembered that he was no longer here, that I was all alone. I pulled my knees up to my chest, wrapped my arms around my legs, rested my head on my knees, and let the tears flow. There was no point in bottling it up when no one was around to hide it from.
I tortured myself by thinking of how he saved me from going into a foster home, how he raised me as his own child, how he watched me grow up while he never aged a day, our first kiss, all of our kisses. And then something occurred to me, if all this time had passed, and he had no problems before, why was being around humans such an issue now?
I grabbed my phone and called him, desperate to hear his voice…but he didn't answer so I left him a voicemail telling him to call me when he got a chance. I curled into a ball and layed there with tears streaming down my face as I stared at the phone.
I woke up to buzzing, it was my phone, Ben was calling. "Hey" my voice sounded hoarse so I cleared my throat.
"Hi, you called?" he didn't sound very happy that I had.
"Yea, I was thinking, you never had a problem around humans before, why is it so difficult for you now?" I asked.
"The reason I'm having so much trouble now is because I drank from you" he paused for a moment.
"When? I don't remember that before last night" I said when he didn't speak.
"Of course you don't remember, I made you forget. But I couldn't keep erasing the memory from you every time I did it, so I stopped. That's when I decided it was time to leave" he explained.
"Why did you erase it?" I asked.
"I was ashamed, and I didn't do it intentionally. My instincts took over and I tried to fight it but-" I cut him off.
"You couldn't" I sighed.
"I'm sorry" I wanted to be with him so badly, to wrap my arms around him, to kiss him.
"It's ok, everything's gonna be ok" I needed him to believe it even though I wasn't sure if I did.
"I love you" he said after a minute.
"I love you too" I could feel the tears building up again and I sniffed.
"Are you crying?" he asked.
"No" I lied, clearing my throat.
"Yes you are" his voice didn't come from the phone at my ear, it came from behind me. I turned around and saw him standing there. I stared at him for a minute, not believing he was actually there, then got up and went to him. He pulled me into his arms, wrapping them around me as he kissed me. I knew what I wanted, and he was going to give it to me. I couldn't stand for him to leave again.
"Turn me" I mumbled into his chest.
"Alex…" it was not going to be easy to get him to say yes.
"Please, I don't want you to leave. If you turn me, you won't have to worry about controlling yourself around me. Please" I was practically begging. He didn't say anything for a long time. "Please say something" I whispered.
"No" he said.
"No you won't do it or no you won't say something?" I questioned.
"No I won't do it" my face fell. "I won't do this to you, I hate what I am. And I don't want you to struggle through what I've gone through" he explained.
"I don't care what I have to go through, as long as I can be with you" he started to protest. "Did you ever think about the fact that one day I'm going to be old and die? And you'll still be 18?" I accused, catching him off guard.
"No, I hadn't thought of that" he admitted.
"Please Ben, I don't care what I have to go through, I just want you" I pleaded.
"Ok" he gave in after a minute.
"Really?" I looked up at him in surprise.
"Yes, are you ready?" he asked.
"Yes" I nodded. He bit his wrist and fed it to me, the last thing I heard was the sound that my neck made when he snapped it.