The silence in the car during the drive home was killing Iruka; he had to break the silence. So he did.
"Did you tell him, Naruto?"
A faint "yeah" was heard from the back seat. A glance in the rear view mirror showed the two boys sitting quietly in the back seat their hands next to each other and finger just barely intertwined.
"Why?" Gaara's rough voice was uncharacteristically gentle, almost shy.
Naruto shifted "Because the adoption agency is watching us to see if we have a 'suitable home'. He snorted "Pffft after the orphanage they dumped me in I didn't think they cared.
Naruto's reference to the orphanage made everyone tense and Gaara grasp Naruto's hand.
"They say that because Iruka is a single parent and only receives a teacher salary he might not be able to keep me. They say that he doesn't discipline me or make me study and that he doesn't feed me right because of all the ramen I eat." Naruto looked away out the window. "But it's my fault because I'm the one that misbehaves regardless of the consequences and I'm the one that wants ramen all the time and even though Iruka makes me study I still get bad grades, because I'm stupid. " He beat his head against his knees. "Stupid! Worthless! Naruto!"
Three things happened in quick succession: Gaara yanked Naruto over to him and Iruka swerved and parked the car on the side of the road and whipped around to face him.
"You are NOT stupid, Naruto. You are not worthless! And regardless of what Child Services says we are going to be a family one way or another. The people at Child Services are insanely strict Naruto; I don't want to EVER hear you blame yourself. Do you understand?"
Naruto nodded slowly against Gaara's chest. "Good. I know how you get after you have those nightmares but neither Gaara nor I will stand for any self destructive behavior. We love you too much." He suddenly smiled. "Now let's go home!" Naruto nodded and sat up this time buckling himself in unless Iruka decided to swerve again.
Self destructive behavior; the words sent shivers down his spine; fearful shivers. At the age of thirteen Gaara had had his first encounter with quote in quote self destructive behavior.
Naruto had been the one doing the self destructing. Gaara's emotions had been stifled by the abuse he had suffered, but Naruto's were out of control.
He got caught up in the memory. He had never been so scared in his life. Iruka had told him in school that Naruto was sick and he was going to have a meeting after school. Gaara walked to Naruto's house to visit him. The house had been eerily quiet and dark. He had called out to Naruto. No answer. He gently opened the door to Naruto's room and saw him asleep covers completely over his head. He shut the door quietly and took a seat at the end of the bed. Naruto eventually woke of the feeling of being watched.
"Gaara is that you?" He nodded. Naruto lifted his palms to his eyes and rubbed the sleep out. Gaara's facial muscles twitched. Something looked different about Naruto, about his arms.
"NYA! GAARA!" Naruto suddenly glomped him. "I'm so happy you came to see me!" His panda eyed friend pried his arms from around his neck. Long red scabs raced along Naruto's forearms.
"Ne, Gaara what are you-! AKK!" He grabbed his arms away from Gaara remembering the cuts for the first time.
"It's not what it looks like! Uh- It's not what-" Gaara's fists were clenched and his head was bent and voice angry. "Why?" Then he sniffed and choked on his next sentence. "Why do you want to leave me!?"
"What!? Who said I wanted to leave you!?"
"Why else would you practice killing yourself if you didn't want to die and LEAVE ME!?"
"No, Gaara, it isn't like that at all! I was venting my anger."
"By abusing yourself? What kind of foolish idea is that!?" Gaara glared and pulled Naruto in to his lap. "I won't stand for anyone abusing you, Naruto, and certainly not for abusing yourself."
While Gaara was in his little flash back they had arrived home and by home I mean Naruto's house. Gaara however was there so often if felt more like home than his father's house. Iruka had unlocked the door and they were heading inside. Naruto looked at him from the door way with a fond smile.
"Common, Gaara, you have to help me with my geometry study guide!" He smiled brighter when Gaara grabbed his messenger bag and joined him by the door. Gaara pierced him with a sharp look but in its harshness Naruto saw fear.
"Don't you leave me." He said. To most people he would have sounded angry but Naruto knew better than to think that. He knew that particular tone meant fear.
He took Gaara's hand and led him upstairs to his room. Gaara was glaring indiscriminately at nothing in particular in the room. Naruto took his back pack off and tossed it to the floor he then carefully pulled off Gaara's messenger bag.
"Homework can wait a while, ne?" He smiled reassuringly and guided Gaara to lay down head in his lap on the bed. He began to rub soothing circles on the red head's temples.
"You've been thinking too hard again haven't you?" Gaara's glare softened but not enough for Naruto's liking.
"Gaara, tell me what has you so worked up. You were fine not too long ago." From his vantage point Gaara tried to follow Naruto's arm's with his eyes. He could just barely see the thin white scars left from that day two years ago. He shuddered internally.
Without Naruto I could not live. How many times had that thought, that fact, crossed his mind? Naruto smiled as Gaara's glare dissipated he was opening up to him.
"Please, Naru, please don't leave me."
Naruto pulled him up to a position where he could hug Gaara.
"Never, Gaara, I made a promise." He wrapped his pinky around Gaara's the way he had when they were little. "We will never be apart.
Please reveiw!