A/N: Here it is: chapter number two. And now, I have some people to thank. Thanks especially to -x-Bashli-x- for suggesting Hush as a villain I can use, I did some research and he's perfect for what I need! Many, many hugs and thanks for pointing him out. Thanks to Amanda Saitou and Kyubi-female for taking the time to review, I love you for it! Thanks to TamarackPines for sticking with this fic, and to SaJi for keeping me honest and pointing out a few errors. :)

SLASH: Don't like, don't read

Anyway, here it is: the next chapter of Bats/Joker. Read, Review, and Enjoy!

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"The wages of sin is death but so is the salary of virtue, and at least the evil get to go home early on Fridays."

~ Terry Pratchett

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Bruce groaned again and banged his forehead onto the desk. He was supposed to be getting a start on the ever-increasing pile of paperwork, but all he could think about was the events of last night. Knocking his head felt so good that he did it again, and again. At least now he had a physical headache to match the mental one.

Why the Joker? Out of all the people in Gotham, why did it have to be the Joker? And why did he have to know who Bruce really was? And come to that, why didn't the freaking clown just kill him when he had the chance? Now that his rival knew Batman's secret identity, Bruce couldn't stop looking over his shoulder, checking to see if he was being followed. He knew it was pointless, knew that if the Joker really was after him he wouldn't know it until too late, but he couldn't help feeling paranoid. It was drilled into him.

And for that matter, what exactly had happened last night? Was he going crazy, or was the Joker flirting with him? Or was the clown just playing with him, like a cat toying with a neurotic and paranoid mouse? He groaned again and went back to banging his head. This was going to keep running through his head all day…

"I keep tellin' ya, you should never start with the head, darlin'," a purring voice behind him informed the aggravated businessman. Bruce turned around, at once apprehensive and irritated, frustration written all over his face. The Joker grinned at him.

"What the hell are you doing here?" he asked the Joker. No point in mincing words; his head was pounding and he was fed up with the mind games. It was a mark of how disjointed his mind was at the moment that the Joker had come in without Bruce hearing him, which was itself a major problem. Good thing the clown didn't seem too keen on killing him immediately. Still, he reminded himself, that could change at any second.

Have to keep control, Bruce. Focus.

"Why so serious, Brucey?" the Clown Prince asked him, carefully drawing a switchblade from his vest pocket. "You should try having some…" he licked his red-smeared lips, "…fun."

"What are you doing here?" Bruce repeated. He was sick of games; he just wanted a straight answer for once, was that really too much to ask?

"I thought you could use some company," the Joker informed him lightly, slipping off the file cabinet he had been perched on. "Ya must get lonely, stuck in this rattrap all day, so I thought I would drop by and, ah, say hello."

"What the hell do you want?" Bruce asked flatly. The Joker pouted, an expression of mock hurt stealing over his face.

"Why Brucey, I thought we were doing so well," he sulked. "We were making some real… ah… progress last night."

Bruce stiffened. That was it then. The Joker was definitely flirting with him. Which he probably could have dealt with, if he hadn't been torn between the desire to either throw the demented clown out a window, his one rule be damned, or, insanely, flirt back and see what happened.

"Arggggghhhhhhhhhh," he growled, going back to banging his head on the desk. The Joker looked amused.

"I can't imagine how that helps, but as long as it makes ya feel better…" he smirked. Bruce threw him an annoyed glare.

"So where do we go from here?" he asked, pointedly ignoring the Joker and checking his desk drawers. Finding a weapon of some sort would be nice, but at the moment he would settle for Aspirin.

"Weeeellllllllllll, that's up to you now, isn't it?" the Joker drawled from behind him. Giving up the search for drugs and weapons, Bruce slammed the drawer shut and turned to face him.

"And what's that supposed to mean?" he asked quietly, his hands unconsciously balling into fists. The Joker smirked again, his Chesire grin twisting up the sides of his face. He knew he could be the most aggravating person on the planet, but even so, it was always nice to have it confirmed. Good to know he was getting under Batsy's skin.

"Simple, really," he purred, resuming playing with his knife. "We both know by now how I feel. You're the, ah…variable, as the case may be. I've made my intentions clear. Now it's your turn. Quid pro quo, no?" He smiled.

Bruce was very tempted just to walk out of the office entirely. The Joker had just come straight out and told him that he was interested, and was now waiting for Bruce to tell him whether he felt the same way. How the hell could he answer when he didn't know that himself? It was the Joker. The most wanted man in Gotham! A psychotic villain who had killed dozens, if not hundreds of people! Even thinking about discussing feelings with him was beyond insane.

At the same time, his words had a ring of truth to them. There was some kind of connection between them, a connection that went beyond simply villain and hero. As much as he hated to admit it, Bruce was drawn to him.

The Joker watched him. Indecision was written all over his face. He could just imagine the internal dialogue, Batsy arguing with himself, trying both to justify it and to talk himself out of it. It would have been extraordinarily amusing, if he hadn't been so impatient to hear the Batman's answer. Why couldn't he make up his mind, dammit, they both knew they were drawn to each other; what was so hard about that?

A long, tense moment later, Bruce exhaled and turned back to the clown. "I don't know," he said simply.

"Are ya sure?" the Joker purred, drawing closer. Before Bruce knew what was happening, the Joker was embracing him from behind, with his head nuzzled deep into the hollow of Bruce's neck. And damn…it felt great.

Jesus, he was tense, the Joker noticed. No wonder Batman was always so uptight. He'd have to work on fixing that.

"Are you sure you don't know?" the Joker repeated, layering kisses up his neck and jaw line. It took all of Bruce's concentration to keep from groaning. It had been weeks since he'd had this kind of contact with anyone, and it felt so good…

"Well?" the Joker purred again, his breath hot on the distracted billionaire's ear.

Bruce's blood was pounding in his ears, and a burning wave of heat coursed through his body. He was extraordinarily aware of the Joker's arms draped across his chest, the man's breath on his ear, his own ragged breathing and pounding heart.

"Let me think about it," he mumbled. All he could think to do was buy some time away from the Joker's intoxicating presence, some time to consider things with a clear head…

"Oh, don't be like that," the Joker murmured, snuggling closer. "We both know ya want it." Stupid, gorgeous, tempting Batsy, stop playing hard to get. The time for games is over. How do you know I'll want to keep playing, won't leave for a new game?

"Please…" He was almost begging now. "Let me think about it."

The Joker growled low in his throat and seemed about to say something when someone knocked at the door. He instantly tensed, and growled into Bruce's ear, "Make sure ya do think about it this time."

An instant later, he had vanished.

The door opened, and Lucius Fox stepped in.

"Mr. Wayne, I thought this might interest you…"

His voice trailed off as he caught sight of his employer, standing as though dazed in the middle of the office, the collar of his shirt lopsided and hair slightly mussed.

"Mr. Wayne?"

Seeming to snap out of it, Bruce groaned and buried his head in his hands.

"I'm going to take the day off," he said finally, voice slightly muffled. "I can't think straight."

"All right," Fox told him, noting how unsettled he seemed. "This'll wait. You look like you need one." A moment later, he had stepped out, leaving Bruce alone with his very confused thoughts.

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"One of the points about distractions is that everything that they do is destabilizing."

~Bruce Sterling

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