If anyone sees me, I will die of embarrassment. I walked the hallways, holding the Janitor's hand so we would seem more like a 'couple.' But the hand holding wasn't the worst part, I was just hoping no one would recognize me. There wasn't much chance of that, since I was wearing a blouse, skirt, heels and a long red-haired wig. Damn water bra! Why do women even wear these things, they itch like crazy! For right now, I decided to keep my head low, not talk to anyone, and hope that the turtleneck covered my adam's apple. That was the plan anyway, until the Janitor marched me over to the nurses station to talk to Elliot. Oh no… I tried to move my head so the wig hair covered my face.

"Hey Janitor!" she said, "Who's your friend?"

No one, absolutely no one…

"This is my fiancé, Fiona." Fiancé Fiona, subtle. Watch Shrek much?

"Hi Fiona," she said. When I didn't answer right away she gave the Janitor a look. "Is she hiding from me?"

"No! She's just a little shy." He said, glaring at me. Great, now I had to talk.

Could this get any worse?

"More like she doesn't speak English, eh mop jockey?" Said a familiar voice from behind me. Oh no, I forgot the principle rule, never ask what could get worse, because then it would. The Janitor turned to face Dr. Cox, and I was silently wondering how to get out of this mess.

(I suddenly evaporate and drift off over the hospital and out to sea.)

"If only…" I whispered. Which was a bad idea, because that's when Elliot recognized either the head tilt or my voice.

"J-" I jumped on her and covered her mouth with my hand. She was staring at me wide eyed, along with everyone near enough to see.

"Bathroom!" I said in a high-pitched voice, then dragged Elliot away from anyone who could possibly know me, and into a supply closet.

"She's a keeper!" I heard Dr. Cox say from outside, probably followed by a scowl from the Janitor before they both walked off in different directions. I looked at Elliot and finally took my hand away from her mouth. Another bad idea.

"OhmygodJDyou'reacrossdresser,andgoingoutwiththejanitor,Ican'tbelieveit-" Then her voice got so high pitched that I didn't have the vaguest idea what she was saying.

"Elliot! Breathe!" I yelled, and she took a long deep breath. Then in a quieter voice, "I'm not a cross dresser, I'm not going out with the Janitor, and I can't explain it to you if you don't shut up!" She must've wanted to know bad, because she didn't say anything else. "Okay, the Janitor is blackmailing me into pretending to be his girlfriend so he can impress some girl that he likes who works here. Please help me!"

"JD, you look like my cousin Harriet."

"Thank you, that's very helpful." She gave me her serious look.

"What is he blackmailing you with?" she asked.

"If I wanted people to know that, then it wouldn't be blackmail, now would it?"

"Exactly," she said, "If you tell people, then he can't control you with it."

"I've been having sex dreams about Dr Cox." I blurted. Elliot didn't look as surprised as I thought she would.

"Well you should probably tell him, since the worst thing he could do is make fun of you, and he does that anyway." Or he could KILL me!! Elliot's beeper went off.

"Gotta go," she said, leaving me alone in the supply closet. She was right though, I should tell Dr Cox, or the Janitor would use this against me for the rest of my life. I searched the closet for a pair of scrubs and found green ones. I left my girl's clothes in there, and since I hadn't brought anything else, walked out barefoot.

Wow, these floors are freezing! I wrapped my arms around me to warm up a bit. When people started staring , I realized how much I must look like a mental patient.

"You!" said someone from behind me, a spun to see the Janitor.

"Me!" I said, then realized quickly that it wasn't as cool out loud as it was in my head.

"We had a deal. But it's off now. I'm telling him." I tried not to look too much like a dear caught in headlights, but Carla doesn't call me Bambi for nothing.

"Fine! Do it! In fact I'll tell him for you!" I said, trying to fake him out. It looked like he wasn't buying it. "Dr Cox! DR COX!!" I walked up to the nearest patients room and looked in, like he would be in there.

He was.

"What Newbie?!" Okay, now that he was actually here, maybe telling him wasn't a great idea…

"I, uh, I need to talk to you…" Damn! I be confident JD!

"Well Carol, I think it can wait-"

"No, I need to talk to you NOW!" Maybe not that confident. Dr. Cox glared at me in that way that made me want to cover at his feet and scream 'I'm not worthy!' It turned me on so much.

"Sure, Eugenia! I have sick patients to take care of for the next five hours or so, then a son and ex-wife to go home to, but I can just drop all of that so you can tell me something important. So go on, tell me!" He dropped the chart he was holding, flicked his nose with his thumb, and crossed his arms. I gulped.

"I guess it can wait…" I said, sheepishly.

"Oh no, Jenna, it can't," he replied. By now we had attracted a small crowd of people who were pretending not to watch us.

"Maybe somewhere more private…"

"No, If you can make such a big deal about it in the hallway, I thing you can tell me in the hallway." He glared at me expectantly, and the Janitor stood next to me with a huge grin on his face, both of them preventing me from chickening out. I took a deep, calming breath and walked up to Dr. Cox.

"I like you." I said in a very very small voice. That threw him a little.

"What Janice, I didn't quite hear ya there." And he leaned in, as if to hear me better. After that… Well I think it was a combination of stress, lack of sleep and his face being a lot closer to mine then it usually is.

I kissed him.

It was just a peck, but it was on the lips, and my eyes closed.

"Oh no." I said, then did what any sane person would do after seeing his expression.

I ran for my life.

Reveiws make me happy :)