Enma finds Tsuna crumpled under the tree in the Sawadas' backyard, laying face down with his body twisted uncomfortably. His clothes are splattered with dirt and blood, and his hair is tangled with twigs and leaves.

"Tsuna?" Enma asks, heart racing but movements slow. He's giving his body time to wake up from all this, hoping it's a dream. "Can you hear me...? Are you... okay?"

For ten solid seconds, Tsuna doesn't reply, and Enma's breathing becomes haggard.

And then he lifts his head, face not giving away any indication he might be in pain, his eyes scanning the area before looking up at Enma.

"Where are the kids?" he whispers urgently to Enma, trying to keep his voice and head low.

"Are they hurt too?" Enma's head starts whipping around, looking for any tiny bodies strewn about.

"Hurt?" Tsuna furrows his eyebrows before a lightbulb goes off in his head. "Oh. Oh! No! Don't worry, Enma, this is fake blood. I'm not hurt or anything."

Enma squints at Tsuna's body. Sure enough, though there's blood and dirt on his clothes, there aren't any rips in his clothes or visible injuries marking his skin. He lets out a shaky sigh of relief before giving Tsuna an irritated look. "Pranks like that aren't funny, Tsuna."

"Sorry, sorry, but it's not a prank. I'm playing house with the kids."

"Playing house?" Enma asks, cocking an eyebrow.

"They have a very unique play style." Tsuna says with a shrug. "Today they're playing as a family of detectives. I'm supposed to be the victim and key witness. I just fell out of an airplane without a parachute and I have no idea how I survived."

The sound of shuffling from the other side of the yard makes Tsuna go limp, his nose smooshing against the dirt as his head drops to the ground.

Fuuta, Fran, Lambo, and I-Pin rush out of the bushes towards the scene of the crime. They're wearing matching deerstalker caps and baggy inverness capes, each of them in a different color.

Fuuta is the first to get to the body, so they check Tsuna's pulse. "He's still alive. Rodrick, get medical assistance."

Lambo immediately rushes back into the bushes. As Fuuta has I-Pin (Elmera in-game) help them check Tsuna's wounds, Fran focuses his sharp gaze on Enma, passing the body by to interrogate him. "Who are you? Are you familiar with this man?"

"I'm Joseph." Enma answers reactively, lying about his identity now instinct after being raised around the mafia. He sees Tsuna give him a quick thumbs up and decides to play along. "I am. I'm his... lover."

Fran's eyes narrow. "For a man to see his lover in this condition and be so calm... One might question the health of their relationship."

Enma blinks before dropping to the ground and crawling over to Tsuna, loud sobs wracking his body. "Oh, my love! Who could have done this?" he wails, throwing himself down on the ground beside Tsuna.

Fuuta, who's still kneeling close by, puts a hand on his shoulder and leans in towards his ear. "Don't over-act, Enma-nii." they whisper, before snapping back into character as Lambo arrives with the medical team (a couple Build-A-Bears dressed in scrubs).

"Sheesh." Enma mutters to Tsuna as Fuuta walks away to discuss the victim's condition. "They take this seriously, don't they?"

"Oh, you have no idea." Tsuna replies quietly before the 'paramedics' move him onto the sled that's supposed to represent a stretcher.

i got a request on my new request tumblr (basedkhr) that inspired me to write a short sequel/second chapter to this one-shot. almost forgot to share this on ff, but here it is! if you liked the story please comment, i really appreciate each one, and check out my tumblr if youre interested in requesting fics or hcs.