Sayaka's POV, after school

...

I didn't go to school today, I didn't even return home last night, I just looked for some Witches or Familiars to throw myself into battle again, that's all I'm good for, after all... I didn't find any, but someone has to search them, now that Mami-san is gone. I can't leave the people of this city to their demise, so what if the Familiars don't drop Grief Seeds!? What's their problem, if they didn't make a contract they'd be at the mercy of those creatures!

Today is the day, huh? Hitomi will steal Kamijou-kun away from me now, yet she called herself my friend just yesterday, it's so unfair... I was the one who always visited him, she just saw him again when he was able to return to school, because of my stupid wish...

I hide behind a pillar and watch them as they walk and talk by the riverside, past a small waterfall, on a bench, it looks so romantic... It should be me, walking there next to him, talking to him, confessing to him; but it's Hitomi! They seem to get along so well, both of them don't care about me at all! Why!? I bet they didn't even notice I was missing today! I almost want to jump out there and cut them to...!

What am I even thinking?! I should really be ashamed of myself, Mami-san would never want someone like me to be her ally, if I think like that I can't be a hero of justice... That's right, I shouldn't even care about Kamijou-kun and Hitomi, he isn't worth it if he's just as superficial as her... So why?! Why do I feel like crying?! I can't be a hero if I'm this weak, crying just because of this...

'Who cares about all that crap anyways...? Love, justice... You know, Kyouko was right, if you want your Kamijou-kun all to yourself you should just go out there and kill Hitomi, afterwards you can break him and make him yours...' That's not... That's not true at all, I'd never do something like that, I could never...! It's just useless, everything. Love, justice, friendship; I'd be better off without any of those...

It hurts so much, but it's true, I should just throw all of that away, if I fight with hatred and give in to that impulse of destruction I'm strong, I can kill Familiars and even Witches that way. It'd probably even be enough for those two... We shouldn't fight against each other, but they are enemies of humanity, I can't allow that...! I feel so heavy, this anger is all that's keeping me above the deep and dark waters, without it I'd just drown... I have to find something to...!

...

"HRAAAA!" I finally found some, I put all my force into my attacks and cut through them, they almost look like humans... I scream as I slash them, but it doesn't bring me the satisfaction it did before, it feels so pointless... They don't even manage to hit back, they're all destroyed already... It was too easy, they were too small; but still, I'm struggling for air... I undo my transformation, it's already this late... Wait, someone's coming... her!

"Why don't you understand? We wouldn't have time for this, even under normal circumstances. Hunt only Witches." I kind of wonder what it would be like to cut through human flesh, or much rather the flesh of another Magical Girl... Would it be any different from the Witch I cut down? Would their blood also splash all over the place...? It's so difficult not to try it, but I can't just do that, can I? I'd be no better than they are...

"Gee, thanks a ton for that advise." It's useless either way, all we can do is destroy Witches and Familiars, it doesn't matter whether we use a Grief Seed or not, it doesn't change anything in the long run... If we die Kyubey will just fool some other girls into becoming Magical Girl and everything starts over again, regardless of what we do... I don't really care, all I have left to do is to die, then I can be happy and won't have to worry about anything any more.

"Your Soul Gem is at its limit. If you don't cleanse it..." If I don't cleanse it I'll probably just die, then I won't have to worry about anything any longer, I'd just be dead and that would be that. "Use this, please..." Oh, did she just stoop low enough to ask properly? This must be really important if she'd go that far, haha... She throws a Grief Seed to my feet, but I don't care about these things, I simply kick it with my heel, off into the darkness behind me.

"What are you plotting now?" I don't know what exactly it was, but something about those words seemed to hit home with her. It looked so satisfying, seeing her 'perfect' mask crumble away like that, even if it was for just a moment...

"Grow up. This is no time to be suspicious. Do you hate being saved that much?" If I accepted their help or anything else from them I'd be no better than them, the Grief Seeds they have are tainted with the blood of the ones who were consumed by the Familiars who grew to be Witches because of them. If I accepted something like that I could just as well run around and kill innocent bystanders, it'd be no different from what they indirectly do...

"I'm going to be a different Magical Girl than you lot. I'm sure of it. I hate people who'd just use and abandon someone. I need no reward. I'll never use magic for my own benefit!" That's right, I didn't use my wish, my soul, because I wanted Kamijou-kun to notice me; I did it because it was the right thing to do! That won't ever change, no matter what kind of a person he is, it doesn't matter if he won't look at me...

"You're dying." Haha, as if I didn't feel it already, every breath of air I inhale is more difficult than the last one; every movement drains me of what little energy I've left... I'm drowning, but I don't mind at all.

"Once I'm dead that means I don't have to kill any more Witches. I'll finally have completed my task. I'm okay with that." I can't even stay on my own feet any longer, I fall on my knees right in front of her... "I can't even beat a Witch! I have no reason to exist!" That's right, I only managed to kill two Witches during my whole time as a Magical Girl and I didn't even manage to kill that last one on my own. I'm a complete failure, at everything...

"So why are you doing this? I just want to help you. Why won't you believe me?"

"I'm not sure. I think it's just intuition. I can tell you're a liar." I look up at her again, this time with a darker look than before. I won't let her deceive me, no matter what. I won't be used by anyone any more..."You always look like you've given up on everything. You're always speaking empty words. And right now, you say you're doing this for my sake, but I bet you're really after something completely different. Don't think you can fool me."

"Don't you know how much you're hurting Madoka?" Of course I know how much I'd hurt her, that's one of the reasons why I didn't come back to school or back home, I want to die like this, all alone... If a witch does it they'll never even find my body, no one will have to worry about me at all. Isn't that the best fate us Magical Girl can hope for either way? Mami-san didn't have it bad at all, it was a quick and painless death, is it so much to ask for the same...?

"Madoka? She has nothing to do with this." I convulse my hand a little bit, somewhere I know that it isn't that easy for me; in a way I can almost envy Mami-san now for not having anyone to leave behind except for Madoka and myself. They didn't even notice she was missing until almost a week had passed... My parents would probably even come home for something this big and they'd be just as worried as Madoka. Though Kamijou-kun and Hitomi probably wouldn't even come to my funeral if my body was found, somehow...

"No... everything revolves around her." What does she mean by that...? Maybe she is just like Kyubey, after the potential Madoka seems to have... I can't allow that! She changes into her Magical Girl uniform... "You're sharp. In fact, you're exactly correct. I don't want to help you. I simply don't want Madoka to have to watch your fall. If you refuse my aid, only death awaits you. If you hurt Madoka any more... I'll kill you myself right now, Miki Sayaka." Her Soul Gem is dazzling me with its light...

"Do it. If it's better for Madoka, for everyone..." That's all I can manage, I take out my Soul Gem and offer it to her, it would be for the best if I just died here either way. I have nothing left, Kamijou-kun doesn't care about me and I hurt Madoka too much already... It'd be better if this would end now, I wouldn't have to worry about anything any more, I could just rest... Somehow I believe her this time, she is honest about Madoka, so I have nothing to worry about. She can take care of her once I am no more...

"That's... I will... I'll really shoot you, I won't hesitate!" She makes a gun appear out of her shield, I just hold my Soul Gem out to her... Why is her hand shaking? Wasn't she just saying she wouldn't hesitate...? I can hear steps further down the hall... A civilian? Not around this time... I'm suddenly knocked back by something, I don't even feel it, I just realise it as my field of view changes... Before me is Akemi Homura, on the ground, someone tied her up...

"Quick! Run away!" That red hair, is that... Kyouko? It really is, that thing holding the transfer student in place is her strange spear... I don't really understand why, but my body obeys her to its best ability. I slowly get up and move away, though even my movements rather remind me of a zombie from those movies now; it's more of a stumbling than running, it would almost be a miracle if I won't fall down soon...

...

Kyouko's POV

...

"What's wrong with you!? You were supposed to be saving her!" Not to mention what has to be wrong with Sayaka right now, if Homura didn't hesitate for some reason she'd be dead now... Why did she have to reject that Grief Seed!?

"Let me go." This is definitely somewhat amusing...

"Oh, I get it. If I've got a grip on you, you can't use that technique of yours." That sound again... A grenade!? I quickly jump back as she pulls the trigger, just after that she vanishes and the grenade explodes... I'm thrown to the ground by the force of the explosion, but I guess that was lucky, under the circumstances. It was a flash grenade, so I was lucky that I didn't look at it, but I've lost Homura and Sayaka... I stomp on the ground in frustration. "Damn it!"

There's no helping it, I'll just have to search her by foot, I just hope Homura didn't go after her... I can still sense some traces of her Soul Gem; if this feeling is anything to go by she's almost overflowing with negative energy, this isn't good at all... At least I can follow that, though my instincts are basically screaming 'fight-or-flight'... Hmpf, screw them, I'm going after her, I'll get her back, this time for sure, not like that other timeline...

...

Sayaka's POV, on the train

...

I guess I got away from the transfer student, I somehow made it to this train. Though I don't know why I even bothered, it would've probably been better if I just let her do it; it's not as if I had enough fight left in me to even finish off a Familiar, not to mention a Witch... Why did Kyouko even try to make me run away, it's not as if she got anything out of it... Well, who cares? It's just Kyouko, after all, I couldn't care less, isn't that right...?

"Gimme a fuckin' break! She already blew all the cash I gave her! Dumb bitches don't know how to hold onto money, I tell ya." And those two idiots, just my luck, of all the people that could've been here it has to be two pigs like them...

"Women may as well not even be human. They're like dogs or something. They get excited like a goddamn puppy. But all you need to do to shut 'em up is give 'em a good smacking. Slacken the leash a little bit and they're all over the damn couch. Can't let 'em get too comfortable. What, you think a bar slut like you is gonna be doing that well ten years from now? Know your fuckin' place, right?"

Those people... I fight to protect worthless trash like them as well...? It would be better if a Witch got them, they'd deserve something like that... Or maybe I should do the world a favour and do it myself... What little magic I have left would still be more than enough for them. I should paint this place with their blood, maybe that would bring me the relief I hoped to get from fighting those Familiars... I get up and walk towards them, slowly...

"Man, you're good at dumping them when they end up more trouble than what they're worth. I need to learn your tricks." I have enough of them, I just want to shut them up... or maybe have them scream out with a fraction of the pain I feel...

"Tell me more about her." These two... if they're even close to as bad as they seem, wouldn't it be better to kill them right here...?

"What?"

"About the woman you're talking about. I want to hear more about her." There should be laws against the very existence of scumbags like this. It would be so easy to just reach out and break their weak little necks, to wring the life out of them, to slice them into pieces...!

"Hey, babe, you're too young to be out this late." Doesn't he even realise how much he has to be hurting her!? Maybe he really doesn't know it, doesn't understand it, just as Kamijou-kun doesn't understand my feelings...

"She cares about you. She works hard to make you happy. You understand that, don't you? But you treat her like a dog. You don't even thank her. When she does something you don't like, you dump her." This is the world... I was protecting until now. this world, where everything is so wrong; this world, where people like them don't just exist, they thrive; this world, where one of my friends steals Kamijou-kun from me, just like that...

"What, you know her or somethin'?" I want them to understand, but if that's not possible I will... I will...!

"No..." The brakes, I'll be getting off at the next station, otherwise...

"Is this world worth protecting? What have I been fighting for? Tell me! Tell me right away! Otherwise..." I can feel the darkness all around me, it's enveloping me, it's making me stronger! With this strength, it would be so easy, so damn easy to just crush them! They're stuttering in front of me, like frightened little pigs when the butcher comes by... it would be so easy to let go of these few things keeping me from doing that, so very easy...

"W-what the hell!? What's goin' on here, man!? H-help me!" I grab him by the throat with my right hand and push him against the wall, I can't even see him any more, it's all so grey and dark... his so-called 'friend', I guess, is cowering away from me, there's nothing that could save him now... I slowly lift him up, into the air, he's making gurgling noises and struggling, but I don't even feel his kicks, they don't affect me at all... I materialise a sword and push it against his chest...

"You will go back to that woman and apologise, do you understand me? I asked you a question... DO YOU UNDERSTAND ME!?" My voice sounds so strange, but it seems to work... His eyes widen and he nods frantically; I could just push the sword into his chest and he'd never do something like that again... No, this isn't me! Damn it, what am I even doing!? I throw the man away and put my sword away, this isn't something I can do... "If I ever hear you talking like this again... I won't hesitate...!"

They're both cowering away from me now, as if I was some kind of a monster... Maybe that's not even too far from the truth, what I almost did right now... Mami-san would be ashamed for that, and Madoka, my family, Kamijou-kun... I push back against the darkness this time, I push it away from me, but it's still lingering all around me... That hissing sound... the doors open, I stumble out of the wagon while the frightened men stay.

The train departs again, I almost did something I would never be able to undo back there... I get to the closest bank and let my body slump into it, standing is too much of a hassle at this point. My body is barely responding to my orders now, it's so hard to even breathe in air... I should rest for a little bit, it shouldn't be much longer now. I won't live much longer, I have nothing to keep me alive, absolutely no reason...

...

"I finally found ya..." ... Kyouko...? I can't even tell how long I've been sitting here, I don't feel much better... She takes a seat next to me and takes out something, presumably something to eat. "How long are you gonna keep blowing off your friends?" Sounds like potato crisps or something like that... and what 'friends' is she even talking about...? There was only Madoka, I don't have any other friends any more... Wait, she probably isn't my friend any more, after what I told her, so...

"Sorry to bother you." I didn't want anyone to be here with me, I just wanted to be all alone and die already, but I guess that won't be happening... well, it's not as if it would be bad for Kyouko to see this, I'll just die, it shouldn't concern her.

"What's wrong? You're not acting like yourself." I don't even know what it is, but to be honest...

"I just don't care any more. What do I even care about any more? Who do I want to protect? I don't even know any more." What was even so important that I thought I'd have to protect it, so important that I sacrificed my very soul to accomplish it...? I don't even know any more...

"Hey..." I finally find enough strength in myself to move again, I take out my Soul Gem... It's almost black now, it shouldn't last much longer. Kyouko looks pretty surprised, but I knew that it would probably looks like this; it looks like the depths of the sea, where almost no light reaches... Soon it will be deep enough for no light to reach there at all, in my soul... She takes out a Grief Seed and holds it out to me, but I just push her hand away with what little strength I have left. It rolls off, somewhere into the darkness...

"The balance of hope and despair is always zero. You said so yourself. I understand what you meant now. I've saved plenty of people." I take it a little bit closer to my face and stare into it, it almost looks as if something was moving in it, calling for me... 'Maybe it would've been better if you didn't save those people from the Witch, then Hitomi wouldn't have...' "But in exchange, resentment and pain took root in my heart. I'm even hurting my dearest friend now."

"Sayaka! Are you-!?" She sounds genuinely worried now, but it's just too late already... My last chance to save myself, I threw it away just now. But I don't regret doing that, it's for the best, no matter how I look at it, I should die here...

"As much as I wished for the happiness of one... Someone else must be equally cursed. That's how the story of a Magical Girl goes..." I can't even hold in my tears any longer, they just flow down. Right in front of Kyouko, of all people... I didn't curse Hitomi for my misery, I took it all upon myself... I do my best to offer her one last smile, in spite of my tears. If I have to die anyways I want it to be like this, with a smile... "I've been... such a fool."

...

Homura's POV, some minutes ago, at the fountain

...

I made it just in time again, like last time. Madoka was just about to make a contract with Kyubey to save Miki Sayaka, but that would be Madoka's downfall and it didn't save Miki-san either, in the long run... I shouldn't have hesitated back then, I should have pulled the trigger and helped her out of her misery, she even asked for it... But I didn't, it would've been the first time I'd kill someone, I'm just not ready... yet. If this isn't the last timeline I have to go through I will probably end up doing that as well, especially if it's her.

Miki-san... I can't say we ever got along very well, not in any of the timelines I've been through so far, every time she became a Magical Girl something went terribly wrong, she always ended up turning into a Witch... Even if it isn't really her fault, her stupid ideals can't do anything but lead her to such an end; those values don't work for us. I take out a gun and shoot it, this way Madoka can't make a contract.

It is for the best, Miki Sayaka cannot be saved, no matter what I did. Keeping her alive only makes matters worse for me, she will probably just convince Madoka that she should make some stupid wish; if that did happen this timeline is over and I will have to restart everything. It shouldn't take much longer, she will soon turn into a Witch... but this time I won't agree to help Kyouko with her insane plans. I would destroy that Witch, but Kyouko doesn't take it very well and either attacks me or turns to a Witch herself if I kill that Witch... I let time resume and the bullets pierce it.

"W-what...?" Madoka looks rather scared, but even so, I had to do it. I don't want Madoka to think badly of me, but there is no way around that, if I want to save her I have no other choice... That's right, I will do anything, just to save her. If that means I'll have to face Walpurgisnacht with Kyouko or on my own, so be it. Tomoe Mami already died of her own folly, she is another one of those persons I just can't seem to get along with... "That's just too cruel... Why did you do this!?"

"Madoka..." It's so hard to keep this up, to stay strong in front of Madoka. I don't care about the others that much any more, I lost any faith I had in them in all those different timelines... Tomoe Mami, she went mad with the revelation of our eventual fate and killed Sakura Kyouko and tried to kill me as well, but Madoka stopped her... Miki Sayaka, she either became a Witch or caused other problems... and Sakura Kyouko, she always went down with Miki-san. I think we have some things in common, always trying to save that one person, always failing...

"Why!?" It's almost time, soon Miki Sayaka will become a Witch, as she already did so often... I have to keep Madoka here, I can't allow her to witness that horrific sight. It's almost heartbreaking to see her last moments, even for someone like me. She tries to stay strong and rejects any help until her very last moment and I do feel sorry for her... but I accept that, it's impossible to prevent because she won't let others help her and once she transforms there's no return.

"It... was necessary. Don't worry about it, another one will arrive here soon." Of course Madoka doesn't understand it yet. It doesn't matter how many of them I kill, there are always more. They aren't sentient, they are the same as mass-produced robots. Incubator... I wonder what exactly they are, Kyubey is just a messenger... but there is no way of knowing that, they hide their secrets very well. But what should I do about Madoka...?

"W-what are you even talking about? You killed him!" She sobs a little bit as she does her best to look away from the corpse of it. She is too good for her own good... that's why she always suffers in the end, because she makes some stupid wish for someone else... It doesn't make much of a difference whether it's a wish for oneself or someone else, they are always likely to turn into nightmares and our eventual fate is all the same. "What about... Sayaka-chan?"

"You should give up on her, Sakura Kyouko is trying to save her, but you shouldn't get your hopes up; that would be in vain." So far I have witnessed no timeline where she succeeded and I repeated this month more times than I can even keep track of... sometimes someone remembers a little fragment from a different timeline, though I don't know why that is, but it rarely changes anything and even if it does that's rarely for the better...

"But Sayaka-chan is my best friend! I can't just give up on her like that, I can't!" I have to admit that I feel a certain envy towards Miki-san as well, she is the closest friend of Madoka. If I act as I do I can't ever hope to get close to Madoka again... but if that is what it takes to save her I will do it. Even if I have to push her away from me, she might even end up hating me. But as long as Madoka makes it through this I don't care what happens to me or anyone else...

"I know that very well, but please believe me, I'm not saying this to hurt you..." I know that it does hurt her, but maybe she will understand it this time and not wish Miki-san back... I much rather wouldn't have to deal with her any more, to be honest, she would probably just set Madoka and Kyouko up against me, if she could. She might seem to be an idiot and that might be true for the most part, but she can be surprisingly resourceful when it comes to dragging others down with her...

"I... I don't want to believe you, Sayaka-chan can't be...!" *Sigh* That notion is understandable, they were friends for many years now. But it won't do her any good to believe in Miki-san any longer, it won't bring her back and only a Grief Seed could save her now, but she won't take it... I tried forcing her to use one once, that didn't work. I never understood why or how, but she rejected the one I offered to her somehow and turned to a Witch immediately...

"Madoka... Please, trust me, just this once, don't make a contract with Kyubey!" If only she didn't make a contract, I'd 'just' have to worry about Walpurgisnacht, if I can convince Kyouko to aid me we could probably defeat it this time. It didn't work in the earlier timelines, but I'm not that weak any more. I can fight now and Kyouko would be my first choice as a partner, Mami never lasted long in that fight, Madoka isn't an option and Miki-san never makes it that far...

"I can't, not if you're saying that Sayaka-chan will..." Her reactions so far... I will probably have to reset this timeline as well, though I'm not willing to give up just yet. Not until there really is nothing that can be done about it. Miki-san... She really is a problem, I can't tell how she does it, but I can't seem to fool her... I don't know what it is with her, but she can tell when I lie, no matter what kind of an act I put up...

"Madoka... I will go and try to rescue her, if that is what you want me to. However, if I fail I want you to accept her fate and you won't wish her back, can you accept that?" I can still try it, though it's most likely too late already. I can sense the cursed air she had about herself even here, a Witch born from such curses is truly a terrifying opponent... I only remember beating it with the help of Mami, Kyouko and Madoka, had they not weakened it first...

"I... that's..." And there was that time when Kyouko sacrificed herself to destroy it, but I shouldn't let that happen. I will need her if I want to stand a chance against Walpurgisnacht... Miki Sayaka truly is much more of a problem than I thought at first, she ruined a lot of timelines all on her own..."I will accept... but only if you do everything in your power to save her, alright? If you promise that I'll accept..."

"Very well, I will do whatever I can do to save her, though I would still advise against getting your hopes up." Maybe this timeline isn't lost just yet, after all... Of course I'm not referring to Miki-san, but if Madoka keeps her promise I might be able to save her! Though I also shouldn't get my hopes up; no Magical Girl should, that only serves to make us succumb to despair even sooner... I have to be patient if I want to save Madoka. No matter how many times, I can always turn time back...

"H-Homura-chan, wait..." I turn around and look at her once more, she looks strangely... relieved? This isn't the way things would usually be, she would run after Miki-san or cry here, but this reaction is something I haven't seen yet. There are a lot of strange things in this timeline, that could be a good sign... or a sign of an impending catastrophe. "Regardless of what will happen next, I want to thank you..."

"If you want to thank me do so by not making a contract with Kyubey, that's all I ask for. You should go home." It is a little bit bothersome that most timelines are quite different from the others, otherwise I could learn about the reactions of the others and act accordingly, but their behaviour changes ever so slightly with every new timeline... sometimes they seem exactly the same like one of the others to a certain point, like this one, but what will happen next...

I can't quite tell. Things could go as they did last time, if they do I will have to think of a way to prevent Kyouko from sacrificing herself, she is the last Magical Girl in the vicinity... It would all be much easier if Miki-san had accepted the Grief Seed; but she never did use one when it was necessary, not even once... I can't tell why that is, but she seems to reject them completely. Considering their true nature that would probably be very ethical, but ethics aren't something we can affort and she shouldn't know that to begin with.

It is surprising that Miki Sayaka hasn't become a Witch already, it was always around this time... Could it be that Kyouko somehow convinced her, that she made her use a Grief Seed...? If that was to be true I will have to consider this timeline 'irregular', it deviates from the 'regular' timelines too much, though there hasn't been one of those which had a favourable outcome for me these timelines are still my best bet to reach my desired goa-

W-what was that?! I could feel a tremendous amount of energy just now, it almost felt like a shockwave passing through here... I have never felt anything like this, it reminds me a little bit of the timelines when Madoka became a Magical Girl, but it isn't the quite same. I can't really tell how it's different, but it is... it came from the same direction where Miki-san went off to, I need to hurry... What did those idiots do!? If they both turned into Witches I can forget about this timeline, but I really can't place that feeling...

...

Kyouko's POV, at the station

...

"I finally found ya..." Finding her wasn't really the difficult part though, I could probably even get a vague feeling of this negative energy from the other end of the city... The only reason it took me so long was because I had to follow her by foot, since she was using a train it took a while to catch up to her. She doesn't even look up from her seat, her beautiful blue hair is completely hiding her eyes. I'm glad I arrived here in time... I take the seat next to her and take out some crisps. "How long are you gonna keep blowing off your friends?"

"Sorry to bother you." I eat one of them, but I'm really worried now; this didn't sound good at all, it sounds wrong, something like that coming from Sayaka. Where did all that fight she had in herself go? She'd have a sharp reply for me any other day, but right now she sounds just as a hero would if he was defeated; if all of his dreams were lying shattered in front of him... it really hurts me to see her like this, she used to be so bright...

"What's wrong? You're not acting like yourself." Seriously, it's almost as if someone had replaced her with a doll or something... The Sayaka I know would be swinging her sword around with 'righteous fury' and go on and on with a grand speech about heroism and justice or something like that. Well, that could be a little bit exaggerated, but I'd still feel much more comfortable if she did something like that, she's kinda creeping me out right now...

"I just don't care any more. What do I even care about any more? Who do I want to protect? I don't even know any more." Damn it, she seems to be doing worse than I thought... She never once doubted her wish, no matter how many times I told her how stupid that was; she always went ahead and defended it, not once did she doubt that... It reminds me a lot of how I used to be after it had happened...

"Hey..." I almost want to reach out for her, but that would probably just agitate her even further. She opens her hands and reveals what she was hiding there, that thing... Is that her Soul Gem?! It looks exactly as it did in my dream, it's almost black! Holy cow, I knew that this might happen eventually, but this soon!? I should've recognised this scene, it looks exactly as it did in that dream... I quickly take out a Grief Seed and offer it to her, but she weakly pushes my hand aside. It rolls off and disappears in a drain, I consider following it, but there's no time...!

"The balance of hope and despair is always zero. You said so yourself. I understand what you meant now. I've saved plenty of people." Damn it, I was the one who had to tell her that... I didn't know she'd take it this way, I should be more careful with her in the future, if she even has one... But now that the Grief Seed is gone, what should I do?! "But in exchange, resentment and pain took root in my heart. I'm even hurting my dearest friend now."

"Sayaka! Are you-!?" Why does she have to be so resigned to her damn fate!? I should've told her what would happen earlier, but I didn't realise she was this far already, I thought I'd have more time... I just got here, I didn't have a chance to talk to her before because Homura was trying to kill her, despite what we agreed on earlier. I have to think of something, fast, if I don't come up with some kind of plan...

"As much as I wished for the happiness of one... Someone else must be equally cursed. That's how the story of a Magical Girl goes..." She's smiling and crying at the same time now, she's frickin' serious about this crap! Think, Kyouko, think! Let's see, I need a Grief Seed, but I have none and can't get that one back in time... A Soul Gem turns into a Grief Seed, when tainted enough... No time to think this through, I'll try it! "I've been... such a fool."

I snatch her Soul Gem out of her hand, she doesn't even resist any more. It's the centre of all these negative energies around here, but I need to try it... If a Soul Gem can turn into a Grief Seed it might just be able to substitute as a Grief Seed as well. I have no idea what might happen if I do this, but I push her Soul Gem against my own. That's the only thing I could come up with, it seems logical enough, right...? As I push them together a dazzling light shines, it's almost blinding me, and...

"AAARRGH! FUUUUCK!" DAMMIT! This frickin' hurts! It feels as if I was set on fire, my whole body hurts so much right now! Is this what she went through this whole time!? I press our Soul Gems together even stronger, I can't let go now... it feels as if every part of my body was either cut, bruised, set on fire or had a broken bone underneath; though they don't really appear I can still feel them, so many different kinds of pain at once...! I have to stay strong, I have to...!

"Stop it, just leave me alone!" It seems as if it did something, Sayaka is moving again, she even gets up... I barely see it because of the tears in my eyes, this pain is really something else... Damn it, I've never felt this horrible, if it gets any worse I'll collapse on the spot... After some more seconds the pain finally subsides slightly, though I feel completely exhausted... "Why did you do that...? I wanted to die here, I was supposed to die here..."

"You know what...? Maybe you're right, maybe I should've left you alone, maybe I should've killed you the day when I first met you!" W-what's... what am I saying...? I suddenly feel so angry, I just want to grab her and...! What's going on here!? Why am I thinking something like that...? I shouldn't do that, I should... "You know, now that I think 'bout it, it's not too late to fix that just yet, is it?"

"What are you talking about? Why did you try to help me in the first place if that's what you think...?" She looks confused and hurt, but as I change into my battle gear she follows suit. I put our Soul Gems into one of my pockets, though they feel kind of strange... and materialise my spear, she already has her sword in hand. If I don't get my act together soon this will all have been in vain... But this anger! I just want to... 'I want to pierce her with my spear, I want to rip her apart with my bare hands! Maybe that'd ease this pain as well...'

"Alright, let's get this started!" I rush forward with my spear, but she blocks it without too much trouble, she's gotten better at this... but why isn't she fighting back...? I throw her one blow upon the other, but she just evades my attacks and parries some others, she isn't even taking me serious...! You just wait, I'll show ya! I let my spear split into many different pieces connected by a long chain, it coils around her, I've got her... I need to stop, but... with my magic I push the tip of the spear through her stomach from behind.

"Gah... Kyouko... why...?" She's still moving!? She's coming closer, despite my spear being pierced through her abdomen and the other parts coiling around her, what is she!? Her sword falls to the ground with a loud *clang* and both it and her outfit vanish... She stops just in front of me and falls to her knees... she lifts her head to look into my eyes, those beautiful blue orbs, she looks so... I don't know why, but my anger feels as if it was dissipating, leaving a sensation of emptiness and despair in its stead... my hands fall to my sides, my armour and my spear vanish, releasing her... what have I...?

"Sayaka... I didn't... I didn't mean to... I'm so sorry!" I feel the tears rising to my eyes yet again as I throw my arms around her back and hold her as close to me as I can, but that won't make this alright again. It's just the same as back then, I try to make everything right and end up destroying what's most important to me... WHY!? I bury my face in her shoulder, she has such a nice smell... I can still feel the pain of my body, but it's negligible in comparison... "I'm so sorry, so goddamn sorry! SAYAKA!"

"It was probably... the same for you. It's... alright, it doesn't... even hurt... any more." She lifts her left arm and pushes me away with very little force; I feel a little bit dejected, but what else should I expect? I ain't some goddamn prince or knight with a white horse and shining armour and Sayaka isn't my princess... still, I need to do something about this, there has to be something... "What's... wrong? You're not acting... like..." She closes her eyes and her hand falls onto her stomach, she looks so peaceful, this isn't good... I gently put her down, my hands are dyed red with her...

"Dammit, I'm sorry, Sayaka...!" This... I have to... there has to be something I can... Grief Seed...! That has to be the reason why I felt so angry, this has to mean it worked, it's the taint... I need a Grief Seed, quick... there's a pool of blood forming below Sayaka, I need that damn Grief Seed! Where did that stupid thing roll off to!? The drain! I stumble a little bit as I walk towards it, I try to push it open with all my strength, my body still hurts horribly...

Finally, I managed to push the manhole cover away; it's pretty dark in there, but I spot the Grief Seed immediately, it glistens slightly... at least it didn't roll away any further, I reach inside and take it out. I was so stupid, letting my anger take over like this. Please, don't let me fail again! I hurry back to Sayaka, she's just lying there, with her eyes closed... wait, what happened to that wound I inflicted on her...? I'm sure that happened, the blood is still there, so how can this be...? She's in her school uniform again, but it doesn't look dirty at all...

Whatever, I don't care. I need to use that stupid Grief Seed, right now! Where is her Soul Gem!? I go through her pockets, but there's just her wallet and other useless stuff... Wait, I'm such an idiot, I took it with me. I reach inside the pocket where I put our Soul Gems, but there's definitely something wrong... there's only one Soul Gem, don't tell me I lost one, that would be bad... I take it out, it's heavier than mine... might be Sayaka's, works for me. Though I'll need a fix as well, considering what I used mine for...

I put the Grief Seed next to the Soul Gem in my hand, it's way too dark to see what colour it used to have before... and there's the taint, it looks like black smoke as it leaves the Soul Gem and moves to the Grief Seed. After a moment the colour becomes clear again I can see red above the vanishing taint, so it has to be mine... I guess I'll have to look for hers, should be enough for both of us. Wait... as the taint continues to vanish there's another colour as well, what's going on here...?

Well, at least I don't feel so angry any more. I guess I was right, that was because of the taint... The red colour of my Soul Gem stays above, but further down, around the middle, I can see how that colour is somehow changing; there's a very small line of violet and below that it's still black... Just what the hell's goin' on here!? Did I break it by trying to use it as a Grief Seed or what...?

Whatever, I'll take a closer look at that later, for now I need to find Sayaka's Soul Gem. Where could it have gone...? I take a look at Sayaka, she seems to be doing okay, considering the circumstances. At least she's breathing this time... I go through her pockets once more, her heartbeat is steady and she feels warm, but there's nothing useful... right now it looks as if she was just sleeping peacefully... though the other side of her uniform is probably ruined because of all that blood on the ground, but that's not really important. She's alive, that's all that matters to me.

At least she's gotten a little bit better, when I got here her breathing was like that of a fish out of water... but it's all good now, I don't know how I did it, but I somehow did it. If nothing else there's not a gigantic mermaid knight in heavy armour throwing around with strange wheels, I think that's a pretty good sign. I'm not sure if it's over just yet, but I should have time for a quick breather for the time being, as soon as I find her Soul Gem...

"Sakura Kyouko... what is the meaning of this?" Or not... Huh, I already figured Homura would stop by sooner or later, though I'm glad she didn't come sooner... Whatever I've done, I think it worked out somehow, though I still feel a little bit strange... the exhaustion and the pain from before are gone now. I guess that was the accumulated pain and the negative emotions Sayaka suppressed all that time, how did she manage to do that? Those few seconds of it were like hell...

"I ain't got a clue, maybe you can tell me 'bout it? I was kinda out of options because Sayaka made me drop the Grief Seed I had with me, so I went ahead and tried to use my Soul Gem as a replacement, looks like it worked." Somehow I feel great right now, as if I could take on Walpurgisnacht on my own; though that'd probably be a rather silly idea... still, I feel stronger than ever, was that Grief Seed special in some way? It was the one Sayaka gave me, kinda...

"May I take a look at your Soul Gems?" She looks somewhat surprised and actually kind of curious, I guess she didn't expect this to happen. She told me how it went in some of those different timelines and I don't think she was joking about that stuff; as unbelievable as it sounds it makes sense, she was always in the right spot at the right time, though things didn't really go as she described them this time, I guess...

"Well, I only have one. But sure, look all you want." Of course I wouldn't hand it over, but I hold it out to her. Looks as if the Grief Seed is replete with the taint now, I'll have to give it to Kyubey sometime. I take a look at the Soul Gem in my hand and let out a surprised noise, just like Homura... the upper half is still as red as it used to be, but the lower half... What the heck is that supposed to mean?! It's a bright blue, almost turquoise, that's not how it's supposed to look... How is this possible? Just what happened...?

"I don't understand this at all, how is that possible...?" Huh, just when I was thinking about him. I thought he'd show up, he was somewhat interested in what would come of this, otherwise he wouldn't have mentioned what was going on with Sayaka... maybe he can explain this somehow, I don't have a clue about this... though it doesn't really sound like he could... "What transpired here...?"

"I would like to ask you that very same question, Incubator..." That's Kyubey's 'real' name', according to Homura.. He actually looks a little bit confused about that as well, if that's even possible for him. He comes a little bit closer, he really reminds me of a weird alien cat when he moves like that... I really want some answers. I think I did the right thing, but that's my soul we're talkin' about here, so I want to know what happened to it...

"Well, I don't really know what happened... I just tried to use my Soul Gem to cleanse Sayaka's and afterwards they ended up like this, I guess..." I just hope Kyubey knows something about how to fix this, if he doesn't... I don't think Sayaka would take these news very well, though I'm feeling surprisingly calm. Considering the most likely explanation for this Soul Gem I'm holding in my right hand... I take the Grief Seed and throw it at him, he catches it and it's gone.

"I would have a lot of questions for you as well, Akemi Homura, but we have no time for that right now. I will have to process this new information and postulate an extension to my current theories concerning the nature and interdependency of Soul Gems. I will inform you once we have a conceivable explanation for this." Great, so in other words I'm on my own on this one, though Sayaka is probably stuck with me, judging by the colours of that Soul Gem... Hm, I guess it ain't so bad, at least it's better than the alternative.

"Uh, I guess I'll leave Miki-san in your care... Take her home with you or something, she's your responsibility now." What!? Before I can even ask her what that's supposed to mean she just flips back her hair and vanishes, I guess I don't have much of a choice... I could probably carry her all the way to her home, but that'd be way too far away, as if I'd do that... and I definitely can't leave her here in her condition. I guess I'll just 'rent a room' for tonight, hopefully she'll wake up tomorrow as if nothing had happened and be somewhat reasonable...

...

Author's note: Just a reminder, this section has no relevance to the story, feel free to skip it. Yay for (*Cough* slave labour *Cough*) motivating Daniel to write a little bit faster because he'll be sick for a while, here's the next chapter already. Hm, I'm not too sure about what we did here, but it's been done now and why not?

Even Kyubey doesn't understand Soul Gems completely and we'll specify those things later on a little bit, though I don't wanna spoil anything and neither of us has a diploma on Soul Gem physics and chemistry, but who cares, Kyubey himself failed at normal physics... by the way, you shouldn't expect the next chapter to come out this soon, though there's a very simple way to get the next chapter sooner. You just have to... ／人◕ ‿‿ ◕人＼

Forget it, I guess you'll have to wait... ▬▬ι═══════ﺤ／人◕ x◕人＼|══════════