thanks for the nice reviews so far! admittedly, this story is kind of OOC in the way that i don't really think moff would care if some kid would end up as miserable as he is. i tried to make it as believable as possible with these characters in mind but i officially declare that this story takes place in a "moff isn't a huge jerk" AU

It was approaching noon the day after... The Horrible and also Terrifying Realization, as Dade phrased it to himself. Kids were chanting and squealing, throwing food at each other rather than eating it, and usually Dade would be the one to scold everyone for their misbehavior but he was too busy dwelling on the previous night. The temperatures had dropped slightly but the welcomed weather change had done nothing to put him at ease.

He hadn't seen Harvey all day (or the twins, for that matter) and for once, he was glad. He had an inkling that seeing him in his current state of mind would do nothing but deter him from confessing even more.

It wasn't the slight chilled breeze that had silenced the thoughts swimming around in Dade's head, but, rather, a voice:

"Is there something wrong, Dade? You haven't touched your peanut-butter and jelly."

Dade snapped out of his contemplation to find Claire sitting on the bench next to him, peering into his lunchbox. He quickly recovered from his surprise and waved the fox girl off nonchalantly.

"Thank-you for your concern but I'm fine, Claire."

She adjusted her glasses, a suspicious look crossing her face. "You seem awfully interested in that tree over there... and also, 'I'm fine' is what my mom says whenever she gets home from marital counseling with Dr. Kaltz, and I don't ever think she's fine-"

"I said I'm fine," he repeated, more agitated. Mentally, he begged her to just drop it.

Claire decided not to probe further and she changed the subject. "Hey, are you gonna enter that writing competition thing that the library's hosting?"

That caught his attention. Dade's ears perked up.

"What competition?"

Reaching into the front pocket of her dress, Claire managed to fish out a neatly-folded piece of beige paper. Curiously, Dade took it and unfolded it.

"There's this contest for kids in the area to submit a piece of writing- you know, like narrative or poetry- and the winner gets a hundred dollars AND the chance to read their work on-stage! No specific requirements, it just has to be your own work and all." Her words corresponded with what was on the flyer. Dade's eyes were drawn to the bold phrase next to the little pencil clip-art that distinctly named next Monday as the due date for submissions. Just four days from now.

She tucked a brown strand of hair behind her ear and looked away shyly. "I really wasn't interested in participating, cause I like my writing private, but apparently my sisters have won first place all of the years they were eligible and my mom says-"

Hastily shoveling his food back into his lunchbox, Dade waddled off in the direction of Moff's house. The flyer was still in his hand. "Thanks Claire, see you later!" he called out.

"Wait, Dade! That's the only flyer I-" Claire sighed suddenly, defeated. "Always happy to help."

.

.

.

He pounded on the door with his free hand.

"Moff! Moff!"

"Who in the- oh. It's you," Moff greeted. He didn't appear at all shocked to see him on his doorstep, yet again. "Rabbit... boy."

Dade's grip tightened around the handle of his lunchbox, as well as the beige paper. He ignored the slight feeling of bile rising in his throat. "I... I thought about what you said before. You know, about the thing. And I need to talk to you... but first, you need to promise not to tell my mom."

Moff scoffed, but stepped aside. Dade took this as Moff's way as a welcome into his house and stepped inside. Hesitantly, he took a seat on the leather couch that laid parallel to Moff's TV set. Moff did not sit next to him, deciding to linger by the door instead.

"I don't even know what your name is, how could I possibly know your mother?"

"Fair point," Dade admitted. His voice was already hoarse. Why was he so nervous about just saying it aloud? "O-okay so I... I guess you could s-say... I like Harvey."

Moff's aloofness seemed to vanish at that point as he fist-pumped in the air, grinning.

"Aha! So I was right!" he exclaimed. Dade stared at the man, his mouth agape.

"Yeah b-but... how? I didn't even know it myself!"

"Intuition, my dear boy! It's a powerful tool if you know how to use it."

Without warning, Dade jumped to his feet, completely disregarding his lunchbox and flyer. He didn't feel himself do it. All he knew was that he felt the urge to start pacing. He grabbed his ears and pulled them in front of his face in attempt to cover up the fact that he was blushing.

"I... I can't believe all of this is happening," he spluttered. "I didn't think... I mean, I knew I liked him a lot, like A LOT A LOT, but I just thought that's how you felt towards best friends! Honest! I never... I didn't mean to crush on him on purpose or anything."

Uncomfortable, Moff rubbed the back of his neck. He seemed to have more on his mind than he was letting on.

"Ah... let me be real with you for a second- you see, bunny boy, I was in your shoes once."

That stopped Dade right in his tracks. He peered at Moff from across the living room, interest piqued. "In what way?"

"I had certain... unrequited feelings for a Beaks fellow."

"You mean, you liked Mr. Beaks?"

Moff nodded his head, a bitter glint in his goggles. "Irving and I- we were close friends as children. Best of friends, you could say."

"What happened that made things go so south?" Dade hadn't noticed the implication until it had left his mouth. "Er, no offense."

"None taken. I'm aware that this is not the ideal lifestyle for any up and coming young man such as yourself," he sighed. He made his way to the window, avoiding eye-contact. "I didn't know what I was feeling until it was too late. Irving had already gotten married by the time I realized it."

"You mean, you don't even know if he would've felt the same or not? You never confronted him about it?"

"How could I? We had already grown apart by then. Was I to go up to his doorstep and say, 'hey, I know you have a wife and child now and all, but do you mind leaving all of that behind to pursue a relationship with me?'? No. He has his family, I have my antique collection and anime box-sets. That's just the way things turned out for us."

"That's so sad! Again... no offense."

Moff turned from the window and met Dade's gaze. "I recognized this situation the moment I saw you and his kid. It made me queasy, to be quite honest with you, the thought of history repeating itself. I don't want another young lad to go through what I experienced! So that's why I decided to say something. I debated it, thinking that my instinct may have been wrong, thinking I might have been assuming too much," he explained. "But alas, I ended up being correct. As always. It's a gift and a curse!"

Dade pondered this information for a moment. It all seemed to add up.

"I remember what you said about the whole 'telling him' thing and I think I know just how to do it. You wouldn't mind helping me, would you?" he asked.

"Does your plan involve me getting into a Cupid costume?"

"No."

"Then I wouldn't mind hearing it."

Dade unfolded the flyer and smoothed it out on the coffee table before them. "This is it."

Moff's lip curled up in a sneer. "You intend on wooing the boy with a gross, wrinkled-up piece of paper?"

"There's a writing competition going on. Winner gets to read their piece out-loud! And some money as an award and junk, but I just care about the reading part."

"What do you want me to do?"

"You know... I need some adult assistance from someone who isn't my mom. I dunno, maybe you can spellcheck it or something?"

Moff let out an exaggerated groan. "Don't you kids have like, the Internets for that kind of stuff?"

"I thought you said you could help!"

"Alright, alright, fine. I'll be of assistance in your little poem. But if you win, I get 50% of the prize money, got it? It's a small price to pay for me saving your future." Or potentially ruining it.

Dade extended his hand out, finalizing the offer.

"Deal?"

Moff shook it heartily.

"Deal. Meet me back here at two o' clock on the morrow."

"Yes, sir."

Gathering up his things, Dade retreated to the front porch once more. Moff followed him, arms folded behind his back. He held the door, allowing some semblance of a smile to cross his lips.

"Now, if you'll excuse me, I have some business to attend to."

With that, the door slammed in his face. Dade was beginning to wonder why God had left him with Moff as the only person to understand his dilemma.

Of all the people in Littlebark Grove, why did it have to be Moff?