A/n: Time for chapter 2! I like this story so far. It's pretty entertaining. I find myself typing a lot in the chapters. Well in this chapter the girls are fighting again…figures. But things get real violent. Leave a review and be nice about it okay.

Chapter 2: Lord of the PMS

Warning: rated T for harsh language, crude and sexual humor, and violent catfights.

Maya awoke in the morning with a horrible feeling washed over her. She didn't even feel like getting up off the couch. She had horrible cramps and felt nauseas.

"Oh great. It's that time of the month again." Maya muttered bitterly. She wished she was a guy sometimes.

"You too?" Lady asked from the doorway. Maya looked up. Lady handed Maya a glass of water and some ibuprofen.

"That doesn't mean you can skip work. You will be helping me pay the rent." Lady said.

Maya groaned. "Alright fine, I'll get up." Maya said. She was always violent at this time. Ada and Trish better watch out today. She wasn't in the mood for their bullshit. Maya dressed in her leather outfit and waited for Lady to finish getting dressed. On the bright side, she would work alongside Dante today.

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Ada sat up in her bed, irritated. She felt hot and sick. And these damn cramps didn't help. Ada brushed her teeth and took a shower, frowning the whole time. She was sooo not in the mood for Trish's bullshit. She always had something sarcastic to say. Ada squeezed the wash cloth and scrubbed her arm raw red. She was already pissed off and the day hasn't even started. But at least she'll be able to see Dante.

My my my how unlucky for Dante that all the girl's were on there periods. They would inevitably start fighting, and not just simple insults but probably the toting of guns and swinging of swords. Well they all had one thing in common. They weren't in the mood for each other's bullshit. You know that's actually NOT a good thing.

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All four of the girls entered the Devil May Cry shop, not even speaking to each other. They didn't see Dante at his desk.

"Did he leave on a mission?" Maya asked.

"Not this early in the morning." Trish said.

They walked into his room and saw he was still asleep. He told them to come early and he isn't even up.

Lady took a pillow and smacked him with it. HARD.

"What the hell?" Dante said. He looked up at an irritated Lady.

"What the hell? That's my line! Now get your ass up so we can go find some damn jobs!" Lady yelled, reaching for his collar. But all she caught was skin. Smooth, hairless skin. Dear God, he wasn't wearing a shirt. Lady blushed pink.

"Put a shirt on! You're in the presence if a lady!" Lady said shoving him off the bed.

"By all means keep it off." Ada said, licking her lips.

Maya looked down on the ground, lest she get a violent nosebleed. She heard the phone ring and went to go answer it.

"I think I'll go take a shower." Dante muttered.

"Mind if I join you?" Ada asked seductively. As usual, she was dead serious.

Dante smirked. "I don't wanna make you cry." he said.

Trish couldn't believe her ears. He was returning her sexual comments!?

Lady threw a pillow at his back.

"Hurry up dammit! We have a job to do." Lady yelled.

Dante walked into the bathroom as Maya wrote down all the info they needed. Apparently they were supposed to go to kill all the demons in a run down old mansion. Sounded fun. Maya needed a good workout.

The 4 girls sat quietly. Then Maya finally spoke.

"Does your sword have a name Ada?" Maya asked.

"Yup. It's named Zanmato (sound like Yamato?)" Ada replied.

Maya stared at it. It had a golden sheath and the handle was gold and red. It was sharp and the steel was shiny, despite all the demon slaying Ada did.

Ada watched the door of the shower, wishing she had X-ray vision. Man she was as perverted as Dante. A few minutes flew by and no one said anything. Finally Dante got out the shower, getting a "'Bout time" from Lady.

How screwy. Lady still could not go on the mission with him alone. Lady sighed as they walked out the door. At least they weren't trying to kill each other. Lady spoke waaaaay too soon.

After about 30 minutes Ada started to complain.

"My feet hurt! I can't walk this long, I have flat feet! Dante are we there yet? Did you get us lost?" Ada complained.

"We aren't lost." Dante lied. He actually had no idea where the hell they were. Typical.

Maya walked silently as she noticed they had past that same moss covered rock 3 times. Oh yes, they were lost.

"NOO! We're lost! It'll snow soon and we'll be like the Donner party and be drinking our own pee and eating each other!" Ada cried. Trish rolled her eyes. It was the middle of summer.

"I nominate this one to be eaten first." Trish said, pointing to Ada.

Ada glared at her. "Yeah better than you. Who knows what we would catch from eating you." Ada said rudely.

Trish flipped her off. It was after 40 minutes past that Dante declared them completely lost.

"Oh great now we may run into cannibal natives. I can hear them now. Them be some juicy looking thighs girl, mind if we roast us up some thigh kabob. Ew thigh kabob." Ada said, as she sat on a rock.

Maya giggled a little. She was getting hungry though. She would sooner eat dirt and leaves than Ada's thighs though. She looked around for berries. She was an expert at survival in the forest, seeing as she was lost in one for 3 days.

"I need food. Didn't anyone bring some food? AHGH! I got a splinter." Ada complained.

"Will it kill you to shut the hell up?" Trish asked..

"Fuck you." Ada said. She stretched her legs and raised her arms high. Her muscles were beginning to cramp.

Maya sighed. She was feeling dizzy. And their constant bickering was starting to piss her off. She decided to go look for food.

"I think I'll go look for food. Dante will you come with me?" Maya asked innocently.

"I'll go with you instead." All 3 girls said at the same time. Damn. They catch on fast. But Maya had a few tricks up her sleeve.

"I thought your feet hurt Ada." Maya said. Ada glared at her. Sneaky lil bitch.

Maya dragged Dante away with her before Lady or Trish could protest. She worked fast, the result of having 6 siblings. By standing next to Dante, she noticed she didn't even come up to his shoulder. She would love to be as tall as Ada. But sadly her mom and dad and grandparents were all short so there was no hope for her. She had little chest either. Unlike all the other girls, she was still an A cup. Her butt was big though. Only bright side.

Maya wanted to say something but was too embarrassed to say anything. She had never gotten this close to him. The other girls were always hoarding him. Maya spotted a few berries in the bushes.

"Oh look! Those are perfect." Maya said, walking over to them. She was sure they weren't poisonous. But unfortunately our overzealous gal didn't study too much further into berry picking.

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"Agh! I will not lose out to some 15 year old little slut!" Ada yelled.

"The only slut I see here is you." Trish said.

"I'm about sick of your bitching, you damn bitch. I am so not in the mood for this." Ada said, getting up slowly.

Trish smirked. "A sad little girl you are. Why don't you just accept the fact that Dante has not interested in you." Trish said coldly.

Ada had her hand on her sword. Lady could see that if Trish wasn't careful, she could get beheaded.

"You don't even know what it is to love. You are a pure blood demon, are you not?" Ada said.

Trish turned around to face her.

"What's it to you?" Trish asked.

"Could he really love you? Someone like you?" Ada asked.

Trish thought back to before she met Lady, Ada, and Maya. When Mallet Island was collapsing. She blushed at the memory of them hugging (side note: This really happened at the end of DMC 1 and I was like what the hell? Did I miss something here?).

"We have shared more moments than you have with him. All he sees you as is a nuisance and a whore." Trish said.

And that did it. Ada drew her sword and slashed Trish right in her stomach. Ada was actually crying. Small tears were dripping from her red eyes. Trish drew her guns. Lady decided not to get in the middle. Plus, it was really mean for Trish to say something like that. She had it coming.

Trish shot her in the leg to slow her down. Normally she wouldn't bully a human, but Ada had attacked first.

Ada got up anyway and swung wildly. Trish effortlessly dodged each strike and tripped Ada. Ada fell, because of her leg injury but swung at Trish's legs, aiming to cut them off.

Trish charged her gun and with immense magic power aimed at her shoulder and shot her. But she missed and hit her right in the head. Oh shit. Ada was blown back and on the ground seemingly dead. Damn. How was she going to cover this up?

Lady gasped and walked over to check her pulse. She was… still alive? How in the hell does a human survive a shot to the head. Unless…

Ada was coughing up blood but she had a violent red aura coming from her body. No way in hell! Was she a demon? Lady backed up as she saw Ada's eyeballs flashing red.

"D-damn wench! Change of plans. I'm going to take you down clean. No sword." Ada yelled. She charged toward Trish, weathering all her bullets, jumped, and wrapped her legs around her neck. Trish fell forward. Ada also had her arms and pulled them forward as she choked Trish with her legs.

"You think one bullshit shot ends it all!? Not likely bitch! I've wiped my ass with demons better than you!" Ada yelled.

"Fuggin' psychoo 'itch." Trish coughed.

"Bes' save your strength for hell bitch, you'll need it." Ada said laughing like a drugged hyena.

Lady shivered. This wasn't the playful, joking Ada anymore. She was like… Lord of the PMS. A'int hormones a bitch?

"WHY WON'T YOU DIE!? IT'S GAME OVER BITCH! SNAP! CRACKLE! AND…" Ada's last words were muffled by a violent popping sound as Trish fainted, her arms clearly broken.

She fell to the ground as Ada laughed.

"PATHETIC BITCH THOUGHT SHE COULD BEAT ME!?" Ada laughed maniacally.

BLAM!

Lady shot Ada in the head repeatedly. After a whole round of bullets, Ada fell to the ground, defeated. Lady shook violently as she lowered her gun. What the hell just happened? Ada's head bled violently but she was still alive. Lady fell to the ground, right on her butt.

"What in the hell just happened?" Lady asked herself.

A/N: Creepy eh? I always liked surprise horror moments in a story that was supposed to be funny. But whoooo. I know you want to know what happens next right? Well leave a review! Let me know you like it so I know I'm not wasting my time. Thank you to all that have reviewed or have put this in their story alerts! You've been very helpful!